Thanks to everyone who is still reading this :) A little worse was probably an understatement. And hopefully, Santana can redeem herself! A big thank you to bodybroke.
Enjoy :)
12th January 2021
Fran climbed out of a cab, and up to the front door; she rang the bell relatively quickly. She smiled as Santana opened the door.
"Fran... what are you doing here?" Santana asked
"I'm taking you on a date. Go get ready..." Fran said, leaning in and pecking Santana's lips; obviously not recognizing the surprise written across her face; "Dress warm, okay?"
"Fran, I don't really wanna go out tonight." Santana said
Fran sighed, taking Santana's hand and squeezing it softly; "Please... Come on, it'll be a few hours."
Santana sighed; "Okay... I'll go get ready."
"Hurry." Fran called after her; as Santana made her way to her bedroom to get ready.
Santana hated spontaneous dates. She couldn't see the point in them. She had to be rushed into changing because whatever she was wearing wasn't right for the occasion. It just seemed like a waste of time.
It must have been a month into dating, when Brittany asked if she actually liked being surprised with dates. Santana wasn't that surprised when she asked, Brittany had always been the one to understand her better than anyone else.
Finishing tugging a matching scarf around her neck, she arrived outside; and met Fran talking to the cab driver. Talking would be an understatement. Santana had learned through casually seeing Fran that the woman was an ultimate flirt. She would flirt with everyone and anyone. Busboys, shop assistants, cab drivers.
It was times like this that she couldn't see what she even found attractive in Fran. Yes, she was aesthetically pleasing to the eye. Medium length blonde hair, slender figure, hazel eyes; but Santana found herself missing bright blue eyes.
Pushing away thoughts of that particular blonde, Santana cleared her throat as she walked up. Fran turned around and smiled brightly.
"You're ready..." Fran commented as she climbed inside the cab, Santana sighed and climbed in beside her.
Fran told the cab driver to go, before turning to Santana. She leaned in and rubbed her thumb against her cheek; "You must have rushed your make up."
Fran smiled her almost patronizing smile as she turned to her window to watch the scenery go by. Santana almost wanted to snap back some witty remark, about how she had rushed because Fran had forced her to. That this stupid date was already worsening her bad temper.
The cab stopped between 48th and 51st streets, Santana took in the Rockefeller Center, and internally smacked herself in the face for not repeatedly telling Fran just how much she hated ice skating.
"I thought since it's winter... Ice skating would be fun." Fran said, stepping out of the vehicle, holding her hand out for Santana to take.
"Fran, I've told you about ice skating." Santana said
"I know but you've never been ice skating with me before." Fran replied as she turned and walked off to collect ice skates for the pair of them.
"It's not even about who took me." Santana grumbled to herself before following after Fran.
After a lengthy period of around about 15 minutes to lace up their skates, Fran was more than enthusiastic to be on the ice. Santana on the other hand was dreading it.
Fran stepped onto the ice, and took off. Santana held onto the rail surrounding the ice rink, her eyes widening in disbelief as she saw Fran taking off without her.
"Come on slow poke." Fran teased as she skated up beside her; "Still holding onto the rail? Come on, Santana."
"I don't like skating, Fran. I hate it." Santana gritted out, trying not to get to angry
Fran leaned over and took Santana's hand; "Give me the other one... I won't let you fall."
"No, Fran. I don't wanna skate." Santana mumbled, tightening her hold on the rail
"Come on, Santana... For a few minutes." Fran said, letting her glove covered hand quickly tug Santana's hand off the rail.
"Fran!" Santana snapped as she was tugged forward by Fran
"It's fine... You're fine." Fran replied, as she skated backwards, tugging Santana forward.
Santana's legs unable to skate even with Fran pulling her to; ultimately gave way when Fran decided that Santana was doing great, and let go of her
With a pained cry, Santana slammed down against the harsh ice; her gloved covered hand took all of Santana's weight as she fell on it.
Fran let out a surprised gasp before kneeling beside her; "Are you okay? You must have slipped."
"Yeah... because you fucking let go of me." Santana snapped, as she struggling to get up, strained whimpers emitting from her mouth as she had to press her weight onto her injured hand; Fran offered to help but Santana simply glared at her.
"Santana, your hand's probably bruised. Let's take you to the hospital." Fran said, as she grabbed Santana around the waist, and tugged her to her rather shaky feet. As they reached the benches surrounding the place where Santana had lent the skates. Santana slammed herself onto a bench, her free uninjured hand making quick work of the tangled laces.
"This is all your fault." Santana hissed as she threw the first skate on the ground below; before moving on to the next; "Couldn't have listened when I said I didn't want to go out... Or when I told you I hate skating... No, because you wouldn't have all this attention."
"Stop being so melodramatic. It's a bruised hand... Pardon the pun, but put some ice on it, and it'll be fine." Fran replied, picking up the skates and walking to collect their shoes back.
Santana tugged her glove down and saw that her wrist and hand had bruised badly. Santana held back the painful whimpers which were threatening to be released as Fran arrived back with their shoes.
"Here you go." Fran said, passing Santana, her white converse; "Do you want me to take you home?"
"Fran, I'm gonna go to the hospital. Tonight proved a lot of things..." Santana said; as she slipped her feet into the white pumps; "And it's that we're not right for each other... You don't listen to me at all, and the fact that I would have only had to tell Brittany once that I hate skating... and she'd never bring me here."
Fran rolled her eyes; "You're breaking up with me over skating? Do you realize how pathetic you sound?"
"We're not even dating, Fran. I'd hardly call us dating..." Santana said
Fran sighed; "Whatever... You were damaged goods, anyway... and comparing me to your ex-wife, wow! Good luck!"
"She's not my ex-wife!" Santana snapped to Fran's retreating figure
"See you at work." Fran replied
Santana stood up and walked the opposite way, signaling a cab, she directed him to take her to the nearest hospital.
After a two hour wait, Santana was given an x-ray which confirmed that she had thankfully only bruised her hand. She was given some painkillers, and advised not to go ice skating until her hand healed.
13th February 2021
"I'll call you when I've landed." Brittany said, tugging her bag strap over her shoulder
"I can't believe you're leaving." Kitty said
Brittany laughed; "I know... but I'm excited for this, Kit."
"Are you sure part of your excitement isn't to do with the fact Santana and her new lady love have broken up?" Kitty asked
"I am happy she's not seeing anyone, yes... but she still wants to, Kit." Brittany replied, with a sad expression; "I can't be with someone who wants other people when things get tough."
"Well, just be careful. I will come to New York to smack a bitch up." Kitty said
Brittany giggled, "Thanks, Kit. I should go, but thank you for everything."
Kitty rolled her eyes before tugging Brittany into a hug; "You're welcome, bestie."
Brittany pulled away, lifting her strap to her shoulder; before gently walking away. Pausing at the gates only to share another sad smile goodbye with Kitty.
24th March 2021
Santana wiped a towel over her face, removing the fresh beads of sweat; she placed it beside her before warmly accepting the cold bottle of water from Quinn.
"Thanks." Santana mumbled, quickly taking a long sip
"So... Are we gonna talk?" Quinn asked
"About what?" Santana replied, quirking her eyebrow up
"Brittany's return." Quinn said softly
Santana placed the bottle down, "Brittany's back?"
"You didn't know?" Quinn asked
"Does it look like I did?" Santana snapped
"Easy... I bumped into her last week. I thought you knew." Quinn said
Santana threw her table beside her; "I can't believe she wouldn't tell me."
"Can you blame her?" Quinn asked
Santana turned to look at Quinn
"You haven't told her about you ending whatever you had with my sister." Quinn said
"That's different." Santana mumbled
"Well, maybe she thinks you don't care... I mean you're seeing other people, you didn't even tell her. Why should she tell you she's back?" Quinn asked
"I didn't tell her, because she wouldn't agree to it. Do you know how badly I wanted Brittany... Fran... The thing with Fran was stupid, I know that... but I realized a lot, Q. I know Brittany's the one for me. I've stopped seeing other people. Fran was the only one anyway. I know Brittany's the one for me." Santana said, scratching the back of her neck
"But you kept Fran from her, you didn't even tell her, San." Quinn pointed out
"I did that for her. If I told her as soon as it happened, Brittany would have been more than angry." Santana said
"Did you ever stop to think that maybe that's why Brittany didn't tell you about going on the tour right away? Has none of this really not given you a better understanding of why Brittany did everything she did? Yes, she made mistakes, but after being in her position a bit, can't you at least understand her motives a bit better?" Quinn asked
Santana sighed deeply, she repeated Quinn's words in her head, she could understand where Quinn was coming from in regards from Brittany not telling her about the second tour. Honestly she could understand it, Brittany wasn't a bad person, she knew this much. But Santana's worry was that if they managed to agree to be together again, that it would be rushed, and fumbled together, and no time would be spent in working out their problems. Santana was worried that they would just jump back into everything, without solving anything. She wanted to make sure she forgave Brittany, and Brittany had forgiven her before they moved on together.
"Besides, Fran was never the issue with us. The issue with Brittany is that I wanted to see other people." Santana said, trying to clear her mind from Quinn's words
Quinn released a deep breath; "Why did you start something with Fran? Why did you want to see anyone?"
Santana turned to Quinn; who looked serious.
"Honestly?" Santana asked
"Yeah..." Quinn replied
"Honestly, I felt lonely... it was a stupid mistake, which I totally regret... but I just missed having someone there... I guess I thought that I could replace the void which was left... But I couldn't... because I can't replace Brittany with someone else... And I learnt the hard way." Santana replied; "I'm in love with Brittany, and I can't choose to be with others because it's not working with her."
Santana looked from Quinn to the floor; letting her pump covered foot scratch across the ground; "Britt, she knows everything about me. How I like my meat, how I like my baths run... She knows it... But I don't know her anymore. And that's the problem..."
Quinn sighed; "She's the same person, San. Have you thought maybe the reason you don't really know her is because recently, she'd been unhappy with her life in general. I mean... You didn't notice how unfulfilled she was."
"I know, maybe it's my fault... I know, I've been more than harsh for refusing to forgive her over lying... But it's always there, Q. I've probably done worse... And I know she won't forgive me easily for Fran... but the truth is I'm hurt by her." Santana replied; "I'm hurt because we feel like it's coming to an end. Lying is one thing but she's doing it all the time."
Quinn sighed but didn't answer.
"Sam, going back on tour... coming back from tour... When she keeps something from me, she's lying to me." Santana said
.Quinn sighed; "Do you want her back?"
Santana shrugged; "I want Brittany back but I want us both to know that this time its it... I'm not gonna keep the past with us, it's gone, it's done... but I can't handle anything else."
Santana laced her fingers together
"Honestly, I think we need space right now... to work things out. I need to get it through my stupid brain that Brittany wants me and only me... and she needs to know that I am in this relationship for us." Santana said; "Right now... I've probably fucked things up, with Fran... but we have a lot of history, and we can't forget that we loved each other once... and I still love her. It's hard not to love her..."
"San, you know this isn't over right? You and Britt aren't over, you never will be." Quinn said, pausing to look at Santana; "Do you know how stupid you've been? Brittany's your soul mate, San... She's yours; and you're hers... I don't think I've ever seen people so in love and yet, practically doing everything in order not to be together."
"You don't get it... No one gets it. I love Britt, she's Britt. It's impossible to not love her." Santana replied, rubbing her temple; "I don't want a part time wife... She's chosen dance, and then lied to me about everything."
"You don't think Brittany not choosing dance after college was a clear sign? She chose you then, Santana. She chose you every time Santana. I think you're punishing her because you're job isn't what you want, but Brittany's been in your position." Quinn said running her fingers through her hair; "Santana, you shouldn't have to do this... The idea of a marriage, a partnership is to help each other achieve their dreams, not hold it against them when they finally gain it."
Santana sighed, not agreeing or disagreeing; "I just think we're two different people, right now... I'm still upset about everything."
Quinn clicked her tongue against her teeth; "San, I think you're punishing her because she's living her dream at the level she's happy with; and you haven't. You wrote once for a newspaper before being fired."
"I worked for 6 years for a chance to shine; she looked for a few months, and found her dream. How is that fair, she nearly cheated... She lied so many times and she gets a reward..." Santana replied; "I'm angry because she's... I'm angry and that's why I asked for a break... because I can't risk being with her and purposefully hurting her."
Quinn shook her head; "Santana, you can't try to hurt her; or punish her for something you know she's sorry for her. Yeah, she lied about something... but that's all. You need to think whether you really wanna risk losing Britt over a silly stupid mistake."
Santana nodded; "I get that. I do... I'm gonna fix things, I just... I don't just wanna rush into things for them to fall apart afterwards. I did that last time, I forced myself to forgive her and forget... I want to be sure that it's completely forgiven."
"I get it... Just don't let it be too long." Quinn said, as she squeezed Santana's shoulder before walking out of the gym room.
19th April 2021
Santana switched on her phone as she walked around her bedroom, getting ready. Brittany had agreed last night to meet up and talk about them. So Santana was getting ready to meet Brittany at her dance studio. She had agreed with Quinn, and had a long think about what she wanted. And whichever way she looked, Brittany was always what she wanted. So they had both agreed that the slow and steady pace is what they needed, in order for their marriage to be better.
Santana grabbed her phone and jacket, before walking out of the house towards her car. Santana drove at a steady pace to Brittany's dance studio; parking at the first available parking space.
Santana walked towards the entrance, pushing the door open; she stepped inside; and saw Brittany locked in an intimate embrace with tall guy. She softly pulled her hands from around his neck, as she freed herself from the hug.
"You're early..." Brittany commented, looking from Santana
"Yeah... You're busy. I'll come round another time." Santana quickly replied; stepping backwards, and smacking her hand harshly against the closed door. Santana fumbled until she finally left the building, making a short walk towards her car.
She flinched when she felt a hand grip her injured wrist. The sensitive flesh burnt from the rough grasp. Santana noted it was Brittany's. "Get off me."
"Not until you calm down." Brittany replied, tugging on Santana until she turned round; "I'm not sleeping with him. He's a friend from tour... He was happy to see I was in New York."
"Whatever... You can sleep with whoever you want... It's not my problem." Santana mumbled, ever so gently trying to slip out of Brittany's hold
"God, why do you do that? You do care if I sleep with someone else, so why act like you don't?" Brittany snapped
"I don't care... We're not together, are we?" Santana replied
"And whose decision was that, Santana? Yours, again..." Brittany hissed; "You didn't care what I wanted. As long as you're happy..."
"You think I'm happy without you? I could never be." Santana replied
"Then stop pushing me away, you're the only one I've ever wanted..." Brittany murmured softly; "You know this... We're together, even when we're not, we are. I want you back, Santana. Would you take me back? I'm not leaving for tour, I'm not choosing anyone else over you. I just want you."
Santana remained silent, the unease was building up inside her
"Britt, you're... I still think a break is needed for us, we can barely talk without an argument happening. It's pathetic how we can't get on right now." Santana said softly
Brittany scoffed lightly; "You know what's pathetic? Wanting someone who is using every excuse not to be with you. I'm pathetic, because you've treated this marriage like it was nothing... because you didn't have the decency to even tell me you were going to see other people. Isn't that pathetic? You chose to fuck other people without telling me, Santana. You asked for a break, I thought it was like last time... I thought you just needed time to sort your head out, not someone to fill my spot in your bed."
Santana sighed; "Would you have listened if I told you? No, Britt. You would have tried to guilt me into feeling sorry for you. And I would have listened... So I didn't bother talking to you about it... I mean what's the point anyway? Our marriage was in trouble long before Fran came into the situation."
"Now you know why I didn't tell you about the tour, because you would have tried to guilt me into not going." Brittany replied, "Santana, we belong together... You know I want you."
"Brittany..." Santana started, stepping back
Brittany stepped closer, gently letting her fingers touch Santana's face. "Santana, please... baby."
Santana tried to tug her wrist free; "Britt, we need this space right now."
"This isn't right. We need to work at us... We can't just leave it to chance." Brittany's hand gripped tighter against her wrist; and she now realize what Quinn was trying to tell her. That it was never over. It never would be.
"Brittany, stop." Santana said
Brittany looked up and met Santana's soft brown eyes; she quickly let go of Santana's wrist as if touching her burnt her.
"Sorry... You're... I'm sorry." Brittany mumbled, looking embarrassed; "You're right... This is... Space. We need space."
Santana shook her head; "Britt, you don't have to be sorry. You're right... I do wanna work on us. I just... I can't just jump into being with you."
"Yeah, I know... I shouldn't have done this. I shouldn't have to beg you to want me. You should just want me..." Brittany said, as she ran her fingers through her locks; "But you don't... And that's fine. I need space..."
Santana watched as Brittany fumbled as she stumbled backwards
"I have to go... I have class..." Brittany said
Santana sighed but nodded slowly; "Britt, you know I love you... I love you so much... but I don't want to be with you right now. I need some space, and I think you do too. We need space to work on us."
Brittany laughed hollowly; "I need space... You're right, Santana. Thank you for making me realize this."
"Don't be patronizing, Brittany." Santana quipped
Brittany scoffed; "Patronizing is telling me I need space... I need space because you don't want me anywhere near you."
"I do... I've never said that. I do want you, Britt, of course I do. I want to be with you again, but just not right now, not when we're just gonna jump back into everything, without solving anything." Santana replied
"You fucked someone else, Santana... Do you think I want to think about that? Being near you is a constant reminder that you treated me and our marriage as nothing." Brittany snapped; "And the worst part is... I'd take you back in a heartbeat because I know that I'd spend every day of my life with you, and I'd be happy."
Brittany smiled sadly; running her fingers back, to scrap any lingering hairs away from her eyes.
"I'm sorry... I was wrong for not talking about seeing other people..." Santana said; "But you know I want to work on us now. I've stop seeing anyone... You know this."
Brittany waved her hand, brushing off Santana's words; "I have to go."
Santana nodded; and turned to open her car door.
"Was she even worth it?" Brittany asked, making Santana turn round to meet her expression, it pained her to see Brittany's normal blue eyes filled with a hint of sadness.
"No one is worth you, Britt." Santana replied
Brittany nodded, but chose not to reply; as she turned round to walk back to the studio. Santana climbed into her driving seat, and slammed the door with a grunt of frustration.
1st June 2021
"Mom, I've told you multiple times, we're not breaking up." Brittany repeated once again to the phone; it had been a few months since she had decided to reconnect with her parents. They hadn't fallen out, but simply lost touch. Her parents had taken their empty nest as an opportunity to fulfill their dream of visiting different areas of Europe.
Brittany was more than glad to have her mother back in her life; as of recently, she felt differently towards Marley and Tina; they had always been her and Santana's friends; and she knew they would never be impartial; and there was always the threat that anything she said would eventually arrive back to Santana. And since there was not really a Santana and Brittany anyway, it was hard to talk to them with the awkward acknowledgment of her nearly failed marriage. Kitty had been her godsend. She had been more than comforting over the phone, and when they had met up occasionally, but Brittany had felt bad for using up most of their time by discussing her and Santana.
But her mother, Brittany knew her mother would understand about her and Santana; and that she wouldn't be judging. Except the fact, her mother talked often like a parrot.
"We're taking some space." Brittany said, as she switched her phone to the other ear; as she resumed slicing up the carrots; "I mean... We talk more often... Often than before."
"Honey, you know what happens when you take a separation. It's only gonna end in divorce." Anna replied
"God, mom. Way to comfort me!" Brittany grumbled
"It's a fact, Brittany. Santana's a good woman, she loves you... I don't see why you can't work this out." Anna said
"It's not even about that, mom. The fact is Santana doesn't want to work this out right now." Brittany said
"Brittany, marriage is hard... You can't just give up." Anna replied; "If I gave up as easily as you two did... You wouldn't have been born, Brittany."
"Mom, I know marriage is hard... I haven't given up. I want Santana back. I do... but if Santana needs some space... Then I'm gonna give it her." Brittany said
"It's your choice, kiddo." Anna replied softly
Brittany hummed in response, because how was she suppose to respond, it wasn't her choice anymore. It was Santana; "I should go... I need to finish cooking. I'll call you next week."
"Sure, kid... Don't be a stranger." Anna murmured
"Love you." Brittany said
"You too." Anna replied
Brittany clicked her phone off; throwing it beside her on the kitchen counter. Sighing deeply at her mother's words of warning about leaving her marriage in the state it was in now. Brittany wholeheartedly agreed with her mother; but it wasn't her decision anymore about how this would end up, it was up to Santana.