Words : 1,500
Warning: mentions of alcohol, boy/boy kiss (no slash)
A/N: So I just want to mention that I appreciate whenever someone leaves me a review and lets me know what they're thinking. I try to individually thank everyone that reviews but in case I miss any, I apologize and thank you now :)) And also, I'm not sure about this chapter. I couldn't seem to get it "just right," but let me know what you think!
Lucius and Severus each grabbed their glasses of firewhiskey and made their way to the sitting room. Severus sat down on the sofa and Lucius sat down across from him on a chair.
"So," Severus said, "Narcissa is cutting again?"
"Unfortunately." Lucius said. "Only this time Draco has found out. He walked in on her sleeping, but there was blood all over. He's not handling it very well. And Narcissa can't handle Draco and me being away from home so much."
"Lucius, how is she going to respond to The Dark Lord's request?" Severus asked. "Having headquarters here? I can't imagine she will take it very well. And there is nothing you can do."
"I'm not sure exactly. I mean she will probably stress over it all. I know she doesn't want Draco or me to be involved with this anymore, but she knows we can't back out now." Lucius said. "On the other hand, it might help some because she will be able to be involved. Unless we're on missions she'll know Draco and I will be safe. She might even be able to start being involved with missions."
"I don't know if it's a good idea to get Narcissa involved with missions. I know what she was like when we were younger and I've seen her now. She's strong. She's very strong. She was strong enough to come to me and ask me to protect Draco. And she is probably strong enough to do anything to protect him. But I don't know if she's strong enough for what we do. I really don't think that she should get involved with our missions."
"I know, I know. You're right Sev. I guess I'll have to tell her though. Draco already knows so I just have to make sure I tell her before he does." Lucius said as Severus nodded. The two men sat in silence drinking their firewhiskey. Lucius got up, went to the kitchen, and returned to the sitting room with the bottle of alcohol. "More, Sev?"
"Lucius, do you realize we're drinking at 7:30 in the morning?" Severus asked.
"And does it look like I care?" Lucius replied taking a deep drink fro his refilled glass. He poured more into Severus' glass. Severus noticed that the bottle stayed completely full although Lucius had just poured two glasses out.
o.O
The men continued drinking and talking. Around midday both men were slouching on the couch drinking. Their robes were draped over the back of the couch and their shoes were kicked off on the floor. Both men had plenty of alcohol in their systems; however, Lucius had a noticeably greater amount. Although Severus had removed his robe and shoes we still looked well put together. Lucius on the other hand was slouching on the couch with disheveled clothing and out of place hair.
"This is just like when we were young Sev. Remember?" Lucius said to the younger man. "Do you miss me at all, Sev? Do you miss us?"
Severus looked taken aback. "Lucius. You're drunk you need to go to sleep."
Lucius moved closer to the younger man and replied quickly, "No, I'm not. I miss you a lot. Please come upstairs with me." He grabbed Severus' hand.
"You're wife, Narcissa, is upstairs sleeping. And at this moment she is setting a good example. That is where you should be as well."
"No." he retorted, "come with me. She won't mind."
"Why don't you lay down here and I'll come back later after you talk to Narcissa and Draco." he said as he put his hand on Lucius shoulder to try and push him back. Lucius removed Severus' hand and brought his face to the younger man's.
Severus could smell the alcohol on the blonde's breath. "Don't do this, please." he said. Lucius moved his face closer and closer to Severus until his lips brushed lightly against the other man's. Severus let Lucius' lips linger over his for a few moments until he pulled his body back.
"I know you miss me, Sev." Lucius said.
"I do." he admitted quietly. "Lay down, Lucius" he added more forcefully as he pushed the older man back. Lucius finally obliged and laid back on the couch. Severus extracted himself from Lucius. The blonde man's eyelids were already shut and Severus bet he was close to sleep. He grabbed a blanket from the back of the couch and covered Lucius with it.
Severus took their glasses and the bottle back into the kitchen thinking about Lucius' kiss. He knew it really didn't mean anything. Lucius was drunk. Lucius was really drunk. And Lucius was happily married to Narcissa, well as happily as an aranged marriage could be. They truely loved each other and cared about each other. Severus and Lucius could never be what they used to be. Especially not now that the mannor would be the dark lord's headquarters. He would never stand for something like that. Severus made his way to a sitting room on an upper floor and laid down on a sofa.
o.O
Severus woke up around dusk and had to look around before he remembered why he was on a sofa and not in his bed. He sat up and put his slightly throbbing head in his hands. He felt bad for when Lucius was to wake up, for he had significantly more to drink than himself. He stood up slowly and went to see if anyone else was awake yet.
As he was making his way down to the ground level, he heard a soft voice come from a room in the wing he was passing. "Sev, is that you?"
Severus stopped and turned toward the direction of the voice. Narcissa's head peaked out from a doorway. "They're still sleeping, I just checked. Would you like to come in here talk to me for a bit?". Severus looked at her a bit longer without moving either way. "I mean you don't have to if you were heading out, or don't want to or anything."
"Sure, I'll talk Narcissa."
"Okay" she said with a smile. "Come on in here.". Narcissa pulled out a chair for Severus to sit in before going around to the other side of a long dining table to sit across from him.
"So, how have you been?" he said looking at her.
She let out a soft laugh, "Sev, you know the answer to that question. I've been awful, miserable, scared to death, worried, anxious, scared, hurting inside, hurting outside, and hurting the people around me. But I'll just say I'm okay."
"You need to focus on you, Ciss. You need to focus on yourself getting better, which you can only do by trusting that Lucius and Draco will be okay."
"I can't do that. Draco or Lucius or you could be killed any night. What if the Dark Lord decides you're not good enough anymore? One or all of you could be gone and what would I be left to do?" her eyes were watering and she looked up at the ceiling willing herself not to cry.
"Narcissa, nothing is going to happen" he assured her with a false sense of hope. "You're going to have to be strong for Draco and Lucius these next couple of months. And you need to start by showing them you don't need or want to cut."
"When I cut last night, it wasn't the same. I usually cry, cut, feel relief, then feel exhaustion and fall asleep immediately. It wasn't like that though, I was relieved the same, but I wasn't tired at all. I just wanted to keep cutting. And that really scared me." she told him honestly.
Severus studied her for a few moments before responding. "It scared you, there's some part of you that doesn't want to cut. You just need to make that part overpower the rest of you. And I know its not easy, but you can do it. I know you can." he paused again. "You need to find something else to do when you're upset. Go to Lucius, just let him hold you til you calm down. If he's not here maybe write in a journal or go for a walk until he gets back. It's little steps to start taking. And you won't be able to stop immediately, but taking small steps will change six times a week into four, and four into two and so on."
"You're killing me. You act like this is so easy." she said with a groan.
"Trust me, I know how hard something like this can be." he said softly.
"I'm debating heading home, Lucius should be awake soon and you have some important matters to discuss. "
"Important? What do y.."
"Yes. We do Narcissa." a steady voice said from the doorway. Narcissa turned around to see a slightly disheveled Lucius standing in the doorway.
"And that is my cue to leave. Lucius. Narcissa. I'll be back whenever I'm needed."
A/N: And again, I'm not sure about this chapter so let me know what you think and any ideas you may have. I'm stumbling upon a writer's block!