AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer.
I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while.
The only character I own is Jet, and well, he's based on my brother, so that makes it a little weird.
Also, the Kim in this chapter is very much based on yay4shanghai's Kim in Jared and the Sociopath He Imprinted On, another great story.
Again, very special thanks to her! She rocks!
We're getting closer to more M-rated stuff, including a discussion in this chapter about orgasms. If listening to a teenager be curious about sex bothers you, you probably don't want to read the rest of the story, because this is just the beginning! You have been warned!
This is a bit of a spin-off from the last chapter ("Genitalia") of yay4shanghai's A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size. If you haven't read it or its accompanying story Enough With the Gravity Moving Already, you need to!
This is my first FanFiction story, so please review and be gentle!
******************************************************************************
Chapter 3: Why It Should Have Been Ethan: The Later Years
It hurt, as we distanced ourselves, watching my best friend position being replaced by David Uley, the oldest and least intelligent of the twins. I didn't see that they had much in common early on, knowing that Ethan was one of the brightest stars on the reservation, while David probably would have been long forgotten, if he were not the Alpha's son and the presumable heir to the throne. They shared a common passion, though: a strong desire to join their fathers as protectors of La Push in the forms of big hairy wolves.
My replacement best friend became the wolf-girls, learning as much as I could about the ins-and-outs of who we were as a pack, and though I was not yet an official wolf-girl, most of them didn't mind me tagging along. I loved listening to their stories, having Kim braid my hair, and though, I was a self-proclaimed daddy's girl, I felt special with the wolf-girls. I didn't mind chasing the younger kids around or helping Emily bake cookies for the wolves. Here, with the wolf-girls, I felt needed and appreciated. I could be me.
It was also during this time that I met Jet. Jet was the son of one of Mom's old high school buddies. His family now lived in Oklahoma and he had come to spend the summer with his grandparents in La Push. Mom invited him to our annual "Fourth of July Fireworks Feast," a name clearly thought up by Dad. I was playing "Go Fish!" with Amber, when Jet came through our front door. He didn't look entirely too different than the rest of the La Push boys, but he was taller, buffer, and, quite frankly, he wasn't one of the La Push boys. He was different, a tad exotic, if you can call Oklahoma exotic. I couldn't take my eyes off of him.
"Jet, this is my daughter, Trisha. She's just a year younger than you. I'm sure you guys will get along just fine," Mom said, introducing us, and then walking off to the backyard, yelling at Dad about fire extinguishers.
"Pleasure to meet you," Jet said, nodding his head and sticking out his hand for me to shake.
"It's good to meet you too," I stuttered, knowing I wanted to get this boy as far from the others, quickly. I grabbed his hand, leading him out the front door, "Let's go for a walk and I'll show you around."
"Okay," he chuckled, "Where're we goin'?"
"Around," I said, in my sweet little 12-year old voice. "So, Jet, how old are you? What's Oklahoma like? How long will you be here? Where do you live in Oklahoma? What do your parents do? Do you have any pets?" I'm not sure where all the questions came from, all I knew was I wanted to know everything about him.
He laughed, but was still holding my hand, "Let's see, I'm 13. Oklahoma is really hot right now. I will be here until the first week in August. I live in Oklahoma City. My mom owns a bakery and my dad does land surveys for a natural gas company. I have two dogs and a fish. Does that cover it? I can't remember."
I smiled, "I think so. I like your accent, by the way." It was only a slight accent, a little Southern but not.
"Thanks, I think, I didn't really realize I had an accent. Now, it's my turn. How old are you? What's it like living on a reservation? What is there to do around here for fun? Do you have any pets? Are you allowed to date?" Like mine, his questions seemed to come from nowhere and ran together. His last question made me smile, wondering if it was a question or an invitation.
"I'm 12. Living on a reservation is okay, I guess. I've never lived anywhere else. We usually go to the beach or cliffs for fun. I don't have any pets, but I've been begging my parents for a dog. I'm not really sure if I'm allowed to date, I'd have to ask my Dad," I spit out in one breath.
We walked around to the backyard where the wolf pack, wolf-girls, and wolf kids all stood watching as Jake and Quil fought over a hot dog. "What's with that?" Jet asked.
"Oh, that's just grown men acting like dogs," Emily said, walking from behind us, glaring at Jake and Quil. "Trisha, who's your friend?"
"My name is Jet Ross, ma'am. I'm visiting my grandparents, the Russells for the summer," he said politely.
"Oh, you must be Colleen's son? Of course! Well, welcome Jet," Emily said, pointing to the circle of wolf-boys, "I'm Emily Uley. Why don't you go meet the boys? The two biggest ones are my sons. That one," she said pointing to the biggest of the two, "is David. And that one is Mark. The one between them is Ethan and the one on the end is Taylor. They're Kim and Jared's sons."
"Emily, leave the kid alone! You're scaring him," Sam said, pushing Jet towards the boys.
"Well, I guess I just lost him too! Perfect!" I thought in my head.
"Actually, sir, if it's okay, I'd like to stay with Trisha," he said, again with a polite tone.
The wolf-boys weren't oblivious to what was going on and they glared at me, as Jet made his way back to me, taking my hand again. I think, at this point, I had only known him a total of forty-five minutes, but I liked him. He stayed with me throughout the party, and sat with me as we watched fireworks by the cliffs. Then his grandparents came to steal him away from me.
"Trisha, would it be okay if I called you tomorrow? If it's okay with your mom and dad, I wondered if you might like to go to movies," Jet said with confidence, nodding to my parents, who were curled into each other, smiling.
"Daddy? Would that be okay?" I asked, trying to sound as innocent as possible.
"Well…I guess that would be alright." Daddy said. I smiled at Jet. "I'll even take you guys myself." Wonderful, nothing says a night of romance like Paul Wise sitting behind you at a movie theatre, kicking the back of the seat, when your eyes are anywhere but the movie screen.
"I'll call you tomorrow, Trisha. Sweet dreams," Jet said walking to his grandparent's car.
"Bye, Jet!" And as I turned around, instead of the wall of tan men I had become accustomed to, I turned into a wall of tan boys: Ethan, David, and Mark. I wondered where Taylor was, knowing he would be livid to think he had missed an opportunity to interrogate me.
"So, I guess you found a new kissing buddy," Ethan said, his words harsh and clearly meant to hurt me.
I was beyond pissed. In case he had forgotten, he was the one that made the decision to not be my "kissing buddy." "What's it to you, Ethan?" I searched for my dad to come rescue me, but he had already stepped inside the house. Everyone was inside, but me and the Three Amigos. I stepped around them, glaring, making my way to the door.
They all three turned around, not following me, as Ethan said, "We just don't like him is all. I'm surprised you would. I can only imagine what he thinks of you, if he's already so into you after only knowing you for three hours. What kind of a girl does he think you are?"
David chuckled, elbowing Ethan, "Dude, you would know." Ethan and David laughed, as Mark stood silent. So, then I did the only reasonable, logical thing I could think of. I punched David Uley square in the nose and yelled, "That's what kind of girl I am!" Then I ran like hell to my bedroom, slamming the door for dramatic effect.
Of course, David started bleeding, and then crying, and for a minute I felt bad, but that feeling went away quickly, as he ratted me out to all the wolf-parents. Damn him! There was a knock on my door.
"GO AWAY!" I screamed.
"Yo, Trisha! Calm down. It's Uncle J. Open up and let me in."
I knew this was going to be good. I opened the door, just a crack. "What?"
"I have something for you," Uncle Jake chuckled, slipping a crisp $10 bill through the crack, "Next time, try to take 'em all three out." I wasn't sure why he was paying me for hitting a teenage boy, but I wasn't going to ask questions. He started walking away, before turning around, "You might want to start your own waterworks, babe. The 'rents are on their way and they are NOT happy."
Uncle Jake's evaluation of the parents was not entirely true. Mark had told them exactly what happened, being honest about all what Ethan and David had said. (I would have to remember to thank him later. I was still fuming right now, though.) I got a lecture on the importance of controlling my emotions and not listening to "dumb pubescent teenage boys" as Dad called them. No one was really mad at me. Kim brought me an ice pack for my hand, though I really didn't need it, and even Sam patted me on my back, asking Mom if she had taught me to punch like that.
There was someone that was mad. Ethan didn't talk to me again for the rest of the summer. I spent most of my days with Jet, walking along the beach and learning more about Oklahoma than any one person should want to, until August when it was time for him to go home, and I said goodbye to my first real official boyfriend. Then, as school started, I was alone again. The wolf-boys wouldn't let me sit with them at lunch anymore. Ethan wouldn't even say talk to me at recess or at pack parties and bonfires. I once again took refuge with the wolf-girls. It was different this time, though. It hurt more. It was more than just losing my best friend again. It was like I was walking around in a daze. I couldn't enjoy anything without him. The school year droned on, and the wolf-boys quit coming over, deciding instead to spend their days at the Uley house.
Before long it was winter break, and when Mom asked me what I was going to get Ethan for Christmas, I cried for a week. I thought maybe the new year would ease the tensions, so I decided to muster up the courage to talk to Ethan when we went back to school.
"Hi, Ethan! How are you? Did you have a good break?" I asked, smiling.
He didn't even look at me. He just walked off. I hated this. I just wanted to go back in time and erase the last year. If it would have made him happy, I would have even erased our kiss, though it was one of the only memories that had allowed me to keep from completely going over the edge. I went to the nurse's office, faking a stomach ache. Kim came to pick me up.
"Where are Mom and Dad?" I asked putting my backpack in the backseat.
"Doing stuff. I told your Mom I'd come get you. I think you and I need to have a little chat," Kim said seriously. We drove to the Wahalla house in silence. I looked out the window, watching the beautiful scenery go by, thinking about all the things Ethan and I had done together over the years, and how none of that seemed to matter to him anymore. As we pulled into the driveway and I started to get out of the car, Kim put her hand on mine, stopping me from unbuckling my seatbelt. I looked up at her, she looked upset and maybe it was the streetlights, but her eyes were sparkling as if they were wet.
"Trisha," she said, "do you know about Uncle Jared and I? Do you know our story?"
I didn't know much about it. I knew that Aunt Kim's life before she and Uncle Jared were a couple was not a good one. No one really said anything else about it because bringing it up was a definite mood killer.
"Before Jared, I was a very lonely person. My mom was not a very good mom, not like your mom. I never really felt loved until Uncle Jared, and I didn't really know how to love before him," she turned her face to look out the window. I couldn't really see why she was telling me this story. I didn't see how it had one thing to do with Ethan and me. "And when he said he loved me, I couldn't believe him, I had no trust-- I pushed him away. I did everything I could to keep him at a distance, not wanting to admit that someone could want me." She turned to me and smiled, "But Uncle Jared never gave up. After everything I put him through, he never stopped. I'm telling you this because I want you to know that when you love someone, you fight for them. You fight for love. You forget all the shit they throw at you and you just love them. Just like Uncle Jared did me."
I was crying now, knowing what she meant and having an epiphany about my own feelings for Ethan. I realized that the reason it hurt so much was because I still loved him. Even though he had said mean things to me and ignored me, I still loved him. She knew it, too.
"You love him, don't you?"
I nodded.
"I know my son, Trisha, and I know he loves you, too. He's just too much of a boy to tell his friends to shut the fuck up and let you know how he feels."
Okay, this actually felt worse than thinking he hated me. This meant that he did love me, just not enough to fight for me.
"What am I supposed to do, Kim? Why should I be the only one that has to fight?" I sobbed.
"Because you're a wolf-girl, and we carry that burden better than our men. Sure, they think of themselves as the protectors and the warriors, but where would they be without us? Huh? What would they have to fight for without our love?" She pursed her lips, thinking, and then continuing with her story. "Now, I know you're not an official wolf-girl, but I'm sure your day will come. The question I'm asking you now is if you could choose your imprinter, your soulmate, your equal, who would it be?"
I could only whisper his name, "Ethan. I would want it to be him."
"Then there's your answer. That's why you have to be the one to fight."
I laid low for a few months, waiting for my opportunity to show Ethan I would fight for him, for us. My thirteenth birthday rolled around in February and the promise of Spring lay around the corner. I tried to plan how to let Ethan know how I felt, but nothing seemed to be quite right. So I put it in the hands of fate, hoping that an opportunity would present itself, and I wouldn't be too chicken shit to seize it.
And then it came.
A bonfire, just like all the others before it. I noticed the other boys pestering Ethan, who was refusing to partake in the normal hamburgers and hot dogs, revealing, after watching a documentary about meat processing plants and the cruel treatment of the animals, he was going to be a vegetarian.
"Who the fuck let him watch that anyway?" my Dad asked, as Jared shrugged and shook his head. Leave it to Paul Wise to put it so eloquently.
I could tell the harassment was wearing on him. Ethan's normal smile was replaced with a straight, thinking face. I watched as he got up and started walking away from the bonfire along the beach. I decided to follow him, not closely, just enough to make sure he was okay. He stopped and turned to look at me.
"Ethan, I wanted to say that I think it's really cool that you've decided to be a vegetarian. I know you've always loved animals. I know my opinion doesn't matter much, but I wanted you to know." I turned around and started to walk away.
"Trisha." He said my name! He actually freakin' said my name! I turned back to look at him. "You're wrong," he paused. "Your opinion matters more to me than anyone else's."
That was it. That was all I needed. I ran to him, jumping up to throw my arms around his neck, and planted my lips on his. This kiss was so different than any kiss we had ever shared. It took me a second to realize that he was kissing me back! He moved his hands to my butt, pulling my legs up. I wrapped them around his waist, as he licked my bottom lip, requesting permission for our tongues to touch. Of course, I gave it to him. Our heads moved rhythmically, as he kept one of his hands on my butt, while the other made its way to the bottom of my shirt, then under the hem, up to my breast. I was trying to figure out where the hell he had learned to do that, but at the same, didn't really care. I think at that point, I may have actually moaned, as I could feel something pushing in between my legs. I pulled back for a second and looked at him.
"Sorry," he said.
My eyes got big. "Sorry for what? For kissing me? Please, not again Ethan. I can't take that again," I said, my eyes starting to fill with tears.
"Actually, I was apologizing for the hardness in between your legs." He was actually apologizing for being turned on? It was kind of ironic, because if girls could have a hard-on, I totally would have had one.
"To be honest, Ethan, I would be a little insulted if I didn't feel anything coming from that area," I said slyly.
He laughed and then crashed his lips back to mine. This continued until we started to hear footsteps, and my Dad's booming voice calling me.
"I'll be right there, Daddy. I dropped my, umh, earring, and Ethan's helping me look for it," I was a really bad liar and I knew my Dad was not that dumb, but he took the bait.
"Okay, sweetie. Do you need more help? I can send a couple of the other boys to help look for it."
"No, Mr. W, I think we got it," Ethan said, his hand in mine behind his back.
"Whatever," Dad said walking back to the bonfire. Ethan turned towards me, giving me another quick peck on the lips.
"Trisha, I know that I've not been all that nice to you over the last few months. I didn't quite have the strength to stand up for you. I don't want to lose you again," he whispered, fearing that someone else might decide to come look for us.
"I know, and as much as I want everyone in the world to know how much you mean to me, I am willing to keep 'us' quiet, until your we're ready," I said, also whispering.
"Thanks. Honestly, your Dad scares the shit out of me. But I don't think I can not not see you," he chuckled.
"We'll just have to sneak around, then. You know me, I've always been one for a little adventure." We both laughed, knowing it was entirely true.
So that's what we did, for six whole months. We snuck around. We'd meet at the beach, at the library, at the park, wherever. And we talked, making up for lost time, and kissed, and touched. I told him how much I loved him, and though he had yet to say it back, I knew he loved me too. By this point, he knew every inch of me, touched pretty much every part of my body, and I his. It wasn't weird like I thought it would be. I remembered watching videos about male anatomy in health class and gagging at the mere thought of touching a boy's "downstairs," as Aunt Emily called it. (Aunt Kim used much more colorful words to describe it. And though she loved me like a daughter, I don't think she would have appreciated the fact my hands were all over her son's "one-eyed monster.")
It never went beyond touching, and neither one of us had an orgasm, per se, not that I knew what an orgasm was or felt like. But as time went on, I became curious about it. So I called the sparkilicious one herself, Nessie.
I had had the "sex-talk" with Mom last year when I started my period, but I liked talking to Nessie about things that I couldn't ask any of the other wolf-girls. Partly because I knew she'd never tell anyone I asked. Though, I think she did tell Jacob, I didn't really care, because, like my Dad, I had him wrapped around my little finger.
"Trisha! How are you, young lady?" Nessie asked in a sing song voice.
"Good. Hey, Ness, what does an orgasm feel like?" I said it just like that, too. No pause from the response to her question.
She choked out a cough and said, "Hold on just a second." I heard her moving around and the closing of a few doors behind her, obviously moving to a different room to have this particular conversation. "Okay, now what did you just ask me?"
"I asked what an orgasm feels like."
"Trish, why do you want to know? You're 13, you don't really need to know what an orgasm feels like just yet. Do you even know what that means?"
"Well, I sorta know what an orgasm is. I think it has to do with sex because one time I heard Aunt Helen say when she and Uncle Collin were messing around and he had an orgasm right away, but she couldn't until she got on top and smacked him around a little. And I heard Taylor ask Mark Uley if he had an orgasm everytime Quil said his name, whatever the hell that's supposed to mean." I was trying to get it all out as fast as possible before I chickened out on the conversation.
"Watch your mouth, Trisha…though, knowing who your father is, I supposed I should expect such language." I could almost hear her shaking her head on the other end of the phone, as she took a deep breath. "Okay, I'll tell you, but if anyone EVER finds out I told you this, you will be in serious pain. Don't forget my parents are vampires."
I shuddered at the thought of her parents biting me and muttered, "yeah, yeah, yeah."
"Okay, well, an orgasm is a sexual thing, which means you shouldn't be having one anytime soon, young lady," she said quickly as if it were part of a script she had to cover before getting to the good stuff. "It's intense pleasure and a bit of pain all wrapped up in one. It's like a tingling explosion of euphoria, while you loose control of your body, and give in to being part of someone else, even just for a minute," I cut her off there.
"Wait. It only lasts for a minute? What's the big deal if it's only for a minute?"
"Oh, but it's so worth it. Sometimes it can last longer than that, and sometimes it can happen a few times during one act. With my Jacob," I cut her off again.
"Uh, sorry, Ness, but do you think we could leave my uncle out of this. I'd like to actually look at him again."
"I apologize, Trisha. So, is there anything else you wanted to know?"
"No, I think I got it. Tingling explosion, lasts a minute, yada, yada, yada. But if I think of anything, I'll call. Thanks, Ness. I love ya!"
"I love you, too, Trisha. Call again soon!"
I still had no clue what an orgasm felt like, but that was about to be the least of my problems.
******************************************************************************
*NEXT CHAPTER: "Keep Your Goddamn Hands to Your Goddamn Self"