Ch-Ch-Chapter 7! Hello everyone! I'm sorry it is late, but I was at a sleepover. But who cares? I'm here now with a lovely new chapter! At least, I hope it's lovely. I really do. Any who, let's begin!
The stairs led to a hallway, which was completely pink. There were eight rooms, and four of those doors were pink. One was light blue and the other three were first two doors were pink, and Feferi stopped me at the one on the right. "These two rooms are for favorites. This one will be yours! The other one is empty," she said.
Next was one pink door and one beige. The beige door was on the left and the pink door was on the right. "These are also for favorites, but the beige one was changed for Jane, who is our mother's granddaughter. Jade is in the one to the right. I bet you'll be seeing them soon!" she exclaimed. Feferi was certainly excited.
The next two doors were beige and light blue, beige being on the left and light blue being on the right. "This light blue one is John's room. He's always in here because Meenah tries to stab him all the time."
"One day, blue boy. One glubbin' day, I will get you," Meenah said, shaking her fist.
"No you will not!" John yelled through the door. I stifled a giggle.
"The other room is my room. Do you wanna come in and see?" I nodded, and she opened the door. Inside was a giant fish bowl, with a bed, a dresser, a desk, and a lot of cuttlefish inside. "I take care of those cuttlefish. They can be annoying, but I love them!" Feferi exclaimed. One of the cuttlefish saw her and swam over to the glass. Feferi giggled and pet the glass.
"Wanna here ma opinion? I think you should cull them," Meenah said.
"When I'm empress, culling will mean taking care of the sick and weak," Feferi said.
"We know I'm gonna win!"
"Pardon me, but what exactly are we talking about?" I asked. I understood that culling meant killing, but they had lost me at the future empress argument.
"There can only be one empress, but each empress has two daughters. The daughters will battle to the death when the mother dies. Neither of us want to be empress, but Meenah is much stronger," Feferi explained.
"And that sucks because ma sister is really adorable," Meenah said, drawing out really so it sounded like reel-ly.
"Well that is quite the predicament," I muttered.
"Yeah, but who cares. Anyway, the next door on the right is mine," Meenah said. "I guess you can go in there, 'cause my mom will get pissed if I don't." She opened the door. The entire room was neat. The walls were pink, as was her dresser. She didn't have a desk, but instead there was a treasure chest that was overflowing. On the dresser was a small fishbowl with a cuttlefish in it. There was an odd object in the corner. It was purple, resembled a cocoon, and was filled with green slime. There was an entrance on the top.
"What is that?" I asked, pointing to said object.
"Oh yeah, I forgot about you weird humans. That is a recuperacoon. We sleep in it, and the sopor slime stops us from having night terrors," Meenah replied. It made sense, as I had seen the same in Feferi's fish bowl.
We walked out of the room. "The last room is our mother's. Don't go in there unless she requests for you. Anyway, that ends our part of the tour. The Amporas will pick you up soon," said Feferi.
"Gill," Meenah said seriously, staring straight at me. "May cod have mercy on your soul."
Feferi began laughing. "Oh my cod, Meenah. The Amporas aren't that bad. Eridan's really nice when he isn't depressed," she said, also drawing out really.
"What about Cronus?" Meenah asked.
"Okay, Cronus is a huge pervert." The sisters giggled, and I smiled nervously. Great, I was being forced to hang out with a pervert.
"Hey, don't tell the truth," the older brother said. He was leaning against the wall. "I mean, I can't blame any of you if you want me." He pronounced his w's strangely.
"Cro, don't embarrass me," the younger brother muttered as he reached the floor. "You're the only bigger douche than Sol."
"Great! You guys are here! Have fun Claire!" Feferi exclaimed. She walked closer to Eridan and said, "Watch out for her."
"Sure thing, Fef," Eridan replied. "Are you ready to go Claire?"
"Yes," I replied. Cronus tried to put his hand on my back to lead me away, but Eridan elbowed him in the stomach and stood between us. Feferi and Meenah went into their rooms, and the brothers led me back to the throneroom. The Condesce and Dualscar must have left to do work, as they were no longer in there. The brothers brought me up the light purple staircase.
It brought us to a light purple hallway. It also had eight doors. Two were yellow, and the other six were light purple. "Alright, these first five rooms are empty. They're for guests and shit, but we never have any," Eridan said. The first five doors were all light purple, and the last one was across from a yellow door. "The yellow door closest to us is my room. It's basically just filled with shitty wands and doomsday devices that never work," said Eridan.
"You are a fan of magic?" I asked.
"Yeah. It fuckin' sucks that it's fake," he replied.
"I disagree. Maybe we just explain too much of the world.," I said.
"Alright, that's enough about magic. The other room with the yellow door is mine. You can come in if ya' want," Cronus offered. I looked to Eridan, who was mouthing 'no' over and over.
"No thank you," I replied. Cronus visibly deflated.
"The last purple door is our dad's room," Eridan said. "Now we have to show you the training grounds." The brothers brought me back to the throne room, and out the door. They brought me back to the pink hallways, and through the third door on the left.
This door led us outside, where there was an obstacle course set up. There was a clearing, and young trolls, both male and female, were training by fighting each other. Dualscar was watching them with the Condesce, occasionally yelling out advice or commands.
"Hey dad," Eridan called. Dualscar turned to face them. "What are you doing?"
"These soldiers wish to become threshecutioners. They are demonstrating for the Condesce, and she will choose the best," Dualscar answered.
"They all glubbin suck," the Condesce remarked. And she was true. They were all using sickles, although it looked like they had never picked one up in their life.
"Alright, stop!" Dualscar commanded. The soldiers obediently dropped their weapons. I was surprised to see that they weren't wearing any armor, and many had cuts along their face, arms and legs. Already, the ground was looking more and more like a rainbow. None of the trolls seemed to care, as if this was an everyday occurence.
"You have all been soldiers for five years," Dualscar started. Five years? They looked like they were in their mid-twenties. Or rather, at least ten sweeps old. How old did you have to be to join the military here? "However, the Her Imperious Condescension was not impressed. None of you will be threshecutioners." All of the soldiers groaned, and walked away. The Condesce and Dualscar followed.
"See, threshecutioners are the highest ranking soldiers. You have to rank at least a green blood to even train to be one," Cronus explained.
"My bud Kar wanted to be a threshecutioner, but he is a mutant," said Eridan. "Anyway, that finishes our part of the tour. Why the hell did we bring you here, it's not like you're gonna train."
"Thank you for bringing me here. I am very grateful," I said, although I wasn't looking at either of them. The training grounds connected to other parts of the castle that were outside. More importantly, it connected to the moat. If I could get my friends, we might just be able to escape.
"Where is Gam? He's probably passed out in his room," Eridan muttered.
"Nah, brother. I'm right here, getting my motherfucking climb on," a male troll said. He was sitting on the tree watching us. He looked like the Grand Highblood's son, with the same horns and wild, curly black hair. He had on white make-up, making him look like a clown. His baggy black shirt had the dark purple sign for Capricorn on it. His pants were gray with purple polka-dots, and his purple shoes were untied and much to big for him. He was lanky, although he seemed strong.
"Gam, why are you in the tree?" Eridan asked.
"Well, you told me to meet you here so we could show Claire around. And me and Kurloz got bored, and we decided to have some motherfucking fun. You got a faygo by any chance. That shit is a motherfucking miracle," he said.
"No, I don't. Just get Kur and show Claire around," Eridan said.
"Sure thing, invertebrother. Hey Kurloz, we need to motherfucking go, brother," Gamzee said. His brother poked his head out of the leaves. He had the same horns and hair as Gamzee, and had make-up. He jumped out of the tree. His outfit was one-piece, and was black with white bones, making him look like a skeleton. His boots were purple, and over his outfit he had purple underwear. He was tall and lanky, but not as thin as his brother. Gamzee hopped down after him. He was also tall but a bit shorter than Kurloz.
"Alright, I'm gonna go now," Cronus said, practically running back into the castle. Kurloz smiled. I looked a bit closer, and I realized that his lips were stitched shut.
"Well, I'm gonna go and take care of some shit. See you later, Claire. Bye Gam," Eridan said, following Cronus.
"Yeah, bye brother," Gamzee said as he waved. "Alright, sis'. Me and my brother Kurloz are going to get our motherfucking show on, and take you to some places. Alright?"
"Yes," I replied. Kurloz gave me two thumbs-up, and then walked through the door. Gamzee and I followed. They brought me to the door that second to the left of the training grounds.
"Alright, sis. This is the courtyard. It's where we get our motherfucking execution on, and kill a motherfucker," Gamzee said as he opened the door. The courtyard was made up of gray cobblestones, and in the center was a wooden object that had chains hanging from the top. The ground around it had all the colors of the hemospectrum. There were two towers at opposite ends. One looked like where the Condesce would watch. The other held the same white dragon that had taken Calliope.
There were a few trolls playing. One of the girls pushed a boy, who scraped his knee. His blood was orange, and the girl laughed and drew a crowd of a few more kids. Then one of the girls stood in between the trolls, and warded them away from the boy. "Yeah, the motherfucking caste system is bullshit. The opposite of miracles, sis," Gamzee said. "I'm a motherfucking highblood, and I don't even care." Kurloz made a few motions with his hands, and then nodded in agreement.
"Are you sure it's safe to say something like that here?" I asked.
"Who cares? I haven't been motherfucking caught yet," he replied. "Anyway, let's go.
I'm getting all up and motherfucking depressed from being here." The brothers led me back to the throne room. They took me up the dark purple stairs.
The hallway that it led to was dark purple. All eight of doors were dark purple, but three of them had markings. One had a face that looked like this: :o). One had a bone, and the other had the Capricorn sign."Alright sis, the door with the clown face is mine. The one with the bones is Kurloz's. The last one is our dad's. Anyway, do you wanna see my room?It's full of motherfucking miracles."
"Okay," I replied. Gamzee didn't seem like a bad person, even if he was a bit off. He opened the door. The room had a recuperacoon, and was filled with paintings, bottles of orange liquid, pie tins, and horns.
He picked up a horn and honked it. "Honk honk honk," he said. "What do you motherfucking think."
"The paintings are nice," I answered, trying desperately not to sound rude. The paintings were abstract, and had all colors imaginable. "What are they based off of?"
"Motherfucking miracles," he replied. "Hey, do you want motherfucking Faygo?" he asked, picking up one of the bottles.
"No thank you," I answered. Gamzee shrugged and gave a bottle to Kurloz. How Kurloz managed to drink even though his lips were sewn shut, I may never know. They both seemed satisfied after drinking the sugary elixir.
"Alright sis, I think that this part of the motherfucking tour is over. Let's go find the next lucky motherfuckers." We went back into the throne room, where two men were waiting. They looked like Darkleer's sons, as they had the same horns, and were both gigantic. "Hey Equius. How is my motherfucking bro today?" Gamzee asked.
"I am not your brother, nor do I like you. And I must request that you stop using such language. Er, that is if you wish to, of course," Equius said. His long black hair fell to his shoulders, and cracked black glasses were covering his eyes. One of his horns was broke, as were many of his teeth. His black shirt didn't have sleeves, and had the dark blue sign for Sagittarius in the middle. His pants were striped, and had light brown shorts over them. His shoes were black.
"Okay man. I'll try," Gamzee replied.
"No, you can't take orders from me. Oh, I think I need a towel," he said as he began to sweat.
"Okay. Anyway, my sis here is Claire. Are you guys gonna show her the motherfucking place?"
'Yes, Gamzee," Equius replied.
"Motherfucking yeah. Alright, see you later Claire," Gamzee said. Kurloz waved, and they walked up the stairs.
"Alright Claire. My name is Equius Zahhak," Equius said.
"I'm his older brother Horrus," the other troll said. He had a leather helmet that covered most of his face, and black goggles that covered his eyes. Some of his black hair stuck out of the top, and the rest was pulled back into a pony tail. His tunic was tan, with six yellow buttons on the chest and brown sleeves. His belt was brown, and had the Sagittarius sign as a buckle. His shirt under the tunic was black. His breeches were brown, with high black socks and brown boots.
"We will be showing you our rooms, and the stables. Follow us," Equius said. I followed them up the dark blue staircase. Like the other hallways, it had eight doors. All of the doors were dark blue, as was the rest of the hallway. The last three doors each had a different symbol on it. The first had a bow and arrow, the second had a face that looked like this: 8=D, and the last had the symbol for Sagittarius. "The room with the bow and arrow on it is mine," Equius said.
"The room with the horse face is mine, and the room with our symbol is our fathers," Horrus said with a wide smile. "We would invite you into our rooms, but we both have very dangerous fighting robots. We wouldn't want to put you in harm."
"What is a robot?" I asked.
"A robot is a metal machine. We build them to spar with," Equius replied.
"You mean like the metal legs Tavros has?"
"Yes. I built those for him. Robots are like that, except are designed like the entire body of a troll," he said. "I think we are done here. Let's go to the stables." The Zahhaks led me back to the hallway. We went through the door in between the training grounds and the courtyard.
The door brought us outside. There was a small stone clearing with eight wooden stables. Equius opened the door to one. Inside was a strange white creature that looked like a crab. It hissed at us. "This is the crab lusus. It is always cranky." It hissed again, and snapped its claws angrily.
"How about we look at another," I said. Equius nodded, closed the door, and brought us to the next stable. It had a white ram. The ram walked out excitedly and nudged against Equius. "This is the ram lusus." The ram walked over to Horrus, who knelt to pet her as gently as possible. "She is more calm than the crab lusii."
"I can see that," I said as the ram walked over to me. I pet her head, and she had the ram equivalent of a smile on her face. Equius led her back into the stable, and the opened the next one. Inside was another one of the bull fairies. It fluttered out of the stable.
"This is Tinkerbull," Horrus said as he pet the fairy. "Utterly harmless if he is alone." The fairy flew over to me. I pet his head, and he fluttered away satisfied.
The next stable was opened, but both Horrus and Equius insisted that I should stay behind them. Inside was a white monster that had two heads, each head with one eye. The one on the left had a red eye. His faces were covered in honey. "Good. The younger Captor has fed the Biclops," Equius said.
"Claire, this is the Biclops. If he hasn't eaten mind honey, don't go near him. He could be dangerous," Horrus said. The Biclops certainly didn't look dangerous, even though he was taller than me. He groaned, tried to stand, and fell over.
The next stable had a white cat. She was the size of a lion, and had two mouths. She mewed, but didn't get up. "This is Pounce de Leon," Equius said. Pounce opened her bottom mouth and yawned. She was as just lazy as my cats Jaspers and Mutie, both sadly deceased.
A giant spider was in the next stable. "Please close the door."
"Why?" Horrus asked.
"Spiders are freaky. And this one is huge. Just shut the door," I replied, my voice barely a whisper. The spider looked straight at me as Equius shut the door. We moved on to the next stable.
This one held another Hoofbeast. "This is Arthur. He is our lusii," Equius said. He pet Arthur, which resulted in a bruise on the creature.
"No, Equius. You have to be gentle," Horrus said. He pet Arthur softly. "Poor Arthur got his eye taken out."
Poor thing," I said, trying to sound like I was completely ignorant on the matter. Arthur didn't seem to remember me, and instead picked up a tray in the corner. The tray had a glass of milk on it. Equius accepted it and began to drink it, even though it was crushed within a few seconds.
"Equius, you must be gentle," Horrus repeated. Equius growled and the milk seemed to steam from him. "Uh, how about we see the next lusus," Horrus offered. We left Equius in his stupor to go to the last stable. This one had Dualscar's seahorse.
"This is Orphaner Dualscar's steed," Horrus said. "And the last thing we have to show you. We'll just wait here until the Serket's come." I nodded, and he closed the stable. I couldn't help but notice that before the door closed, the seahorse neighed, almost as if in recognition.
Wow that is a long filler chapter. I'm sorry if it was boring. The next chapter is continuing the tour, but important stuff actually happens. And, of course, I probably won't be able to update until Friday or Saturday. I'm not sure yet, so keep an eye out when the time comes. Also, if you have any opinions on which of the stories mentioned last chapter that I should write, PM me about it.
Alright, I'm out.