Dancing Fools 5
Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Hasbro. I own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos. Red Witch owns the Misfits! Dancing with the Stars belongs to ABC.
Chapter 7: The Mandatory Cross Dressing Chapter!
Multiple was broadcasting through the TV,
"Ladies and gentlemen. We apologize for interrupting our regularly schedule program, but we have important news concerning the Church of Humanity and ABC studios. From what we can tell, members of this mutant-hating terrorist group have infiltrated and taken hostage ABC's top executives, and will not release them until William Stryker is brought to them and a man named Persiana13 is brought to justice. The whereabouts of these two individuals are unknown at this time. It is possible Stryker may be getting a sex change in order to escape his captors. That concludes this broadcast of the Multiple News Network."
He looked, his eyes widening,
"TRINITY, GET AWAY FROM ME!"
Multiple ran off camera, Trinity in hot pursuit. Cyclops yelled,
"You see the mayhem you've caused, Persiana13! That's it! You're just as nutty as Red Witch!"
He then got hit with a mallet and fell unconscious. Wanda smirked,
"Better."
Huh, I had no idea those guys would be serious in going through with their plan. I suppose it could be worse.
Diablos said flatly,
"Yeah, they could come here."
You're right. I can't have that happen.
The author made a phone call.
Deadpool, it's me. How long before you're finished with the sex change? What do you mean can't? You did WHAT? Deadpool, I'm not paying you to harvest his organs for Mister Sinister! Just get the operation done!
The author hung up,
Worst case scenario; I might actually have to do something drastic.
Red Witch asked,
"Like what?"
I'll let you know.
Red Witch rolled her eyes,
"Whatever. Let's get back to the show. Now, our next couple was one I came up with; Pietro and Xi."
That's right. Now, the dance style I picked was one that I had to contemplate on what dance I could make them do. Then, it hit me. What is the most humiliating way for a guy and…whatever Xi is, to dance to? The answer is…Ballet!
Pietro entered in a pink tutu, shouting,
"I protest! This is NOT who I am!"
The audience burst into laughter. Wanda grabbed a camera,
"Oh, this is SO going on our homepage."
The camera flashed. Pietro pleaded,
"NO! YOU WOULDN'T! PLEASE! I'LL DO ANYTHING!"
Red Witch said,
"Then do the ballet with Xi."
Xi entered, also in pink tutu and make up,
"I have read up on this dance, this…ballet. I still do not understand."
Wolverine covered his eyes,
"Someone end this insanity already! I was better off fighting the Hulk!"
Beast was stunned,
"You have demeaned a worthy dance, Persiana13, by making those two dance this!"
Hey, that's not my problem. My problem is ratings. If you don't want to see it, you can tell the fans why not.
Jean was horrified,
"Don't make us face them! They're just as insane as you are!"
Hey, no one bashes my fans!
The author whipped out a rocket launcher and fired. Jean ran,
"HELP! HE'S NUTS!"
Red Witch smirked,
"Now that that's out of the way…get dancing you two!"
As Pietro and Xi did ballet, the two attempted to execute all the required ballet stunts; pirouettes, turns, spins, but they kept getting in each other's way. Finally, Pietro hefted Xi into the air, but fell down, Xi on top. Pietro yelled in pain,
"MY BACK! I LANDED ON A NAIL! MY BACK!"
Xi shrugged,
"I feel fine."
Xi got up and broke his ankle,
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"
Red Witch covered her face,
"I work with idiots."
You're telling me?
Red Witch said,
"Let's just go to the judges before I decide to shoot someone."
As long as I am NOWHERE in your line of fire, please, proceed.
Cobra Commander shouted,
"You call that dancing? The drunks at the last Cobra Christmas party had more talent than you! Zero!"
Is that where you got your first kiss, Commander?
Cobra Commander said,
"Yes it was…WHO TOLD YOU THAT!"
Emma Frost rolled her eyes,
"You two are pathetic. Zero."
Pietro was stunned,
"You can't mean that!"
He turned to Magneto,
"Daddy?"
Magneto shrugged,
"Sorry, Pietro. Zero for me too."
Pietro cried,
"You don't know talent! I'm gonna be better than all of you someday!"
He ran away, sobbing. Xi blinked,
"Well, he's not going to be my dance partner anymore."
It looks that way. Well, when we return from our commercial break-.
Beast asked,
"Who do you have sponsoring this insanity?"
Beast got hit with an electric eel,
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"
As I was saying, when we return, we're going to see another Misfit couple that is DYING to get on stage. Stay tuned!
Next Chapter:
The Insanity continues!