Author's Note: I'm back! Wow, a lot has gone on. I hope you all are happy with this next chapter! I am going to be updating more often now. The hiatus is over! How are you all liking season 9? I love you all so much! Enjoy!
Plunk! Haillie's head makes contact with the wall. Instinct kicks in and Ava runs over to her new found sister. The world starts to spin in Haillie's eyes. Pounds pulse through her small skull. All she can think about is why her daddy would do this to her.
"GET AWAY! YOU'RE EVIL!" Crowley shrieks as his delusion drags on and on. IN his eyes blood is puddled everywhere on the floor. His dark eyes flash from Sara to Ava to Haillie and back to Sara. Their eyes appear to be completely black.
Ava holds Haillie protectively in her arms. Although confused she is determined to stay strong for her new little sister. They bonded. The moment they first saw each other it clicked. Both of them felt the love between them, and they knew that it was something more profound than friendship; They were meant to be family.
"Haillie, it's okay," Ava whispers to the sobbing girl in her arms. There was obviously something wrong with their father. He may be moody, but he is completely acting strange. "Don't cry," her voice cracks still speaking to her little sister. She understood why Haillie was crying, but Ava just wanted her to stop. She feels a trickle stream down her red cheek.
"Girls, go upstairs. Just stay upstairs. Everything will be okay when you come back down. I-I promise," Sara tells the girl, her girls. This wasn't the Crowley she wants them to know. The Crowley she knows may be a complete jerk sometimes and lose his head, but at the end of the day he was a person who cared about a select group of people.; These girls and herself are the people.
Moving slowly to sit up, Crowley's view adjusts. He sees Sara. Not the Sara with black eyes.; This is his Sara he has known almost for forever. "Sara?" the words fumble out of his mouth. His accent so thick she almost didn't recognize her own name being said. "My love," Crowley starts sighing as he goes knowing what has happened. None of it was real. He imagined every last bit. "I'm sorry," he appologizes trying to regain his bearing to stand up. He leans against the freezing cold wall when doing so to keep his balance.
Sara embraces him in a tight hug knowing that the worst is over. Or they were just in the calm eye of the storm. Only time can tell. "Crowley, are you alright?" she asks snuggling her face into his suited chest. His shirt, jacket, and tie are all soaked in sweat. She had experienced his nightmares before, but they were never like this, ever. He nods his chin brushing the top of her head. "The girls and I were so scared," Sara whispers to him looking for some comfort, for him to tell her that it won't ever happen again, that he has everything under control, that he has assessed the situation, that it can't happen, that he s stable and fine and will go back to being the same old Crowley that she has known, that she has loved for all of these years. Sara knows back in her mind that, that won't come from his mouth because he knows that he is scary, that he knows he needs someone, something, to help him get better, but he won't do it.; Crowley is stubborn. He refuses to admit when he's in need. He refuses to admit when he just needs to step back. He feels like he can take on the whole world by himself, but he can't.
"Sara, my love, the kids are scared of me now. I don't know what to do. I know you want to more than anything be with me here, to heal me, to make me better, but maybe we just both need to admit that I can't be fixed. I'm a demon. I was made to be evil and sick and demented. I was created to torture, cause pain, and destroy. I was designed to do it all with a smile. There was no feeling. There was no 'well, you can care about these people.' It's hard for me to try to act like something I'm not everyday.; i'm not human. It hurts to pretend to be. I don't understand what or why I'm feeling the things I do. I am caring and loving, and it's all foreign to me. I can walk into hell, whip out a blade, and start torturing those poor souls without blinking, but now I am feeling guilt, regret, and hurt even though I am not meant to. I don't understand it, so I can not possibly expect you to. So, just try to grasp what I'm saying, Sara. Love, I can not sit here and tell you that I am okay when I know that there is so much more to it. I'm not okay. I'm not bad either. I'm broken, but I'm starting to see that I was made that way. I was probably never fixed or whole to start with. Sara, I'm not meant for this. I am not someone who gets to just settle down and have a family of my own. I'm a monster. I'm a demon, and I'm always going to hurt you, Haillie, and Ava in the end. Maybe it's just better if I play the role I am supposed to play. I'll be the villain, you humans will be the victims, and the hunters will always win. I need to just admit that I need to be what I am. I am the King of Hell. I torture, murder, and scare, and I Crowley enjoy it all," Crowley admits wholeheartedly to his love, his Sara.
Sara stammers, "Are you saying that you aren't going to stay here?"
"I'm saying goodbye, Sara. You can have the house, the kids, the life you always wanted. Find someone else to do it with," Crowley bluntly says letting her go out of his arms. He snaps and his bags of clothes appear. "Goodbye, love." Crowley snaps again, and he is at his office, in Hell with all of his stuff.