"Ma'am. The whole point of this place is for people to be alone with their thoughts. No interruptions during their contemplation."

They'd been going back and forth for at least fifteen minutes and nothing seemed to work. Olivia decided to come at the nun from a different side. "Please. Just let me see her? Make sure she's okay?"

The nun seemed to be inspecting Olivia's molecular structure. "And then, once you're inside, you'll talk to her anyway."

Olivia didn't pause, "Yes."

"It's that important?"

"Yes."

The nun closed her eyes for a moment and Olivia was convinced she was going to get another no. She was stumped about what else she could say that would persuade the nun, and she was stunned when the other woman opened her eyes and nodded. "I will let you see her, talk to her, if she agrees to it."

Olivia inclined her head, "Thank you sister."

The sister raised one eyebrow, then shook her head, "Don't thank me yet Ms. Spencer. Your friend hasn't said yes."

Natalia had said yes and was sitting under a tree on the other side of the garden area. But Olivia found she couldn't move towards the tree or the woman. She had fallen into the same pattern she always did. Fall for one, then break that one's heart with another. She had spiced things up a bit since they were both women, but she had lived up to every bad word Frank had thrown at her in the hospital. She was stuck.

Finally she shook her head. She was Olivia Spencer. Even when she was screwing up lives left and right, she took her lumps and kept on fighting. She started over towards the tree, and squared her shoulders as she got there. The younger woman stood, they hugged, and both sat again.

They were silent, holding each other's hands tightly. They both started speaking at the same time.

"Natalia."

"Olivia."

Olivia gave a gentle smile, "You first."

Natalia took her hand from Olivia so she could worry at the hem of her shirt with both hands. "I'm pregnant."

The smile disappeared. "From your time with Frank." Olivia wasn't asking a question. "Are you okay? It's been almost..." Olivia frowned and lifted Natalia's chin with two fingers so the younger woman had to look at her. "Are you and... and... she, he, okay?"

"Them." Olivia blinked in surprise as she took a hold of Natalia's hand again. "I know, super fertile Natalia Rivera. I could be a Marvel mutant. Yes, we're all fine, and I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry."

Olivia shook her head, "You have nothing to be sorry about Natalia. When you and..." She stopped and restarted, "At that point in time, neither of us was in a good place, and we were nowhere near being anything but friends."

Natalia shook her head, "Not about me and Frank. I'm sorry that I ran away. I'm sorry that I lied about..."

Olivia cut Natalia off, "You didn't lie..."

"Please Olivia I..."

Olivia shook her head. It was her turn to avert her eyes. She watched as across the garden three older women set up to do some yoga. "Please don't apologize to me Natalia. Mine... mine is so much worse."

It was Natalia's turn to frown, "Liv?"

Olivia pulled her gaze away from the yoga nuns and back to Natalia. She could do it. She was Olivia 'freaking' Spencer, conqueror of men, big businesswoman in Springfield. "I cheated."

"With Josh. I know that you two kissed. Then you pushed him away and left on your own..."

Olivia tilted her head to one side, "Do you have a direct input to the traffic cams?" Olivia gently turned Natalia's head from side to side, "Where's the jack? How do you plug in?"

Natalia batted Olivia's hands away and both women gave the other a bit more room on the bench. "Will you tell me?"

Olivia swiped at her eyes and took a deep breath, "I... I wish..."

Natalia spoke quietly, "It won't work. We won't work. That's what I've realized here."

Their eyes met and silence fell again. They both stared off at anything but the other person.

Olivia was about to speak when a choked sob came from Natalia. Olivia scootched over and hugged Natalia to her. They younger woman curled into Olivia and the sobs came and came. Olivia didn't know how long they sat just like that. Natalia's tears soaking through Olivia's shirt while the hotel owner rubbed circles on Natalia's back.

Finally Natalia slowly sat up and wiped at her eyes, "I... I don't want to do this alone again. I... I can't."

"You won't."

"What?"

Olivia stood, but only went as far as the tree. Natalia turned on the bench and waited. It was always best to let Olivia have her space, pushing only brought out Olivia's fight or flight response. And usually Olivia chose fight. It wasn't too long until Olivia turned and spoke, "We've been through a lot. We're best friends. I mean, we were at least. I've never... never really had a real best friend, and I love you, but..."

"Since my aborted wedding it's been all weird and..."

"...uncomfortable."

Olivia nodded and ran her hand along the tree's bark. "I do love you and I would do anything for you." She continued in a rush. "It wasn't the sex, I swear on Gus' heart it wasn't."

Natalia stood and joined Olivia at the tree. "I know. I thought that I could. I'm not ready for any sex, not just not ready for... you know. I don't know if I will ever be ready. And, I realized, ever since I arrived in Springfield I've been going from one person who takes care of me and Rafe to another. Gus, Frank, you."

"Will you..."

Natalia cut Olivia off, "I don't love Frank, I never did. No matter what happens with us, it won't change that fact. Guilt isn't a good basis for a relationship or a marriage, neither are children."

Olivia put a hand on Natalia's lower abdomen, "But you two will be forever connected."

Natalia covered Olivia's hand with her own, "I know. but I'm not a teenager, I'm..."

Olivia smirked, "Older."

Natalia narrowed her eyes, "Yes." She paused, "Are you're sure that it wasn't..."

Olivia held three fingers up, "I swear, girl scout honor, it's not the sex. I..."

Natalia nodded, "Doris."

Olivia's head snapped up, "How did you?"

A small smile came to Natalia's lips despite the gravity of the conversation, "I'm plugged in, remember?"

"Natalia..."

"Sorry. But you two flirt like bees and pollen."

"I flirt with everyone."

"I know. But with her. She likes you too you know."

Olivia didn't look convinced, "I doubt it."

"Then why did you get involved with her. You were willing to break up what we may have had for her. You're telling me that you just did it for fun?"

Olivia sighed, "Why did I cheat with her... because a wise woman I know taught me that sometimes you have to put yourself out there even if you don't know the end result. Sometimes you have to have faith. Of course, I'm pretty sure that this woman didn't quite have this situation in mind."

"Wise huh?"

Olivia shrugged and squawked a 'hey' as Natalia gave her shoulder a push, "What? What did I say?"

Natalia shook her head, "Can we go home?"

Olivia put out her hand and Natalia gripped it. They pulled each other into a hug. Over Natalia's shoulder Olivia met the eyes of the sister who had let her in. Olivia mouthed 'Thank you' and the sister gave a nod in response.

The two women parted, "Let's go home. I'm under direct orders to find and bring you back to Springfield post haste."

Natalia chuckled, "Emma..." Her look sobered, "Emma..."

"Natalia, do you truly believe that Em would ever let me yank her from your life or you from hers?"

"No."

"She'd just runaway." Natalia winced, "Then I'd have to ground her and she'd be all moody and pre-teeny and eventually just try to run away again."

Natalia quirked her eyebrows, "So you're cutting out the middleman?"

Olivia smiled, "So... now that our relationship is nice and simple. Best Fr..."

An unladylike snort escaped Natalia's nose. She covered it, "Simple? Olivia, nothing with you is ever simple."

"Do I get to finish my sentence?"

"I don't think an elite commando team could get past Sister Mary and Sister Edith. Do you plan to tell me how you got in here?"

Olivia shrugged, "Probably not."

"Then I'm not sure that you'll get to finish your sentence."

"Now that..."

Natalia interrupted as promised, "We're like, Izzy and George. Well, before their current situations..."

Olivia squinted at Natalia. "Who, what? George who?"

"They made better friends than lovers. Well, until Izzy went crazy with skin cancer and the writers seemed to forget that George even existed."

They stopped in front of Olivia's car. "What are you talking about?"

Natalia studied Olivia, "Right, you don't like the primetime soap-y stuff. Hmm... okay. Bev and Jean-Luc. You like Star Trek right?"

"Shush, shush woman, shush..." Olivia glanced around the parking lot as if Ninjas were going to jump from the shadows at any moment. "Yes. Fine, yes, what is your point Natalia Rivera?"

"They never get together, Bev is married, then under Jean-Luc's command with all that angst. At one point they almost get there, but like us, it's just not meant to be. You're ready. I'm not, and I'm not sure if I'll ever be. And, as much as you say differently, if you settle for no sex, just kisses, hugs, and our friendship, you'll wind up hating me."

Olivia spoke quietly, "They got together in the Post Nemesis books."

Natalia threaded an arm through Olivia's. "So, we go our own way for seven seasons. You meet a piano player, then get to decide whether to send her to her death, and then you get lucky on every planet in every movie. I'll just meet a Dax who has no spots and seems to need more hosts than socks. Maybe it'll work out with us. But, right now, you need to see if you and Doris work, because when you talk about her now, and maybe even a little before, you light up. And I... I need to become my own person. Be on my own for a while, find where the heck I left my own wings."

She paused, "Maybe one of these days it will be our time, or maybe we'll be..."

"BFFs?"

Natalia gave Olivia a push on the shoulder, but Olivia hadn't been ready for it and Natalia watched in horror as Olivia flailed backwards and landed butt first in a giant mud puddle.

She sat there in the puddle and shook her head, "Think this is a bad sign?"

"You know what?" She braced herself against the car so Olivia wouldn't be able to pull her in the mud puddle and yanked Olivia to her feet. Olivia dabbed a bit of mud on Natalia's nose. Natalia looked cross eyed at the dab or earth. "I don't think I believe in signs anymore." She wiped off the mud. "And no religion is going to tell me who I should make my family ever again."

"Natalia."

She held a hand up, "I'm not giving up my faith or turning my back on it. But Father Ray is not going to be my priest any longer. I'll find a new place to worship, one where I feel comfortable again."

Olivia wiped her hand on the side of her white car and unlocked the passenger door. "Your chariot awaits."

"Home, and real life." Olivia nodded and Natalia frowned, "What were you going to ask me?"

Olivia slid into the driver's seat with a squish. She winced at the thought of what was happening to her seats, then spoke, "Ah, right. Just wondered if you wanted your job back."

"Olivia Spencer, you can no longer afford me."

Olivia laughed as she pulled out of the parking lot.