Frozen in Ink
Chapter 5- A Part of You
"Something is scratching its way out. Something you want to forget about...
A part of you that'll never show, you're the only one that'll ever know."
- The Fray (Little House)
The Next Day
The bed is empty, which by now shouldn't bother her so much. But after being married to someone for eight years you get use to it. Haley ran her hand over the empty side of the bed and sighed. She missed him but then again she didn't. What he did killed her inside. He slept with someone else in their bed, in this bed, and that was like a dagger in her heart. Haley got up and looked over at the clock. She'd have to wake up Jamie and get him ready for school. It was hard being a single parent, even if Haley had only been doing it "alone" for a few weeks. It was just like before, when Nathan was in his alcoholic phase, she did it alone then too. When Jamie was first born they worked together, but after Nathan's accident he was the never the same. Jamie looked up to Lucas, when Nathan couldn't be there for him. She thought it was getting better, until she found the sin on her bed sheets. Haley pulled her robe on, "Jamie! Time to get up!" She called. Today was a new day, just another day without her husband.
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Peyton sat in the passenger seat of Brooke's SUV twiddling her thumbs. It was a nervous habit of hers, when they were in high school Lucas would always laugh at her before an exam when she'd sit there and chomp on a pen, just another nervous habit. The car was in a pharmacy parking lot on the outskirts of Tree Hill. Brooke was buying Peyton a pregnancy test. The fact was that if she honestly was pregnant she didn't know what she was going to do. Nathan was in love with Haley, even though their marriage was broken up, there was a chance they could reconcile. But if Peyton was having Nathan's baby than that chance diminished. It wasn't that Peyton didn't want to have the baby, if their even was one, because it was a piece of her. The only thing that bothered her was that she couldn't imagine raising a baby with anyone but Luke, which was wrong, considering he was married. Nathan was married too, which made her sleeping with him, also very wrong. She was going to hell. "Hey. P, anyone up there?" Brooke said closing the door and settling into the drivers seat. "Yeah, sorry Brooke." Peyton said shaking her head. Brooke handed her a clear plastic bag. "Ready? Need anything else while we're here?" "I'm good…this is it… uh thanks Brooke." Brooke started the car and they drove away.
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Since Lucas had seen Peyton at the river court last night he couldn't stop thinking about what she said. "I still love you." After everything, all that hurt and pain that he'd caused her, she still loved him. He blew the whistle in his mouth, ending morning practices for the Varsity basketball team. "Good, run guys. Head to the locker room." He said clapping his hands. The boys of the team all rushed into the locker room and he stood in the middle of the floor remembering Peyton. Skills walked over to him collecting basketballs and placing them into the cart. "Hey Luke..." Lucas trailed out of his day dreams. "What's up Skills?" "Nothing Dog, you just seem kind of out in space." Lucas shook his head trying to get Peyton out of his mind, he was married to Lindsey now, and he loved Lindsey. "I'm just thinking about our game on Saturday. I think we can stick it to Madison." "Hell yeah." Skills said laughing a deep laugh. "I don't know what were going to do with Fields, Quite honestly." Lucas added. Then his thoughts went to basketball but even those thoughts weren't Peyton free.
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Lindsey sat in Washington Square Park, it wasn't her favorite haunt in the city or anything but she found it so much more peaceful than Central Park. Most people sat on benches reading books, sipping coffee, and keeping to themselves. Not too many tourists hit this spot to ask for directions or how far they were from Times Square. It was just quiet. Lindsey could no longer sit in her office anymore. It was obvious to most of her co-workers that she and Lucas had gotten into to fight. What kind of crazy woman comes into work two weeks after they get married? There was a lot of memorabilia all over her office walls from Lucas's first book. That was worse than her co-workers noisy questions or her boss's sympathetic stare. In the novel he said he would always be in love with Peyton Sawyer. She knew it was true, she even routed for them, but Lindsey never thought she'd fall in love with Lucas Scott either. She had once read that when people love each other someone always loves more than the other. Lindsey loved Lucas more than he could possible love her, especially since she knew his heart was in some regards still Peyton's. It didn't matter that he'd promised her forever, he promised it to Peyton first. Lindsey brushed her hair out of her eyes and saw a young woman reading Lucas's first book, The Unkindness of Ravens. She saw the girls eyes were welled up with tears and she wondered where she was at in the novel. While editing the book she herself cried a lot, she would never have an epic love story like Lucas and Peyton's, even if she married him. Lindsey got up off the park bench and walked toward the subway, she knew what she had to do. The only thing that paraded her mind was with Luke and Peyton who loved more? Honestly, that was a million dollar question, because to Lucas's wife, it seemed to be about 50/50.
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Brooke knocked on the bathroom door as she rested her head against the door frame. "P?" Peyton sat on the toilet feet crossed with the little plastic wand in between her legs. "I can't Brooke." Peyton yelled as she began to have tears come down her eyes. "Peyton, you have to." Peyton shook her head. "No, No, No! I can't go. I don't want to know. Brooke I can't pee on this damn stick because then it'll be real." "Let me in, babe." Brooke said sweetly. Peyton reached over and unlatched the lock. Brooke walked in and Peyton's eyes were glassy, her hair combed over to the side. Brooke hadn't seen her like this since she'd come back home to Tree Hill. "P, you have…" "Right now I can't physically go." Peyton's head was so full she couldn't imagine knowing that something that big was going to happen in her life, something so life changing. "How about I get you some Sunny D?" Peyton looked at her. "Very funny, nice way to lighten the mood." "I do try Peyt." Peyton took a deep breath and sniffled. "I can do this." Brooke nodded. "You can do anything." Brooke reached out and touched grabbed Peyton's free hand. Peyton let go and finally the urine came out of her body and on to the test. She counted to ten and removed it away from her body and on to the counter, careful not to hit Brooke with it. Peyton continued to relieve her bladder and then sighed. "Three minutes?" Brooke asked Peyton as she buckled her jeans back up. "Three minutes." And then the best friends waited.
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James Lucas Scott was not a stupid kid, in fact, he knew that something fishy was going on in his parents' marriage for a while, even if no one said anything. He didn't understand exactly what was going on, but for a five year old he was pretty aware, he heard their arguments for one, and remembers when Haley caught Nanny Carrie and Nathan taking a nap together. After that night Nanny Carrie didn't come back to watch him anymore and Nathan had to sleep on the couch and burn the sheets on his and Jamie's mother's bed. He didn't want to upset his mother, who now spent her night's crying herself to sleep, by asking where his father was. But Jamie really wanted to play basketball and visit with The Ravens. His mother hadn't said much just that, His daddy had to go away for a little while but that didn't mean that daddy didn't love him any less. Jamie wanted nothing more than to play basketball like his father. But because his mom was so upset he didn't want to ask her if he join the local rec team. One of the big fifth graders asked him to join on the smaller kids teams because he was a Scott after all. So Jamie waited outside of his school, feet swinging back and forth as he sat on the bench waiting for his mama, he was nervous to ask her, but he wasn't afraid to either. That wasn't the Scott way.
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The river court was his favorite place in the whole world. There were so many good memories here, that he couldn't let them go. Lucas bounced the basketball and tried to shoot it in at the three point line. He missed, again. "Come on, Scott!" He whipped his head around to see Haley, she was dressed in a white sweater, dark jeans, and a pair of ballet flats. "Hi, Hales!" Haley walked over to him, her hands dug deep into her pockets. "I thought you were picking up Jamie." "I was," She answered. "But Nathan said he wanted to do it." "Oh okay." Lucas answered and started dribbling the ball in between his legs. "Talked to Lindsey?" She asked shrugging her shoulders. "Talked to Nathan?" "Yes," Luke stared her down. "Okay, not really." Haley receives the basketball from a bounce pass from Lucas. "Is she mad about The Comet?" She asked passing the ball back to him. "I don't know. I guess, I mean she directly quoted it." "Oh wow." Haley said, trying to shoot the ball into the hop. "What Haley?" "Can you blame her Lucas? I've read it. It's another love letter to Peyton." Lucas shook his head. "It's a story, Haley." "About Peyton," She shot back. "So, Peyton drives a comet?" Haley looked at him again, unable to believe he could ignore his heart. "And the story is about how after the so called comet comes back into your life, you are whole again. You wrote this after Peyton got back to town." "Haley, Peyton is my past. I love Lindsey." Haley started to bounce the ball again. "I do not doubt that, but Lucas listen to me, you still have feelings for Peyton or you wouldn't have hesitated when you were saying your vows to Lindsey." Lucas couldn't believe that Haley realized that. When he stood up on that podium he thought of Peyton and how much he really missed her. "I'm your best friend Lucas. I know you better than you think." She said smiling at him. "The story is about Peyton." He breathed out and shot the ball into the hoop, he made it this time. "I already knew that." Haley said matter of factly. "But I love Lindsey. I made the right choice. Peyton and me no matter how hard we both tired it wasn't meant to be. She said no, remember?" Haley linked arms with Lucas. "I know, Lucas." She lied and they walked off of the court.
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"Daddy!" Jamie yelled excitedly as he saw his father walk up the sidewalk towards where he was sitting. "Hey Jim-Jam. I missed you." Jamie jumped into his arms. "I missed you too, Daddy." Nathan ran his hands through his son's hair and kissed his scalp. "So, how would you like to come with me to Uncle Luke's? We can play rock band?" Nathan said as the two pulled apart. "Okay. Are we walking or driving?" Jamie asked taking his father's hand. "Walking." Nathan said smiling. The two walked down the street and both father and son were really happy, they missed each other a lot. "Daddy?" "Hmm." "Do you think I'll be a good basketball player?" Nathan smiled. "I know you will be." "A boy at school asked me if I wanted to play rec league. You think Mama will let me do it?" Nathan was unsure. Who knew what Haley would say? "I don't know, son. But how bout this, I'll talk to her about it." Jamie nodded and they reached Lucas's house. "Dad, are you ready to get your butt kicked at guitar?" "No way!" Nathan said laughing and the two boys ran into Luke's house.
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Lindsey stood in the security line at JFK airport. She kept all the paperwork she needed in a manila folder in her purse and kept a strong determined look on her face. She had to go back to Tree Hill. As she entered boarding she thought of her husband, and the kind of man he was. She sighed, grabbed her carry on and boarded a plane to Tree Hill, North Carolina.
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In three minutes you can do a lot of things. You can download a song, type a few words, sign some documents, put peanut butter on your sandwich, or even find out what your future holds for you. Peyton Sawyer was doing just that, finding out what the rest of her life was going to mean for her. It was daunting, those three minutes she spent waiting for a result to the pregnancy test. Especially when your gut is flipping all around, you feel sick to your stomach, and the baby isn't the person's who you love most in the world. Brooke held her hand, as they waited. They just sat on the counter top, didn't speak, just sat and waited. It felt like forever, "Oh my god." Peyton whispered. Then those two little pink lines showed up, it felt a hell of a lot more surreal and terrifying than anything in the world. The test read positive. In three minutes the world can come crashing down
TBC
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A/N: I really hope you liked this chapter. I think this chapter is my longest yet, and was originally planned to be much longer but I spilt it in two. I made a few little references in my writing and I'm just going to go ahead and tell you what they are. When Lindsey is sitting in the park, she's talking about how she read that when people love each other someone always loves more than the other. I got that from a book I've read. It's called Mercy by Jodi Picout. I love her books, and I'm reading that book now and it kind of just popped into my head. Also when Peyton is about to take the pregnancy test, Brooke asks if she wants some Sunny D. That's from Juno. In the beginning she had like 2 gallons so she could pee. I hope you weren't grossed out by that scene but it had to be written. Ha-ha. I still been getting a few more comments about the format and I apologize for that a billion times over. While I was writing this and [the previous chapters] I was using a different view and also I just put the automatic lines in but they didn't show up. Hopefully this looks better and you can keep up. :D About the italics, well previously I had a story up and the quotations weren't showing up for whatever reason, so I just go in the habit of putting it in italics. If that really bothers you then by chapter ten I can stop that, but until then it'll just take too much time. [sorry] For all of you who knew Peyton was going to get pregnant, my bad. I realize I was a little to obvious in previous chapters, but I had to save that result for last. I just had to. All of those places that Lindsey was at are in New York. I've never been but I can attest they are a lot like what I said they were. I hope. Please Review, Make me feel good. :D
-Kelsey