Authors' Note- I'll probably do a few more chapters, and then maybe a sequel or two...
Anyhoo, Enjoy this chapter!
Chapter 17.
Nate.
I knock on her door. I spent the whole drive over here thinking of what the most bad-ass woman alive could need my help with.
I'm sure it's nothing, maybe an old case?
She opens the door, and I see her standing in the glow of her apartment lights in an FBI jumper, and plaid pyjama bottoms. Only she could make a over-sized jumper and bedclothes look sexy.
"Come in, come in." She says as she ushers me inside. I see that she has her Glock in hand- definitely not her service weapon.
She quickly fastens her deadbolts and chain-lock, and turns around to face me. Her hair is half dry, as if she got out of the shower just before she called me.
"What's going on, A.J.?" I ask.
She sighs and places her weapon on the side table beside her couch.
"I need your help, and I didn't know who else to call." She says, and only then do I notice the smudged mascara and reddened complexion. She'd been crying.
I instinctively take a step towards her, and place my hands on her shoulders.
"Are you okay?"
"No. No, I'm not."
"What can I do?"
"I need to talk to someone. I thought of you because you're my partner, and a psychologist. Maybe you can help me with this."
"I'm here to listen, partner."
She looked up at me. Her head had to go all the way back to be able to see my face. Her sad eyes meet mine, and I see the faintest hint of a smile.
"Sit. I have to tell you the story from the beginning."
Wondering what she meant, I sit down on her red fabric couch, my back resting against a black blanket.
"Okay," she paused and took a deep breath, "I've never told anyone outside my family this, it's personal. But I trust that this'll stay between us?"
"Of course." I say. "Take your time."
She took another cleansing breath, as if she was bracing herself for what's to come.
"When I was twenty-eight, I was just finishing college, and I was preparing to move from Boston to Virginia. At the time, I was dating this guy, Michael. He'd agreed to move with me to D.C, and we had found a lovely apartment just outside of the city. Three weeks after moving, I found out I was pregnant."
She pauses, appearing to fight back tears.
"When I told Michael, he'd been over the moon, and so had I. We had been dating for almost 10 years, and we had talked about getting married and having a family a while before that."
She smiles slightly, reminising of a happier time.
"We couldn't have been more in love. The minute I told him I was pregnant, he got down on one knee and proposed. He said he would take me out the next day and buy me the biggest diamond ring we could find."
She slowly sits up straighter.
"We spent the next five months happily engaged and pregnant. We kept arguing about baby names and cribs..." She trailed off.
"One night, I woke to sharp abdominal pains. Michael rushed me to the hospital, but our baby..."
She couldn't fight the tears anymore, and she just let them fall. At a loss of what to do, I shuffled closer to her, and put my arm around her.
"It's okay, A.J. You don't have to tell me."
I inhale her fresh scent, like citrus and the ocean.
"B-But I do." She says through sobs.
She regained her composure and continued the story.
"After I miscarried, Michael started drinking. A lot. He'd come home drunk and scream at me and push me around. He'd tell me that is was my fault for losing his kid."
She paused.
"One night, he came back from the bar and found me packing a bag. He asked me what I was doing and I said I was leaving. I was going to see my sister for the weekend. He said he didn't believe me. He thought I was leaving him. We fought, but he was much stronger than I was and..." She trailed off.
"He shot me. I don't know how he got my gun, but he shot me. Right here." She placed her hand just to the right of her heart.
"The bullet missed my heart by millimeters, but breached my pericardium. My neighbours heard the shots, and the paramedics took me away."
She stopped and wiped her eyes, still wet from tears.
"I woke days later in a hospital, with Lucy and my mother by my side. The doctor said I was lucky to be alive. I didn't return to the FBI until 6 years later, and by then Michael was in prison, and I was getting on with my life."
"Why bring this all up now?" I ask.
"I got a call today. He's being let out on good behaviour in two weeks. Nate, he's the reason I took this job. He kept calling me saying he wished he aimed for my head."
Her head fell into her hands.
"I loved him, Nate. But now...I'm afraid he'll kill me and everyone I love. My friends. My family. My team."
She looks up at me.
"I don't know how to deal with him. I have a restraining order against him. But that's not gonna stop him for long. I don't want anyone to die all because I couldn't keep a baby alive."
"Hey, It's not your fault. You didn't kill your baby. You didn't mean for it to die."
"But-"
"No buts. It's. Not. Your. Fault."
She looks up at me. Her eyes are captivating. Her skin is so pale. Her lips are so red.
Her expression is calm and serene. Beautiful.
"Thanks for listening, partner." She says, not moving her gaze from mine.
With every passing silent second, our faces get closer and closer together. Our lips are millimeters apart when the doorbell rings.
Her head snaps around to the door. Her finger presses to her lips as she leaps across the room. She grabs her weapon, and instantly it becomes an extention of her body. Her side presses up against the door as she looks through the peephole.
She lowers her weapon, unlocks the deadbolt, and opens the door. On the other side was none other than Henrietta Lange.
"Hetty?" A.J asks. "What are you doing here?"
"I got a phonecall from your sister not long ago, Ms. Connors. She informed me that Michael Sanders is being released from prison. I came by to check if you were all right." She pauses, her gaze shifting to me. "I was going to suggest you talk to Mr. Getz, but I see you have beat me to the punch. Good evening, Mr. Getz."
"Evening, Hetty." I say, trying to disguise my surprise that I had almost kissed my partner.
"I'm fine now I've talked to Nate. Thanks for checking up on me, Hetty, but you didn't have to come all the way across town to see me."
"Nonsense! I was in the neighbourhood." She says.
A.J nods in acknowledgement.
"Since I see you're doing fine, I'll be on my way. Good night, and I'll see you two Monday." Hetty waves as she turns out onto the street, and climbs into her Jag.
A.J closes the door and slowly locks the door. She runs a hand through her now-dry hair, and sits beside me on the couch.
"Well, um..." I begin.
She laughs and says, "Um... What almost happened?"
"I think we almost kissed." I say back, followed by a laugh.
"Yeah..." She laughs awkwardly. "That was...um..."
"We should never speak of this again."
"Exactly."
"Unless..." I say sarcastically. Or not.
She punches me in the arm. "Nate!" She says playfully.
"What?!" I laugh. "A guy can dream, can't he?"
She smiles a real, genuine smile. And then a soft laugh.
"We're partners."
"Partners."
"Yeah."
"Well...I guess I better go, call me if you need me."
"Yeah, thanks, Nate. I really needed you tonight."
"Anytime."
Even if the night is exactly like this one, I would take it, because almost kissing you, is as close to you as I need to get.