Silent Angel:

Blame:

"How'd it go?" John asked after Dean walked through the door.

"It went good" Dean said, when he turned around his brother and father exchanged looks. Dean had the biggest smile on his face that he had worn in years.

"What happened to you?" Sam asked with a giggle.

"I asked Castiel out; he said yes" Dean admitted.

"That's great" Sam smiled, "see, I told you, you wanted him."

"Yeah, you were right. Just this once though!" Dean said ruffling his brothers hair. "I'm going to go upstairs."

"To be?" his father was surprised.

"No. I just, I want to be alone for a while. Relax" Dean explained walking up the stairs. He shut his bedroom door behind him and sighed, lovingly. Hand moving to his lips. He could still fell them tingling from the kiss. It was the best kiss Dean had ever had. The first kiss him and Castiel shared as a couple and it was perfect. Soft, sweet and full of love. The way a kiss should be. He needed to help Castiel deal with his issues and he would do anything to help him.

Castiel layed on his bed, he couldn't wipe the smile off his face. He was so happy. He finally had Dean Winchester, all to himself. He could hold his hand, hug him and kiss him when ever he wanted. Dean Winchester had broken down his walls, Castiel knew he should have let someone in years ago but he was afraid to, Dean got to Cas without even trying. It was like Castiel's walls just broke. As if they knew Dean would get in anyway so they just gave in. Castiel was glad he let Dean in, if Dean never got to him then they would never had go together.

"Hey there Cassie" Came Gabriel's voice from the door way, "sorry about date crashing." Castiel nodded.

"You had fun though?"

"Ys"

"I'm proud of you" Gabriel smiled, "you know for learning to talk, I think Dean just might be good for, you. I'll let you sleep, good night."

"How does he look?" Micheal asked as Gabriel passed him.

"In a word? Happy" Gabriel smiled, "I think Dean is good him. His making him better."

"Yeah" Micheal sighed, "I guess I was wrong about that guy. Go to bed" Micheal patted him on the shoulder and walked over to sit on Castiel's bed. "Hey, Castiel. I was wondering, did you want to have Dean over for dinner, one day?"

"Ys" Castiel answered, his eyes still closed.

"Monday?"

"Ys"

"Ok. I'll give him a call. I'm proud of you, Castiel -" before he could finish, Castiel had thrown his arms around him. It had been years since Castiel had hugged him first. Micheal almost cried at Castiel movement. "Yeah, yeah, your welcome." Micheal said letting his arms hold his baby brother. "It's been seven years since you've hugged me. It's good to have you back, Cas. Where have you been?"

Castiel chuckled.

"I'll let you sleep. I'll call Dean tomorrow, make sure it's cool with him; see you in the morning." Micheal let Castiel go and walked out the room.

Castiel had his first, full nights rest in 10 years. No nightmare and he slept all night, Micheal had to wake him up for the first time in 10 years.

"Castiel, wake up. It's 10 in the afternoon" came Micheal's voice in his ear. "I feel stupid for asking, I mean, I know what you're going to say. You haven't gone there for ten years but I have to ask. Me and Anna were going to go to Dad and Mum's graves. Did you want to come too?"

"Ys" Castiel nodded,

"Ok. Get up, get dressed, get your shoe's on. We'll go when your ready" Micheal was surprised. Castiel was changing but in a good way.

"This is a big step for him so, we need to be sensitive" Anna said sternly, remember how long it took you to go to his grave?"

"Of corse I do" Micheal said sharply.

"I was the only one who went for years. If it's was hard for you, imagine how hard it must be for him. Try not to force him into anything. He might come with us, he might want to get out the car, he might want to enter the cemetery, he might not even want to see the grave. We have to be carful!"

"I know" Micheal whispered, turning towards Castiel's door, "you ready?"

Castiel stepped out and followed them to the car. The car was silent as they drove. Anna didn't trust Micheal to drive them to the grave, since last time he did he just ended up driving to a steak house instead. Anna lived on the rules of 'driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cake hole. No exceptions!' And this was not the kind of time she wanted to listen to Lady Gaga or whatever kids were listening to these days.

Castiel tried not to remember what his father did to him. After all, their dad didn't really know what he was doing. So, I wasn't really his fault, was it? Castiel thought it was about time to forgive him; it had been 7 years since then after all. Castiel didn't usually hold grudges, but for some reason what his father did to him, he just couldn't let go. Castiel shouldn't have caught the flue. If he was healthy he would have gone to school and his dad wouldn't have been able to do that to him, would he?

"Cas" Micheal said, bring the distant Castiel back to earth. "We're here." Castiel noticed Micheal was at the door, letting him out. Castiel followed quietly behind his oldest brother and sister.

"Do you think his alright" he heard Anna whisper,

"You said this is harder for him than it was for me when I first came here. So of corse his not, alright" Micheal answered, treating like she was stupid.

"Ok. Jeeze, I was just wondering if he was ok" Anna backed off instantly and waisted to Castiel to catch up.

"Hey, Cas" she said putting a hand on her shoulder. "Did you wanna put fresh flowers down?" She offered him the flowers she brough from the flower store on the way over. Castiel shoved the flowers away.

"A simple no would have been fine" she turned her face up a little, but brightened up when she saw Micheal's 'give it a rest' face.

"Castiel, I'm proud of you for coming today, you know that right?" Micheal questioned; putting an arm around Castiel's shoulders.

Castiel just nodded. He would have spoke but if his father's grave was here, he believe his father might hear him and he didn't want to give him the privilege of hearing his voice. They stopped in front of his fathers grave.

'Chuck Novak.' It read.

Castiel couldn't help but feel a little bit guilty, he never got to say his dad's name or even call him dad. He felt like it was partly his fault for not trying harder sooner. 'Should have tried, harder!' he said to himself in his head, 'should have tried to learn alone, even when everyone gave up. Should have kept trying!'

They stood there for a few minutes in silence.

"Come on" Anna said after a while. "I'll stop off at a burger joint on the way back.'

"I'll buy" Micheal insisted leading Castiel away.

Micheal knew how hard it must have been for Castiel to go there. Everyone attended their fathers funeral beside him and Cas. Anna was the only one who went on the first anniversary of his death. But until that day every besides Castiel had been. When Micheal first went, he didn't drive there. He was going to but backed out and drove to 'Johnny's beef house' instead, Anna had to trick him to get him to go. Micheal didn't say anything to his dad, he refused to put flowers down.

Micheal felt guilty too. 'Castiel's my little brother.' He would tell himself. 'Castiel is the youngest. I should have protected him. I should have stayed home. I should have been the one getting cut up, no him. Why was I so selfish. I should have stayed. I should have forced dad to go to work, I should have helped Castiel get better. I should have gotten Dad some help.'

He blamed himself for years. They both did. But it wasn't anyone's fault. No one was to blame. Their mum go sick, that wasn't anyone's fault. Even though they would deny it if it was brought up, deep down, they both still thought they were to blame.