A/N:

Sorries for the long update wait! I've been super busy. Homecoming, perfectionism, school, social life, etc. I need to work harder in school though. I only got a 3.6 D":

Disclaimer: It's a disclaimer. What else is there to say?

Chapter Seven: Rain

When I stirred, masculine arms tightened around me.

For a second, I tensed. I'd been away from this sensation for so long, it didn't seem normal anymore. I peeked one eye open to see Deidara's vibrant blue ones staring back at me.

"Awake, love?" he chuckled softly as he ruffled my hair.

"Yup," I sighed, my voice rough from sleep. I wiggled to close the small gap between us so I could wrap my arms around him and rest my head on his chest.

He complied, more than willing.

"What do you think the chances are that we could just stay like this all day?" I asked.

"Depends on what… recreations… Kisame and Itachi were up to last night." He answered with his signature smirk.

"Deidara?" I asked quietly.

"Hmm?"

"How long… do you think I…" I couldn't finish my sentence because my chest was already tightening with silent sobs.

"Shh," Deidara covered my mouth with his. His hands ran through my hair gently. "It's okay, Sakura. Don't think about it right now."

I nodded. I could do that.

He kissed me once more.

"We probably should get up, though." He sighed.

I sighed. "Should."

He chuckled gently. "Come on," he said as he pulled us out of the old bed to retrieve our clothes.

After the little scavenger hunt, we dressed quickly and left the room.

Kisame and Itachi hadn't had as much fun as we had last night, evidently; they were already sitting at the dusty table, sipping at black coffee.

Where they got it, I had no idea.

Already, I felt a slight layer of depression falling over me.

I knew this couldn't last forever, and that it would be hard enough to get my village to trust me again. Running off with an S-ranked criminal wasn't exactly the pinnacle of good citizenship.

In my defense, I had been knocked out when they took me, but my chakra hadn't been blocked, nor was I under any restraint.

I could be charged for treason.

It could put Deidara at the top of Konoha's hit list.

I stood.

Deidara looked up at me and in an instant read on my face what I was thinking. "Sakura,"

"I can't stay, Deidara. I'm so sorry. I love you so much."

I was too fast for him. I was already out the window before he made a move to stop me. It'd take him a minute or two to mold a bird, and I could find a hiding spot and mask my chakra by then.

My pace was slowed minutely by the tears that escaped my eyes.

As soon as I saw a decent cave in the light woodland, I stopped.

I masked my chakra completely before going in.

The thing hardly deserved to be called a cave, actually, but it'd do.

I curled up in the back corner, hardly big enough for me, and cried.

I cried for my love of an S-ranked criminal, I cried for the hopelessness of it, I cried for his love for me, I cried for everything.

Soon, I drifted into an uneasy sleep.

I woke up to the patter of rain. I sighed in annoyance; this cave was slightly tilted downwards, so the rain would seep in.

At least rain meant Deidara couldn't fly with any efficiency.

I knew now that if I really loved him, I should stay away. Being close to him would only cause danger for both of us.

Deep down, it hurt. It felt like I'd had my heart ripped out, still beating. I knew, instinctively somehow, that this pain would never go away.

I also knew that I'd never be able to love anyone else.

Making a sacrifice like this was painful, but it was for the better.

The rain was already beginning to flood the cave. I had to leave.

I felt no need to run. He'd probably given up by now. Still, I didn't let my chakra leak.

I trudged through the rain, thanking it for hiding the fact that I was crying.

I felt a flare of familiar chakra, but I was too disoriented to tell who it was. It could be Deidara, or it could be Naruto.

I didn't want to take a chance, so I ducked into the nearest burrow in the hill.

It seemed to be disused by animals, which was good.

I curled up in a small ball and waited for the chakra to pass.

It did.

I popped my head out of the hole a few minutes later. The coast was clear.

I hopped out and continued my trudge through the mud and rain.

This unrelenting task lasted for a few more hours.

I wasn't completely sure where I was at this point. The rain had disoriented me and I was not fully concentrated, thanks to my mental state.

Thanks to my lack of focus, I almost didn't move out of the way in time when a kunai was flung at me.

I crouched down into my battle stance immediately and snapped my head up to search for the attacker.

I spotted them quickly. Rogue..? I wondered, noticing his lack of a headband.

"What do you want?" I hissed.

"A fight? Money? Sex?" he smirked. On Deidara, a smirk was sexy and adorable. On this man, it looked dirty. Although I vaguely noticed that he was blonde as well, he couldn't have looked more different.

"You have no idea who you're fucking with." I growled.

"Sure I do, honey buns."

"If you did, you'd be running away right now." Right now, I wasn't in the mood for human communication, let alone a disgusting pig.

He pulled out a long katana from a sheath on his back.

I rolled my eyes. His position on the tree made it all too easy.

I turned my back.

"Cocky, ain't you?" he chuckled.

I lifted one foot and tapped it on the ground. The earth rumbled and cracked. The tree tipped.

The pig-man certainly hadn't been ready for that.

Unfortunately for me, he had good enough of reflexes to jump off the tree before it smacked into the ground.

"This is going to be fun."

I scoffed quietly.

He threw another kunai in my direction. Instead of stepping out of the way, like I could have, I turned and caught it in one hand easily. It was one of my intimidating tactics for useless ninja I didn't want to waste time or energy on. "You're gonna have to do better than that."

He lunged at me with his katana.

I blocked it easily with his own kunai. This was pathetic.

Obviously, this man had no jutsu or enough skill to beat me.

I knocked the sword out of his hand and knocked him onto his back.

He scrambled back a few feet, digging in his pack furiously.

I stepped- lightly- onto his chest. Not enough pressure to do any damage, just hurt like a bitch.

I held the kunai up to his throat. "Check-mate."

Then, unexpectedly, he reached an arm up weakly to slap a seal-like paper on my arm.

I felt it instantly. My chakra was draining. Some sort of seal that drains chakra? "Cheater. Using… cheap tricks… to win a fight… against a girl…" I panted. I was already fatigued. I had to end this now, or I'd be as good as dead.

I threw the kunai at him. It was weaker than it should have been, and he blocked it easily. "You're mine, Pinky." He smirked.

I saw a flash of blonde, then nothing.

I figured I was dead.

The oblivion was terrible.

There was nothing at all. It wasn't nearly as bad as the pain I'd felt in my heart, though. I'd take the trade.

Nothingness for the worst pain a person could imagine.

For some reason, that made it hurt; think that.

Death was uncomfortable.

Now my non existent shoulder hurt. Why was that?

Shouldn't pain not exist in death? Shouldn't I?

I saw a light.

Wasn't it empty here?

Was I finally getting to the pleasant part of death?

I felt like my eyes were closed.

But I still saw the light.

I opened my non existent eyes.

"Sakura!"

My non existent body was enveloped in a hug.

I hugged the person back with my non existent arms.

When they pulled away, I gasped.

"Deidara!" I felt the tears streaming. There was no way I could stop them now.

Realization had finally hit me; I wasn't dead. He'd saved me.

He held me as close as he could in a suffocating hug.

"I love you so much, Sakura. I never want you to leave again. Please. I love you. I love you, I love you."

I heard the thickness of his voice.

"Don't cry," I whispered, the hypocrite I was.

"I love you," he was still whispering. He sounded… broken. There was no other word for it.

"I love you too, Deidara." I whispered, my voice coarse, "That's why I left. I love you so much, that I'd leave so you don't get hurt. I'd hurt myself."

He was still chanting 'I love you'. "Please, don't leave me again." He added.

"I can't stay, Deidara." The tears were coming faster now. "I can't. You have to see how impossible it is."

"Nothing is impossible." He argued, stubborn as ever.

I shut up. I knew I was hurting him even more. "I'm sorry." I squeezed my eyes shut and tightened my arms.

"Don't be sorry. Just promise."

"I…" I paused, letting a sob rip though my body, "I want to Deidara. I really want to. But I can't."

I felt a prick or moisture against my neck, where his face was buried.

I knew how difficult it was for Deidara to let people in. I was probably the only person he'd ever cared about in his life besides himself. And now I was crushing him, destroying his trust.

I pulled his face back. I saw the trails left by his tears. I saw the hurt in his blood shot eyes.

I smashed my lips to his.

In the kiss, I could feel everything; the hurt, the pain, the want, he love, the passion, the need, the anger, the joy, all of his battling emotions.

I knew he'd feel my jumble of emotion; hopelessness and despair side by side with love.

We tipped back, falling to the ground from our sitting position. I barely registered that the ground wasn't muddy; he must've carried me somewhere.

Deidara's elbows pinned me on either side of my head.

"I love you," I panted between kisses.

He nibbled down my neck, freeing my mouth.

I could feel the lust radiating from both of us, but I knew we were exhausted.

This would have to wait for another night.

My heavy eyelids shut and refused to open.

I think he drifted to sleep before me because his body sagged lightly on top of mine.

My eyes open to a bright, clear sky. Deidara wasn't on top of me anymore. He was a few feet away, sitting in a ball as he gazed up at the sky.

I rolled onto my stomach and stood up.

"Deidara," I called his name softly as I approached him.

I knew he heard me, but he didn't move.

I sat down next to him, my whole left side pressing up against him.

"Sakura," he said softly in acknowledgement.

"Are you okay?" I asked, pushing his hair behind his ears.

"Yes."

"You sure?"

"Yes."

His tone was becoming more curt, and it stung.

I knew I deserved it, for the most part, since I'd left. He needed to understand that it had been for his own good, though.

"Are you mad?"

He didn't respond.

"I'll… I'll just leave." I whispered.

Hurt radiated through my whole body as I stood up.

"No," he whispered, grabbing my wrist. "Please, God, no."

I sank back to the ground. "Deidara,"

"Sakura," he cut me off, "you have no idea how much you hurt me, when you left. I thought… I thought I would never catch you. That I'd never see you again."

"I left for you." I said.

"I don't care what happens to me. I just want you." He protested.

"It's never going to work Deidara." I cried. "Can't you see that?"

He turned towards me. "Don't say that."

I sighed. I'd caused him enough pain; I didn't need to drive salt into the wound as well.

After all, it was a wound that we shared. One that would leave a gruesome scar.

"I love you," I smiled softly. It's not going to work, I added silently.

A/N:
A bit of an emo chapter, isn't it? Sorry again for the long update wait… I want to remind you all to vote in my profile poll… if I don't get more votes, I'm just going to go ahead and write a Twilight fic… I can't choose between an EdwardXBella and and EdwardXJasper -cough- I have more than one thing to poll you guys about, so I'll post my questions in my profile. Send me a message with your answer, please :) I now have a beta; k92littered! Thank you so much!