A/N: Thanks to all my readers who waited patiently (or impatiently) for this chapter. It's unbeta'd because as wonderful as my beta k92littered is, none of us live online. I wanted to get this chapter out as quick as possible for all of you. Sadly, it's a tad shorter than usual, but the juiciness makes up for it. I hope. Warning: lots of angst. (why does this story always reflect my frigging mood???) I think my writing style is changing, courtesy of my English teacher who insists my writing is terrible and doesn't have enough tone (or anything else!)

Disclaimer: Not mine people!

Chapter Thirteen: Need

I awoke to a slight tickled running down my back. I cracked one eye open to see Deidara's face inches from mine.

"Morning." I murmured my voice rough from sleep.

"Hey sleepy." He grinned,

I had the feeling that I'd been asleep for a pretty long time. Not just because of Deidara's teasing, but also because of the way my body felt; recharged, yet lazy at the same time. But there was another sort of feeling there. I couldn't put my finger on what it was. I'd never felt anything like it before. I bit my lip in realization.

"How long have I been asleep?"

Deidara glanced at the clock in the corner of the room. "Almost fourteen hours."

My suspicions were confirmed, then. I groaned.

"It's okay." He chuckled. "You needed it." He added softly.

Something was off about his face.

"What happened while I was asleep?" I demanded.

"Nothing." He answered too quickly.

"I'm not stupid." I growled slightly.

He sighed. "I'll tell you after you eat something." He conceded after a long pause.

I glared at him for a short moment. "Fine." I muttered.

Deidara stood and dug through my bag, tossing some random clothes at me. Or her claimed it was random. I raised an eyebrow at the extremely skimpy clothes he picked out. At 'random', of course.

My outfit consisted of some very lacy panties that weren't exactly suited to the ninja lifestyle unless you received a…certain type…of mission; a lacy little bra that 'coincidentally' matched the panties; an old, pink, too-short skirt that showed glimpses of my ass if I moved the wrong way (and matched my hair); and a black form fitting, low-cut shirt.

Peachy.

I pulled on the clothes, of course making faces at Deidara the whole time.

He scanned me appreciatively when I was done. His look read 'you only look better naked'.

I rolled my eyes lightly before reaching out for his hand. "Let's go eat." I sighed grudgingly.

He smirked.

Deidara led me down the hallway and sat me down in one of the kitchen chairs.

Itachi and Kisame, and everyone else for that matter, seemed to be strangely missing. Something was very, very wrong.

Deidara took his place in front of the stove and proceded to—very slowly—fry up some eggs.

I tapped my foot impatiently. "Hurry up."

He just turned his head slightly to smirk at me before returning his attention to the eggs again.

The fact hit me that there was an S-ranked criminal, part of Akatsuki, standing not two yards away from me in a pink apron—Kisame's—and was cooking for me. I know it's random to think, considering I was married to him and the whole nine yards, but in that moment of near hysteria I cracked up laughing.

He glanced at me nervously. "You okay?" he checked up.

"Fine, fine." I waved my hand at him to stop worrying.

He was too good to me. He really was. Albeit a little insane, and maybe a tad evil and sadistic, he was incredibly sweet. Much too sweet for me to deserve. I bit my lip.

"Sakura?"

My head snapped up just in time to see him set the plate of eggs in front of me.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

I nodded. "I'm fine." Lie.

"You sure?" he sat down in the chair next to me.

"Yes." Also a lie. I scooted the eggs around on my plate with a shaky hand.

"Aren't you hungry?" he sighed.

"No." That was truth. There was no way I could eat right now.

Deidara sighed again and shook his head slightly.

"I'm sorry." I murmured and scooted into his lap.

He wrapped his arms around me securely. "It's okay." He whispered, placing a soft kiss on my cheek.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?"

"Are you going to eat?" he countered.

I sighed and tossed one of the whole fried eggs into my mouth. I over exaggerated the chewing motions. He waited until I was done.

Deidara was biting his lip. I took that as a sign that things were extremely fucked up.

"What is it?" I asked him softly.

"Let's go for a walk." He dodged my question.

I sighed. "Fine." I muttered angrily. "What the hell are you putting off?"

He avoided my gaze.

"Come on." He lifted me off of him so he could stand, though he kept my hand.

I allowed him to lead me. It wasn't like I wanted to walk anyway. He was just putting off the inevitable. This had to be bad. I couldn't sense the chakra presence of Kakashi or Naruto either. That worried me.

Deidara ended up dragging me to the same hill where he'd proposed to me, and yes I do remember the exact hill he proposed to me on. It's not weird. You would remember too.

I settled in his lap without a fight because although it was really irritating that he was avoiding telling me…whatever, I loved him.

I straddled him and kissed his lips softly. "Will you tell me now?"

"In a minute." He gave me a small, weak smile. "I'm enjoying this."

I chuckled and kissed him again. I pushed him back onto the ground and leaned over him to kiss his neck.

He smiled, a little more genuinely this time.

I let him sit back up. I put on my serious time. If he wasn't going to talk, I was. "Listen, Deidara—"

"They all left." He whispered, interrupting me. "You Hokage couldn't reason with Naruto, and your Elders decided it was better not to get on Naruto's bad side."

I felt my lower lip trembling just a moment before Deidara pulled me into a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry." He murmured in my ear. "It's my entire fault."

I shook my head uselessly and ignored the tears I knew were streaming down my face. "Wh-where… where is Kakashi?" I asked quietly. I had to say good bye to my former Sensei.

I felt Deidara's arms tightened. "They all left. They had to." He whispered again.

I heard the sobbing noise coming from my lips, but I didn't believe it was me.

"Sakura," he pleaded, "if you want to return to Konoha, I would never stop you."

"Don't say that," I sobbed quietly against his chest.

"You know it's true."

"And you don't have to say it." I bit my lip hard enough to taste the iron-y tang of blood against my tongue.

"Why Sakura?" He sounded broken.

"Because it always reminds me that you are too good and—don't try and point out that you're insane or whatever shit you spout because I don't care. Don't you understand that I love you? That none of those matters?" I bit back the new onslaught of tears.

Then his lips were against mine, suctioning away all the pain. Sure, that sounds corny, but that's what Deidara does to me; he makes me forget everything I don't want to remember.

My time in the asylum. My friends abandoning me. My shitty excuse for a life. The list goes on and on. Take your pick. Oh! Or maybe the fact that I was pregnant. Yes. I said it. Pregnant. That's what I'd been feeling when I woke up. Even in such early stages, my medic body had picked up the new invasion. That's why I'd bit my lip this morning. Lend me your old coat hanger, will you? Or push me down a flight or two of stairs. Maybe that will take care of me as well.

A single tear ran down my face in the same old salty trail left from moments earlier.

I relaxed into his arms after a few minutes, tired. Yeah, I'd just slept for almost fourteen hours but I was emotionally taxed. I drifted off to sleep in the arms of the one good thing in my life.

I woke, for the second time that day. It was still light, so I had only been asleep for a few hours. We were still on the hill. It was fitting for what I needed to tell Deidara.

From what I gathered with my sleep-hazy mind, I was curled up against Deidara's side and he was rubbing my back softly.

"Deidara?" I murmured.

"Are you really awake this time? Or are you mumbling in your sleep again?" I heard the amusement in his tone.

"I do not mumble in my sleep." I protested.

"Yeah, yeah." I could practically hear his eyes rolling.

I attempted to sit up. I was a little out of it still though, so I gave up and just curled into Deidara's side. My news could wait a few more minutes.

"I love you." I informed him.

"I know." He chuckled.

I sat up. He followed suit, naturally. I smiled at him nervously.

"Deidara, there's something I need to tell you." I whispered.

He looked worried. Almost like I was going to tell him I was leaving. Well, quite the opposite.

I crawled into his lap. I needed to be close to him when I told him this.

"It's… not bad." I told him. Immediately his expression lightened.

He exhaled noisily. "Okay." He smiled. "You were scaring me."

"Well, it's not bad to me." I bit my lip. "And I hope it's not bad to you either."

My eyebrows scrunched together. What if he didn't want it? Tenten had confided in me once that she had been pregnant. And that Neji had sent her straight to get an abortion.

Now that I'd lost almost everything, I wanted this baby. Even if I still did have a home, and friends, I would still want this baby. It was testimony to the love between Deidara and me.

He still looked worried. "What is it, Sakura?"

"I'm pregnant Deidara."