CHAPTER 8
" THREADS "
Jacob had severed all ties with the tok'ra. It seemed their new policies were conflicting with his own personal beliefs and Jack was one happy camper. The old man had finally seen the error of the tok'ra ways, which surprised him. Then again everything was a surprise to Jack O'Neill. Sam's marriage, his relationship with Kerry. Things were going fast and he smiled when he remember the biggest change. The little girl whom was currently being taken care of by Daniel.
Now he was currently making a sweet bbq, a fine woman was looking for a salad bowl inside and later he was going to have a nice long evening with that woman. A small smirk played at his lips it had been a long, long time since he had gotten any and now he had it and he was not going to let it go. Not by a long shot.
"Sir…"
He shook his head. No, he was just imagining it. There was no way she was here right now, while he was thinking about Kerry in a most ungentlemanly way. Shaking his head he continued to chard his meat and wondered if it was his conscious that was making him think of Sam. At this moment he was after all only with Kerry as a second best.
"Ah sir…"
"Carter?"
He glanced towards the house. Good, Kerry is inside. That was good. Glancing at Sam he smiles and tells himself to relax and not be nervous. This is nothing, just a visit, nothing more nothing less.
"I wanted to talk with you."
"Oh?"
"Pete bought a house."
"That's great."
He smiled. Yes he was one hell of a good actor. Then again he was trained to be deceitful and be good at it, so he smiled and nodded. Yeah, keep the surprise and hurt from your face, from your eyes, think about something else and keep focused.
"Isn't it?"
"The thing is… the closer I get to the wedding the more I feel that I could be making a huge mistake."
She was hesitant how to tell him, how to express what she was feeling and how to say to him that it was because of what she felt for him. That she didn't want him to be with someone else. She knew about Kerry and his relationship with her, yet she wanted to at least tell him that her feelings had not changed. Despite everything she still loved him.
He was hurt. Why now, why now, what the hell was she thinking? He didn't want this, he didn't want to be told this, not now. He was hurting enough, hadn't he been hurt enough? He cursed and took a deep breath. He glanced at the house once more and then he froze and she felt a presence behind her. She had screwed up.
"Jack I couldn't find…"
That had been that and she had excused herself her, stomach tightened and she closed her eyes. This was not good and then everything was clear. It had all been too late. Everything was a mess and she couldn't fix it. She left and slammed her hands in the steering wheel. She couldn't fix this, she couldn't undo this. She could blow up a sun, but could not fix her damned life.
Taking a deep breath she drove off and didn't look back. If she had, she would have seen Jack O'Neill standing there, his face filled with anger. He had missed her. She had driven off and away from him. Kerry walked towards him and smiled sadly.
"I'm sorry Jack."
"It's ok... I… I think is for the best. She has Pete."
Kerry closed her eyes and cursed. Sam's timing had been off, way of and now she had been hurt just as she had been. But she didn't mind. She was not in for the love part, she was in it for the simple act of sex and company. Nothing more, nothing less and now she had perhaps ruined Jack's only chance with his one true love.
THREE WEEKS LATER
Positive, a positive result. How could that make her feel as if her whole world was crumbling down? She should be happy, should be jumping off the walls. She was however uncertain, she didn't know how to respond, what to do or how to act. All she knew was that a positive usually meant something good.
The blue positive sign on the plastic stick in her hand however, made her feel anything but. She now knew why she had been feeling so weird, why the mood swings and why her emotional state. She had known and now the test confirmed it. She was pregnant with Pete's child.
She would have her dream house, a huge back yard where her child could play, a loving husband and a dog. She was going to have everything she ever wanted. She was going to get married, move in with him and live the rest of her life with him and their child. So why did it seem so wrong!
The child, the house, the back yard, the dog, everything was what she had always wanted and more, but as much as she tried to picture Pete carrying her into the house, she was slapped with a reality that she couldn't deal with right now. The fact of the matter was she couldn't picture Pete in her perfect house.
Cursing her mind and imagination, she stood and dropped the test in the trash can. Things needed to be in order, needed to change. Taking a deep breath she went to do what she needed to, her body working on auto pilot, her mind speaking without her taking notice and when it was all said and done, she was staring at a very angry Tok'ra.
"Sam why?"
"I want to have a life Dad."
"You can have your life and your career."
"Please don't make this harder on me than it is Dad. I need to do this, I have succeeded professionally, now let me succeed personally."
"Will I ever see you?"
"I don't know Dad. D-denver is far and after this I won't have clearance anymore and…"
"You can't possibly think that Jack would shut you out do you? Sam for God's sake, these people, they are your family!"
"I know ...don't you think I know that? But I want more; I want my life to be mine, to make a clean break an start over."
For the life of him Jacob Carter couldn't understand and Selmak was as confused as he was. Her eyes didn't speak of love, didn't shine with that feeling. They were hollow and sad. This was difficult for her, but there was just no way he could see her leaving the Air Force for some cop.
Even Selmak's calming words made him want to scream at his daughter, to make her understand, to tell him what was really going on, but he knew that she would say the same thing over an over. As much as they both knew it was a lie, she would not waver on her resolve.
"Have you told Jack?"
"I handed him my resignation an hour ago."
"He accepted?"
"He didn't have much of a choice ...after what I told him."
"Told him what?...Sam...you?"
"It was the only way."
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She hid the sadness and the sorrow; she hid every last one of her emotions and smiled and Jacob Carter knew that he had lost his daughter. She was going to move away, marry some cop and for what? A chance at being normal, a chance at a normal life? He couldn't deny her that, he wanted what was best for his little girl.
With Selmak's wisdom he knew that he had to let her do this, even if it was a mistake. He knew she needed to learn from what she was about to do. One last hug, one last good bye and she walked away from the SGC, from her father, her friends an family, to a new life with her new husband and her unborn child.
There were no good byes and no letters to her friends, she had let Jack do the dirty work for her. He told their friends, they admonished him for not telling them sooner, but when they drove to her house she was gone. Moving men were there getting her stuff from her house. Samantha was nowhere to be found.
"Excuse me, do you know where the lady in the house moved to?" Jack asked.
"Sorry, this stuff is going into storage."
"I see ...t-thank you."
No good bye, no explanation, no nothing. To say that they felt betrayed was an understatement. They had fought alongside her, suffered alongside her, risked their lives side by side and she had left them with no word, no nothing. Just like that Samantha Carter had left them and they wondered, they doubted, did she ever care? Did she give a damn about them at all? Weren't they a family?
Cassandra just laughed and shook her head when they gathered at Jack's house. Her laugh was filled with pain and hatred, something Jack wished that time would banish. Janet was angry, Daniel was hurt and for the jaffa, she was nothing to him anymore.
"You ok honey?" Pete asked.
"Yeah just a bit afraid you know?"
"I know, this was so sudden but I'm glad we did it."
"So am I."
She tried to smile a genuine smile, but failed. He didn't know the difference between her fake smile and her real one, he didn't know her, so she could lie to him. She could live like this and she would have her son, love him with all her heart, be a wonderful mother and wife. She never gave up on any thing after all.
This would be another challenge, another test for her to conquer. She would get past this, she would learn to love Pete and she would give all her love to her son. She was doing this for him, so he could have a father, a family, so he could be happy.
Denver was different, the house was not her dream house, but it was for the best. That had been a fantasy, nothing more. This house in Denver was reality. They were going to become a family. She smiled and leaned into her future husband's shoulder.
"So you sure you want to do this?"
"Yeah I want to have a fresh start."
"If that's what you want babe then who am I to argue?"
"Thanks Pete, for every thing."
"Hey no worries on my part. The sooner we get married the sooner we can have our honey moon."
"And it'll be great."
"It'll be great."
He repeated and smiled when he saw the tears falling down her face. She was happy and he smiled. How could he make Samantha Carter happy? He was just a cop and yet here she was, in his arms on their way to Denver to their new lives. He was lucky and he was happy, because he knew she loved him and he knew he made her happy.
He was wrong.
continued
A big thanks you toall whomread and hope you still like the fic be patient with it as it takes some time to all come together if i can make it come together hehehe thank you all
archangewoman