50 ways to annoy Kevin.
A/N: I like making fun of short people, mainly because Im 5'2'' and live in the country with, like, the tallest people in the world. :") LOL! Only 1 review and then I have a hundred reviews on this, OMGOMGOMGOMG SANK YUU!
Warnings: Cat jokes, pervertedness, the usual :)
Disclaimer: I never do this, but it's true, I don't own beyblade, I do own my sick mind, though.
1. Stomp him on his head.
2. If he asks why, give him three reasons: He's short, He's Asian, because you can.
3. Call him a twat.
4. Lift him up by his hair whenever you talk to him.
5. When he walks by say: "Here...Kitty Kitty Kitty."
6. Replace his clothes with Mariah's.
7. Shave off his hair when he's sleeping.
8. Take the mustache out of Kenny's mouth and glue it onto his head. (Mr. D's mustache has been through so much in such a short time...)
9. Wake him by singing and dancing Kalinka really loud every morning.
10. Say it's a Russian custom.
11. Continuously talk to him Japanese, ignore him when he tells you he's Chinese.
12. Learn some Mandarin swears. Then tell him that you've learned some Mandarin and that you would like to say something to him in Mandarin.
13. Ask him if he would like some catnip.
14. Dress him up in Lee's mankini when he's asleep. (It's not that hard stealing Lee's mankini, he gets naked all the time!)
15. Do not wash it beforehand.
16. Fling some Beijing Duck at him.
17. Talk to him in Latin.
18. Get really mad at him when he doesn't understand you.
19. Pretend to be mentally retarded one day every week.
20. .Sdrawkcab kaeps
21. Stab him with a fork.
22. Repeatedly.
23. Throw tampons at him. (They can be used, but that's a little but too disgusting, even for me.)
24. Stress just exactly how short he is, then stomp him on the head.
25. Ask him if he wants to show you his "tail." (interpret that anyway you want.)
26. Tell him Boris wants to marry him.
27. erusaelp lauxes nwo sih roF
28. But comfort him, he won't actually do it, he's actually fucking Voltaire's brains out at the moment.
29. Spam his YouTube account.
30. With "marry an Asian girl" advertisements.
31. Order Pizza on his address every Thursday.
32. Make sure to order pizza's he doesn't like.
33. Kill his Teddy bear.
34. Replace all of his music with Death/Black metal.
35. Write "Gay Asian Boy" on his forehead with permanent marker.
36. Ask him if a dick can break.
37. Don't stop staring at him.
38. Make sure you don't blink that makes it even more scary.
39. Every time you see him, start singing the national anthem and run around dancing wildly.
40. When the bruise from the Beijing duck has healed, throw a frozen Beijing duck at him.
41. Because he's short.
42. Say you're sorry for the first time you threw Beijing duck at him, frozen Beijing duck has way more impact!
43. Wake him up at 3 AM every morning to pray for the cauliflowers.
44. Ensure him it has a deeper meaning.
45. Dress up as him and go around telling people you like to touch yourself during BeyBlade matches.
46. Redecorate his house, using hedge shears and some ketchup. (serves as fake blood.)
47. When he's showering, scream "Fire!!"
48. LOUDLY.
49. Make sure you blow out an eardrum.
50. Or two. X3 Because he's short!
A/N: I really don't know where these came from...