AN: Thanks for the reviews everyone! They make me really happy! I've had a little difficulty getting this chapter written, so I apologize for the delay. There are some very serious themes coming up in this chapter, so be warned. I hope you will still enjoy the chapter, even when these themes come up. Please review and let me know what you guys think!
Disclaimer: I don't think I have to keep saying it, but I do not own Glee or anything to do with it; nor do I own any song selections.
Chapter 5: Loss
(Early Saturday morning after "Wheels" week)
Rachel jerked awake from the combination of her cell phone ringing and a tapping on her window. She rubbed her eyes, trying to see what the ridiculously bright screen said, but before her eyes could adjust, there was another tap on the window. Rachel looked at her closed, curtain drawn window, unsure if she really wanted to look. What if it was a burglar or rapist or something? They don't usually knock on windows Rachel. They usually just break in.
Leaning over, she turned on her bedside lamp, her eyes automatically closing from the brightness. But she forced her eyes open and looked at her phone, seeing a missed call and text from Noah.
*Are you awake? I need to talk to you.*
Rachel got out of bed and slowly pulled her curtains back, not sure if she was doing the right thing. Just because Noah texted this late doesn't mean he's outside her window. Only, it does, as she can see Puck's face looking back at her from the tree outside her window. She tries not to jump, but is sure she failed, before sliding her window up.
"What are you doing here Noah? It's like four in the morning. Couldn't it have waited until morning?" Rachel whispers, moving out of the way so his sinewy body could slide into her room. She was going to continue to reprimand him when she saw his face, which had a look of such deep sadness and pain that she pulled him over to her bed, easing his cold body down. She didn't want to think about how long he had been trying to get her attention, as his body was freezing from the November night.
"Noah, what happened? Is everything ok? Did something happen to your mom? Your sister?" Rachel asked quietly as she moved to lock her door and grabbed another blanket from her closet. She waited patiently for him to respond, not wanting to push him for answers before he was ready. Walking back to him, she helped ease him out of his coat and shirt, wrapping him in the soft blanket and setting his clothes to the side. She knew that something was terribly wrong when he didn't even make a sexual innuendo about her undressing him. Taking a deep breath and silently praying for the strength to help him with whatever it was that had happened; Rachel climbed on to the bed next to him and pulled him up against her headboard.
"Baby, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong." Rachel whispered, wrapping her arms around him and leaning into his shoulder. She became aware of the trembling, which really freaked her out, because Rachel didn't know what could be so bad to actually affect Noah Puckerman to such a degree. They set there for what felt like hours, and when Noah began to speak, his voice was so quiet and hoarse that Rachel almost didn't hear him.
"Quinn lost the baby." Puck could feel the tears surge to his eyes with his admission. He knew he shouldn't be there with her, especially since she was going to hate him after she found out the truth. But he couldn't keep himself from seeking her out; needing her embrace and beautiful face, especially as he felt like his entire chest was going to cave inwards because his heart had been ripped out.
"Oh, poor Quinn. Do you know what happened? How'd you find out?" Rachel's voice was soft, not wanting to be too loud and ruin his sudden openness. Puck buried his face in her hair, and Rachel was surprised when she felt the warm wetness of tears begin to hit her shoulder.
"Finn came to see me…
Puck was pulled from sleep when the rough shaking of his shoulders would not let up. Who in their fucking mind would wake him up before he was ready to rise? They must have a death wish or something! Finally Puck pride his eyes open, his gaze blurry until it focused on the tall boy above him. Sitting up in bed, Puck tried to focus on the figure in his room, his mind seeming to work sluggishly.
"Finn? What are you doing here at this hour?" Puck's eyes were able to focus enough to see his best friend's face, which had a look of pure hurt that Puck thought he had found out about his night with Quinn. 'It was going to catch up with me one of these days. I guess I better face it head on.' But before he could even open his mouth again, Finn had sat down on his bed, his shoulders beginning to shake.
"I needed to talk to someone, and since my mom doesn't know about it, I hoped you wouldn't mind. I know it's late, but…I just came from the hospital and…" Finn seemed to choke on his words, tears clogging his throat. Puck's stomach seemed to drop out of his body, a feeling of dread filling him.
"What happened Finn? Is Carole alright? Is it…Quinn? Did something happen to Quinn?" Even as he asked, Puck could already tell that he had hit the nail on the head. Finn crumpled into himself, his arms wrapped tightly around himself as his entire body began to shake. Puck felt his own throat contract as a large lump formed, making it difficult to swallow.
"She called me after we left school. She was cramping really bad and then there was blood. I took her to the ER, but they said they couldn't do anything for her. She was already in the process of losing the baby; they said we just had to wait it out because they couldn't save the baby." Puck suddenly couldn't breathe his chest tightening until he thought it would break. 'Quinn had lost the baby. Lost the baby. My baby girl is gone. Gone. I didn't even get to see her face. She's gone, I'll never know her.' The thoughts seemed to be a recording, replaying in his mind over and over and over again.
"I know I didn't want to be a dad, not at sixteen. But…I think I may have loved the baby. It was a part of me and Quinn, someone that would have always had a little part of me with them. I never imagined it would hurt this bad to lose her." Finn's voice was hoarse and Puck knew his friend must be feeling the same thing he was. He wanted to rave that it was his baby girl that had died, not Finn's, but he held his tongue. He played his best friend role and wrapped Finn in a brotherly hug, wishing he could find someone to console him as well. 'I need Rachel. She might hate me after finding out, but I need to see her.'
The two best friends sat in silence as they both tried to come to terms with their loss. After a couple of hours, Finn finally left, his shoulders still slumped and the look on his face not having changed. Puck slowly got dressed, realizing that he might truly have nothing after he saw his girl. But he couldn't even imagine not seeing her as soon as possible, so he grabbed his truck keys and made his way over to her house, knowing it might be the last time she held him.
Rachel couldn't stop the tears from falling as Puck told her about Finn's visit. Her heart hurt for both Finn and Quinn, not knowing how the two would make it past this. She couldn't imagine the pain they must be feeling, especially Quinn. To have a life growing inside your body one day, and then the next for it to just be gone with no reward of a living child, had to be excruciatingly painful.
"I hope they can make it through this. They were certainly too young to have a baby, but the loss of it…I can't even put into words." Rachel stopped talking when her words seemed to make Puck even more distraught. At first she thought he was sympathizing with Finn, as he was his best friend. But as they sat there, Puck literally crying on her shoulder, Rachel could feel her stomach tighten with dread. She had never seen Noah cry about anything, and she didn't think his best friend's girlfriend having a miscarriage would be the cause of his breakdown.
"Oh Noah…please tell me it's not true." Rachel knew she didn't have to fully explain herself when he burrowed further into her hair, his arms tightening around her. 'It can't be true! Noah wouldn't do that to his best friend! No, but Puck would.' She could feel the anger begin to rise, her not understanding how he could betray his best friend, who he'd known for a good decade, when her brain caught up with her heart. If Finn wasn't the real father, then Puck was, and Puck (no Noah) had lost his baby girl.
"Oh baby I'm so sorry." Her eyes flooded anew as she wrapped herself around him, not even trying to hold onto her anger. His actions were in the past, when there was just Puck and no Noah. And while she thought his actions were wrong and deserved to be yelled at for, her heart was contracting for the obvious pain he was feeling.
"I'm so sorry. I never meant for anything to happen. I was drunk and mad at Finn and…I'm sorry. I can't believe she's gone." Puck's voice broke several times as he tried to speak, which just caused Rachel to tighten her hold on him. Puck was so relieved that she hadn't pulled away from him, especially when she figured out what he had done, that he was able to slowly pull away, staring down at her tear streaked face. He knew his eyes were puffy and red from his own crying, but when she didn't make fun of him for not being a badass, Puck knew Rachel was definitely the person he needed.
"Quinn just told me she was a girl this afternoon, before we gave the money over to Mr. Schue. I'd never felt such a…surge of happiness before. I know she didn't want her, didn't want to keep her; but I did. I wanted to raise her, to let her know every day that I loved her and wasn't ashamed to have her. But she's gone now." His voice broke at the last sentence and Puck had squeeze his eyes shut to keep from crying again. But it felt like there was a gaping hole where he had begun to develop feelings for the life growing inside of Quinn.
"Shh Noah. Just…just sleep for now. We'll talk about this later. Just rest and let me hold you." Rachel was surprised she was able to speak over the tears clogging her own throat. But she gave a small, pained smile and pulled him down to the pillows, pulling the blanket from him and chucking it the foot of the bed.
She pulled her comforter up over the two of them and snuggled into him, wrapping her body around him as best she could. Puck held her tightly to his chest, not believing that he had someone with so much love and compassion that the actually wanted to comfort him, even with the knowledge of his betrayal. Not knowing if she would be so forgiving in the light of day, Puck was going to cherish the time he had to hold her to him, which would hopefully be enough for him since he knew it would be asking for too much for her to keep him around.
/*/
Rachel quietly made her way out of bed, not wanting to wake him. She pulled her curtains closed again, the morning sun very close to reaching Puck's exhausted face. She didn't want anything to disturb him, especially not after the night he had had. She tried not to think too hard about the pain he was in as she grabbed some clothes and jumped into the shower. She wasn't sure if she had ever washed herself so quickly, but with the fear of the noise stirring him, Rachel found herself racing through her morning routine.
Once clean and put together, Rachel silently made her way out of her room. She headed to the kitchen, planning to make her smoothie even though she figured her morning workout would not be done that day. But it wasn't that much of a sacrifice, and Rachel just kept picturing Noah's broken face, so she just shrugged off the nagging voice saying that if she slacked off today, she would keep slacking off. Nothing was more important right now than getting Noah through this heartbreak.
"Good morning baby. We were wondering when you were going to get up. Running a little behind this morning?" Leroy asked as he flipped pancakes at the stove. They were nowhere near as good as real ones, since they used supplements for eggs and dairy, but Leroy prided himself on being able to make delicious pancakes. He glanced over to his partner, sharing a look that clearly asked if they should mention the fact that her door was locked that morning; and that there was a beat up truck in front of their house.
"Oh, I thought you guys would have already gone to work." Rachel said in surprise. The two men usually left around eight on Saturdays, so she was shocked to see them there when it was close to 9:30. She gave first Hiram, then Leroy a morning kiss as she made her way to the fridge, pulling out the makings for her smoothie.
"Baby…is there something wrong?" Hiram asked quietly, noting the drawn look of Rachel's face. He could see that she was hurting, and Hiram hated when his girl was hurting. Leroy dished out three plates of pancakes, which also surprised Rachel. She didn't usually eat a 'real' breakfast, but she could see the tell-tell spots of chocolate chips, and she gave in. How were you supposed to pass up chocolate chip pancakes, a definite comfort food, when you felt this bad? Sitting down at the breakfast bar next to Hiram, she stared down at her plate before slowly explaining what had happened.
Hiram gathered her in his arms as she cried, his heart breaking for her. Leroy walked around the bar until he too was hugging her, which seemed to make her break down even more. The two men felt horrible for Rachel, but especially for the three people this affected most. They might not like the idea of Noah Puckerman having betrayed his friend and gotten a girl pregnant, but they refused to let his past actions cloud their judgments about the boy. Everyone made mistakes, and the Berrys did not judge someone solely on those mistakes.
"I feel so bad for him daddy. I've never seen him look so…broken. It was like his entire heart was ripped from his chest and he didn't know how to get it back. I don't know what to do for him."
"You just have to be there for him baby. He's going to need you and your support more now than ever before. I know you two have not been seeing each other for an extraordinary amount of time, but obviously he trusts you and hopes that you'll give him that support. He wouldn't have come here if he didn't need you." Leroy rubbed soothing circles in her back.
"Should I tell Finn? I mean, he's my friend too, so should I tell him the truth?"
"No, I don't think it's your place. You have to remember that Finn is probably feeling the same sense of loss and hurt that Noah is. You don't want to be the one responsible for adding to that pain by letting it be known that his girlfriend and best friend betrayed him. The two will tell him the truth when they are ready, and you just have to make sure to be there for everyone when the fallout comes. I know it puts you in a horrible position, but you need to keep out of their business as much as possible. I can't even think about what Quinn must be feeling right now, and I don't want you to make things worse for her."
"You're right dad. I'm just going to support all of them and let them know that I'm here for them. I still can't believe that this has happened. What's the point of causing this much heartache?" Hiram pulled away from his daughter, seeing the hurt and anger that was stamped into her face.
"Sometimes things don't work out, but everything happens for a reason. No one can know His plans, but He doesn't make mistakes. Now eat your breakfast before it gets cold." Rachel sniffled before slowly eating her pancakes. Her fathers also began to eat, and the silence was more awkward than Rachel could ever remember it being. She didn't know if it was because of her confessions, the boy upstairs in her bed, or her fathers' new knowledge of said boy, but Rachel just wanted everything to go back to normal. To say she was relieved when both the men said their goodbyes and headed for work would be an understatement.
She did the dishes before making another round of pancakes, which she left in the warm oven. Rachel went about cleaning, trying to keep herself busy, when she saw the slumped figure walking towards his truck through the window. Racing towards the front door, not wanting him to leave, Rachel wrenched it open and stepped out onto her front porch.
"NOAH! Where are you going?" Rachel called out. He turned towards her, a look of surprise on his face. He had obviously thought she didn't want him to stay, since she hadn't been upstairs when he woke. But when she beckoned him back, Puck felt relief surge through him and quickly made his way to her. Rachel grabbed his warm hand in hers and pulled him back into the house.
"Where were you going? I didn't know you were even awake yet?" Rachel questioned as she pulled him into the kitchen and pushed him into a barstool.
"I thought you didn't want to speak to me this morning, so I was going home before you could…actually tell me you wanted me to go." Puck's voice was quiet, the night of crying making it difficult to talk. He never knew that a headache, one that rivaled a hangover headache, accompanied hours of crying, and Puck really just wanted to bury his head somewhere cool and dark. He watched as the pixie of a girl flounced around the kitchen, pouring orange juice into a tall glass before pulling a plate of…pancakes out of the oven. She placed the items in front of him before handing him the maple syrup and sitting down next to him.
"I just didn't want to wake you Noah. I figured you needed as much sleep as you could get. Now eat your breakfast." Rachel said, smiling softly at him. Puck just stares at her for a couple of seconds, which causes Rachel to squirm before jumping out of the seat, going back to picking up the first floor. Puck slowly begins to eat, not really tasting the food, more worried about the conversation he could feel was coming. When he was done, Puck washed his dishes and set them on the drying rack before making his way through the first floor, looking for his girlfriend. He finally found her in the den, where she was rearranging an already neat bookshelf.
"I can go if you want." Rachel jumped about a foot when the voice spoke from behind her. She whirled around, a cat figurine clutched in her hands. She stared at him until Puck could feel himself begin to blush (which was totally unbadass) before she set the statuette down on the bookshelf.
"No, no that's okay. I don't want you to leave, you just startled me. We need to talk." Rachel said, pointing towards the plush leather couch sitting against a wall. Puck followed her over to the piece of furniture, unsure if he really wanted to have this conversation. He could run now (yes run away) and pretend that she was not going to break up with him. He was tempted to do just that until the small hand pulled him down, making it clear that that option was clearly not on the table.
"Before you get any crazy ideas, we're okay Noah." Rachel watched as the relief flooded his face, which caused her to smile at him. But the pressure from all his revelations made it hard to keep the smile in place, and she found it falling quickly. She took his hands in hers, their bodies turned to face each other so their knees were bumping.
"I'm so sorry for what happened Noah. I can't begin to understand the pain you must be in right now. But you have to understand that I'm very ashamed of you for what you did. Finn is your best friend." Puck's head dropped in shame at her words.
"I know Rach. I don't know what I was thinking. I don't even remember that night very well. If I could take it back, I would. I never meant for anything like that to happen. Finn's going to hate me when he finds out." Rachel kept her grip on his hands, wanting him to know that she was still there, even though she was mad at him.
"He is going to be hurt, there's no doubt. But I'm not going to say anything to him." When he gave her a surprised look, Rachel just shrugged.
"I thought about it, since it's the right thing to do. But after talking to my dads, I realized that while it might be the truth, it would devastate him. He's already thinking he lost his child, I am not going to be the one to add a betrayal by the two people he should be able to trust to his burden." Puck felt like the slimiest, most vile human being on the face of earth at her words. He couldn't believe he had disappointed her so much.
"I'm sorry Rachel. I can't do anything about it now, but I really am sorry." His voice was quiet, almost too quiet for her to hear him. But she did and Rachel felt her heart unclench. She couldn't stay mad at him, especially for something he had done before they were together, and not when he was in so much pain.
"I know you are Noah, and I'm not mad at you. While your actions do not speak very highly of you, they were done by the old Puck. The boy who took every opportunity to make others' lives miserable, who through slushies in my face every day. But that boy is not here anymore Noah and I'm not going to be mad at you for something you can't change. While I believe the truth will come out eventually, as it always does, it won't be by me.
"I want you to know that I'm here for you Noah. I can't make the hurt disappear, but maybe I can help ease it. You're more than welcome to come to me whenever you need to, I'll always be here for you." Rachel whispered, her eyes shining with tears as she held his hands. Puck couldn't believe he had actually found someone so full of compassion for others that they would actually look over one of his biggest fuckups to support him. He pulled her into his lap and wrapped his arms around her, not believing he had gotten so lucky.
Rachel ran her hands over the short hairs of his Mohawk, loving the feel of the silky strands moving through her fingers. She never would have thought his hair would be so soft, as it was a contradiction to the reason why he had the haircut (to be badass). She wondered where the scar on the back of his head, which caused a small (triangle shape) piece of the hair to be missing. Questions for another time.
"I know you're hurting right not Noah, but you have to know that everything happens for a reason." Puck pulled back with that statement, his doubt evident.
"What's the point of killing an innocent baby girl? What'd she ever do to deserve that?" Rachel's eyes watered once more at his questions, but she pushed past them to stare down into his deep hazel eyes, wanting him to see how serious she was.
"There's no way to fully answer your question Noah. But He doesn't make mistakes, ever. There are millions of reasons why He didn't let her be born. She could have been a still born (Puck's breath caught at the mere thought), or she might have had a fatal, incurable disease. Maybe He did this now, to spare you the pain from losing her later own, when you have fallen completely in love with the actual little girl, and not just the thought of her. I know this won't make the pain go away, but you must realize that there's nothing you could have done.
"I did some research while you were asleep, and it's actually very common for teen mothers to…miscarry on their first child. Their bodies have not fully matured yet, and a lot of the times their bodies aren't ready for the changes being pregnant brings. So there was nothing you, Finn, or Quinn could have done to prevent the tragedy." Rachel whispered, hoping he would believe her. When he pulled her closer again, burring his head in her hair, Rachel sighed and wrapped her arms around his neck, trying to offer as much comfort as she could.
The two of them sat there for hours, talking quietly in between the long stretches of silence. Puck explained everything that had happened, how Quinn had refused to let him get involved at all, to the surge of pride he had felt when he found out the baby was a girl. Rachel just held him and let him talk, knowing he needed to get everything off his chest if he was going to be able to move past the experience. They only broke apart when Puck's mother called, wondering if he was coming home before she had to go to work. Rachel watched the sad boy drive away from her house, not knowing what more she could do to help him.
/*/
Pulling up in front of the Fabray house, Rachel had to take several calming breaths before she grabbed the container that had her 'get well' assortment of muffins, cookies, and other bakery treats and getting out of the car. 'You can do this Rachel. You might not be Quinn's number one fan, but you have to show your support, even though she hates you. She's going to need all the friends she can get to get through this, and you have to be the bigger person and go to her.'
Quinn's mother was surprised to see Rachel on her doorstep, but she told her to go on up. She knew Quinn wasn't feeling well, and something had happened last night because she had come back from Finn's in tears, so Judy welcomed anyone who could make Quinn feel better. Rachel quietly made her way up to Quinn's room, still unsure if she should be there or not.
To say Quinn was flabbergasted when she opened her door to see Rachel Berry of all people was an understatement. She just stared at the smaller girl until Rachel was squirming in her shoes, pushing the container into Quinn's hands.
"I just wanted to drop these off. I know you don't like me, but I wanted you to know I was here if you needed someone to talk to." When Quinn continued to stare at her as if she was crazy, Rachel began to back away from the door.
"What in the world are you talking about?" Quinn asked, glancing down at the pastries in her hands.
"Um…Noah came to see me." Rachel said, not wanting to make Quinn angry. When the other girl's eyes widened in shock and she quickly glanced up, Rachel knew that Quinn knew that she knew (that's not confusing). Quinn felt her heart tighten as she motioned for the girl to enter her room before she closed the door.
"He t-told you?" Quinn's voice shook as she set the container down on her desk, not sure if she would be able to keep a good grip on it. Her hands when to her stomach out of reflex of thinking of Puck, and she had to fight down a sob when she remembered that there wasn't anything inside her anymore. Rachel slowly nodded, her eyes tearing up again at the look of pain on Quinn's face. (Rachel couldn't believe how many times she had cried that day!)
"I guess y-you're going to tell F-F-Finn." Quinn asked as her lips began to tremble. Rachel hurried over to the girl, pulling her into a hug.
"No Quinn, I'm not going to breathe a word of it, I swear. It's not any of my business and I couldn't do that to any of you." Quinn burst into tears and clutched at the small girl, her entire body shaking from the force of her crying. Rachel slowly steered them towards the bed, where she was able to pull the weeping girl down. The two girls sat like that for several minutes, Rachel just letting Quinn have her melt down. When the blond finally pulled away, her entire face was red and she had to grab some tissue to wipe her nose.
"S-sorry." Quinn mumbled, not believing she had actually cried on Rachel Berry's shoulder. If that didn't show the state she was in, nothing else would. Rachel was shocked when Quinn began to talk, giving her own version of what happened, from the night with Noah to the loss of her baby. Rachel just stayed quiet, not wanting to interrupt the flow of emotion. When Quinn finally finished, having had several more bouts of tears during her explanation, Rachel gripped her cold hands in hers and gave them a squeeze.
"I'm really sorry Quinn, for everything you've been through. No one should have to face everything you have this year, and I think you are amazingly strong for being able to make it through this. I know it might not feel like you're going to survive right now, especially since I know you're feeling ten times what Noah was feeling, but you will. You're Quinn Fabray, and nothing in this world will be able to keep you down. The world doesn't stand a chance against you, so I know you'll pull through." Quinn laughed a little at her statement, not believing that the girl she had bullied for years was the one to actually comfort her.
"I never thought it would hurt so badly. I didn't…don't want to be a mother at sixteen, but I can't believe that she's gone. I just found out her sex and then…poof, she's gone." Rachel pulled her into an embrace when Quinn started to cry again, just letting her know that she had someone to rely on. The girls were interrupted when the door opened and Finn walked in, a look of surprise on his face when he saw his girlfriend and the girl he felt something for hugging on her bed.
"Finn! What are you doing here?" Quinn asked as she pulled away. She felt a surge of anger, her heart telling her that that her baby would still be alive if he had only gotten to her house faster. But her mind knew that that was not right, that there was nothing that could have been done. But her mind didn't always win out against her feelings, and she wrapped her arms around herself, trying to keep all the hurt and bitterness from spewing out of her lips. Rachel stood to leave, but the pleading look Quinn shot her kept her from moving out the door.
"I wanted to make sure you were okay." Finn's voice was hoarse, much like Puck's had been. Rachel looked harder at the tall boy and saw the same weariness and exhaustion that had clung to Noah and she gave Quinn a look, clearly telling the girl to be nice. Quinn pushed her irrational anger away and flung herself into her boyfriend's arms, sobbing quietly against his chest. Finn gripped her tightly, his eyes squeezed tightly to hold off his own tears. Rachel pulled on Finn's arm until he opened his eyes, looking down at her, clearly not understanding what she wanted. Rachel tugged until he started moving towards the bed, where Quinn curled into his lap as she continued to clutch at him.
Rachel moved away from the bed, grabbing her coat from the desk chair. She moved towards the door when Quinn's arm shot out, stopping her movement. Looking back at the girl, Rachel was surprised when Quinn pulled hard, causing Rachel to stumble into the bed and the couple. She wasn't sure what Quinn wanted, but when she felt Finn's arm wrap around her and hold her close to the blonde, Rachel relaxed and hugged the girl. The three of them sat there for a good forty minutes, just taking reassurance from the others' arms. During the entire time, Rachel could only think about Noah and how he was stuck at home watching his sister, alone with his own pain.
When they finally separated, Finn left because he couldn't deal with all the emotion anymore. He felt bad, but he just couldn't face it anymore that day. He went home, where he spent the rest of his day playing video games and ignoring the pain in his chest. When he was gone, Rachel was going to leave when Quinn asked how Puck was doing. After some convincing, Rachel got Quinn to accompany her over to Puck's house.
The boy was surprised to see them, and even more shocked when they ended up repeating their group cry. He couldn't believe he had both Rachel and Quinn wrapped in his arms, and if he wasn't filled with so much hurt and loss, he might have been able to appreciate the moment on a different scale. After they had all had a good cry (shut up, he was still badass), the three of them watched movies with Eli and ate pizza, all of them trying to move past the chocking lump in their throats. By the time the girls left, Puck was stunned that he actually did feel better, as if the loss wasn't as crimpling as it had been. Hopefully the pain would continue to ease, especially now that he had both Quinn and Rachel willing to let him actually feel the emotions and were there for him to talk to.
AN: SO SAD! I know! But I had to do it! And sorry this chapter is shorter, but I kept crying so I didn't want to write about this anymore. Please review!