Chapter 9: Burning Bridges
Jay mulled over the entire situation the whole way to Laura's house. She had fallen asleep about 5 minutes into the drive, giving Jay plenty of time to think. He knew Peter was going to be pissed at Laura, even if he was doing the exact same thing…Jay had to find a way to explain. He glanced over to Laura asleep in the side seat. She was practically curled into a ball with her cheek against the window. He smiled, she was so cute. How could he explain things to her? As soon as she wakes up in the morning she's going to hate him again…and he wasn't sure if his heart could take it. He pulled into Laura's drive and turned his car off. He gently tapped Laura's shoulder. "Wake up Laura. You're home." Laura's eyes slowly opened as she sat up. "Really? Wow…you weren't speeding were you?" She giggled as she stretched. But Jay only half smiled, keeping his eyes on his hands on the wheel. He felt Laura turn his face toward hers, and their eyes met. "Jay, what's wrong? You look depressed." Jay didn't say anything. He just stared into Laura's eyes. Her light blue grey eyes were focused on his blue ones. 'How could I even begin to explain myself to you Laura… ?'
When Jay didn't answer Laura removed her hand and sighed. "Well, thank you for bringing me home Jay. It was sweet of you." She leaned in and kissed his cheek. She got out and started for her door when she heard another door shut. Laura turned to see Jay coming around his car toward her. "Laura, you've got to be more patient with me." Laura cocked her head in confusion. "Jay, what are you talking about?" Jay's eyes kept shifting nervously toward her front door and his hands. "Well, I mean that I have a difficult time with saying what my heart's really feeling…even to my best friend…" He looked up at her, as if waiting for her to storm off. But she just laughed and grabbed his hand. "Ok then, shall we talk about this inside? It's pretty cold out here…" Jay was hesitant at first. "Don't worry Jay, my family's not here. They're at Tyler's college thing…you're safe."
Her house hadn't changed at all since he'd last been inside it. The living room was still decorated in a strange mix of apples and red leather and the funny cat-shaped door stop was still in the hallway next to the coat rack. Laura led Jay past the living room and up the stairs to her bedroom, which was still painted in pink and lime green stripes. Her bed was still covered with minty green covers and pink pillow cases; and still had the stuffed elephant Jay had gotten her for Valentine's Day years ago sitting on her bed. Jay smiled to himself. "Really? You haven't changed this room at all." Laura giggled as she kicked off her shoes. "Hey don't you judge. Bet your room is still boring white and covered with car posters." Jay held up his hands in mock surrender. "Ok ok you got me there…thought you got rid of that elephant after we broke up?" Laura looked at the animal briefly before kissing Jay's cheek softly. "Nah. He's too cute to throw away…so, what's your heart saying now?" Laura said wistfully; plopping herself down on the bed and cuddling with the elephant. Jay just stood there, searching his mind for the right words. "I…I'm having a bit of trouble deciding whether this is right or not Laura." Laura nodded her head knowingly. "Yeah, I know what you're saying Jay…I mean, ever since we…you know, did it I've been cheating on Peter…and you've been cheating on Cali." Jay ran his hand through his hair and sat down next to Laura on the bed. "And yet everything we've done so far has felt right! The kissing and the…sex…like we'd never broke up." Laura nodded and rested her head on Jay's shoulder. "But…you want to cut this off…because it's the right thing to do, right?" She tilted her head so she could look at his face. Jay could see the hint of sarcasm in her buzzed blues. Jay smiled a little. "Well, yes and no…I really came to the club tonight to attempt to break you and Peter up…"
Laura's head shot up, her voice was angry. "WHAT? You were gonna break me and Peter up? How could you?" Laura didn't wait for Jay to defend himself. She continued her rant, pacing the floor. "I guess only an ex would try and break up a couple that was doing amazing until you show up again and attempted to ruin everything!" Laura was close to tears. She continued, never even seeing the trash bin…she stubbed her toes on the bin and toppled backward and would've broken something if Jay hadn't stepped in. Jay grabbed her arm and pulled her down on top of him on the bed. They just stared at each other for a moment. "Careful there L…you just about broke your ass." Laura huffed and tried to push herself up but Jay held her still. "Jay, would you quit being a dick and let go of me!" Jay smirked and flipped her over, pinning her wrists above her head. Laura tried to wiggle free but Jay was too strong for her. "Jay! Let me up or I'll scream!" Jay laughed at her. "And who's supposed to her you?" Laura finally stopped wiggling. "Finally, I can tell you why I'm not going to quit till you and the Peter are apart…" Laura rolled her eyes but stayed quiet. Jay continued. "Laura…I'm not trying to get you to love me again…but don't throw everything away for him! You shouldn't make that mistake twice…" Laura knew exactly what Jay was referring to. "Jay…do you know why I threw everything away?…Because I thought I could change you. Make you turn from the dark side…but I guess I was wrong. You're still a guy who locks his heart away from view and acts so damn tough but really…is a lonely little boy who wants attention." Jay looked hurt but he kept his emotions at bay. "Fine. I'm going to have to learn to get over my love for you…but not for a sleezeball like Peter. He's nothing but trouble." Laura had to laugh. "He's not as familiar with trouble as you are Jay…you have no right to-" "Laura dammit would you listen to me just this once!" Jay's shout startled Laura. He was angry and hurt and trying to be heard. Laura's heart ached when she looked in his eyes. She looked away, fighting back her tears that threatened to spill over. Jay's voice instantly softened. "Laura, I'm sorry for yelling but you've been so damn nieve and not seeing what's right in front of you." She swallowed hard, trying not to look at him. "And what is right in front of me Jay? Huh? What ridiculous crime has Peter done that's gotten you so pissed off?" Jay didn't answer right away. She heard him take a deep breath, felt his body shift on top of hers.
Jay released his grip on Laura's wrists and got to his feet. "Why should I even bother telling you Laura? You'd just deny everything and say that I'm just a jealous ex." Laura didn't say anything; just laid on the bed staring up at him. She could tell he'd given up completely. The words came out before she could stop herself. "Dammit Jay! Either tell me or get out of my life! I'm so tired of this bad ass act!" Laura wished she could take back her words but the damage was done. "He's cheating too Laura…once you were too wasted to notice, he slipped away to play with a more willing girl. He's never cared for you…but you'll still stay with him anyway won't you? Just because I ratted on him you think it's just a bunch of shit!" Laura had heard enough. She jumped off the bed, furious. "Get out Jay! I've heard enough of your bullshit!" Jay slammed the door so hard it rattled the walls as he left. Laura waited till she heard Jay's civic pull out of her drive before she let the tears fall.