Wow guys, some really amazing reviews I've received from you. Seriously, your reviews are all that keeps me going to write this story. St4rgazerr, you make me LAUGH OUT LOUD. And to the lovely bazuka74, I promise I won't make you 'hunt me down like a dog' because your review has encouraged me to write this next chapter. I can't exactly give a shout out to everyone, because it would just take up too much space :(
So, as always, thank you for taking the time to review, and I have taken to writing another chapter with a few different POV's, since you all seemed to love it so much. Enjoy ;)
Effy POV
So about a week and a half ago, I had an episode. I don't remember much of anything, but Naomi says I locked myself in the bathroom with a kitchen knife. The only thing I remember is Naomi telling me she ran into Emily somehow... It's all a little foggy. And these new meds they put me on haven't been helping. The doctor said the prescription I was on stopped working, that I had built up some kind of immunity to it over the last year. How the fuck can you build up an immunity to smiley pills? Naomi has been sheepish for a while now, being overly cautious and not making too much eye contact with me; like if she does I'll somehow shatter into a million pieces. I know she's worried, but it's weighing on my last nerve. So, after spending the quietest hour of my life planted in front of the telly watching re-runs of Misfits with this increasingly irritating version of my best mate, I've had enough; I get off the sofa and head into the kitchen to make some tea.
"Eff..." She begins.
Fuck sake.
"I'm just making some tea" I toss over my shoulder.
As I'm mucking about in the kitchen, Naomi saunters in and rests herself against the doorframe, arms crossed around her chest. I'm not in the mood to talk about it, I honestly couldn't even if I wanted to. I hear her take a deep breath behind me before she speaks.
"Eff? look, I know you've got... stuff... going on but I-"
"Naomi" I cut in. I really, don't want to talk about this.
She comes over to me and places her hand on my shoulder, spinning me around so I can face her. "I really need you to hear me, okay? I... I need to talk and I need you..."
Okay, I'm confused. And I know that's not right, I'm never confused; and Naomi is so bloody readable. These new pills must be off. So we sit down at the kitchen table, and she starts to run her fingers along the edge of the place mat strewn across it. It was her idea, putting a piece of bright red fabric with patterns on it over a table. She said it would make it more 'homey', as she put it. I didn't care enough to argue, and I've since found it a bit useful to hide my spliffs under if I'm caught off guard. Well, that and I like to make little doodles with my sharpie on the table and hide them underneath it. If she saw them there she'd probably kill me. Wow, attention span of a newt. These pills are definitely off.
"So, I know you're going through stuff but... you're okay now, yeah?"
"Yes, Naomi" Well, kind of.
"Right. Well It's just, Emily... I feel bad. You know, for still being in love with her"
A little flash of memory comes back to me then, something about the girl I met at the bar a little while back. It must have been a dream I had, because she was saying something about being engaged to Emily. And Emily was in our kitchen? I know that's never happened. I haven't seen a Fitch in years. Naomi speaks again, bringing me out of my thoughts.
"She's with someone really good now, you know? ...Eff?"
"What?" I ask, clearly having a hard time concentrating.
"You met her, she's the one who talked you out of the bathroom"
"Who is?" I ask
"Emily's fiancé?" Naomi replies.
Well kick me in the ass with a spiked boot. That was real?
"Right..." I say "Emily was here too..."
"Yeah" She replies cautiously. "You remember, don't you?"
"Yeah yeah" I wave her off "go on" Lie.
"Okay well-"
"I think I kissed her" I blurt out, clearly missing the social construct of waiting until someone is finished speaking before you open your big yap.
Naomi stares at me in shock. She opens and closes her mouth a few times, and I can't help comparing her to a fish. I start to see little oxygen bubbles coming out of her mouth and floating above her face like she is under water, and I hear little popping bubble sounds in my head. Okay, that's it. I'm going back to the doctors. I snap out of my Finding Naomi daze and am welcomed by the sight of Naomi actually being at a loss for words. I must have been out of it for a while, because after some time of staring at me she squeaks out:
"You... you kissed, Emily?"
Oh, so that's what she was thinking.
"What? No, I kissed the girl she's marrying"
She furrows her brow at me and asks sharply "You, what? When?"
I shrug.
I see something click in Naomi's expression, because her face contorts into a big O. Ha, the big O. Orgasm. Oregano. Origami. Hey, that's fun to say, Origaaami... What the fuck is wrong with me?
"Wait," She holds her hands up "So you're telling me, that September is the girl you met at the bar that night?"
I nod.
She shakes her head in disbelief, and lets it fall into her hands before saying a muffled,
"This is just too fucking much."
'
'
September POV
How I ended up living on the couch of Katie Fitch is beyond me. Here's to hoping everything happens for a reason, because right now, I feel like total shit. It's like I'm in the middle of some really bad trip, with Emiliana Torrini screaming at the top of her lungs that I've fallen down the rabbit hole. My head is pounding, because I'm not accustomed to the dampness this side of the world brings. The sun hasn't poked it's head out in what feels like weeks and I'm starting to lose weight because I'm not eating... well, at all. I have a backpack with a few changes of clothes, some hair products, but that's about it. I sleep on a pull-out couch that I can only guess has been used by the twins' younger brother James, because when I pulled out the mattress, there was an issue of 'Fanny's Weekly' with some exceptionally hard pages stuck together in it. But, I can't complain, because this was my decision. I'm the one who left, I'm the one who couldn't stick around because I needed space. I don't know if you've ever tried it, but getting over a Fitch is extremely difficult, even if it's for the best. She's been very sweet throughout all of this though, Katie. She opened her home to me and makes me horribly burnt coffee every morning before she goes to work. This morning though, she is exceptionally cheery.
"Good morning babes, come on, up you pop!" She reaches her hand out to me, so I reluctantly take it and am sprung to my feet.
"There we are! Right. Do you have any normal clothes?"
"Uhm... What?"
"Well, you know. Clothes that arn't all edgy and like, ripped. Got a plain tee in there you could throw on or something?"
I take a mental inventory of my clothes while still being confused as shit, but I manage to remember I brought along a couple plaid shirts with me. "Uh, well I have some plaid..."
"Any writing on them?" She inquires, squinting at me like I'm on trial for murder.
"Well, there's one... no writing, but it has a fluer de lis on the back... it's not that noticeable..."
She's satisfied at least. "Right, okay. Pull that on, because you're coming into work with me"
Wait, what? She works for her mother, and I've never even met the woman I've only ever heard described as Cuntzilla; not to mention that I was just recently 'engaged' to her daughter. So I start to protest "Um, Katie? I uh... Well, I'd much prefer not to work at a wedding shop... you know, on the account tha-" She cuts me off mid-sentence with a rebuttal.
"Oh, no silly. We're going to my dad's gym. He needs someone to do reception, and since you needed some cash, I told him you'd do it. Plus, you know how much my dad loves you"
Right. Rob Fitch. Another person deeply affected by the latest series of events. I ended up telling Katie the truth about everything, because I couldn't bring myself to say it to Emily. This needs to be as quick and painless as possible, and the less words that pass through me and Emily, the better. I told Katie about how Emily would occasionally bring up Naomi in conversation the whole duration of our time together. I told her how every time Emily did that, it felt like she was trying to reassure herself of something. How I've always felt sub-par for Emily, like her heart belonged elsewhere. I told Katie how I shouldn't have allowed myself to get so involved with Emily, but that I couldn't help it. And, I told her that I didn't do this because I wanted to, I did it because I knew Emily needed me to.
Katie must have read my mind, or at least picked up on my expression, because she puts her hand on my shoulder and squeezes lightly "He... I told him. I'm sorry, I just... Look, it'll be alright, yeah? I'm here for you and I told dad not to bring anything up"
Fuck it. I have to do something. So I give her a small smile, rifle through my bag and take out that shirt. I hold it up to her, just to make sure it's acceptable, and am awarded with a brief nod and a retreating form of Katie. She shouts over her shoulder "And hurry up! the coffee won't stay warm much longer!"
Her voice is muffled through the wall now "I made it bloody ages ago... I don't know how anybody drinks that rubbish anyways..." Well, fuck me. She doesn't like coffee either? Oh well. I've had to endure worse I guess.
I pull the shirt off I had for pyjamas, replace it with the approved wardrobe item and start to button up when I notice that I packed one of Emily's shirts by mistake. The shirt that we bought together on one of our many trips to Times Square. We ended up buying the same shirt, which is why I mistook it, but hers was an extra small; on the account of her being... well... kind of mini. It's a simple grey tshirt with black old english style writing on it that says 'The New York Times'. She thought it was a really touristy thing to want to buy at the time, but I knew she wanted it, so I bought it for her anyways. And, reluctantly, she made me buy one for myself too because she thought it suited my 'ironic' style. Whatever the hell that means. I pull it out of my bag and slowly bring it up to my face while internally scoulding myself for being so rediculous. I mean seriously, how fucked up is it that I smell the shirt, take in the scent of her, and think that is a perfectly sane thing to do? Katie comes back in and I know I'm caught, so why bother hiding it. She gives me a simpathetic smile, and I pull the shirt away from my face and hand it to her.
"Here, this is Emily's. I... I thought it was mine, we bought the same one and..." I sigh. "I wouldn't usually care but... well... it's a little small"
She takes it from me without breaking eye contact and says "Maybe keep it? Give it to her yourself? Maybe this is like, fleeting or whatever"
If only. "No, Katie. Believe me, I wish it was, but it's not. ...I shouldn't have lied-"
She cuts me off and snaps harshly "No! You did what you had to do, Okay? She's too stubborn otherwise."
'
'
14 days earlier...
"So what are you exactly, Naomi's team mascot? You know she wants Emily, so you're going to try to manipulate me into getting out of the way? You're seriously messed up Effy. My life with Emily has nothing to do with you or Naomi"
I don't think I've ever snapped like this before, but here I am, practically launching my words at Effy like tiny blades of glass. She takes a deep breath, and says
"I know Emily, okay? We grew up together... Look. I'm just trying to save yo-"
"I don't need saving" I interject.
"Fine" She says "Then be prepared"
This chick seriously knows how to push my buttons now. "Prepare for what, exactly?"
"For everything to turn to shit"
It's this, her simple sentence, that I don't quite know how to take. Was this a threat? I don't think so... then why do I feel threatened? I can hear Naomi walking into the hall now, towards the room me and Effy are standing awkwardly in. She peeks her head in, and says in a timid voice "...Hey guys.. is everything okay?"
"Yeah" I manage to croak out, but for some reason I still have my eyes on Effys', like if I look away I'll lose some kind of stand-off.
"Okay..." She speaks again. "Uhm, Emily, she uh... well, she left. Said to tell you she'll be waiting downstairs?"
This is my que to leave. Let Naomi deal with this girl, she clearly has more patience than I do right now. I give Naomi an aknowledging nod and leave the apartment.
As I come to the foyer, I see Emily outside the doors leaning against the big glass window, smoking a cigarette. So I walk outside, lean against the wall beside her and say "You wouldn't happen to have another one of those, would you?" She looks up at me, gives me a weak smile, and pulls out another one from her coat pocket and gives it to me. Lighting it with one of the matches she pulls out from that same pocket, she leans back and blows the smoke up above her head like a rock star.
"I had an interesting talk with Effy" I begin
"I bet you did" She responds "We were never really close, me and Ef. Come to think of it, I didn't think Naomi was... But clearly I was wrong" She shrugs. I can't bring myself to respond, because I'm still so worked up about what that Effy girl said to me. It's strange, she wasn't this way lastnight. She was actually, nice. Sweet even. But the side of her I just witnessed, was like a dog marking it's territory. Or maybe her words just touched an extremely raw nerve, which made it feel like she was peeing on my leg.
"She told me I should prepare myself" I say.
She looks at me then, confusion and something else in her face. When I don't respond, she raises her eyebrow at me and says "...Yeah? Go on then"
I take a deep breath. "She seems to think you and Naomi belong together, and that I should prepare myself to lose you because it's 'destined' to happen" My use of airquotes meant for the upmost sarcasm. Little do I know that something big is about to happen.
"Sept... listen. I... Shit" She lets her cigarette burn and some ash is blown off and lands on her hand. It's as if this simple event causes her to take in her surroundings, and refrain from what she was about to say, because she speaks again.
"Let's go home, alright? We... we need to talk"
'
'
Emily POV
Who knew there could be so much tension in a 5 minute car ride home. There are a million things going on in my head right now, and I can't sort it out. I haven't been this girl in a long time, I've been strong. I've been sure, I've been confident. But for some reason, I've reverted back to 16 year old Emily. The one who was afraid to admit to Katie that I was the one who kissed Naomi, the one who hid her 'private' magazines away in a locked box under her bed. The one who used to get pissed on vodka alone in her room because she wasn't of age to drink in pubs or social outlets. I think, that this 'strong Emily' I thought I was, I think it had nothing to do with me, and everything to do with September. I think, I've grown to rely on her, and not in a good way. I haven't built myself up the way I thought I did. I've left it up to her to build me up, and I've been kidding myself into thinking I could take credit for the person I've become. So, I need to fix this. Naomi was right, I need to sort this out with September. The person I am right now, is no good for anybody. I need some time alone to get myself back together, because it's pathetic that Naomi still has this... fucking hold on me. I can't even hold myself together after seeing her for mere hours since moving back to the UK. Why am I fighting this so hard? I've never really been alone, on my own. So it's no surprise the first words out of my mouth when we get home is:
"I think we need to take a break"
I think if Sept wasn't as observant and clever as she is, she probably would have been completely thrown by my sudden decision. Let's face it, this morning I was madly in love with her and asked her to bloody marry me. And now, not 2 hours later, I'm telling her we need a break. Somehow, I think I'm the one who needs bipolar pills now.
"Sure..." is all she manages to say, before looking at her feet. She doesn't put up a fight, and for the first time she looks... defeated. Like, she can't say or do anything, becuase if she does; the universe will spontaniously combust. So she reaches up, scratches the back of her head and says
"...Take your time, sort it out... I... I just want you to be happy Em"
"You... You're not mad?" I enquire.
"No, I kind of expected this. I have been expecting it for some time now"
I'm confused, so I go to ask her what she's talking about when she suddenly blurts out "I can't marry you Em. I have feelings for someone else. That Effy girl... I met her last night and well... we kissed. I'm really sorry but I think we just need to be friends, okay?"
For some reason, I'm just not buying it. I know her, I know she would never cheat on me. So why the sudden lie? It's extremely kind of her. She walks over to me with big puffy eyes and grabs me tightly into a hug; and it feels like the end. It feels like the end of us, of all the things we've built ourselves to be. It's not bitter, it's not angry, it's horribly sad. But it feels like it has to happen. It feels like we're mutating into something we didn't expect, but I seem to be the only one somehow okay with it. Her mind is made up and I don't feel like arguing with her, because she knows me better than anyone. She knows what's going on in my head even when I don't. I hold her back tightly and start to cry myself, but I manage to keep together enough to ask her:
"Will you still stick around?"
"Yeah..." She whispers "I just need a little time is all"
'
'
14 days later...
It's been fourteen days since me and September took a break, and I'm ashamed to say it's not as bad as I thought. I seem to miss her presence a lot, like when I need someone to talk to, or someone to throw popcorn with me at the TV when that hot blonde girl on a random episode of Bedlam hops into bed with that wanna-be Justin Timberlake bloke. Acting or not, I bet I could rock her world better than he ever could. Not only that, but I'm also ashamed at the fact that the last week and a half have been filled with nothing but thoughts of Naomi. The way her brown hair gracefully frames her face, or the fact that her eyes seem bluer than ever now. She has changed a lot, and I hate myself for this, but I like it. Truthfully, I would always be a slave to the way I feel about Naomi Campbell; changes or not. But this, the grown up and mature version of Naomi... it makes my heart swell. All the anger and uneasiness that has been eating me up inside is because I don't want to love Naomi. It's like there's been a war going on inside my head, banging at the walls of my skull and shaking the cage to my brain. It's like a drug addict, they have to fight everyday to stay away from the high. Well, that's exactly what this is like. I became an arsehole and did incredibly stupid things because I was trying to somehow spite Naomi for showing up in my life again. But the fact that she congratulated me on my engagement, while I know full well that she is in love with me, is kind of... romantic in a way. The ultimate sacrifice. And it only makes things more intense for me.
I have been wandering around this flat that used to be lived in by a happy couple, and it's weighing heavy on my emotions. So, I deicide that I need to shower off the stench of dissatisfaction and go outside. I turn on the tap to the hottest setting and watch the rot slowly make its way off my body, and down the drain into the sewage from once it came.
I learn to accept it then, with the water washing over my like a wave. I accept that love I've always felt for Naomi, I accept that time heals all wounds and I accept, thank fuck, that time also matures things; matures people. Time fixes everything.
Once all remnants of water is dried off of me and my hair, I throw on my red and black wool sweater, cap my head in a black beanie, and head off into the bitter cold known as the world. I put my iPod on shuffle, and am instantly flooded with one of Septembers' rather ominous song choices.
I will keep quiet You won't even know I'm here
You won't suspect a thing
You won't see me in the mirror
But I crept into your heart
You can't make me disappear
'Til I make you
There's something about her and finding the weirdest underground sounding music. Don't ask me how she finds this shit. As unusual as this song sounds, it's packed full with meaning, with emotion, and it's actually quite catchy. Yeah well, so is aids I think to myself.
I'm not quite sure where I'm going, but I go with the flow. Eventually, the cold gets too much for me to handle, and the guys driving by and 'accidentally' splashing me with slush from the road definitely hasn't helped much to keep me warm. So I turn the corner and smack face first into some girl. Of course, me being small and her being a freakin' giant, I fall flat on my ass. She mumbles a couple of swears under her breath, before getting to her feet and offering me her assistance. I take her hand, still brushing snow off my pants, and an instant sensation of heat and electricity screams through my body. I look up, and am face to face with the one and only Naomi Campbell. It's in this moment, that my mind is flooded with a memory I had since buried long ago. Trees, a small fire, and blowbacks flashed in my mind like a movie roll. I remember her then, her short blonde hair dangling just off her face. The way a small drop of water would fall ever so slightly from the tips of her hair. The oversized green jumper she wore that felt like old wool. The way she looked up at me after I convinced her to do blowbacks; how that simple look made me feel like I was struck by lightning. I remembered the way she tasted on my tongue, like cheap vodka with a slight hint of marijuana. How she had grabbed my arm tightly when I began to kiss her neck; and how I could feel the Goosebumps rise on her skin as I did so. How it started out as an awkward struggle around for who would gain control, who would end up on top, her trying it first but me deciding that wasn't going to happen. It seems so long ago when I think about it, but somehow I always feel like that teenaged girl, with butterflies waging war inside of her; around Naomi.
She suddenly becomes aware of who I am, and as her face turns from surprised to sheepish, before I have time to realize what I'm doing; I wrap my arms around her neck and attach my lips to hers.
Jesus Christ, she still tastes like that cool autumn evening.
Huh. This was my favourite chapter to write so far, and coincidentally the longest. I hope it didn't feel too rushed, but I was getting a little impatient myself for a bit of our favourite couple. So, the wait for Naomily wasn't too rough a time for you? I know 16 Chapters feels like a lot but... Come on! I was quick about it yeah? And I'm sorry, but I had to do a Lily cameo in there... Kat already had hers!
Oh! Before I forget! Are there any gamers out there? Like, at least one of you? ... I'm seriously considering writing another fic using The Last of Us game plot... This game is seriously epic you guys. It came out here last Friday and I've already beat it 3 times.
Have an awesome weekend guys :)
...I mean gals.
Violet xo