snape was standin up on da podiam wearin a toga wit leefs on his hed. he narrowd his eyes an lookd all meen at me from sa=acros da grate hall den went bak 2 sit wit da other teechers whu were also werin togas an leefs on dere heds.
"wow" sed jesus " we have a new teecher"
"hes evil" i sed
"come on we havnt even had a clas wit him yet" sed mary margerine
"no hes evil" i sed "he followed me 2 da past so i dont invent fried chikin and to kill me"
den we had dinna. we didnt have anyting fried. all we had wuz bred wine fish and cheese.
after dat we went 2 da griffendoor commen room.
"how wuz dinna?" sed licon
"grate" sed jesus
den i went up 2 my dorm room but i didnt have any pajamas so i slept in my clothes.
den everyone went to bed. expect jesus. so i got up and whent to da commen room lookin for him. den i saw dem. jesus wuz makin out wit mary margerine! he had his hand up her shirt and dey were kissin wit da tungs.
i just stood dere.
abraham lincon wuz asleep. he had on a pink nightdress an a pink sleepin hat.
i quietly went bak to da dormroom. judas was there.
"hey turtle" he sed "where have you been"
"nowhere" i sed an den when to sleep.