"We're so glad you could join us," smiled Aro swooping into a low bow over my hand that was held in his own. And suddenly he jerked up ramrod straight as if a metal wire were stuck in his back and his eyes were wide staring at me. "What?" He held onto my hand and lifted it up to his face for inspection, he went so far as to press it to his nose and sniff my hand, he looked at it afar and then in his face, far and in his face, far and in his face, for about 10 minutes he jerked my hand back and forth. And then Aro touched my head with 1 finger and then he decided to hold my face in two of his hands. All the while I played this out for Edward in my mind wondering what the hell was wrong and what type of vampire ritual this was for saying 'Hello.'
-Incredibly smug extremely male laughter played through my head- He can't read your mind either Bella. You really are special.
Maybe I should get it tattooed on my back for everyone to see; vampire, human, shape shifter, and warlock alike. How does this sound, 'I am immune to magical creatures,' Edward? Jeez you'd think he'd realize it by now, I thought to Edward.
Aro looked at me hard for a moment and kissed my hand delicately before dropping it as he met Marcus, Jane, Alec, and a-weird-guy-with-a-mask-concealing-his-face-who-was-actually-Voldemort's (yes he'd crawled that quickly from under the table while Draco was consumed watching Aro's display of touchiness) faces. "She… well I don't know what you think of me," he said stressing the words to those around him, their eyes going wide with complete shock –though Voldemort's couldn't go any wider, then again it was hard to tell… he did have snake eyes after all which didn't really ever portray much-, "but I hope its good. This is awkward. I haven't felt this awkward since my first date eons ago my dearest Bella." –eons ago meaning when Aro had first become a vampire and dated Cleopatra… it wasn't a snake bite that killed her, she told Aro he was no Anthony or Caesar and he was thirsty but that's another story-
"Aro… I already know what you guys are," I replied and then I looked at the guy with the mask, "well, other than him I know what you guys are."
"I'm a warlock," replied Voldemort testily, he wanted to touch Bella too.
"Oh great," I sighed incredibly unamused, "they do exist." What the hell Edward? I attract every fricking magical being in a 100 mile radius, no probably more. These guys are from Italy and that weird warlock sounds British. You're an American love… like cheeseburgers you attract all those who want to die. Thanks Edward. that makes me feel lovely that you see me as a beacon of death. Well if they touch you I kill them, if a bunch of wolves touch you I kill them… He did more than touch, I thought to only myself thinking of that kiss. And what about you Edward? I sent that question to him. Oh well, I'm impervious to death. The only one who can kill me is you. Mellowdrama king… I'm trying not to be. You suck at it. Nice pun Bella. You bite at it. Oh yeah well you're a… a… human. Ouch Edward, that hurt so bad my ego is stabbed and oozing purple bananas on the floor now.
"Who told you? They shall be sentenced to death," hissed Aro clapping his hands theatrically as if waiting for a noose to appear out of thin air as Alec cracked his knuckles, Marcus nodded enthusiastically, Voldemort petted his snake not knowing what was going on really but imagining kidnapping Bella, and Jane… Jane broke the tension by tapping on my arm and saying in a cute voice with a photograph in one hand and a pen in the other and bright starry eyes, "Will you sign this for me Bella?"
"Uh sure," I looked at the picture of myself turning red from heel to hairline… "Um… are you a fan?" The real question I wanted to ask was: Do you like pain and are you in love with me? The picture was one on my sight with whips and chains but she had edited it with Photoshop and placed a picture of herself in the clip kissing my face and dangling a pair of cuffs in her hand. I wrote out the signature and was about to hand it back to them when Edward hissed in my mind, Play it up Bella. Remember the plan. You attract, keep them entertained in a large crowd, I don't want Alice's premonitions to come true.
What do you want me to do kiss her? If you're not opposed to it… and could you send me a mental picture of you and Jane? A full minute almost passed as I thought to Edward, Men are the same no matter what species. And hell to the no Eddykins… her name is Jane, somehow I don't picture that with this demon-like girl. Damn, I just bet Emmett my Volvo you'd do it. When are you coming here? Victoria is here you know. What did he bet? Victoria's there? Dammit! We're coming now. See you in5.78979089 minutes. Oh and Emmett bet an island and Rose is huffing and puffing threatening him if she doesn't get it back. Oh… well hell… will I have claim to the island? I'll give you half. Three fourths, you live in the boathouse. Damn… okay. Now I got to build a boathouse. Wait would you actually live there with me? I'm taking time off remember, you 'd rent out the boathouse I'd make you build.
I kissed the portrait before handing it back to a blushing Jane. And then I leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. There, you and Emmett didn't specifically say the lips, give me my island, I thought to him. Alice told Emmett he lost and she didn't go into detail. We win. I'm almost there. Just 4.789980 minutes left.
"Are these people bothering you Bella?" Draco had pushed through the crowd and had made it with Luna and Neville at his sides, those 2 pointing sticks at Voldemort, and Draco rolling his eyes. "Hes not a threat guys. He can't beat teenagers."
"Yesss I can," hissed Voldemort.
"No," I said taking Draco's arm through mine. "In fact we're becoming nice friends," I replied. I looked at the sticks cocked at Voldemort that had slowly become hidden within the folds of Neville and Luna's clothing. "Oh great, you 3 aren't witches and warlocks are you?"
"What would give you that idea?" Draco asked loosing his color as his heart sped up.
"Look you guys,' I huffed rolling my eyes, I wasn't that stupid, "vampires exist. I know and its okay becaused I dated Edward Cullen-"
"He's the guy we have to kill," Aro told Marcus who immediately wrote on a schedule he whipped out of his coat pocket that had a list of things to do before 2013:
1. Make up a complete lie that the world is going to end in 2012, put together a load of bullshit about why it will happen because philosophers said it would even though half of those philosophers were wrong about other crap like Ptolmey and the earth being the center of the universe. And watch the mayhem fly.
2. Create cherry coca-cola. (there was a check mark beside that one)
3. Throw around large Frisbees to make humans think there are aliens.
4. Kiss Bella Swan.
5. Kill Edward Cullen.
"You dated meaning you're currently no more right?" Draco asked cautiously, "Just verifying for the rest of the group."
"Draco what does that have to do with anything?"
"I don't know," he replied shuffling his feet back and forth. "I'm sorry. You're right. It was totally irrelevant."
"Shapeshifters exist too that look like werewolves but aren't. And I guess witches and warlocks exist as well. And damn it I don't care what anyone is, like Michael Jackson said, 'It don't matter if you're black or white,' and the same applies to you guys." Draco Malfoy looked as if he were tearing up when Bella said that, then again no one ever really had accepted him for who he was with the exception of the two goons he'd been stuck with for quite some time. Luna smiled and said, "I want blueberries," Neville scratched his head, Marcus applauded, Jane dabbed her eyes though she couldn't cry, Alec couldn't keep his eyes off my chest, Voldemort's tongue kept flicking out of his mouth and I didn't know if it was normal or not for him. "So, you guys want to party?"
"I got dibs on the first dance," replied Aro.
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Young Draco Malfoy watched from afar looking at Bella through a new glass of fruit punch as she danced with Aro. Neville danced awkwardly with Jane. Marcus and danced with Luna. Alec sat beneath the stairway where everyone was walking up and down, the vampires had hired waiters to wait on everyone upstairs and downstairs –it had literally turned into a club downstairs and outside the house a romantic garden with hidden tables everywhere while upstairs was where the girls had a powder room as well as the guys and a little bistro was made up there-, and well Alec was Alec and wanted to look up the skirts of the girls coming downstairs. And some random girl kept taking pictures of Bella from where she hid behind a plant though no one really could take notice of her because she blended in so well, if anyone had noticed though they would've noticed it was Jessica. Meanwhile Mike was down the road in a ditch looking at his mapquest wondering where the hell the Cullen's house was. Voldemort sat beside Draco steadily watching him.
"What're you looking at mudblood?" Draco hissed at Voldemort with a small smirk. Since the evil villain had become less evil or it could be said more of a pansy Draco had realized poking fun at the guy who used to boss him around and hold his family for ransom was quite fun. Voldemort's tongue stuck out of his mouth and flickered in anger but he considered it fair since he had threatened to kill Draco's family.
"You like her huh brat?"
"Yeah, a little I guess. But how can a guy like me get a girl like that?"
"You've already got a better chance than I do idiot," hissed Voldemort smacking Draco upside the back of his head with an irritated hiss! "Do you remember how I look little Malfoy? I'm a friggin' creature from the Phantom of the Opera! If I had your facsse I'd be flirting it up with her."
Draco looked at the masked man. "You've changed a bit you know. You don't seem that much of a badass."
"I've been going to a psychiatrisssst. And its kind of hard to be a badassssh when you dabble in a new hobby," Voldemort replied pulling out a flask covered in quilt patterns.
"You drink?"
"No I make quilt comforterssss for flaskssss…" Draco's eyes cut into slits as he looked at the once evil villain through suspicious eyes considering Voldemort's mouth was starting to smell incredibly rank. "Okay… I do drink a bit…. Ssssome…. A lot… I drink." Voldemort looked over and pointed to the tree where Jessica stealthily hid, "You know I think that treesss a human."
"You need to stop drinking."
"No I'm ssseerious about it."
"Think I got a chance?" Draco propped his chin on his hands as he stared steadily at the man he had used to fear who was now more drunk than Hagrid at singles night when they ran out of bananas and tall women. "Seriously I still have a bad personality even though I try to be better," replied Draco. "What yah think snake face?"
"I don't know if other guyssss like her and have tried but hell you can hex them all if it goes badly."
Draco nodded smiling a bit at the thought of hexing a crowd of men, "I could do that… I guess. It might turn her off but then again it might look…"
"Like you're deranged," supported Voldemort.
"I was shooting for trying hard to impress her but whatever," Draco replied with a shrug.
"Or you could turn over a new leaf," replied Luna passing by laughing in Marcus's arms before the two decided to start doing a series of odd motions that looked like a duck and a turtle dancing, then again it was Marcus and Luna dancing. They were both rather odd. Odder than a purple monkey riding on the back of a 6 legged horse with 2 forks for ears.
Draco got up, Voldemort patted him on the back and watched as Draco took a deep breath and headed towards Bella tapping on Aro's shoulder and asking for the dance. Aro nodded and ran off to talk to Voldemort. "You know, that kid issss really nice… makess me hate him a little but old habitssss die hard. But you know he'ssss grown up again from the sssspineelesssss kid he usssed to be."
"You really have a speech impediment my friend," replied Aro after a full minute had passed from slowly translating that sentence in his mind. "So… when will we kidnap Bella?"
"Does midnight sound good?"
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"Victoria when will we-"
"As soon as Edward steps in we go for it. You got everything Caius?" Victoria's red eyes watched Bella below dancing with the little warlock like she was her target.
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"So you're a warlock?" I asked curiously.
"Yeah but to be honest I'm not liked in my… 'community' of witches and wizards."
"Well how many are there?"
"Half of the world population. They have a few I Hate the Malfoy's websites because our family was aligned with snake face over there," replied Draco nodding a head at Voldemort who when noticing Bella glancing at him waved drunkenly at them with his flask in his hand that threw liquor all over Aro's kimono. Aro promptly began to cry and so did Voldemort who cried trying to tell Aro how sorry he was.
"Well that sucks," I said feeling sympathy with Malfoy. Jacob and Edward's 'kind' liked them. Then inspiration struck me as Draco twirled me around and spun me back into his arms. "You know what? I know my site isn't exactly all that famous-"
"What're you kidding me? Your site has a lot more attention then you think," smirked Draco before coughing and saying, "well I believe it does. I'm not saying I'm part of one but there are some clubs all over the world…" I quirked my brow at him. "Yes its weird. Just continue what you were saying before I dig myself a whole from which theirs no return." I actually laughed a bit, he was odd.
"I could dedicate my site to the Malfoy family and write good things about you and maybe pose in a photo or two with you…" Draco's eyebrows rose up and his eyes widened. "Not those type of pictures. I think I'm going to quit the whole thing… it doesn't make me that happy and it was used in a very selfish way to get back at someone." My heart thudded in my chest and I bit my lip. "I shouldn't be having such a good time anyway. I'm so confused between guys I don't need to add you to the list," I laughed making a joke out of us dancing.
"Who said I was interested in you?" Draco laughed and then dipped me.
"Oh, I know who you're interested in. Its Voldemort isn't it?"
"Bella," breathed Draco holding my hand tightly as he stopped our dancing as he took on a serious note, "I honestly think you need to make up your mind. Not only is it driving you crazy but its driving others crazy as well and its affecting all your decisions. I mean because of the website thing people want to kidnap you." My eyes widened as he motioned to Aro. "I'm speaking from my own mistakes. Know what you want."
"Draco… thanks," I smiled hugging him. And for once I knew exactly what I wanted in my life and exactly what I needed to do to get it. "I think what I've always wanted was…"
Before I could finish in the .098908 seconds I needed to finish my sentence Edward and his family, with Charlie walking arm in arm drunkenly with Emmett, strolled in. Edward came up beside me pulling me out of Draco's arms and saying with a little growl in his words, "Sorry to interrupt I think this is mine."
And I felt Edward stiffen as from the kitchen came the wolf pack walking out in a gang with Jacob growling, "You're wrong for once bloodsucker."
My heart leapt in my stomach as I saw them both and decided right there and then to tell them what I had been about to tell my new friend Draco when all the power went out in the house sending us all into a pit of darkness.
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Draco had been about to see what had startled Bella and the vampire behind him but the lights had conveniently sent him into the darkness.
………Somewhere far in the darkness the snargles crept into the war and killed all of the spiders leaving the grasshopper to fight the spider prince in a final epic battle that would be remembered for a full 20 minutes in the future and then forgotten as the swine flu would be released into the air…. And the snargle made its way to the Cullens house where it had been watching everything. There was nothing the snargle didn't see and the snargle sensed that Bella would need its help soon more than she could possibly imagine. Then again she didn't know snargles existed so it was indeed more than she could ever imagine. And somewhere down in the darkness Luna sensed the snargle presence and said to all in the darkness, "Beware the…. Ow get off my foot Marcus."
And in the darkness the only bit of light was Jessica snapping pictures occasionally at what she thought was Bella but was in fact Alec's right nostril. As Draco reached out for Bella to make sure she was there all he could feel in her place was a quick rush of air and then nothing. Her scream was heard for a fraction of a second and then it was cut off in the darkness.
And oddly enough none of the vampires could see very well in the dark but that can be explained because when the lights had come off the shields around the house and come up magnifying the darkness to something not even a magical creature could see through… well no magical creature but the snargle who was the most superior race that had been placed on this earth perhaps even the whole universe.