Author's Note: Thanks for reading and reviewing. I told you it would hurt. We'll get through it together, lol. These next two chapters are the penultimate ones for Caryl and their relationship. They were so difficult for me to write as a Caryl shipper. I hope you don't feel it's OOC for Carol to react this way with him. Just remember how we as the viewer felt when Rick banished Carol. Just imagine how heartbreaking it would be to lose everyone you love and to think they didn't want you. That's why I felt it was important for Carol to move forward with her life. Don't hate me!

Don't forget to drop me some feedback if you can! The story is finished so I'll be posting a chapter a day until it's done!

XOXO Pamela

7. Down the Falls

She wasn't sure how long they stood there, wrapped up in each other on her front porch where everyone could see. Daryl was trembling and she was having a difficult time bringing herself to let him go for fear he might collapse at her feet. She shushed him, rubbing circles on his back as he clung to her. Then she got goosebumps when she felt dry, chapped lips brushing against her neck. That was all the motivation she needed to jerk herself away from him.

She took two steps back, her heels hitting the doorjamb. "Daryl, come inside. It's freezing and you need to sit down before you collapse. I need to get you some food and something hot to drink." She tried to move to go inside the cabin but he grasped her wrist.

He didn't say anything but his hand slid from her wrist to her own hand. It was as if he was desperate to maintain some physical contact with her. She sighed and pulled him inside with her and led him to the kitchen. Once they reached the stove, she tried to pull her hand away but he just held it tighter, shaking his head.

"Just let me make you something really quickly. I'm not going anywhere, I promise." She squeezed his hand reassuringly and felt the pressure subside, allowing her to break their touch. She went to work, boiling hot water and pouring some into a mug. She then dropped a chicken bouillon cube into it. Then she took another mug and made some weak instant coffee to go along with it.

Daryl was leaning against the counter, studying her movements. "Here you are, fussing over me already." His voice was gravelly and she wondered if it was from stress or his heavy smoking habit. She handed him the mug with the broth in it while she worked on the coffee, preparing another cup for herself.

"Old habits die hard, I guess." She smiled at him. She handed him his coffee. "Want to sit on the couch with me?" He nodded and followed her to the sofa. His knees creaked when he sat down.

"The cold's really seeping into my bones." He huffed. He had a thin jacket on and Carol snatched the fleece throw off the back of the couch and covered him with it. He smirked, "Gonna tuck me in and tell me a bedtime story?" His fingers began brushing the sleeve of her sweater. He had never been so tactile with her but now it seemed he couldn't keep his hands off of her. She figured he was reassuring himself she was not a hallucination. "Tastes good," he said, indicating the broth. "It's been a while since I've had hot food. You sure got a nice set up here." He looked around the cabin, taking in the personal touches she had added, like a framed drawing of the river Megan had made for her one time and wooden carvings Pete had whittled for her. "It's cozy, like a real home." His expression darkened when he saw a pair of Caesar's boots by the door. His fingers froze on her arm.

She chose not to mince words. He had a right to know about her relationship with Caesar, especially with the new revelations from today. "This is my cabin… and Caesar's." His hand dropped away. "When Rick kicked me out, I had no plans, nowhere to go. I came here because I used to bring Sophia here. I knew there were cabins, water, possible safety. When I got here, Caesar's group occupied this area. They didn't know me from Adam but they gave me shelter and a new start. I told them exactly what I did and they didn't turn me away. They embraced me."

He stood up quickly, clenching his fists. "He embraced you 'cause he's a fucking murderer! How could you stay here knowing what he did, who he was with? Did you hate us so much? Hate me so much?"

She stood up and faced him. "I had no idea he had been with the Governor until this morning when you showed up! You don't know him like I know him. He's a good man, a leader, a protector. He would never do anything to hurt me or anyone in the camp." She pointed her finger at him angrily.

"Yeah, you know him alright. You know him so well you didn't even know what he was doing before he made his happy little home here. Why didn't you just go to one of the places we had set up for emergencies? I was coming for you. Why didn't you just wait for me?" He spat at her.

"I was kicked out, Daryl. Rick told me no one would want me back there after they found out what I did. He said Tyreese would kill me and I don't know if he would have stopped him." She felt physical pain at the sight of Daryl looking so anguished. "Everything I loved was ripped away from me. Everyone I fought for would have looked at me and all they would have seen would have been a killer. My only regret was not taking those girls and saying goodbye to you. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair for those girls to think I abandoned them only to die because I wasn't there to protect them." She began crying again, her grief morphing into righteous anger. "Rick promised me he would care for them. He lied. I walked away because I thought they would be safe. I will never forgive myself for not going back there and taking them with me. If I had, they would be here and out of harm's way." She wiped the tears with her sleeve and continued, "I was taken in the very first night. I had a roof over my head, food in my belly, a bed to sleep in. From the very beginning! That is why this is my family and why I love Caesar with all my heart!"

He stepped back like she had slapped him. His face contorted into a tortured grimace. "You LOVE him? Well, I am the biggest goddamn fool on the planet. Here I am, thinking I finally get back the woman I love only to find out she's sleeping with the asshole that helped kill my brother! I spent every possible moment looking for you. Every walker I killed I made sure it wasn't you I was putting down. Every place I went I searched for signs of you. Every person I saw I pulled out that fucking picture and asked them if they saw hide or hair of you! And you'd already moved on and forgot about me. You had a man warming your bed so l can just go fuck myself." He kicked one of the dining table chairs over. He then braced his arms on the table and sunk his head down between them, shaking.

Carol had trouble forming words after hearing his declaration of love. She felt sick to her stomach, out of guilt and of sorrow. How many nights had she lain awake, dreaming of him saying those words to her? She had cried herself to sleep in her tiny prison cell too many times to count. She selfishly wished he had never walked back into her life, making her face those painful emotions she had mourned for so long. He was right, she had moved on. She had gone through the grieving process for him and her love for him. If she hadn't she didn't think she would have survived. She always scoffed at the idea that a person could die from a broken heart but those weeks after she was banished, she thought she might. She never confided in Caesar, Pete or Lilly about her feelings about Daryl. She dared not say his name, it was agony. But the relationships she formed in her new camp helped her heal the cracks in her heart.

She thought about the day she had stopped being stagnant in her despair over losing Daryl. She had been taking a walk down by the small waterfall that was about a mile south of the camp, on the edges of the park. It had been several weeks since arriving at the camp and she felt content. She was contributing. Teaching the kids, cooking, going on supply runs, learning to hunt and track with Pete and spending most of her time with Caesar. As she walked along the bank, a flash of white among all the green caught her eye. She felt a lump in her throat as she recognized it. A Cherokee rose, blooming bright and big by the banks of the river. She pinched the velvety petal with her fingers, much like the day before her whole world was turned upside down. She remembered Daryl, in his sleeveless flannel shirt, holding that beer bottle and chewing on his lip. She remembered the beautiful story he told to uplift her spirits. He had been her champion for so long. But now she was her own champion. She plucked the flower and walked to the water's edge. She pressed a kiss to the rose before tossing it into the river, her eyes glassy with tears as she watched the flower swiftly float to the edge and down the falls, out of sight.

She was ripped out of her reverie by the sound of Daryl shifting the table as he rose. He walked up to her, into her space and the intensity of her look unsettled her. The next thing she knew his lips were on hers, hot and bruising in their intensity as he kissed her for the very first time.