A/N: This time around, I have a double dose of Sully death for you. Thanks to xHouseLoverx for the ideas. Enjoy!
Pt. 1: Great balls of Sully
Tim Sullivan, aka Sully, was walking down the street when he noticed a class of children out in the schoolyard with their teacher. She was teaching them what to do in case of a fire. They had already exited the building and now the teacher was trying to teach them how to 'stop, drop, and roll' if one of them ever caught on fire.
The children weren't really listening, however. Sully looked up the street and noticed his girlfriend approaching from the opposite direction with her partner. She noticed him and tried to pull Booth around the corner and out of sight, but it was too late. Sully had seen them and waved.
Seeing the chance to impress Tempe and the teacher at the same time, Sully explained to the children about what to do when catching fire. He thought for a moment and decided that a real life demonstration was needed. So, he borrowed a lighter from a passersby and proceeded to
light himself on fire. Brennan turned away from the Sully fireball, thoroughly embarrassed. Screaming frantically, Sully ran straight into the road and was nearly hit by a car. He turned around and continued running in a circle, not following his own advice of stopping, dropping, and rolling. It took all the children, their teacher, plus Booth and Brennan to put Sully out. This was accomplished by beating him with the heavy sacks from the school gym that were used for keeping the dodge balls in.
"Well, at least we know who it was," Brennan commented. If they hadn't, it would have been a huge pain to identify the remains. This way, valuable resources wouldn't have to be wasted. They called for someone to pick up the charred remains of Sully, and Brennan gently pulled Booth away from the carcass.
"Booth, you can stop beating him now. The fire's out."
Pt. 2: Pop goes the Sully
Tim Sullivan, aka Sully, was helping his girlfriend out with a case. She insisted she didn't need his help. She had Booth for that. Still, Sully stuck around, ignoring the glares she kept shooting in his direction. He wasn't really doing anything productive. She eyed the latest victim, still whole except for the gunshot wounds he'd suffered.
"He resembles the other victims," she commented to Booth who was standing nearby. "They're all male in their mid to late thirties, short, ugly, and weaselly looking."
"There's gotta be a way to draw him out into the open. He always kills in the same general area. We just need to lure him out of hiding."
"We need to set a trap!" Brennan exclaimed. "And a trap needs bait. Now, who do we know that looks like the victims?" They both looked at Sully, then at each other, each going down a mental checklist. Male, check (sort of). Mid to late thirties, check. Short, check. Ugly, double check. Weaseally looking. Check. He was perfect.
"Hey, Sully," Brennan called. Sully raced over to her immediately, happy for some long awaited attention. "I thought of a way you can help."
That night, Sully stood in an alley. Booth and Brennan were hidden behind a nearby building waiting for their serial killer to show. When he did, it was all over for Sully. He never stood a chance. The killer finished him off and fled the scene.
Breaking off their make out session, Booth looked around. "Did you hear something Bones?"
Brennan grabbed his head and turned it back to her. "Not a thing. I'm sure Sully's fine. The guy might not even show anyway." She pulled him in for another kiss.
A/N: Yea, yea. That would never happen…Booth would never slack off on the job like that, they wouldn't be making out while on a stakeout, blah, blah, blah. I don't care. Sully's dead. Unrealistic is better in this case, I think. Regardless of glaring inaccuracies, I hope you liked these. Thanks for reading!!