Alex woke up sometime before the sun rose, trapped in one thought.

"What am I doing here?"

She rolled over to her side, facing a nearby window. True, she'd just gotten the best night of sleep she'd ever gotten. There were no crying children, people running around in the room, and no toddlers begging to sleep with her because of their nightmares. But something about it didn't feel right.

She sighed. "I don't belong here. What was I thinking last night? I'm no princess."

Something about the night before had made her believe that she was a princess, a part of the royal family. The next morning, she was not even close to being as sure as had been. Was it the level of exhaustion she felt? Was it Odette's insistence? The warm, welcoming looks on her 'family's' faces?

Whatever it was, it couldn't have been true. They were mixed up. She was looking for something that wasn't there. And as much as it hurt, she had to admit to herself that, like at the orphanage, she did not belong at the castle at Swan Lake.

Sure, there were the headaches. But that could have been anything. They happened every time she investigated her past, so it didn't necessarily mean she was on the right track.

She got out of bed, a little stiff. Shaking it off, she looked over to the dress the maid had left before on the wicker changing screen. She then looked to her dress, not much less extravagant, but more worn. She put it on.

"It's not mine," she muttered to herself. "None of this is mine."

She made her bed and cleaned up the room, making it look as it was when she was brought there. Exiting the room, she looked around, trying to remember where the maid said to go to get to the foyer.

She started to walk, remembering in detail where to go. Although she knew under normal circumstances, she wouldn't have been able to remember without asking for help, but she blew off this subtle hint as a coincidence. She didn't belong there, and that was final.

On the way, and thankfully not too far from the exit, she ran into Odette, Eli, and Matthew. She felt a stab of guilt. She didn't want to leave without saying goodbye, but at the same time, she wanted to leave without having to face them. She thought a clean break would be easier for all concerned.

"Alex?" Odette said, seeing the look of disappointment on Alex's face.

"I can't stay," Alex said simply. "I don't belong here."

"But Alex" Eli started as she continued walking, faster now.

"Please," she interrupted, not stopping. "Let me go. I don't want to pretend to be something I'm not. I like you all, I really do. But this is all too much. I'm simply not a princess."

Odette was just about to plead with Alex to stay, but she was too stunned by Alex's sudden decision to leave to think of any words.

Alex made it out the door, guiltily leaving Odette, Eli, and Matthew, who had been silent the entire time, behind.

She walked until she was off the castle grounds and into the woods near Swan Lake. She walked around, looking for nothing in particular. And while she was looking for nothing, she felt drawn to something, though she had no idea what it could have been, like she was subconsciously leading herself to a specific area…

There it was.

It was a swing, hanging by two ropes that were tied high in a tree branch that hung over head. Although the swing had obviously been there awhile, it looked sturdy, the way some old things do, even after years of use. Making her way over to it, careful of tree roots, she sat down, finding the wood to be familiar.

Had she been on this swing as a child?

No. Of course not. That would have meant she was a royal, which she had already decided wasn't true.

Matthew turned to Odette and Eli, who were staring after Alex. "I'll follow her," he said. "I'll talk to her."

Fairly sure she had gone in a generally straight direction, he followed what he thought to be her path into the woods. Like Alex, he felt like he was gravitating to a certain spot, but he was more sure of where he was going.

Seeing Alex on the swing brought back a flood of memories from his childhood. He had played on that swing as a boy. He had played with Alex on the swing, when they weren't fighting, that is.

He walked over to Alex, stopping behind her. "May I sit with you?"

She jerked around, surprised to see that he had followed her. "Y-yes."

She was, to his surprise, crying, if only a little. She was greatly upset by her decision. Quickly, she dried her tears and scooted over to make room for him.

It was a tight squeeze, but, for one reason or another, he was glad for the closeness.

"Would you mind telling me what you're afraid of?" he asked candidly.

"I'm not afraid of anything."

"Well, you must be. Otherwise you wouldn't have run away."

"I didn't run away," she responded, not liking his implication.

"I wasn't speaking literally."

"I know. And my answer stands; I didn't run away."

He smiled, starting so swing a little. "I used to play here all the time, you know. On the shores of this lake… There's a lot of memories for me."

"At least you have memories," she said, somewhat bitterly.

"It must be hard for you."

"Well, it wasn't. Not until I came here, that is." She thought for a minute, deciding it would be okay to tell him what was on her mind, since he was so eager to know. "I feel like everyone expects me to suddenly remember everything about my life. But I can't, and it really hurts."

"Is that what's bothering you?"

"Yes. I feel like I should remember. I mean, who doesn't remember who their parents are or were? Other than me, that is. I feel like I've disappointed them."

He thought a moment. "Alex, has anyone ever told you they love you? Not in a romantic sense, necessarily, just outright told you?"

She thought a moment. "No."

"So you've been alone all your life?"

"Well, no. I've always been around other people, I guess."

"Well, being alone doesn't always mean you're by yourself, you know. You can be alone in a crowded room if no one in it loves you."

She understood what he was saying. She was even glad he was saying it. But why? "You seem to care an awful lot."

"I do. Tell me, did you have friends growing up?"

"Yes."

"Did you love them?"

She thought about it a moment. "I liked them, I supposed. But we were never that close. I just didn't fit in."

He smiled. "But Odette said you fit in here; maybe not in so many words, but she said it. Why don't you believe her?"

"Because I don't know her," Alex said defensively.

"But you knew your friends and you didn't love them. And for all you know, you could know Odette and simply not remember."

"Touché."

"So why don't you want to stay?"

"Because I'm afraid," she finally admitted. He had been right all along. "I'm afraid of a lot of things. What if I disappoint them? What if I'm not who they think I am? What if I can't love them back?"

"Alex, you could never disappoint them, I assure you. They want you no matter who you are. And as for loving them; they love you, and a lot of the time, when someone loves you, loving them back comes naturally. Alex, you don't want to be alone for the rest of your life. I can see that in your eyes. You didn't really want to leave in the first place. Maybe it's time for you to let someone love you. And if it is, let it be them."

Alex stared at him for a moment, taken aback and comforted by his words at the same time.

He was right. She didn't want to be alone. She hated feeling like no one really understood her. And love, real love, was unconditional in all circumstances. Odette, Derek, Eli, and Joan really loved her. And they wanted her to stay.

She stood up, knowing what to do. "I'm going back."

He smiled, standing up. "Go ahead. I'll be along soon."

He watched her go, staring at her waist long hair swish back and forth as she walked. Slowly sitting back down, he thought about what he had just said to her.

Had she been any other girl, he wondered if he would have followed her. The answer was probably not. He knew this. It wasn't that he didn't care. It was just that there was only one Alex, and already, he felt like he'd be miserable if he lost her again.

On top of that, she deserved a family. And Odette and Derek deserved to have their daughter back as Eli and Joan deserved to have their sister. They would miss her terribly if she left again.

And so would he.

Why?

Because he liked her, maybe even… no. He had not seen her for twelve years and they had only just talked the day before. No, he didn't love her. And yet he was drawn to her in a strange way, otherwise he would have let her go.

He walked back to the castle, finding himself happy somewhere in his confusion.

XxX

After an apology for her rash action, which was immediately and graciously accepted, Alex went on to enjoy the rest of the day, spending most of her time with Odette, asking about her childhood, believing more and more as Odette told her story after story.

At the end of the day, when she and Derek were in bed, Odette thought of how Matthew had chased Alex down when she left.

"I wonder how he knew what to say," Derek said, a little envious of Matthew's way with words, something Derek knew he didn't have.

"He's smart," Odette replied. "I don't know exactly what he said, but it must have meant a lot to Alex, because she was back before he was."

"Do you think he might…"

"Love her?" Odette pondered it for a moment. "Well, we argued like they did as children, but that's nothing, I suppose. Do you think someone like Matthew could fall in love so fast?"

"Maybe. He probably hasn't admitted it to himself yet."

Odette smiled. "When did you admit to yourself you love me?"

Derek grinned in the dark. "Probably sometime around when I saw you all grown up. I was glad you had changed so- oof!" He rubbed his arm where Odette had playfully hit him. She was laughing. "I loved you all along. I just didn't know it until I finally realized that you weren't out to get me. I finally figured out that the only reason I pretended not to like you was because of my own pride. I just wish I could have found a better way to say it."

Odette laughed. "You have a… unique way with words. I wouldn't change that."