Disclaimer: I do not own any of the cartoons used within.
Last chapter! :D Thanks to all who stuck with me 'til the very end, and thanks to all who reviewed! These reviewers include Dracozombie, Movie-Brat, Bucking Frilliance, Lunagrrl180 (AKA Casa and some other names), Evil Riggs (where have you been?), Blue Paratroopa, Nukid, anyone who's name I screwed up, and anyone I may have forgotten. Thanks again, guys. And I apologize for the delay on the last chapter here.
---------
"I want this to go right," Mayor Adam West commented to Dean Father on the specially decorated bleachers that had been set up just for the town's most special people on one side street to watch the parade.
Dean Father nodded. "So do I, sir, so do I…" He nodded as he desperately tried to ignore the thump-thump-thump down the street and prayed that he was just having a heart attack. Beside him, Judy took a hit of tequila that she had hidden a small bottle of, completely oblivious to the noise, or the imminent threat to her husband's life.
"Do you hear that noise, Dean Father?"
"No."
"It sounds like death."
---
The giant robot stomped up to the parade. It was quickly noticed (no shit, it's a giant robot!). The children marveled. Some of them cried. The adults were speechless.
The parade float drivers didn't know what to do. They knew that they didn't want to let things melt down totally, at least not yet, but they also did not desire to be squished that day. The giant robot approached…
On the float of the house where the female superheroes lived, they looked around cautiously and tried to seem like all was well as they sat atop their blimp-shaped float. Their president, Juniper Lee, forced a smile and said, "Hey, those guys are coming on a little fast aren't they?"
Bender gave a battle cry from within the legs and their float was punted like a football. The girls went flying onto various buildings and poles as the crowd scattered and erupted into screams of fear. The float itself went flying into… Mayor Adam West's office.
Adam West's eyes widened. "What are the odds?!"
Dean Father reached up and yanked down Scott Summers from his seat above him by the designer tie. "What the hell is going ON?!"
Scott looked around. "Damned if I know!"
---
While the crowd was distracted by that, Double D ran out into the street and put a hook around the back of the Totoro House float. The other end of the hook was fastened to the mailbox he had taken a seat on earlier. It took him a couple tries, and he fell down ungracefully and had to pick himself up again and scramble after it. But he was successful. He darted off of the street like a mouse with a silly sock-shaped hat.
---
Tucker walked into a local fast food restaurant. "Can I have two gallons of boiling oil, please?"
---
The hook did its job in a hurry – it reached its max stretching length and yanked off one half of the Totoro House float. The girls went tumbling off.
Jean grabbed for Trixie, but she only succeeded in ripping off Trixie's clothes. "Ehmagawd! Trixie! Sorry!" She called out. "I didn't mean to! Or, not physically! Only in my mind! Oh wait, then it is on purpose!"
Trixie collapsed to the ground in her bra and shockingly boyish boxers. She shrieked and tried to cover herself in vain with her arms.
Veronica had somehow been sent flying into the low, open apartment window of a young, fat, blonde teenage boy with a cap and an earring. He saw her and screamed his head off in fear.
---
Tucker tried to avoid touching the hot oil in the barrels he dragged out to the street. He looked up to see Robin ordering his forcibly gung-ho troops to attack the robot (with what, he didn't know. He didn't think that far ahead.) Tucker dumped the oil. They slipped on it and shouted in pain at their burning butts.
Tucker man-giggled. "Oh man! This is GREAT!" (He must be losing it.)
---
Mai went to stand behind most of the floats, many of which had long since crashed. Throngs of people ran screaming around her, as did one man on fire. She had just lit up one of her gothic little ciggies, using the passing burning man as a match. "Hm. Chaos in unsuspecting mild-mannered suburbia. How surprisingly not forced and not repulsively cliché." A toddler screaming for his mommy with tears running down his face toddled by. Mai giggled.
---
"Hey! Don't panic!" Robin-following green teen Beast Boy tried to calm the crowd with a thumbs-up. "It's all good, man!" The crazed flocks simply swarmed past him.
---
"FIRE THE MISSILES!" Zuko ordered in his walkie-talkie.
A projectile shot out of Megas' left foot and went straight for the VIP Bleachers.
Adam West tried to wave it away. "BEGONE I SAY!"
Judy Neutron toasted it with her hip flask.
"I hate those guys…" Father said.
(EXPLOSION!) The missile did not send shrapnel, but GUMBALLS! How random!
---
"Hey! Why the hell aren't we moving?!" Bender shouted.
"We're out of gas," Coop replied. "Pietro's high is gone."
They only thing heard over the speaker form Pietro was his mumbling and sniffing furiously.
"And I'm going to get a sub sandwich."
"WHAT? Don't you dare leave!" Zuko ordered.
Coop clicked off. Then the super vehicle ejected Dib's space ship and consequently, Coop. It landed with a thud on the ground below.
---
Scott Summers crawled himself out from the wreckage of the bleachers. Gum was stuck to the bottoms of his feet and the elbows of his fancy blazer. He stumbled over to the giant robot and began pounding furiously on the emptied leg. "SHOW YOUR FACE! COME OUT HERE AND FIGHT FAIRLY! MAN-TO-MAN!"
Pietro came onto the loudspeaker. "Who seriously fights fairly anymore? What era is he from? The sixties?"
Zuko paused. "What does that mean?"
"I don't know."
Bender came on. "I'm leaving. I'm out of beer."
Bender actually walked out of the other foot. He looked over at Scott, who was too busy losing his temper on the other leg to see Bender leave.
"Shit!! We're gonna get our asses whooped!" Pietro sped-said over the walkie talkie. "Hang on!"
There were a few awkward clunks, a creaking, and a pop, and Pietro popped into the cramped space that Zuko was in.
"Let's die together!" Pietro shouted with a smile, still kind of high.
"Face it like men!" Zuko agreed, an out-of-place smile on his face.
"Man-hug!!"
"...No."
---
Peter started to feel useless (because he IS useless) up on the building. "Hey! Why does everyone else to get to have the fun around here? I wanna be involved! HIYAAAH!" he jumped off...
And promptly landed on Scott, knocking him out instantly (I mean, yeah, doing more damage than that, but it worked!).
"What was that?!" Pietro poked one silver head out of the opening of the robot's leg where Bender left. "What happened to Scott?"
"Who?" Peter was looking around.
Pietro was going to answer but heard familiar laughter. He looked over at the sidewalk and saw, through gaps in the running crowds of terrified people, Jean trying not to laugh at how Scott had gotten hurt.
Pietro laughed with her and shouted her name a few times, then when he got her attention, he made a few random, quick, eager gestures to Scott and gave her thumbs up. It made her laugh even harder. Pietro swelled with joy and raced off just as some bumbling cops realized that the giant robot had been immobile for a while and staged their attack.
"What's taking you so long?" Zuko made his way out. "Where'd he go?"
"Hey! Look at that guy!" One of the cops shouted. "Either he was taken prisoner and molested, or he helped power the robot! Get him!!"
Commence chase.
Scott Summers
Graduated top of his class
Now works as manager at Bed, Bath and Beyond
---
Zuko was being wrestled to the cement by at least four cops. More were being called over. The fact that he was shouting threats about burning their station to the ground could not be helping.
Mai, acting weirdly out of character, rushed over. Then, with more emotion than Zuko (or anyone) had ever seen her show, she shouted, "Officers! Officers! That band of wannabe-anarchist teens are looting the Hot Topic!"
The officers dropped Zuko and ran off, barely being able to contain their excitement at the prospect of beating emos.
Zuko got up with ease. A small smile was on his face. "Did you just... emote and act for my sake?"
Her face was apathetic. "That will never happen again. Next time you get caught by police, you're getting the stun gun."
"Is this the part in the movie where they make out?"
"Jokes about cliche's are so out, Zuko."
She then started the tongue-spelunking.
Zuko and Mai
Married one year later
Divorced two years later
Remarried three years later
Divorced four years later
Court-ordered mutual restraining order five years later
---
A half hour later, Pietro was forty-nine miles away.
He finally stopped to catch his breath. "I got to work on my game."
Pietro Maximoff
High school coach of girls' cross country
---
Double D had taken refuge in a dumpster and was rocking himself back and forth, curled up in the fetal position. "It was just a scam. It was just a scam. It was just a scam. It was just a scam."
Eddward "Double D"
Worked as college math physics professor for three years
Resides in Peach Creek Mental Institution
Current state described as "Relapse"
---
In a state of pure joy, Tucker spent a few seconds jumping and down, then promptly whipped out his cell phone to post the happenings all over his blogs.
Tucker Foley
Teaches course on modern technology at Miyazaki College
"YOU! I'll kill you! You and your anarchist bunch of freaks are through!" Robin had a large, pointy, intimidating staff pointed at Tucker's neck. "YOU HEAR? We are THROUGH PROFESSIONALLY!! YOU ALL SHOULD HAVE LIVED ABOVE THE INFLUENCE! WHAT'S MORE, I-" He was stopped mid-sentence and carried off by a jogging cloud of emos (they couldn't really run) that were desperately trying to get away from the police and weeping pitifully. Robin was dragged into the darkness, the black cloud, and he was never seen again.
Well, he was seen again. Unfortunately.
Robin
Became military commander
Killed by his own soldiers in a routine practice on a sunny day
---
Sam was sprinting, her happy demeanor betraying her usual goth-wear. She was dragging a very hesitant Danny along with her.
"Sam, I really, really, REALLY think this isn't-"
She brought him to an abrupt halt in front of the collapsed bleachers. Adam West had just gotten up and was brushing himself off. "They'll be hearing from one of my eighteen lawyers! Can't touch that lawyer brigade! I have them all practice by suing each other constantly!" He looked up at Sam in shock, then at Danny with curiosity. "Who's...?"
"Dad! This is Danny! He's the boy who molested me!"
She meant it as a cynical goth joke, but her father did not take it that way. He took off running after Danny with an old-fashioned flintlock pistol in hand. "I'll teach you the meaning of 'no means no'!"
Danny Fenton
Editor of ParaPorn, the only paranormal fetish magazine (for the first seven years of its run)
---
When Adam West went running off, he left Dean Father and his giggling, drunken wife behind.
Judy Neutron
In and out of rehab, at least seven times
Double D had crawled to the mess of the bleachers on his elbows and knees, soldier-style. When he reached Dean Father, he sat up and brushed himself off. "Sir, I know this is an inopportune time, but could you perhaps consider giving Chihiro House just one more chance?"
Father stared at him, speechless and totally defeated.
Dean Father
Went into early retirement and moved to an undisclosed Caribbean location one year later
---
Beast Boy was freaking out, man! Crowds stampeded past him. "CHILL THE FUCK OUT, ALL OF YOU! IT'S NO BIG DEAL!! IT'S-" He was pushed over, flattened, and afflicted with internal bleeding.
Beast Boy
Current location unknown - no one cares to look into it
---
Way back at Chihiro House, Bender was sitting, contently drinking a few dozen beers. He was a perfect picture of how Chihiro House used to be, except that he was alone and there were a few dead bodies of cops piled on the ground.
"The others should be getting back soon," It was unclear what he meant by this, since he made no move to clean up the corpses.
Bender
Had fateful run-in with the Robot Mafia two years later
Suspected to be part of a Jeep in Jersey City, a convertible in Tampa, and a mini-van in Walla Walla
---
Trixie, still shrieking and searching for cover, ran by Peter.
Peter stared at her, but just as he realized she was underage(-ish), he also caught the sight of a redheaded M.I.L.F. She was cute and had a great body for a woman her age, but kind of a big nose. He was struck.
Peter noticed a car that some freshman was cowering for fear in, shaking back in forth in the fetal position. Peter tossed him out, jumped into the driver's seat, and took off. He drove right by the woman, grabbed her, and thrust her into the backseat.
He giggled. "Heehheehheehheeh. I stole you."
She only looked bothered. "Peter, it's Lois. We're already married."
Peter Griffin
Never graduated
Happily married father of three (which he has been this entire time)