note - some of my friends said i should put my e-mail on here so here it is e-mail if you want to ; - )

Time seemed to slip by in the next two weeks. Before long, my junior year had only one week left. On every wall, there were signs that told seniors to order class rings, or to do well in their college lives. Freshman chatted to each other about being the "older ones next year" and "giving the newbies a rough year". The sophomores looked terribly bored, as if to say, Damn, another year?

Angela and her boyfriend Ben seemed to be excited for the summer, but I couldn't say that I blamed them at all. I was anxious to be able to not have classes in the way of my spending time with Edward. We could spend hours upon hours simply lounging around . . . or kissing, whichever he wanted. When I wasn't kissing Edward, I could also visit Jacob and his father in the summer while Edward was on vacation with his mother. He had told me that she wanted to take him somewhere, to hopefully forget about all that had happened this year. In early August, they would head to the Samoan islands for two weeks. Meanwhile, I would stay home and miss Edward. Maybe some time with Jacob would help, but it would still be a lonely couple of weeks.

"You know I want to take you," Edward had murmured after telling me about the trip. He scooped me into his arms and buried his face into my neck.

"I know," I sighed. "But I want you to have fun. It'll be good to spend time with your mother. You guys haven't had much time to really be a family."

"Yeah, but being with her doesn't mean that it will keep me from missing you. I want so badly to just put you into my suitcase. My mother wouldn't mind having you there. I wouldn't mind having you there. But I'll take you to the beach sometime. Just you and me, alone in paradise . . ." He kissed the side of my neck, then twisted me around to look at him. I shivered pleasurably when he said, "It could be just like heaven."

"You don't know how wonderful that sounds." I thought of Edward and I, curled into the white sands of some undiscovered beach.

But then I thought of the women there . . . "Just promise me you won't fall in love with an pretty Samoan girl when you're gone," I said seriously. I'd be surprised if Edward wasn't at all tempted, what with all of the statuesque women in bikinis, just roaming the beach for their next beau. I knew he wasn't the type of man to cheat, but he was still a man, and I couldn't blame him if he finally realized that his girlfriend wasn't all that beautiful.

He laughed loudly. "Silly Bella. How could I fall for any of them when I'm thinking about you?"

"Well, for one, they're very beautiful girls in very small swimsuits; two, you're a very handsome boy, so they will most likely begin seducing you before they know your name. I, however, do not posses and seductive qualities, and will be at home."

His face became serious, too. "Trust me, Bella. You are more seductive than you know. No spray-tanned girl in string could ever compare to you."

I snorted. "Mhmm. You keep on saying that, Edward."

He only shook his head and pulled me tighter to his chest.

I had seen Jacob a few times since then, our friendship becoming even more healthy. We talked about everything possible, from movies to pets to music. I seemed to have a hard time convincing him that he had terrible music taste.

"Bella, you know perfectly well that Slipknot is an amazing band," he growled. "Hell of a lot better than what you listen to."

I felt like bursting out in a very valley-girl action, and saying, "Oh no you DI-IN'T!"

But instead, I only argued, "Uh, no, Jacob. They clearly are trying to be hardcore so much that they can't manage to find time to play their instruments. Muse, however--"

"Good grief, Bella!" Jacob sighed. "Muse, Muse, Muse. There is more to life than Muse!" He threw his hands up in the air.

"Blasphemy!" I cried playfully. "But yes, there is more to life. Examples being 30 Seconds To Mars, Linkin Park, Jimmy Eat World, My Chemical Romance, Mae, Jack's Mannequin, Paramore, Armor For Sleep, Incubus--"

"Slipknot," Jacob cut in.

"No," I said. "If you're going to listen to any form or concentration of metal, I would suggest some Evanescence, but maybe Thrice would be good for someone like you."

"Evanescence?" he snorted. "What do you take me for, Bella? Some sort of pansy?"

"For your information, Jacob--" I sneered the name, "that is some amazing music. Amy Lee's voice is beautiful, and the lyrics are also quite good."

"Well, Bella," he chuckled, "I think it stinks."

I sighed. "Okay, Call Me When You're Sober does stink, but most of their stuff is pretty decent. Try Cloud Nine. Maybe Imaginary."

"Can we talk about something other than pansy music?"

"Shut up, Jacob."

"Why?"

"Because I pack a pretty mean punch, that's why," I threatened.

He bent over laughing. When his gasps finally died down enough for him to talk, he said, "Please, Bella! Like you could even make dent on me. You'll hurt yourself, darling."

My fists were clenched tightly, though I wasn't even thinking about hurting him. "One day, Jacob Black, you shall taste my utter fury in the form of your broken nose. And when you do, I will giggle," I huffed. In truth, if I did in fact punch Jacob and hurt him, I would be apologizing before I could pull my hand back. He was quickly becoming my best friend, and I would rather die than see him in pain.

He rolled his eyes. "Mhmm. Sure, sure."

"Slipknot still stinks, you know," I reminded him.

He grimaced. "Whatever, Bella. One day you'll see that I am right, and you got it wrong for once."

"Shut up, Jacob."

--

I sighed and collapsed onto the couch. Edward sat down beside me. We were in my living room, and Charlie wasn't scheduled to be back for an hour.

"You seem stressed," he noted. I curled into his open arms.

"I just can't believe how much time has gone by." I traced the muscles in his arms mindlessly. "So much has happened in only six months. I can't keep up with all this. Even my mother doesn't really know about you yet."

Edward cocked an eyebrow. "Your mother doesn't know that we're dating?"

I shook my head. "Nope."

"But, it isn't that standard protocol?" Edward asked. "I mean, isn't that how it's supposed to work?"

"I have no experience in that area," I laughed. "You're my first boyfriend, remember?"

"Really?" He looked skeptical, but I had no idea why. People didn't treat me like pariah, but most guys simply showed no interest in getting to know me well. I didn't really have any interest in them, either. The closest I had come to liking someone like that before Edward was Romeo. He was the reason I had the play Romeo and Juliet memorized.

"Yeah," I answered. "You're the first one I've ever felt this way about." I blushed and looked toward the floor.

He lifted up my chin with his finger so that I was looking into his eyes. "You don't know how big my ego is right now," he said.

I giggled quietly. "Glad to be of assistance in improving your self-confidence."

He pressed his lips to mine for a few blissful, perfect seconds. When he pulled back, I crossed my arms over my chest. "Why'd you stop?" I demanded impatiently.

"I'm not sure," he said. "We could do it again, if you want."

I grinned devilishly. "That would be lovely."

I pushed him back so that he was lying down. I lowered myself onto his perfect body. My hands went to the sides of his face, and touched his lips lightly. But as soon as our skin made contact, I forgot everything. Our kiss became rough and passionate, Edward just as into it as I was. He flipped us over so that I was beneath him, but held himself so that I didn't feel his weight. Yet somehow, I could feel each achingly perfect muscle that his body had.

Before I could stop it, a moan had escaped my lips. I stopped for second, but it only seemed to make Edward even more willing to kiss me harder. He didn't seem to notice when my hands slipped up his shirt to feel the toned muscles that lay underneath the cloth. I could spend forever simply tracing Edward's chest. It wasn't like a body-builder's, but from all the sports he did, the strength he was capable of was evident. When I thought of the physical power he possessed, my fingers started to shake. It put me into a state of awe.

But what scared me was when his hands went up my shirt.

Did he simply want to do what I was doing with him? To only feel the other's skin on their fingers? Or did he want something more? Truthfully, I wasn't ready if he did want . . . more.

He felt me tense under him, and removed his hands from my stomach quickly. "I- I . . .sorry," he apologized quickly.

"No," I said, and took his hand gently in mine. "It's okay. Just surprised me."

"I still shouldn't have done it." He got up off me and straightened his not-so-straight shirt. "Sorry, Bella. I'm sorry."

"No, it's fine," I assured him quietly. Frankly, I wasn't sure it was okay. But either way, I didn't want him to leave. I had done the same to him by shoving my hands onto his chest.

"Edward!" I called. "Wait! You don't have to leave. Please." I grabbed onto his arm. "It just surprised me. I'm not used to you doing it."

"I don't have to do it if you don't like it."

"No," I protested. "It's fine. I just . . ." I took in a sharp breath. "You weren't . . . you weren't wanting . . . you know--"

He pulled back sharply. "Bella Swan!" he barked. "You know I wouldn't ask for that if you didn't want it. I will never force you into that."

I nodded. "Of course."

He reached for the door knob. "Why are you leaving?" I whined.

"I don't know, really. But I . . . I'm sorry. I need to go think, or something."

I sighed. "Must you, Edward? I know now that you didn't want anything else, so there's no reason that you can't stay, correct?"

"Bella . . ."

"Yes?"

"I don't want to do something that I'll regret. I know that you aren't completely okay with what I just did."

"I'm f--"

"Bella," he said sternly. "No, you aren't fine with it."

"Yes I am." Edward gasped when I took his hand and placed it on my stomach, right beneath my shirt. "See? Fine"

"Look at me and tell me that it doesn't make you uneasy in the slightest." He used his finger to tip my face up so that I was looking directly into his green eyes.

"I-- I . . . Okay!" I threw my hands up. "It scares me, all right? But only because the first person who did it to me wouldn't stop if I wasn't fine with it." I was obviously referring to Mike. "All Mike wanted from me was that. I don't love him like I love you, but he thought otherwise. I screamed at him, Edward! And I cried. He still wouldn't stop. At all."

"Bella, I-- I mean, I knew, but I--" Edward fumbled with his words, something he rarely did.

"Yeah, I know. You knew, but you didn't?" I shook my head. "It was scary, was all. And even though it's you - the man I love - it still felt like that. You know that Jacob guy Mike was talking about? He saved me last time. When Mike tried again. Without him . . . I can't even imagine."

"Bella, I didn't mean to make you remember that. I would never want to try to bring up that memory." He buried his face in his hands. "I can't believe I did, though. I'm such a monster."

"But you didn't do it intentionally," I added. "You were just repeating my actions."

"I highly doubt that our intentions were the same."

"What?" I asked. "Didn't you just say that you didn't want anything . . . more?"

"Bella, I wasn't wanting to bring up that memory, but I am a man. I want to be with you that way, I won't lie. I meant it when I said that you were seductive. But believe me, if you don't want it, I won't ask for it. Especially after what you told me." His eyes focused on mine. "Bella, please forgive me. I'm sorry for making that mistake and being so . . . impatient."

"There's nothing to forgive."

"But there is," he muttered. "You know what really kills me, though? It's that some of your only memories are things like that. Those horrid things. You should be able to remember your childhood, your schools, your mother."

"Should I insert some sort of agreement?"

"Bella, I don't want you to live with only these things. I want to get your memory back."

"What?" I gasped.

"You deserve memories. I'll find a way to get them back. I promise you, Bella, I will." He seemed to be reassuring himself more than he was reassuring me.

"O-- Okay," I stumbled. "But how?"

"I don't know . . ." Edward mumbled.

"That's okay. You don't have to get my memories back, Edward."

"What?" he whispered. "Of course I have to! I was the one who made you lose them."

"That was your father," I reminded him.

"So? I still am responsible, and won't sleep well until you have each tiny little piece of your memory back."

"Don't trouble yourself over it."

"Bella." He took my face gently in his hands. "Do you know what it felt like to be a kid and dance around the house in Disney Princess costumes? Do you know what it felt like to go to middle school for the first time? Do you remember the first time you read Romeo and Juliet? No, you don't. I want to give that to you! Please, Bella, let me do that for you. Please." He kissed my lips softly.

"Okay," I breathed shakily from his proximity.

"Thank you." He kissed me once more, just a bit longer. He kept his hands on the side of my face and kept the kiss clean.

"Edward, I said not to put your hands beneath my clothes, not that you couldn't kiss me properly," I shot in as he pulled back.

"Properly?" He cocked his head to the side. "I don't know if I understand that term. Why don't you explain? Or better yet, show me?" It surprised me from how quickly his mood changed from anxious to coy. Not that I minded.

I spun around and grabbed his upper arm. He could've easily slipped right out of my grasp, yet I knew he would let my fingers stay. "Show you?" I gasped playfully. "I don't know, Edward. Not sure I want to."

He spun us around so that I was the one pressed against the wall. "Really, Bella? You seemed so excited to show me just a minute ago. Where's the enthusiasm?" His warm breath flew against my ear like silk, and made me shiver pleasurably. "I'm not sure if I want to show you, either. I'm not motivated enough, I guess."

"Edward!" I whined childishly.

"Fine, love."

Edward scooped me into his arms and placed me gently on the couch. I hit the soft cushions with an "Oof!". He lowered himself on top of me, yet made sure that I felt none of his weight. He placed his hand on the back of my knee and brought up to his hip.

I gasped.

He nudged my face upward with his hand, and began to kiss my neck while running his fingers up the side of my body. I reacted by entwining my fingers in his hair, and stealing a quick nip at his ear. He growled into my skin and began to kiss me more fervently, more passionately. The pressure of his lips was sending confusing emotions throughout my body, but some were more enjoyable than others.

There was a loud slamming sound that startled both of us.

"What the--"

I moved my head to roll my eyes at Edward. It was just our luck that Charlie would walk in while Edward's lips were at my neck and my legs were around his waist.

But, for some reason, I was okay with it. Edward didn't seem terribly embarrassed or angry, either. Because I'd have plenty more time to kiss with Edward, times when Charlie wouldn't be there, when no one else would be there.

In fact, we'd have the rest of our lives to kiss when no one was watching.

Just us and forever.

Chapter End Notes:

In case you couldn't tell by that sappy ending, this is the last chapter, not counting the epilogue, which I am working very hard on also my friend and i made a story it's a one- shot and very funny her username is bboorreedd and the story is called gotta love tv