This is super super super late. And I apologize! I am really trying to pick up the pace and get this story going. You can even ask Fluffernutter8, my amazing beta- I have sent her chapter 9 and most of 10. Anyways, enjoy chapter 8! And Finn!
Rory was a little disoriented when her cell phone rang on Saturday morning, effectively waking her from her morning nap. She clicked the answer button before the phone reached her ear, just to stop the offending noise.
"Love? Are you there?"
"Finn?" she asked, groggy and a little dumbfounded. She hadn't heard from Finn since the day they brought Laylee from the hospital, when he had insisted on escorting his goddaughter home for the first time. "Where are you?"
"At your door, love. My hands are a little full and it's getting heavy. Mind opening up?" Registering his labored breath, she threw the covers off herself.
"Sure, one sec." Rory shot one look at the bassinet, slightly surprised to find it empty. Still, she shrugged it off and headed out the bedroom door and down the stairs. One of her hands was holding the phone, while the other pulled up her falling pants. Her hair was flying everywhere, and she checked the dress shirt of Logan's she was currently wearing, making sure the buttons were closed. She was almost at the last step, about to reach out and open the heavy wood door, when she lifted her head. Her mouth dropped as she saw Finn standing at the wide open door with a camera, snapping pictures of her rapid descent down the big staircase.
She immediately jumped into his arms, hugging him tightly. A minute later, she took a step back and slapped his shoulder. "You jackass, what was that all about?"
"Is that how a mother speaks?" he jested, hugging her to him again. "I needed a shot of a beautiful woman in a rush for the exhibit I'm putting together, love." He smiled, releasing her and looking her up and down. He was surprised at what he saw. Rory has always been slim, but now she was pretty much skin and bones. Her hips had gotten pointier, her cheekbones were emphasized, her collar bone stuck out. He noticed that her chest was definitely bigger, but she looked fragile. Deciding to talk to her or Logan later, he stepped into the foyer, and looked into the living room on his right. "Now, I demand to see my godchild. Where is the lovely Miss Laylee?"
"Probably in the office with Logan," Rory answered, distracted. She noticed for the first time the huge suitcases in the doorway that had been hidden behind Finn. Her tone turned suspicious. "Ah, Finny, mind telling me why it seems like you brought all your worldly possessions on this little visit?"
"All in due time, love," Finn shouted to her, already almost through the office door. Rory quickly followed him, curious as to what was going on. "Logan, mate!" Finn called out, receiving no response from the blond. Logan was so focused on the document in his hand that he didn't turn around to the door.
"He's wearing headphones," Rory surmised, about to move towards him and alert him to their presence. However, she was beaten to it by Finn, who simply reached out and pulled on the white cord.
"Hey!" Logan called out, his frown turning into a big smile when he noticed his friend. "Finn!" He spun his chair fully around, and got up to hug his best friend. "What are you doing here?" Logan knew that Finn's presence was bound to do Rory some good, as the two had become very close.
"That's exactly what I've been wondering," Rory mumbled as Logan pulled her to him, kissing her cheek. She smiled at him, settling in against his side. "Morning," she said to her husband, before turning an expectant gaze toward Finn.
"All in due time, mate. " He frowned slightly, their impatience not impressing him. "Now, where is my godchild?!" Finn looked around, not seeing the baby anywhere in the office. The space was large, but crowded. It held corner desks at both ends, with French doors that opened to the back yard, and another set that opened into the living room. On the remaining wall space, there were floor to ceiling bookcases, packed with textbooks and binders.
"She's in the pack and play in the little library, sleeping," Logan told him, passing him to move into the living room and then into the room that they had designated as a play room, although they had yet to take steps to make it so in anything by name. He quietly opened the double doors that led into that room, and moved to the far wall, only to find Laylee awake and sucking eagerly on the tag of the blanket. He picked her up, bringing her to his level, and placed a kiss on her little head.
"Give her here," Finn demanded, holding his hands out to take her. "Come to Uncle Finny, he missed you," he cooed at Laylee, taking her from Logan with confident hands. Finn's hands covered Laylee's entire torso, and some of her legs. It took Logan a second to recover, his baby looking so tiny in Finn's big hands.
"Watch her head," he reminded Finn, moving his hand to support the delicate creature. "Maybe you should sit down." Logan led Finn out of the library and into the living room .
Finn sent him a look that clearly meant I know what I'm doing. "I've held a baby before," Logan watched Finn readjust the baby in his arms so she was cradled, and smiled. Finn was the only one of the three musketeers who had nieces and nephews growing up, being the youngest of four. In the two years they spent at a boarding school in Switzerland, Finn spent a lot of time at with his older sister, Michelle, who was living there and running the family's firms in Switzerland. "Mate, why don't you get my bags, while I play with this beautiful redhead?" Finn suggested, grinning wildly.
"Sure, Finn." He turned to Rory, who had been watching them quietly from the doorway, and said, "Watch them. I think she might be hungry soon anyway." About thirty seconds later, they heard him shout. "Holy shit, Finn, how long are you planning on staying?!"
A few minutes later, Finn and Logan sat down in the living room after lugging the suitcases up the stairs. Rory was already comfortably seated in the big armchair, nursing. Logan placed a big cup of orange juice in front of her, while he and Finn sat there sipping on water.
"So, what's going on?" Rory asked, looking Finn straight in the eye.
"Um, I, uh-um, I was wondering if I could stay a while," Finn mumbled, holding his glass in both hands, looking down at it. "I kinda left school." He blushed, something they were not used to seeing in Finn.
"Kinda left school? How exactly do you kinda leave law school?" Logan asked, looking expectantly at his friend. "Is your father going to come knock down my door again and drag you back?" he added, remembering what happened when Finn decided to drop out of high school. That incident had gotten him sent back to Australia to spend his last eight months of senior year back home.
"No, he knows. He's apparently accepted it now," Finn told them, looking up. "I went to him and told him that I hated law, reminded him that they only reason I graduated Yale was because I double majored and my arts GPA saved me." He stopped, taking a sip of water before continuing. "I said that I have three sisters who are lawyers, and any one of them is more capable of taking over than me. And that I will be miserable doing it. And he said ok."
"Finn, that's amazing!" Rory told him, smiling brightly at him. "I know how much you hated the idea of becoming a lawyer."
"Yeah man, kudos for standing up for yourself," Logan said, his tone sincere, although still a little shocked.
"I was inspired by the way you quit HPG, mate." Finn looked at Logan. "You followed your talents and passion, and I intend to do the same."
"You're going into journalism and social media?" Logan joked, putting his glass down, his smirk on his face.
"No, idiot. I'm going to follow MY talent, and be a photographer," Finn said mockingly, his smirk just as big as Logan's.
Logan was about to make another smart comment when Rory's voice stopped him. "Enough, you two. Logan, lay off of him. Finn- what did your dad say?" She was looking at him now, relieved that stepping into the role of buffer still came naturally to her.
"He wasn't happy, but he understood. I think he was appreciative that I gave law school a shot, and he didn't disown me. He's investing in my studio, so I assume he's supportive. Though I know he hopes that eventually I'll change my mind." Finn was still hearing pieces of his conversation with his father in his head. "I was hoping that I could stay with you guys until I find a place and get all set up," he added, looking at Rory in particular.
"Of course," she answered immediately, happy at the prospect of having such a lively presence in their home. "Logan will have to set up one of the guest rooms, but it's not as if we're lacking in room," she said, looking expectably at her husband.
"Later, Ace. I got a conference call in a little bit. Why don't you two take Laylee on a walk somewhere, get some fresh air," he suggested, thinking that getting out would do Rory some good. "We can have a movie night tonight if you want, we have all the supplies."
Rory nodded, her face excited. Logan went back into the office, leaving the two of them to talk. "I think Laylee and I need a nap before we go anywhere," Rory told him, getting up and holding the sleeping child. "Walk later?"
"Sure, love. Don't worry about me, I know where things are," he told her, his comfortable personality already kicking in.
"You should. After all, you guys did most of the unpacking." She moved towards the big staircase. "And I still can't find my missing Chilton skirt! Do you play dress up with it often, Finny?" she yelled back at him, disappearing into the bedroom.
Rory woke up early on Sunday morning to the sound of her crying baby. She slowly reached into the bassinet, a movement that had become familiar to her over the last couple of weeks, and pulled Laylee to her. Lazily sitting up and adjusting her pillow, she pulled up her shirt and helped Laylee get at what she wanted before throwing her head back in hopes of a few more minutes of sleep. It seemed that Laylee's internal clock was very punctual; while they still had to wake her for the 3 am feeding, she woke up at 6 on the dot all on her own.
Rubbing her eyes gently, Rory slowly pulled herself into consciousness and looked at Logan who was sleeping peacefully beside her. He was lying on his side, one arm tucked under the pillow, another thrown into her general direction, his blond hair going in all directions. Rory's eyes opened wide as she realized that today was Sunday and that in about four hours, her father-in-law would be walking through the door. She still had mixed feelings about Mitchum. He was the one person besides herself who had the ability to shake Logan down to his core, to undermine his confidence completely. She rarely saw Logan happy after seeing his father, and it was only recently that the relationship between the two had started healing. She knew that Mitchum liked her now, that he thought she was a decent journalist, and that he appreciated her ability to support Logan in his professional growth. Mitchum has been nothing but kind to her in the last few years, but a bitterness still remained in her mouth as she couldn't quite forget his word to her at the Stamford Eagle-Gazette, and Logan's broken expression every time he was told what a disappointment he was.
While his relationship with his children still had a ways to go, Rory could only admire Mitchum's devotion to his grandchildren. Much like with Richard and her mother, it seemed much easier for Mitchum to simply love Laylee and Matty. She remembered some of the more recent dinners at the Huntzbergers', before Laylee was born, where she and Honor would chat about the coming baby while Logan and Josh stared in awe as Mitchum played racecars with Matty on the floor. She never knew if Shira's disapproving look was directed at her or at the fact that her husband was on the floor like a toddler.
When Laylee was born, Mitchum was in Australia negotiating the purchase of his first paper there. He immediately flew home, getting to the hospital a few hours after Shira had left. Rory was sitting by the incubator, her finger tightly grasped in Laylee's tiny fist, murmuring a song to her. She remembered looking out the window of their room, seeing Logan pace back and forth, telling Mitchum about the terrifying hours that they have just been through. When Mitchum came inside, he squeezed Rory's shoulder, giving her a warm smile. "You gave her a beautiful name, Rory. She's a fighter- a true Huntzberger and Gilmore." Rory didn't know why, but that simple sentence had given her more faith than anything Logan had told her the previous night.
Noticing that Laylee was done nursing, she picked up the slumbering child and gently patted her back, eliciting a loud burp. She missed the small smile on Logan's lips as she placed Laylee back in the bassinet, watching her settle into sleep again before lying down herself and pulling the covers over her shoulders, only to have Logan pull her tightly into his spooning embrace.
Logan looked around the living room, glancing at the clock on the wall again. It was 9:45, Rory was in the shower, Laylee was in the bouncy seat next to him, and he was tense. He didn't know what to expect from this visit, but based on past experience he had all his shields up. He had been looking over some financial papers, ready to give Mitchum accurate facts that painted his company in the best light, and he was armed with reasons for why he was working from home and why he hadn't been around. He didn't know what to expect and that rattled him even more.
He made sure Laylee was buckled, even though he knew she isn't going anywhere, and made his way up the stairs two steps at a time, stopping at the door to their bedroom. Rory was standing in front of the full length mirror, in a jersey skirt and a bra, pulling on a shirt. She noticed his reflection in the mirror, and he walked over to her, standing behind her. "What'chya looking for, Ace?" he asked, his voice mischievous.
"Some clothes that fit. You should know that if I'm going to meet with your father in a stretchy skirt and a t-shirt, I'm pretty desperate," she said, taking off her shirt and going in search of another one. " We might just have to do some damage to your black card after all"
"We can go whenever you'd like. Or you can go with the girls or your mom." He stopped abruptly, remembering suddenly that right now that was not an option. "I'm sure Honor or Steph would love to go with you."
"Yeah, maybe I'll call Steph. So, is this good?" she asked, her face conflicted for a second as she tried to push away the thought of the sad state of her relationship with her mom. Logan looked at her in the navy cotton skirt and gray Yale t-shirt, and smiled.
"Looking like an eager freshman. Or the girl who bought bags full of Yale merchandise for a prospective student. " He pulled her into his arms, kissing her. "Come on, let's go get you something to eat."
They were sitting at the kitchen island when the doorbell rang, their eyes meeting over their bowls of cereal. Rory shot Logan an encouraging smile, putting her spoon down and pushing the bowl away from her. "Why don't you get the door and I'll get this one and meet you in the living room?" she said, tilting her head toward the quiet child in the bouncy seat that they had dragged into the kitchen.
She shot him a bright fake smile and he sighed, moving towards the door, taking a deep breath to prepare himself like he always did before a business meeting where a lot was at stake. It encouraged him to think that Rory was getting Laylee, though that just might be a way to avoid Mitchum for a few more minutes. He pulled the door open in one quick motion, as if pulling off a band aid. Mitchum was standing a few steps back from the door, a big bag in his hand, studying something or other in the structure of the house. Logan plastered a well–used smile on his face and leans against the door. "Dad! Come on in." He ushered him in, taking his coat and draping it on the rack. "The girls are in the living room."
Mitchum followed him into the living room, asking how he was, how work was. "You look tired, son," he said, and Logan could swear that he saw the wheels in his father's head turning. He didn't know what to think, if Mitchum was being sarcastic about calling in the middle of his nap with Laylee or actually being sincere . But when Rory came into the living room with Laylee in her arms, apologizing about keeping them waiting and babbling something about soggy cereal, Logan couldn't help but smile a true smile at the look on his father's face. Mitchum has crossed the living room, standing by Rory and lifting his finger to Laylee's delicate cheek, his eyes shining with a look of admiration. "Can I hold her?" he asked Rory, looking quickly at her before returning his gaze to his granddaughter.
Rory glanced at Logan, and he gave a quick nod. "Um, sure- just watch her head," she told him, as she slowly transferred the child into his arms. She watched him with a worried expression, and Logan made his way towards her and wrapped his arms comfortingly around her midsection, dragging her to sit down on the couch.
Mitchum held Laylee on him arm, her tiny head supported in his large palm. "She's grown since I last saw her," he commented, sitting on the armchair and smiling at the baby, and Rory was thankful that he didn't say anything about how small she started out or try to compare her to anyone. "And look at those eyes! Those are definitely your eyes, Rory, even though it is nice to finally have a child with a color similar to mine." Logan was trying to come up with something to say when Mitchum looked at them. "So how are you guys doing?"
"We're getting used to the pace of being home," Logan responded a little awkwardly, pulling Rory closer to him. Sitting down with his father with not even the pretense of business was still odd to him, and he doubted he would ever get used to it.
"Everything good at work?" Mitchum asked, and upon seeing Logan nod, he turned his look to Rory. "And you Rory? How are you?" He looked at her with penetrating pale eyes, and she shrugged.
"I guess I'm okay. Sleep deprived."
"Good, good. You know, she really is beautiful. Matthew was a pretty baby, and he's an adorable child, but she is just gorgeous," Mitchum said, leaving both parents in awe of his words and his enchantment with his granddaughter.
It wasn't long before Mitchum and Logan were engrossed in a lively discussion about one of Obama's last policy changes, and Rory was sitting back, nursing her cup of coffee, lost in her own thoughts. Something was brewing in her chest, and she didn't know whether to attribute it to the fact that Logan's relationship with his father was improving, while hers with her mother seemed broken, at least for now, or to the fact that Laylee had smiled brightly at Mitchum while Lorelai did not even know that she was now capable of it. Despite their special relationship, she and Lorelai did not have the best track record when it came to communication, and a part of her was worried that she had effectively cost her daughter the experience of having her grandmother around when she was young. She didn't know how to fix it, and she felt guilty.
And underneath the guilt, she was mad. Mad that she couldn't have just picked up the phone and called her mother to share her excitement about the news and the progress that Laylee seemed to be making, mad that she had gotten so worked up and, as Lorelai said, pointed her sharpest arrows at one of the people she loved most in the world, and mad about her mother's selfishness, at her inability to put her own wants and needs aside to do what was best for her daughter and granddaughter. But even above the anger, Rory was jealous. She was jealous that Lorelai was forty one years old, and had managed two perfectly normal pregnancies and perfectly normal children in the last two years, children that babbled and stood up in the crib and ran around without a care in the world. And beyond the jealousy, in a place that she would never share with anyone, she was mad at herself, because she had failed and because deep, deep inside her she resented Lorelai, and even Will and Jaime.
The sound of Logan calling her name shook her out of her every, and she looked at him, slight concern and questions in his eyes. "You okay there?" he asked, moving to take her now empty mug from her. "Dad was asking you a question and you seemed to be elsewhere."
"Yeah, fine," she shot him a smile, turning to Mitchum. "What did you ask?"
"I was just wondering how you like the new Prius, since I was thinking about getting one for driving in the city."
"I like it. I liked the previous one too," she replied quietly, thoughts still swarming in her head. "I haven't really had the chance to drive since we got it, but in the few times that I did it was definitely a comfortable drive." Mitchum seemed pleased by her answer, and turned to look back at Logan, who had just re-emerged from the kitchen.
"I wasn't aware that you got a third car. What made you decide on the Escalade? To make up for the Prius's efficiency? Balance out your eco-friendliness?" he asked Logan, somewhat mockingly.
"Oh, that's not ours," Logan said as he took his seat by Rory again. "It's Finn's. He is staying with us for a little bit."
Mitchum seemed surprised at this. He looked up towards the staircase, his face twisting into an amused smile. "Is he hiding upstairs or has he decided to exercise his legs for more than a walk to the bar?"
"No, he went out last night and opted to take the train. Said he would probably be back sometime today," Rory replied, her eyebrows painting a frown on her face as she turned to Logan. "He only took his camera with him, though- should we be worried?"
"Nah, he's a big boy." At Rory's skeptical look, his sighed. "Let's not call in the cavalry until tonight. He's not our kid, no matter how much he might act like one."
"It's hard for me to understand why you chose to make him Laylee's godfather, but I'm sure you had your reasons," Mitchum remarked, none too gently. "Still, he is a very talented photographer."
"He is. And now that he's left law school, I'm sure we'll be seeing more of him and definitely more work from him," Logan stated, his protectiveness of his friends peeking through as he sent his father a look daring to question Finn's motives.
"Another one out of the nest. Is Colin next? I can't quite see him leaving the firm." Mitchum chuckled a bit.
"Nah, I think Colin is good where he is," Logan said, keeping his tone even. "He was always pretty comfortable with the path set up for him. Just wanted to have fun along the way."
"Yes, he was always the most sensible one of the three of you. Even if he didn't have enough personality to keep you restrained."
Logan bit back a comment, beginning to tense up slightly at yet again being criticized by his father. "How do you know about Finn's photography?" he asked, frowning slightly as he thought back through the conversation.
"The birth announcement. The photos were credited to Finn Funtography," Mitchum said, seeming confused at their look of surprise. "It was a beautiful announcement. I have it hanging in my office and in the study at home." Logan seemed surprised at this, but all Rory could think was that Matty's announcement was in the living room, for everyone to see. Still, she didn't know where this announcement came from. I will just have to ask Finn about it later, she thought, snuggling closer to Logan. "Which reminds me, I brought something. It's not anything too big, but I picked it up myself and I'm quite proud of it. And I've got some paperwork that you should have a copy of." Mitchum pointed to the bag he brought with him, not wanting to put Laylee down, and Logan reached over and pulled the bag towards them. He pulled out a big envelope and a Baby Dior box, handing the box to Rory to open while pulling out the papers himself.
Rory took the box, shrugging of the lid and putting it aside. She slowly lifted the delicate dress from the box and smiled. It was a beautiful tiny, sleeveless dress, with a white top and a skirt splashed with a paint-splotch pattern in blues and purples. There was an accompanying box holding tiny socks designed to look as if they were little Mary Jane shoes. Tucked at the bottom of the box in a separate bag was a blue onsie that proclaimed 'Grandpa's Little Princess' across the chest. Rory smiled a true smile, looked up to Mitchum, and was about to say something but was interrupted by Logan.
"Dad, this is…" he started, wide eyes darting between the papers in his lap and his father's face.
"Now son, before you start, this is not optional and it is what is rightfully hers," Mitchum stated, his face conveying that this was not a subject that he would budge on. Logan handed Rory the top sheet, and her mouth fell open in shock.
"I wasn't going to protest, Dad, just to ask if you are sure. That is a lot of money, and I'm sure Mom wasn't too happy about this." He couldn't look Mitchum in the face, watching instead as his daughter's eyes started to close.
"It's my money, Logan, and if want to put it in a trust fund for my granddaughter, there is nothing your mother can do about it," Mitchum huffed, following his son's gaze down toward the now sleeping Laylee.
"But this isn't just a trust fund, is it?" Rory interjected, pulling more papers from Logan's lap. "There's an entire trust just for her education. Did you not think that we would put money aside for that?" There were many emotions written over her face, and she was starting to feel how tired she really was.
"She's my grandchild, Rory. I want to make sure she receives the best education possible. It had nothing to do with you," he said, clearly not comprehending why this was bothering her so much. "You can choose to use it or not when you send her to school."
Rory handed the papers back to Logan, and placed the cloth back in the box. "Thank you for the clothes. The dress is really beautiful and I hope will fit her very soon." She stood up. "Excuse me, I'm just going to be a moment." She felt the tears building up in her eyes, threatening to spill over. The uncertainty of Laylee's future was killing her, and here Mitchum was convinced that her baby would be going to Yale. Get a hold of yourself, she told herself. One day at a time.
Logan gathered the papers after she left the room, and looked up at his father. "We're dealing," he said, not willing to take it any further. "Thank you. We appreciate it, and I'm sure Laylee will too." Mitchum nodded, and the conversation lightened as Logan began to mock him about buying baby's clothing.
It was almost noon when Mitchum left, and by then Rory was pretty much famished. She watched as Logan placed Laylee on his chest in the carrier, murmuring that if she set the table, he would whip them up a quick mac and cheese and salad. She looked at him and nodded, the pang of guilt hitting her again at how natural it was to Logan to just collect Laylee against him in the carrier, and how the slumbering child didn't even bat an eyelash and simply snuggled closer to her father. She quickly set the table and went to find her phone, setting a reminder to talk to Finn about the announcements. By the time she came back, Logan was pouring the deliciously artificial Wacky Mac onto her plate, along with some offending green items he seemed to expect that she would eat. Still, she gave him a small smile, and sat down.
"So…." Logan started, studying her face intently, as he set a plate in front of each of them. "That was kind of nice."
"Yeah, it was" Rory said, shifting uneasily in her chair. She wanted to be supportive, to be happy that Mitchum was so natural and loving to Laylee, but her unease about where she and Lorelai stood, and the thought that she was estranging her child from the cool grandparent in her life unnerved her. She wanted Laylee to have fancy cotillion dresses and the ability to get anything she wanted from Mitchum with a bat of her eyes, but she also wanted her to go fishing with Papa Luke, to have Lorelai make her first dance costume. She pictured building fairy houses in the backyard and bowling with empty soda bottles and a pair of socks. She wanted her to have some of the childhood that Lorelai had given her, not only the ostentatious privilege that Logan grew up in. She wanted her to go to public school and grow up around regular people. More than anything, she wanted her to be able to do all those things. Right now, above any of those particulars, she just wanted Laylee to be able to be a normal child, and the lack of certainty weighed down on her every minute. The idea of having to think about sending Laylee to any kind of school was too much pressure for any delicate foundations she had built since her baby's birth, and she didn't feel like she could tell Logan about it. He would just smile and say it will be ok, she's a fighter. But he didn't know. And the other person she would turn to was not talking to her at the moment. And she was too mad at her to need her, right? And, God, how did it happen that Mitchum Huntzburger saw her little girl smile before her own mother? She picked at her food, and suddenly looked at Logan.
"I don't think we should accept the money," she stated, eyes determined.
"What?" Logan eyes widened in shock. "You heard the man, there is no way we can reject it. It would just be there for Laylee when she needs it for school or when she turns twenty five." His eyes slowly narrowed, trying to gauge where this was coming from.
"Why would he even do that? I guess I get the trust fund. But we can take care of her, we have so far. And we'll take care of her education, no matter what kind it will be. It's not like we're lacking money, and maybe this is some elaborate ploy just to get you back to HPG, to have his puppet again, to keep you away from us again. Or maybe you don't need a ploy. Maybe you're just waiting to get rid of us be the rich boy with the world at his fingertips again." She was being spiteful, and she knew it. It was her mother's hatred toward this kind of wealth bubbling out of her.
"Yes, we take care of her. At least, one of us does," Logan spat out, hurt at her insinuation, though immediately regretting his words. Rory's look shot up to him, blazing, as she got up from her seat. "Rory…" His tone was softer, apologetic.
"No," she said, storming out of the kitchen, leaving a defeated-looking Logan behind, pondering if he should follow her or not.
She locked herself in the little library, curling into a ball on the soft plush armchair, the one she had picked when they moved in and which had soon become her favorite in the house. Tears were streaming down her face, and she remembered that this was the armchair that fit both of them when they came back from their honeymoon and always sought to be closer to one another. This was where she was sitting the first time she felt Laylee move inside her, the first time Logan felt Laylee kick, when she had her first contraction, right after her water broke. She remembered crying and telling Logan she ruined her favorite armchair, where she planned to snuggle with her baby and read books, like she had so many times previously on her own. This was a chair that up until that moment when her world had shattered only held positive memories. Then, it seemed, as she buried her face in her hands, everything changed. Logan had had it cleaned, the stains removed, but it could not remove her memories. And when it seemed like all the tears had run out, Rory passed her finger on the wet stain on the soft material. She looked around the room that was her safe haven: the empty boxes waiting to be filled with books and moved to the big library, the pile of presents that sat in the corner, the bin full of car toys among the empty ones in their pristine looking IKEA shelving unit, and the colorful curtains still in the bag, waiting to be hung up. She wanted to talk to someone desperately, and if she couldn't talk to Lorelai or Logan, she would have to look elsewhere. She pulled her phone from her pocket, dialing Stephanie, wiping the remnants of tears from her eyes. Hey, you've reached Steph, leave a message. She heard the beeping sound, and hung up. A message wouldn't help when she needed to talk to someone now. She scrolled down the contact list, and dialed Lane. The phone rang and rang, but no one picked up. Typical Van Gerbigs, not having an answering machine. Not that it would help me in this case. She ended the call and went back to looking through her contacts, when the phone started buzzing and a name popped up on the display. DAD. She sighed, swallowing hard, and answered.
She tried for cheerful. "Hey, Dad! What's up?"
"Rory? What's wrong?" He immediately noticed the trace of tears in her voice, and sat up from his lounging position on the couch. He might not have been a great father to her growing up, but now he was a constant presence in her life and had slowly developed a sense of his eldest's moods.
"Nothing, Dad. Just a long day," she sighed, attempting to get her emotions under control.
"Doesn't sound like nothing, kid. Did something happen?" He was growing more concerned by the second, Lorelai's words about Rory's condition echoing in his head. She's disappearing, Chris. My little girl is vanishing and all that is left is this irritable mess of skin and bones. He had tried to calm her, placating her while promising to watch out for their girl.
"Mitchum was here today," she started.
"Did he say something to you?" Chris shot out, not letting her continue. "'Cause if he did, I swear Rory..." He was now pacing in his living room like a caged tiger.
"No, Dad. He was fine. Logan and I had an argument after he left." Tears were burning the back of her eyes again, threatening to spill over. "We both said-" She stopped, taking a deep breath. Tears started to spill over. "We both said things and, oh God, I was horrible to him, Daddy." She was fully crying now, hand wiping under her eyes unsuccessfully.
"Rory, sweetie, I'm sure it wasn't so bad." He tried to comfort her, attempting to push his anger at his son-in-law aside. "It was an argument, hon."
"I picked a fight with him and then I said- I insinuated that he would leave us for HPG, Dad," she cried, having trouble getting the words out. "And he's been so good. With Laylee, to me."
"Rory, he loves you." He was confident of that. "Talk to him, apologize. And tell me what's really going on. I mean it. Why are you picking fights with your husband?" he questioned her softly, knowing fighting with Lorelai was weighing on her. He had felt it weighing on Lorelai too when it had pushed her to call him in the first place, despite the history between the two of them.
"Everything is just…" She stopped, taking a deep breath, trying to get herself under control. "So messed up. He should leave me, take Laylee from me. I'm a horrible mother, I'm horrible to MY mother, and I'm horrible to him. And I love him, Daddy. I love him and I don't know how I can treat him the way I do."
"I know you love him, kiddo. Talk to him, tell him what you just told me- without all that crap about being horrible, Rory." He sighed, thinking about how to continue. "You are going through some rough times, honey. Being a parent isn't easy. I should know. I ran away from it the first time. But you're still there, aren't you?" He probed her conviction gently, hoping to have his confidant daughter again.
"Yes, but I'm not doing her any good," she told him in a small, quiet voice. "She's my baby and I'm afraid of her."
"It's amazing how these tiny creatures can scare you, huh? You know, the first time I held you, I was so afraid you'd break." He sat back down, picking up his glass of water and looking at the coaster that had a picture of Gigi with Rory and Logan from their wedding. "I know it's terrifying, honey, but take it one day at a time, ok? She loves you and she needs you, even if she can't express it." He set the cup down and picking up the coaster, turning it in his fingers and looking at the picture. "Logan too."
"Ok," she quietly said before taking a deep breath and sitting up. "I should go, dad."
"Of course. Call me anytime, kiddo, got it?"
"Thanks, Daddy. I love you," she told him. For a long time it had just been a platitude to end their infrequent calls, but now she said it honestly.
"I love you too, kid," Chris sighed, ending the call. Rory sat there for another moment, gathering herself and her thoughts. You have to. For Laylee. You have to get up, and deal with life. She took a breath and sat up, about to get up to find Logan when her phone rang again. Stephanie. She hit the ignore button, not wanting to get distracted by a long conversation, and started composing a text. Hey ,it's been a while. I desperately need a shopping trip- nothing fits! Soonish? She sent it, got up and walked towards the corner full of presents. She picked one bag up, pulling out a plush teddy bear, and smiled. She put it down and reached for another when her phone beeped. She opened the text, smiling at Steph's words. You know I can't say no to shopping! Thu morning? We could do lunch too, I have nothing scheduled until 3. Rory confirmed and put the phone away in her pocked, setting out to find Logan and apologize.
When Logan walked through the back door, Rory was sitting on the small library floor, laptop in front of her as she sorted through the huge pile of presents and made a list so she could start sending out thank-you notes. She decided to set out on the task when she couldn't find Logan anywhere in the house, and the new stroller was missing. It had been over an hour, and she was only about a third of the way through the pile when she heard the back door creak. She immediately got up, and raced toward the kitchen, positioning herself first by the sink and then leaning against the island. Logan stood with his back to her pulling the stroller through the door, all sweaty in his running clothes with his headphones still in his ears. When he turned with the stroller and spotted her, she could tell that he was surprised to see her. She sent a small smile his way, and peeked into the stroller bassinet. The caution was unwarranted, however, as she found herself looking down on a very awake and alert baby.
"Has she slept at all?" she asked gently, following him as he guided the stroller towards the living room.
"Yes," he replied, even that one word a little harsh. He stopped in the living room and putting the brake on the stroller. "She woke up about half an hour after we left."
"Logan-" she started, but he lifted a hand to stop her.
"She needs to eat, and I need to shower," he said, starting to climb up the stairs, leaving her with the gurgling child in her bassinet. She didn't follow him, instead picking up her daughter and making her way to armchair, settling in and starting to feed her child. Laylee latched on immediately, and Rory caressed her soft head, smiling at her little girl. "I will fix it, baby, I promise," she tells her as she gently passed her fingers down the little face. "Mommy is going to get better," she murmured. "I promise."
When Laylee fell asleep, she slowly carried her upstairs, placed her in the bassinet and kissed her tiny forehead. She walked confidently into their bathroom, shedding her clothes in the process, before getting into their shower. She wrapped her hands around Logan from the back, and sighed when she felt him stiffen.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she whispered, again and again, until he relented and turned in her arms.
"I know." He placed a kiss on the top of her head. "And I'm sorry too- I shouldn't have said-"
"No." She stopped him with a finger to him mouth. "You were right about the way I am with her," she said quietly. It was something that she had been thinking about nearly constantly since Laylee came home, but hearing him express it had cut her deeply.
"I wasn't, Rory. You are trying, and doing a lot. And it wasn't fair of me to say otherwise- Laylee does need her mother." He ran a hand through his wet hair. "But- Ror- Do you-" He had a hard time getting the words out. "Do you really think that I will leave you? Either of you? Ever?"
"I don't, Logan. I really don't think you will, and I'm sorry for saying that I did," she told him honestly, pushing him against the wall, pushing herself against him.
He put a hand on her shoulder, pushing her back slightly so she was not flush against him. "You can't fix everything with sex, Rory. You have to let me in. Talk to me, don't just pick a fight. You can't just snap at me all the time, and then come back later, apologize and expect me to be ok with it." He looked into her eyes, her face now wet from the water falling around them. "If the money from my dad really bothers you that much than we can figure something out," he said, sending her a small smile. "But I have a feeling that's not it."
She sighed, and looking back at him, trying to avoid the tears again. "It's not that. It's- it's this whole mess with my mother." It felt odd to hear out loud instead of in the endless swarm of recrimination and confusion in her head. "I don't know how to fix that. And he saw Laylee smile, and she doesn't even know she smiles and I want her to go fishing with Luke and to wear dresses that my mother made and to have Christmas in Stars Hollow and-"
"Ace! She will, she will." He pulled her into his arms. "We'll figure out this thing with your mom. Together. You need to have a more positive attitude- to everything. "
"I don't know that we can. I think I really screwed up this time," she sobbed into his chest.
He placed a finger under her chin and pushed her face up so she was looking into his eyes. "That's not the right attitude, Ace. The right attitude is 'yes, we'll figure it out'. Your mother loves you, and maybe we all will need to give up on some of our pride, but we're family- we'll figure it out."
She knew he was right. She smiled at him, for keeping her confident, for always having her back, for loving her. "I love you," she told him simply.
"Now how about that make up sex?" He cheekily asked, pushing her against the glass on the shower wall, kissing her hungrily. She wrapped her hands around his neck, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. He reached to grab her leg and bring it around him when the shrill cry of a baby could be distinctly heard over the tumult of the water and through their haze of arousal. Logan sighed and dropped his head to the crook of her neck. "Crap."
"Sorry, Mac," Rory said, suppressing a smile. She grabbed a fluffy towel to wrap around herself and walked towards their bedroom, leaving him in the now cold shower, his forehead pressed against the cool glass.
Later that night, all three Huntzbergers were sound asleep when the phone rang. Hey, you've reached Logan and Rory, we try and check this thing every once in a while, but no promises. The beep sounded, and after it, a sigh could be heard.
"Rory? Hi, it's Luke. Listen, I know you and your mom had a big fight. But she misses you, kid. Anyways, I hope Laylee is doing well. Bye." He was never good in the talking department, usually leaving it as Lorelai's job, but some things just needed to be done.
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Thank you for reading and sticking with this story, even if I am a horrible updater. Lots of love!