TO NEVER LOSE
By Reverse

Chapter 4 - Insanity Within Torture

The darkness was nothing compared to the sting of the light when it was flashed after so long. After what seemed like endless days cramped within the cell, it was all torturous. I still didn't make a sound. It was all I had to hold onto; don't move, don't make a sound.

Whatever amount of time in the damp and the dark was spent wasted and cramped. But the light was more torturous than the face that brought it to my level.

Eyes like blood and darkness were the first thing I saw. I was tempted to scream, so I chomped down on my tongue. The rusty flavor of my own blood brought me new awareness. My eyes fought to withstand the pain of sudden light

I had been cramped in the same position for so long that my muscles screamed even when Itachi took my hand. Both his lily hands caressed my worn ones, the dirt and dried blood crusted over my fingers transferred over to his. Holding my index finger in both hands he let my other hand fall. I didn't even raise a finger.

"What did the scroll say?" He asked, my finger twisted within his own.

I retorted. "I don't know. I don't want to know."

I bit my lip in a torrent of furry as he easily snapped it. Though I fumed outwardly and panted, I didn't break eye contact.

Never stop smiling. Naruto's words echoed in the torturous cavern of my mind. I remembered all the fights where his very faith unnerved the memory. I had no faith to give; only insanity. It was enough for Itachi though; my insane pleasure would come to my use.

He stated his question again, his voice ringing clearly like pure water smothering my fire. "What did the scroll say?" It was an empty demand. I shook my head with the flame of defiance meeting his cool refreshing gaze. There was no ice like Sasuke's stare, but rather a flowing magnificent force that could make or break you.

Another twist, my middle finger, splintering slowly to sever the skin, the pain was the intended torture. This cell was already inhibiting my chakra, these wounds would not be healed, and it drove me further. I made no face of pain, I smiled. I smiled brilliantly with the excitement and adrenaline. I never screamed… my noise came in rasping, desperate laughs and noises of pleasure and enjoyment.

The more pain, the more excited I got. Then the pain stopped.

I stopped my maniac laughter and stared calmly at the Uchiha. He had picked up my other hand before putting it down.

I kunai was against my throat in less than a heartbeat. My back was against the wall, and I couldn't move even if I wanted to.

Agony still ripped through my body and I was sent into gentle shivers from the pain. "Are you going to kill me?" I asked calmly. He didn't appear shocked.

"What did the scroll speak of?" He asked.

"Many things," I began. "Are you going to do it quickly and step back, or slowly?"

He shot me a look of impatience. "Such as?"

"Either way you'll avoid the main stream of blood." I mused, mildly directing my attention up. Itachi thrust my forehead into the wall with his hand.

I still refused to play by his rules. "Either way; you should remove your cloak. Those things look well made and hard to come by. I promise to make a mess."

"Is that all you promise?" He asked, a little bit of interest in his tone. He slapped me for measure and I blinked several times before looking back up at him.

Oh no, I promised much more. I promised to make you find suffering, I promised to bring your demise and paradise, and you can know nothing of what I promised.

"That's all I'll tell you." I said, there is no poison in my tone.

He smirked, just a little and replied evenly. "Then I should kill you; you're worthless."

"On the contrary," I object. I won't beg for my life, he doesn't deserve a mercy plea. "I come at too high a cost."

The kunai is pressed a little harder, the edge caressing my neck like the lips of a lover; all cold and steel. "You aren't willing to pay are you, Itachi?"

"Why should I pay when I can just force it from you?" He asked.

I laughed; a chime of merriment in the dark crippling place I was in. "I have nothing to lose, and I fear nothing. What am I?"

He almost growled but chose to shove me against the wall and throw me to the floor. Then he locked the cell and walked slowly and deliberately away. Maybe he wanted me to hate him. I will give him not the luxury of power over me. His existence in my life has only the power to end it, not change it. Nobody holds any power in my life to change it; not unless it is given. It is the ultimate defeat to allow people to change your life when you don't want them to. It's a power that can bring any enemy to their knees; only one man I have ever met can mold and use this terrifying and miraculous power.

And that powerful miracle of a man is not Itachi. The elder Uchiha is barely seen to me as a man; he possesses to much the qualities of a boy.

"Itachi?" I address. His step didn't falter, but I knew he had heard me. "I am myself."

Even with the knowledge to break me; even as armed as he is. He cannot succeed. He is not man enough to understand.

It may have been a full two days before someone ventured down to see me. I lay on my back, flat on the ground while moving to prevent cramping and pain. It was barely any use. My hand had already swollen to uselessness.

This time it was the blonde. The clay sculptor and self proclaimed artist; this was Deidara. He held in his hands a tiny delicate white bird. A second one perched on his shoulder. I was too exhausted to care.

Something was placed at my lips and water was poured into my mouth, I sputtered as I tried desperately to swallow it slowly. When it was taken away I lay my head back down and stared at the ceiling. Deidara leaned over me and ran a finger over my mouth; opening it.

I couldn't care. I couldn't bring myself to move I was so weakened. "Nobody survives Itachi."

I did, I wanted to whisper but my strength is something I knew I had to save.

"So they sent me to see what was wrong with you." He said slyly. I didn't trust him but I did nothing.

He looked a little disappointed at lack of fight. His unique "Un" sound was said a little more forcefully, angrily as he fished his sentences.

A little bird the size of a thumb was placed in my mouth. I was careful not to swallow it; I knew that much at least. "What did the scroll say?" Ah, the mandatory question.

"I will blow your voice-box out if you won't tell me." I just stared at him as if he was alien.

Still careful not to swallow the bird; I spoke slowly. Exhaustion was pegging me down. "Was Itachi too embarrassed to tell you?"

"Tell me what?" He growled. He was already beat; I had already pegged him a jealous of the former Konoha noble; now I had proof and a weapon against him.

My eyes fluttered open, lashes blinking away stinging water that came from pain and what could have been insomnia. "You know what?" I whispered. "Blow my voice-box out. I dare you."

I could see it on his face he wanted so badly to blow me to smithereens and ash; but the jutsu he made was not for explosives.

The bird broke into shatter-glass in my mouth, sharp tearing pieces that made their way through my sinuses and fluttered from my nostrils like ash from burned paper. Like the scroll I had destroyed.

Every little piece burned like the fire of explosives, I couldn't help but wail and pant as the process stung. It felt like knifes made from iron branders and dulled my sense of smell. I was bitter about it.

"Do that again!" I demanded. "A few more times and I won't smell the filth of this place."

"You really are a fucked up angel. I don't see why Itachi wants you when he could have any whore." Deidara spoke.

I smirked, my nose was still burning, but I would be left alone in the pain for maybe days so I clung to this human connection while it existed. "Men always want what they can't get."

He slammed his hands down so hard on my hips I feared they might have snapped and broken. The blood pooled and I could already feel the bruising starting; made faster and darker by lack of nutrition and dehydration. "Maybe I should wreck you, damage you!"

His growl was met by my disproving glance. "Pointless, Uchiha's try to always get what they want. You are an idiot. He's still get what he wants."

"In fact, he'll probably flaunt he go it better." I cringed slightly, but remained impassive outwardly. My minor flints of emotions would not ruin what I was building.

Deidara looked extremely angry now, and defiantly annoyed. Though if he was allowed to kill me; he would have already done so …I wasn't terribly worried about him killing me. "You think you can deny him?"

"Deny? No. But that's not what I would do. Not to a true Uchiha, that's suicide." I spoke evenly. Enjoying the rare power a defenseless being could hold against a member of the most feared criminal organization in the world. Not all power is in weapons and technique; some of it is in emotional and internal strength. Undeniable power lies in determination and intelligence.

"You seem suicidal." He observed with a bitter tone. His personality was his weakness even though it echoed his craft. I wondered if everybody's strength is also their weakness. I wondered if strength is only something in comparison to somebody else, a measure; but not a quality.

"I know how to play the cards. Even against one of the Uchiha." I knew to incorporate Itachi into this. His jealousy would bypass my mention of ploys against him. For a genius; he wasn't all that bright.

He just glared demanding I go on. "Uchiha's get whatever they want. It's a fact, not a puzzle."

"It's a fact that can be defeated by a puzzle. You show the Uchiha what they want really isn't something they want. You become an object of repulsiveness." I said softly, he was hanging onto my every word. "If its power they want, show them the weakness and flaws in it. If it's to torture, give them pleasure. If its pleasure they want, gift with indifference."

He didn't understand the last part, but he seemed to grasp the idea I was portraying. The blonde, almost gently, held my head as he gave me the last of the water before departing. There was an obvious smirk and plan in his manor and I added an alliance to Deidara as a possibility in the future; but one of the non-dept varieties. I had had enough of my depts. and bonds. He would not be hard to control.

There was hope in the flaws I could exploit. I smiled an almost real smile for the first time in years.

I was aching to the bones and nearly unconscious from pain but I would hold out. I would survive for as long as I could under the circumstances. Even if just to spite them.

As always. Review and I'll be more motivated to write. I was gonna let this chapter go till Monday, but you've all been really supportive.

I like my Deidara. He's fun to write. I can't wait to introduce Kisame. More plot in next chapter. Sakura tries to set them against themselves and Itachi….

Itachi gets what he believes to be a bright idea…… do you even want to know?... …. ….