Author's note- I did a chapter like this in "Gaining Wisdom," I just felt like it was needed just as much here.
Kitty Pryde2- Thanks, an early merry Christmas to you.
cheerleaderchick- Yeah, he does have very rare moments of intuitiveness.
The Uncanny R-Man- She'll tell him, probably next chappie. And don't worry, we'll see how everyone's favorite dragon reacts. (evil laughter)
NaijaStrawberrie- My ex-best friend went through that this past year, only she didn't have a supportive family, or a good boyfriend. So I was her coach, and the baby's God-mother, and I threw her a baby shower, andmy parentslet her stay with me, sat with her through 15 hours of labor, drove her to half of her appointments, then she tried to take my boyfriend! Arrg! Okay, enough ranting, I'm calm.
The point I was getting to was that I can sort of feel for Kitty, and I may be in a dark place right now with my writing, I do apologize to everyone for the lack of happy fluffiness lately, I think that's why I haven't been updating "F.M.T.W."lately.
Waiting
Well, I just heard the news today
It seems my life is going to change
-Creed
Pete stared at the ceiling. So far he had counted twenty-eight lines. He groaned rolling over. Why did this happen now? Unbidden Scicluna's words to him came back.
("Wisdom, you act like we're so different. Once, you were my best agent, no one had your success rate, or your body count. Now you're a white hat? People like us don't change. Eventually, you'll long for these days again. Long for the freedom to do this job again.")
Pete wondered if she had been right. Maybe he did the job so well because killing was in his blood. Maybe his quest to redeem what was left of his soul was just frivolous, maybe there was nothing left. He looked at the spot next to him where Kitty should have been. He loved her, and would do anything for her. He'd kill for her in a heartbeat, and die just as fast…but kids?
Pete had always promised himself that he would never have a child. His life was too unsure, then there was the whole mutant thing. Did he really want to bring a child into that? Mostly, it was fear. His own father had screwed up so bad, he was afraid of doing the same.
It really boiled down to one question. Did he love Kitty enough to try? The answer was obvious... why then was it so scary? He was twenty six years old and an agent at that. He had seen things that would scare most people out of years of their lives but this, the mere thought of having a child was enough to bring the former agent to his knees.
He closed his eyes hoping that he might be able to get a little sleep, and hoping that she'd finally get her courage up enough to tell him so that they could discuss it and talk about what they were going to do.
I looked weak my eyes they gave it all away
I don't deny it
I still haven't found it
I proudly wear the scars
I've challenged every crutch so far
Please don't blame me
Please don't blame me
'Cause I'm in over my head, in over my head
-Furslide
Kitty paused outside of the door taking a deep breath trying to slow the beating of her heart. She knew that getting so worked up wasn't good for her, or for the baby. She leaned against the door trying to sort out what she wanted to do. She knew she had to tell him and she needed him to be there for her but she was so scared. It didn't help that Kitty knew full well how Pete felt about children.
Was she ready to have a child herself? Kitty had always loved children but she was only eighteen, she hadn't even graduated yet. Well, she reasoned, ready or not this baby was coming. Now the only question was: was she going to keep the baby or give it up? She knew that giving her baby up would kill her but if Pete truly didn't want to have a child she wouldn't want their baby to grow up knowing that it's father never wanted him or her.
She opened the door and looked down at Pete who was fast asleep. She stood just watching him for a minute. He looked troubled. His hand laid in the spot she usually was, as though reaching out for her. She sat down on the bed and he woke up. Well, it was now or never.