Rick Grimes patrolled the perimeter of the prison yard for the second time today-as he did everyday since the Dixons' return from their unfortunate encounter with the Governor, Phillip Blake. If it wasn't for the despotic leader, Woodbury would have been just another group of survivors like them. As it stood now, that community was a threat to their very existence, even more so than the walkers.

The walkers were not as hardy as they had appeared when the group first took refuge in the prison. Rick thought they now looked….emaciated. Was it possible that there wasn't enough of the living left to feed the dead? And though the walkers were almost skeletal, the numbers had increased tenfold. He was seriously concerned that the fences might give way under the sheer volume of the things if they realized live food resided within these chain-link fences. He double- and triple-checked multiple patches even though he had Daryl reinforce them yesterday. He couldn't take any unnecessary risks with the integrity of the barrier that they relied on to keep the walkers… or other intruders out. To be honest, a man or woman could get in with a little effort but maybe it would be enough to hold them back long enough to be noticed and deterred.

Merle Dixon was convinced that if Blake still lived, he would be coming for Amanda. Dixon had stabbed him with his makeshift bayonet but reluctantly admitted to his brother that the blade probably glanced off a rib; Daryl then told Rick. Unless the man bled to death before he could find help, it wasn't a killing wound. The older Dixon also believed that the Governor was a soulless bastard to that wouldn't go down that easy.

Whatever differences Martinez had with Merle, this wasn't one. Phillip Blake was ruthless and would let nothing stand in the way of getting what he wanted. Both men, former soldiers of Woodbury, had seen evidence of this first hand. According to them, even in this apocalyptic era when the number of the living was dwindling rapidly, human life meant nothing to the leader of Woodbury. Caesar agreed wholeheartedly with Dixon that Blake would be coming for Amanda and her baby and no one would be spared in his pursuit…not the women…not the children. The Governor would take what he wanted and annihilate everything in his path.

The majority of the prison group looked to him for the answers. Rick rubbed his temples hard, trying to massage away the nagging headache before it could take root. He hated making decisions that affected the entire group's safety and well being but he didn't know what else to do. If the group was safe, his children were safe. So, he shouldered the responsibility somewhat reluctantly and tried not to think too far ahead into the future. Day by day was about all he could manage right now and today he would gather "his" people to discuss what needed to be done to shore up their defenses against potential threats.

Since the return of the Dixon brothers, the mood in the prison had been rather tense and it didn't have anything to do with a possible attack from Woodbury. The hostility between Merle Dixon and Caesar Martinez was pervasive and palpable, practically affecting everyone in the prison, for neither man tried to hide their newfound dislike and distrust of each other.

But that wasn't all. Not only were those two men on the outs with each other, Rick noted that something was wrong with Rowan and Merle. They were still together but the strain in their relationship was obvious. Dixon barked at anyone who dare approach him. Rowan became very quiet and went about her daily works as if she was on auto-pilot. Rick could only assume that Dixon's violent temper weighed doubly heavy on her mind since she carried his child. But didn't she know he was a loose cannon beforehand… from Woodbury?

As for Daryl and Beth—things weren't rosy there either. The surly redneck became even more so and had a permanent scowl fixed on his face while the young woman looked like she was on the verge of tears…constantly. Rick was afraid to even speak to her for fear she might let those tears loose and he would be the one that had to deal with it.

His son Carl never ever stopped complaining about having to watch his sister to anyone who would listen and even to those who tried to tune him out. He wasn't giving up his quest to be rid of Judith any time soon. And when he wasn't whining about that he was just downright grumpy. Except…except when he was talking to Beth. He would become overly helpful and accommodating anytime the youngest Green girl was in the room. Carl was obviously aware of the discord between Beth and Daryl and was taking full advantage of the situation. Rick decided to chalk his son's moods up to inopportune arrival of full blown puberty; however that didn't make the situation any easier to deal with.

And then there was Amanda. He sighed. Amanda. He really thought by letting her go that he would be able to concentrate on the important tasks of keeping everyone healthy and fed…but that kind of thinking of backfired. Rick actually found himself worrying about her even more because he wasn't the one there when she needed someone. In fact, his feelings had grown. It had almost killed him when she turned to Martinez for comfort knowing that there was no one to blame but himself. Now that the other man's loyalties were suspect, Rick had another reason to be concerned for her safety. Did the Martinez really have Amanda's best interests at heart or was he just a very good actor?

Oh, and Rick couldn't forget the prisoners. What the hell were they going to do with them? Do they let the three join their group? Could they be trusted? It was the damned "Randall" thing, like at the Greene farm, all over again but times three. They never did settle that. Rick knew that he couldn't let them go. What if they ran back to Woodbury? Tyreese and his sister inadvertently found an obscure passage into the prison and they could lead the Governor right back into the heart of their refuge. The lower level could be filled with Woodbury soldiers before they knew what hit them. Rick's group didn't have the manpower to cover the entire facility.

And…the prisoner that the Dixons brought back, the woman…Karen…Rick's head pounded harder at the thought of his most aggravating captive. There was no doubt in his mind she would run straight to Woodbury to get her son and return to the prison with him and half of Woodbury in tow. She had said as much to him—that the prison was the perfect place and she and Noah would "fit" right in. She also said Beth and Noah would make a great couple. Really? Who could think of matchmaking at a time like this? He snorted. How would Daryl handle a little competition?

Rick shook his head at his own helplessness. His inability to separate himself from the emotional stress of everyone else's problems prevented him from thinking clearly like a sharp and able leader should. If only he could leave. Run away. He chuckled bitterly to himself. He couldn't do it. It just wasn't in him. For whatever reason, he had the innate need to make everything okay whether it was in his power or not…a recipe for failure for sure.

A low rumble in his stomach reminded him that he hadn't eaten breakfast…or lunch; He decided as he shielded his eyes from the midday sun. Wearily, he headed back to the prison hoping there was something left to eat. Of course there would be. Carol would have made him a plate and put it aside. She always did. She made sure everyone had enough to eat. Maybe it wasn't much and maybe it wasn't that tasty but it was at least something.

Amanda dried her hands on her shirt and smiled somewhat with satisfaction. "All done….and I only broke two dishes," she said to the scrawny orange kitten peering out from under the steel prep table in the kitchen. "But one was your fault. You shouldn't leave your bowl in the middle of the floor where someone could step on it."

She had volunteered to do the dishes by herself so Carol or Beth could be freed up to help with other duties. She hadn't been carrying her weight around the prison for some time and the guilt lay heavily on her. After wallowing in self-pity for almost two weeks, she became bored…and ashamed of herself. She hadn't been thinking straight since her "trip" to Woodbury and when she looked back on her behavior she realized how selfish she'd become. That wasn't her way. Maybe it was her daddy's way but it wasn't hers.

So with steadfast resolve, Amanda had dragged herself out of bed, took a cold shower-because cold was the only option, and went to see what she could do to help. Her dad shot down any ideas she had about taking watch. Her dad still held some old-fashioned ideas about what women could do when pregnant…chauvinistic might be a better word. She snorted. Startled, the orange kitten hissed and disappeared with a skittering of claws across the tiled floor.

In her search to be a productive member of the group, Amanda did go out of her way not to get roped into baby-sitting because she just didn't think she had the energy to keep up with the whirling dervish that was Miss Judith Grimes. Leave that to the younger members of the group her that were not pregnant. Her time would come soon enough. She rubbed the slight bump that was her baby. A tiny smile touched her lips. "We'll be okay, little one," she said softly. "We're Dixons. We're survivors."

Amanda wiped the counters down with a damp towel. She would be the first to admit that she was like a fish out of water in the kitchen. Cooking was definitely out but she could clean so dishwashing was to be her lot in life, at least for now. Carol took an extra watch, as did Beth. Rowan appeared to be content with laundry duty and went about it efficiently and without complaint. If she wasn't happy about it, she kept it to herself. Amanda thought her friend had been awfully quiet since the confrontation with Merle about his temper. What the outcome had been, she wasn't privy to it since they didn't continue in her presence but there had been no more violent outbursts from Merle Dixon. However, he was so damn irritable, Amanda was certain he would spontaneously combust if he didn't hit something or someone soon. He took out some of his aggression by killing dozens of walkers through the fence but it just wasn't the same…killing something that was already dead…

As much as she wanted to be mad at Caesar she couldn't. The words Rowan said kept running through her head. "…What Caesar did…it wasn't all that bad...he must really love you." What did Caesar say to her, before all this happened? "I think I'm falling in love you." That's what he said. Maybe he did because the beating he took from the hands of her father didn't deter his attention to her. He was much more reserved but perhaps out of respect for her feelings since he came clean with the knowledge of the paternity of her baby. He gave her space to think but he was never too far away…

She wasn't mad at Rick anymore for rejecting her…well not so much anyway. Dixons had been known to hold a grudge but Amanda and Rick had an easy truce that was working for her, sort of. Occasionally still got a pang in her chest when he did something particularly thoughtful like making sure she had enough to eat. The other day he even apologized for not getting her a new pillow, er pillows, yet.

Amanda smiled sadly as she rinsed the dishcloth and wrung it out. Perhaps they just weren't meant to be. It was probably a smart move on his part not to let their relationship grow. After all, what did she have to offer him? Not a damn thing for not only was she broken, she carried the baby of a psycho and had a violent, crazy redneck for a daddy. She was ugly and moody and selfish and…

"Hey, Mandy," a male voice interrupted.

Rick. He was the only one who called her Mandy. She pushed her hair behind her ears and carefully hung the dishcloth over the faucet to dry, making sure she kept her back to him. She was on the verge of self-pity tears and didn't want Rick to see.

"Did Carol leave a plate for me?" he asked, looking around.

Shit! Carol had set aside a bowl food but Amanda was only half listening, still caught up in her own self to fully hear the other woman's instructions. As Carol was talking, Amanda was thinking that she could wash the damned dishes without directions. She wasn't a total waste of space. Shit! Now,she mentally slapped herself for not paying attention better.

"Rick," she started tentatively and turned around. " Uhm…Carol is on watch and I, uh, I sort of, accidently, uhm…gave your food to the kitten."

"You gave my food to the kitten?"

She nodded. "You know, the scrappy little orange one…" Shut up! You aren't helping!

He put his hands on his hips and cocked his head like he did when he didn't believe what he was hearing.

Amanda quickly filled in the uncomfortable silence. "Carol fixed a bowl for you but I…I thought it was leftovers so I fed the kitten."

He shook his head and sighed tiredly making her feel even more guilty than she already did. "Mandy…"

"I'm really sorry, Rick. Let me make you something else." She offered hurriedly and rushed to the pantry to find a suitable replacement meal. The picked-over shelves didn't yield much except more oatmeal or beans. She was a lousy cook but she could manage a bowl of oatmeal…right? Just add water and…a large hand stopped hers as she reached for the industrial sized sack of oats.

"That's okay, Mandy. I'll find something."

"I don't mind. After all, it is my fault." Her voice trailed off at the end as his presence sucked up all the air in the small room.

"Did the prisoners get fed?" Rick asked. His voice was business-like as if he was dealing with an incompetent employee or a child.

Tears pricked her eyes and Amanda nodded. "Beth fed them," she answered with a shaky voice. Damn, she hated showing any weakness to him.

He nodded but didn't say anything and backed out of the pantry.

"Would you rather have beans, Rick? All I have to do is open a can….can't ruin that can I?" she asked without much confidence to back her claim.

"That's okay. I can wait until dinner," he said as he headed out of the kitchen.

"Rick…"

The door shut loudly behind him.

Amanda leaned back against the edge of the counter and closed her eyes. Would she ever do anything right?

Martinez could feel the elder Dixon's eyes burning holes into his back from his post at the guard tower but Caesar refused to acknowledge his former friend presence. He had no desire to attempt to repair their relationship even if he could. He didn't give a shit what Merle Dixon thought anymore. When he saw the murderous rage in the older man's eyes…he knew they were done. He fully believed that Dixon would have pushed him over the second floor railing if he had not have been stopped. He didn't even remember who stopped him. All he recalled was Amanda's frantic screams begging he dad not to kill him.

Staying at the prison didn't seem a viable option anymore but where would he go? Woodbury? That wasn't much of an option either. He couldn't imagine being under the thumb of the Governor again after having a taste of what it was like to be free. The only reason he was still here was Amanda. He promised he would stand by her and he would as long as she would let him. She hadn't released him. The first few days after being forced to reveal that he knew what the Governor had done to her, Amanda had disappeared into herself again and didn't say much to anyone. She came out of her cell to eat and that was about it. Though it was killing him, he gave her room and eventually she started talking to him again. Not much but at least it was something.

Excluding the Dixon males, these people had become his surrogate family. Carol and Beth were like sisters. Hershel was a fatherly figure who never judged him. The older man was an endless source of helpful advice and intellectual conversation. Oscar was a trusted friend. Glenn and Maggie were okay, though he never interacted much with them as they were too caught up in each other.

Though there was no love lost between him and Rick, Caesar was fond of the ex-lawman's children, especially the little princess. Caesar couldn't keep a smile from forming just thinking about the toddler. She was hell on wheels and kept them on their toes trying to keep her safe but she also kept them laughing. Judith Grimes was a constant reminder that no matter how horrible and hopeless their situation was, joy could still be found and life was still worth living. He hoped that Amanda would realize that when her own child came into this bleak world. They will survive for the sake of the children.

Caesar pulled the collar up when crisp late-autumn gust blasted him as he turned a corner on the north side of the prison. "Damn!" He tried to focus on the task at hand…watching out for any security threat. How ironic, he snorted. A number of the prison residents considered him a security threat. He wasn't….not to anyone here except Merle or maybe his jackass brother but that was only if they started it. He wouldn't be the one to strike first but he sure as hell would do whatever he had to do to defend himself from either redneck asshole.

Finally...an update! Family matters kept me away. To those still reading, thanks for sticking with me. I intend to finish the story to the end.

Happy reading!