"Castiel!" Michael yelled when he heard the front door open. "What time of day do you call this?"
"Good afternoon, Michael." Cas said sheepishly.
"I get home from New York last night to find you two gone. Gabriel I expected this rampant behavior from, but you Castiel? You should be ashamed! At least Gabriel came home last night! Only on his worst days does he come home at noon, Castiel! So do you want to explain yourself?" Michael scolded.
"Um..." Castiel tried to think of a quick excuse. "I was studying with a friend and we were up really late comparing notes for pre-calculus. We lost track of time and I didn't wake up until just now." Cas lied.
"Is that so?" Michael asked.
"Y-yes. It is." Cas stammered.
"May I have this friends number? We can compare our own notes." Michael requested.
"Sure. Let me go grab my contact book." Cas smiled, panicking on the inside.
Cas went into his room and locked his door, immediately pulling out his phone and texting Dean.
Dean!
well that was sooner than expected
Dean, this is serious. Stop joking around.
thats what i do. anyways whats up
My brother came home last night.
well good for him
Maybe so, but not good for me.
and what makes you think i'm going to help you
You know...
not sure i do
I don't have time for this, Dean! He's waiting for my contact book. He is going to call you and ask you what we did last night.
and I'm going to tell him every last erotic detail? he has issues dude
That's not what I meant. As far as last night, your name is Jack. You're in my AP Pre-calc class, and we were comparing notes last night and studying for the final.
and it didn't cross your mind that hes going to notice that you didnt come home with a notebook
Fuck. You know what? I'd typed my notes online, so I used your laptop to view them. How's that?
honestly
pretty sketchy
Wow. What a confidence booster you are.
not my problem
You think so now, but trust me, you do not want a pissed Michael on your ass. I can not stress that hard enough. If he finds out that I went to a party, he's going to be pissed. If he finds out that I went to a party with a bunch of poor people, he'll be pissed. If he finds out that I went to a party and then spent the night in a muggy hotel room doing bad things with you, then he will murder us both. He still thinks I'm sweet an innocent and pure, okay? And we do not associate with people like you, let only get 'involved' with them.
damn you can talk. well type
but fine ill play along with your little game. and me and my friends arent poor
Dean. Everyone is poor in our eyes. Michael only accepts the best
wow cas. thanks for letting me know you care about your brothers standards over me
I don't care about you. Period.
biggest lie youve ever told. i bet youre pacing around the room right now and your face is red
Cas stopped pacing and walked in the bathroom, checking his reflection in the mirror. Dean was right. His face was red.
Dammit. How'd you know that?
in short i know you
No you don't. You know my family.
no. i know you
What do you know about me, then?
i know that when you get nervous you get fidgety which normally means that given the space youll pace back and forth. i also know that when you lie you get flustered and your face turns red
How do you know that?
dude. you lie to me like every five minutes when we talk
Not true!
liar
Oh really? So what do I say that you think is a lie?
well you get all flushed and stuff when you say that you dont care about me or that there is no part of you thats interested in me
...Think what you want, Dean.
and cas
What now?
you say what we do is bad but its not cas. its good. hell its great
Whatever. Just make sure you remember everything I told you, Jack.
i got it,cas
Are you sure?
yes im sure. as long as my ass is on the line ill do great
It's so nice to know that you'll be there in my time of need.
im pretty sure that was sarcasm
It was. Now goodbye.
"Castiel!" Michael shouted up the stairs. "What is taking you so long?"
Cas frantically scribbled Dean's number under the name 'Jack' in his notebook. "I couldn't find it! Apologies!"
Cas quickly ran down the stairs and handed Michael his notebook. Michael glanced at the number and then dialed it on his phone.
"Hello?" Dean answered.
"Is this Jack?" Michael asked, putting the phone on speaker so Cas could hear.
"Yes it is. One moment please. I'm pulling into my mansion in my limousine. I was just out at the old world antique antiques auction." Dean replied.
Cas smiled warily at Michael as he gave the phone a weird look.
"This is who you chose to hang out with?" Michael whispered, putting his hand over the receiver. "I am ashamed at you for choosing such a fool."
After a moment Dean spoke up, slamming his bedroom door. "Okay, sir. I'm in the mansion. May I ask the affair of this call?"
"Was my brother over at your house last night?" Michael asked.
"Indeed he was. We studied all night long. I sure do love a good pre-calculus study session!" Dean laughed. "We had so much fun studying that we lost track of the time. You have my regrets for getting Castiel home at such a late hour?"
"Is he mentally stable for people to be around?" Michael turned to Cas.
"Listen here, you ignorant dickbag. I am perfectly stable and safe to be around people. So how about you go take a nice bar of gold as shove it up your ginormous ass, my good sir?" Dean sneered.
Michael snapped his phone shut, placing it back in his pocket. "That young man has serious social issues and I do not want you studying with him any more. Am I clear?"
"Yes, Michael. I will refrain from associating with him and make wiser choices in who I become acquainted with." Cas answered.
"Good." Michael nodded. "Make sure you're in bed by a reasonable time tonight. Also, I will be going to Las Vegas to look into purchasing a casino there. I'll be leaving the day after tomorrow."
"Michael?"
"Yes, Castiel?" Michael responded.
"Say I was interested in someone. Would you still have to make sure they fit your standards before I was allowed to be with them?" Cas asked hesitantly.
"Yes. Of course. No brother of mine will be caught dead with someone of low societal stature. I'm taking that this is not a hypothetical question?" Michael answered.
"No. It's completely hypothetical. It's only for future reference if I ever find the need for romantic partnership more important." Cas replied.
"It's nice to see you have your priorities in order." Michael smiled.
"Yes." Cas agreed, dismissing himself to go back upstairs.
Cas sat down on his bed and reached for his Chemistry textbook. He read a few pages, but realized that he wasn't actually taking in the information he was seeing. He was terribly distracted and he kept glancing over at his phone. Finally, he gave in and grabbed his phone. He tapped on Dean's name in the contacts, but stared at the screen blankly, debating if he should text him or not.
Finally, Cas resorted to sending Dean a text.
Dean.
Cas immediately regretted it after he sent it.
ok. maybe that was kind of an overreaction the whole dickbag deal
Cas turned off his phone and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Dammit. What did I just do?"
oh cmon cas. you dont just get my hopes up and then stop texting me! the suspense is killing me!
cas
cas
castieeeeellllll
What.
finally
What do you want
what do you want? you texted me first
Oh. I did didn't I?
yup. whats up
cas...
dont leave me hanging here cinderella
Stop calling me that. I'm no Disney princess, Dean.
then tell me what you wanted. you texted me first this time
And I've changed my mind.
about what
Nothing. I have no wishes to continue talking to you.
youre lying again.
So what if I am?
well dont tell me you texted me all for nothing. it mustve been hella important if you actually texted me. i thought it would be weeks before you even talked to me on your own. are you dying
No. I'm perfectly healthy.
either way. since youre not asking for it anymore what did you want to talk to me about
I said nothing.
thats no reason
I'm sure you've done many things without reason.
true as that may be you texted me with a reason and i want to know it even if its not your reason anymore
I don't have to tell you anything.
no you dont. but you should
Why's that?
because you owe me that much thats why
I don't owe you anything. If anyone owes anyone anything, it'd be you.
dont be butthurt
I'm not?
figure of speech cas
Oh.
Dean...
good god cas! what
Can you?
Would you mind?
spit it out. holy fuck... dont stop now
I want to see you.
that wasnt so bad now was it
You know what? Never mind. Forget I said anything.
no backsies cas. look at you. being all grow up and making a booty call
This is not that type of call, you pervert.
? then what kind
I just want to talk.
thats the most boring kind of meeting
Fine. Whatever. Like I said, forget I said anything.
no stop it. i'll do it. when and where
In an hour, a large truck is going to come by delivering some items in large plywood boxes at the house. They're going to be out in the open, not inclosed. There is a large, oak tree on the corner by the sidewalk. Climb the tree and wait on the branch closest to the road WITHOUT FALLING AND BREAKING YOUR NECK. When the truck comes around, jump onto one of the plywood boxes. After that, slide in between two of them, remaining as hidden as you can, especially from the security cameras. There's one on each side of the gate, so be wary of them. Michael will accept the truck onto the premises. The truck will drive around the house to the back. When you're about halfway around the house, you will see a area with a lot of trees. Try to jump off the truck as close to the trees as possible. Walk down the 'corridor' of trees and you will see a maze-like structure made from tall shrubbery. It all leads to the same place. Walk down any of the paths until you reach the center. I'll be waiting there.
did you literally just tell me how to break into your house anytime i want? and they say you dont trust me
You understand all that, right Dean? I'd recommend being in position by ten until 2, just in case they're early. And technically, you only know how to break into the garden on delivery day, but I suppose by altering a few details, you could get anywhere on that truck.
do you watch kidnapping movies all the time or something. that plan is ingenious. i would never have been able to think of something that elaborate. theres always that plan too
What plan? You have one of your own.
come as a delivery man of some sort. ring the bell and they'll let me in. ill go to the door and theyll say that they didnt order pizza or flowers or whatever. then ill just sneak around on the property.
That's risky, Dean. Michael watches until the pizza men leave anyways.
well see you in a bit. ill settle for your criminal strategy
See you then.
Dean parked half a mile away from the mansion and walked to the oak tree like Cas had told him to. He stood with his back to the tree, looking over his shoulder at the security cameras. When the camera had rotated away from the tree, Dean quickly climbed up it and perched there, waiting for the delivery truck. He saw Cas pacing back in forth in his room, the window ajar. Soon, Dean heard the sound of the delivery truck coming. He crawled over to the branch and waited for the truck to start turning the corner. He checked the security camera and saw that it was facing him.
"Turn, turn, turn." He mumbled.
As soon as the security camera was out of his view, Dean jumped as far as he could, landing violently on top of a box. He groaned as he walked in between the boxes, weaseling himself in between two taller ones. He heard the man press the buzzer on the gate and some muffled voices. The golden gates slowly swung open and the truck driver slowly started entering. Dean peeked his head out once they were past the gates and locked his gaze on the rows of trees Cas mentioned. As the truck passed the trees, Dean leapt out and fell to the ground. He rolled a few times to get out of the view of the truck just in case. After a moment, he stood up and followed the trees into the hedges which reminded him eerily of The Shining. He followed the shrubs until he saw a small wooden bench in a grassy clearing. Cas was sitting on the bench reading a book.
"Hey, Cas." Dean laughed.
"Hello, Dean." Cas said, standing up, tucking his book in an inner pocket of his trench coat.
Cas leaned up and messed with Dean's hair.
"Dude. What are you doing?" Dean asked.
"You have leaves in your hair." Cas stated.
"That's kind of expected when you tell me to hide in your tree." Dean retorted. "Why do I have to sneak in to see you? Why can't I just knock on the door?"
"It's complicated." Cas sighed leading Dean to a dirt path lined with large, round stones. "I don't – we don't – have parents. Michael takes care of us most of the time, but if he's going to be gone more than two weeks, he'll send Lucifer to check up on us."
"What happened to your parents?" Dean asked. "If you don't mind."
"My mom just left me on my dad's doorstep one day and said my name was 'Castiel'. Michael was the only one who knew his mother. Lucifer also knew her, but not as well. That's what happened to my dad. He was in love with a woman. Her name was Becky. Becky Rosen. She was always kind of weird, but she was really nice at heart. Anyways, when Michael was 15 and Lucifer was 12, she died. It was tragic, really. She was a bank teller and there was a robbery. She died protecting a pregnant woman. We later found out that she was pregnant again herself. This was all before I came along of course. Gabriel was one and a half when it happened. Our dad was going through a rough time. He drank a lot and would stay out a lot. After Becky died, Dad slept around a lot. I guess that's where I came from. Four years after I was born, he drank himself to death. The maid found him." Cas answered.
"That's...terrible, Cas. I'm sorry." Dean replied as Cas stopped, approaching a small lake.
"We've adjusted." Cas smiled faintly, removing his shoes and socks and rolling up his pant legs, sitting on the edge of the water, swinging his feet around. "That's when Michael got that stick lodged all the way up his ass. He got guardianship over us and we were like his kids. Good thing he never had any of his own. I'd hate for anyone else to go through that."
"Dude. You're sitting in a lake that you have in your backyard of your mansion." Dean laughed. "How can you be complaining here?"
"Dean. If there's one thing I've learned from this life, it's that I would rather have a loving, happy family rather than all the riches in the world. So what if we went from number 19 to number 17 on the worlds richest families? I just want some normalcy for once." Cas proclaimed.
"Well, if you ask me, I think that makes you special. Whoever your mother was, she must've been awesome to give birth to such a freak like you." Dean chuckled.
"Do you have a job?" Cas asked.
"Random much?" Dean smirked.
"Well do you?" Cas repeated.
"Yeah. How do you think the bills get paid around here?" Dean replied.
"You support your brother and father?" Cas scoffed.
"Been doing it since I was 13. My dad supports himself well enough though. And by that, I mean he makes enough to live at a bar and live off crappy hotdogs and nachos." Dean took off his shoes and rolled up his jeans, sitting next to Cas.
"Your mom?" Cas asked.
"Died in an electrical fire on Sammy's 6 month birthday and when I was four." Dean stated.
"You know, if you ever need a better paying job, you can work for us." Cas offered.
"Would I have to wear a black and white miniskirt and corset like in the movies?" Dean smiled. "Carry around a little feather duster?"
"Not at all." Cas laughed. "Unless of course you wanted to. Otherwise, you just have to look nice. Actually, it's more complicated than that. With most employees, they start at cleaning duty or yardwork. The more proficient and hardworking they are, the more we give them to do. Eventually, the employees work their way up to chauffers, butlers, person assistants, chefs, accountants, or other things. I could always put a good word in for you of course. Then, you'd have 24 hour rights of passage via your I.D card."
"Damn. You guys are intense here." Dean remarked.
"It's been much more 'intense' since Michael took control." Cas replied.
"Is he the one that brought your family to fame and fortune?" Dean asked.
"Not really. Our family has been rich and well known for hundreds of years actually. Look in the right history books in school, and you'll see little mentions of 'Novak' here and there. Michael is very smart though. He just increased our profit in the modern day and age through the use of stock shares, investments, online funds, mutual funds, charities, media, real estate, and other means." Cas answered.
"I think I understood part of that." Dean retorted.
"Michael may be a good businessman and all." Cas continued. "But honestly I don't think he's cut out for the whole 'raising kids' thing. He's just too controlling about things. He sets our responsibilities for us, and sets our goals for us, tells us what to do, only lets us be around certain people based on th-"
"Did you call me over here so you could have someone to complain about your brother to?" Dean smiled.
"Maybe..."
"Are you telling me that you had me wait in a tree, jump on to a moving vehicle, squeeze in between boxes, break into a billionaire's mansion, jump off the vehicle, roll in the dirt, and go through a maze just so you could vent about Michael?" Dean scoffed. "If someone did that for me every time Sammy got on my nerves, they'd have to really love me."
"Well, this is different!" Cas protested. "This is Michael. That's just Sam."
"Because your problems are so much more severe and important than everyone else's." Dean rolled his eyes.
"Well they are." Cas argued.
"Okay then, your highness. Tell me your problems." Dean smiled.
"Just so you know what you're getting yourself into, you better be prepared to come whenever I call, too. Michael aggravates me often you know." Cas warned.
"Always happy to jump out of a moving vehicle and risk my life so that you have someone to talk to about your problems." Dean smirked. "So what'd the big bad do to you today?"
Cas sighed, leaning his head on Dean's shoulder. "So, I had mentioned the topic of dating to Michael-"
"Dating?" Dean asked smiling, turning to look at Cas. "Got anyone in particular in mind?"
"No." Cas answered flatly. "Like I told Michael, my studies are a more pressing need than a romantic relationship."
"And is that why you had to sneak me in? So Michael doesn't know your boyfriend's a poor person?" Dean teased.
"You're not my boyfriend." Cas stated.
"Sure I am." Dean smiled.
"No. You're not." Cas repeated.
"What else do you call the guy that you make out with every time you see him and sometimes have sex with?" Dean laughed.
Cas remained silent.
"That's what I thought." Dean smirked. "Now where were we, boyfriend?"
"I'm not your boyfriend." Cas whined. "We're not dating."
"Not dating?" Dean laughed. "If you ask me, this is our fourth date."
"Well no one's asking you. And if someone asked me, nothing is going on between us." Cas said stubbornly.
"Is that so?" Dean asked.
"Yes." Cas answered curtly.
"Well. I'm sorry, Cas." Dean sighed. "I hate to have to do this to you."
"Do what, Dean?" Cas asked panicky. "Dean, you're scaring me. You're not going to stab me are you? Please don't stab me."
Dean laughed as he silenced Cas's incessant rambling with a kiss. Cas relaxed beneath his touch and leaned in closer to Dean.
"Castiel!" Michael called.
Dean tried to say something, but Cas kept kissing him. Dean eventually resorted to slapping him.
"What was that for?" Cas rubbed his face.
"One. Payback. Two. Trouble." Dean answered.
"Castiel!" Michael repeated.
"He knows I like to come out here." Cas whispered.
"How deep is this lake?" Dean asked, pulling his phone out of his pocket.
"Pretty...Dean what ar-" Cas couldn't finish his question because Dean had already tossed his phone in Cas's lap and dove into the lake.
Dean popped his head up after a second.
"What the hell are you doing, Dean?" Cas scoffed.
"Hiding. Would you rather him find the poor boy making out with his innocent baby brother?" Dean smirked.
"Would you stop referring to yourself as the 'poor boy', Dean?" Cas snapped. "I do not think of you that way."
"Michael does." Dean replied. "And right now I'm on his turf."
"There you are Castiel." Michael said as he heard Cas talking.
"That's my cue." Dean whispered, taking a large breath and quietly sinking under, hovering at the bottom of the pond.
He watched as Michael and Cas conversed. Cas kept shifting his gaze away from Michael and down at the lake. Eventually, Dean gave him a thumbs up and Cas coudln't help but smile a little.
"Castiel, why do you keep looking at the lake?" Michael asked. "Is there something down there?"
"No." Cas answered a little too quickly.
"What were you smiling at then?" Michael continued.
"The fish. They're just so fun and cute and fascinating." Cas smiled back down at the water, but got worried when Dean dragged his hand across his throat in the 'cut it out' fashion. "You know. When you really get to the science of things, it's fascinating. The way their circulatory systems work in coordination with their skeletal systems is just-"
"I'm going to leave you alone with your fish now then." Michael interrupted him. "Make sure you're cleaned up by 6 o'clock for supper."
"Will do." Cas smiled worriedly. "Just me and my fish."
Michael nodded and turned his back, beginning to walk off. Cas fell to the ground and stuck a thumbs up under the water. Dean quickly swam up, gasping for air. Cas started laughing quietly.
"What's so funny?" Dean asked. "And could you have taken any longer? I thought I was going to die down there waiting for you two!"
Cas pulled a lily pad off Dean's head. "Let's get you out of there."
Dean hoisted himself out of the lake and shivered. "It's the middle of December and I just dove into a freezing pond to save your ass. You should heat that thing."
"Here. You're going to freeze." Cas said, pulling off Dean's shirts.
"Yeah. Thanks, genius." Dean retorted as Cas pulled off his jacket and trenchcoat.
"Put these on." Cas ordered.
Normally, Dean would've protested, but he was too cold to care. He quickly wrapped the jacket and trenchcoat around him. "So am I just going to sit here all night?"
"Of course not. Don't be stupid." Cas replied.
"And that was totally nothing. No sparks at all. Nope. Not at all." Dean smirked.
"What?" Cas asked.
"Our previous conversation...you said that there was absolutely nothing between us." Dean smiled.
"Fine. You win this round, but I'm still not your boyfriend." Cas said indignantly.
"So how do you plan to sneak me out of here?" Dean asked.
"I don't." Cas smiled.
"What do you mean you don't?" Dean scoffed. "I'm cold and wet and need new clothes."
"Do you know where you are? Do you know how many clothes I have?" Cas laughed.
"How many do you have that aren't suits or formal wear, huh?" Dean smirked.
Cas smiled sheepishly.
"That's what I thought." Dean mused.
"Either way. We need to get you inside and into dry clothes." Cas said.
"Well, criminal mastermind, how do you plan on getting that to work?" Dean asked.
"Get an accomplice." Cas answered, pulling out his phone and waving it in front of Dean's face.
Cas dialed Gabriel's number and put the phone on speaker. "Cassie?"
"Hello, Gabriel." Cas sighed.
"Why are you calling me? Can't you just knock on my door?" Gabriel asked. "Or is this a code red?"
"Affirmative." Cas replied.
"Can I get a visual on you?" Gabriel asked.
"Best point of view would be from window 3.2L." Cas answered.
"What the hell are you guys saying?" Dean laughed confused.
"We've done this a lot for each other. We memorized every window and room and gave them names." Cas explained quickly.
"I have visual." Gabriel smirked.
Cas looked towards the window and waved to establish contact.
"Is that Dean Winchester?" Gabriel scoffed. "Is it true what everyone says? Is he honestly that good at-"
Gabriel rattled off a long list of NC-17 terms and then continued. "If so, I want to know every detail."
"At least now I know the areas where I need to improve." Dean said.
"Was he on speaker phone, Cas?" Gabriel asked.
"I sure was." Dean replied.
"Fuck..." Gabriel muttered.
"Yeah. Let's pretend the last two minutes of our lives didn't happen and continue." Dean laughed awkwardly.
"What's your point of destination?" Gabriel asked.
"Room .1" Cas replied.
"That'll be tricky. Who do you think will be trustworthy on this mission?" Gabriel continued. "Can we trust The Serpent?"
"I don't know. The Serpent is fair, but he is also very close with The Eagle." Cas sighed. "The Dolphin and The Elephant will go all the way with this."
"I agree. I'll add them to this op." Gabriel said.
Dean could see Gabriel hitting a series of buttons on his phone.
"Hello?" Charlie and Kevin answered at the same time.
"This is The Hyena here. We have a code red with The Dove. We need to get The Dove to Room .1 with a Class One casualty." Gabriel stated.
"Class Two, Hyena." Cas corrected.
"Class Two." Gabriel repeated. "I can manage Stairwell 6.1. Which of you will take Stairwell 6.2?"
"I'll take it." Charlie answered.
"I'll keep visual on The Eagle." Kevin added. "Does anyone have visual now?"
"I do. He's at window 5.3B." Cas replied.
"Heading to corridor 5AH now." Kevin stated.
"Everyone get into position." Gabriel ordered.
"What's going on?" Dean asked. "This is stupid."
"When you live with Michael it isn't. This is how we sneak people into the house. It's a complex process, Dean." Cas said sternly, hastily walking down the rest of the dirt path until it ended where it ran into another, slightly larger lake. Cas lead Dean to an area surrounded with tile. Upon closer inspection, Dean could tell it was an outdoor convertible wave pool.
"We're almost in position." Cas proclaimed.
"I've reached Corridor 5AH." Kevin announced.
"We all good?" Gabriel asked.
"Affirmative." They all answered.
"Then it's a go." Gabriel smirked.
Cas grabbed Dean's hand and quickly pulled him inside the backdoor of the house. He ran up the stairs dragging Dean sloshing around behind him.
"We're approaching stairwell 2.1." Cas said quietly.
"Clear." Kevin replied.
The two ran up to the next stairwell. "We've reached Stairwell 3.1."
"Run." Kevin ordered. "He's heading towards stairwell 3.1 hastily."
Cas grabbed Dean and pulled him along down the long hallway.
"He's almost to the stairwell, guys." Kevin stressed. "Run."
Cas heard Michael calling his name. "Castiel! Is that you? Castiel!"
"Elephant, can you meet the casualty at Stairwell 4.2 and escort him to .1?" Cas requested. "The Eagle may be causing a delay for me."
"Initiating casualty transfer." Charlie stated as Cas pushed Dean up the stairs.
Charlie grabbed Dean at the stairs and ran him to the top floor. "This is the floor where Gabriel, Lucifer, and Castiel's rooms are. This is Castiel's."
Charlie pushed Dean into Cas's room and shut the door behind him.
"Whoa..." Dean breathed as he saw how large Cas's room was. His bedroom alone was the size of Dean's entire house.
Dean saw a pair of double doors and opened them. They led outside to a view of the front yard and gate entryway. There was smooth vines hanging from a nearby tree that were draped over the balcony. To any normal person, it would look like just some vines and a tree, but Dean immediately recognized it as a way for people to sneak in, specifically at night.
"Dean?" Cas called, walking into his room.
Dean poked his head back in the room. "Innocent my ass."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Cas asked.
"This tree is obviously not just for decoration." Dean snorted. "The way the branches are smoothed out, the vines that travel up the tree and to your balcony, those little things that only a pro manslut would notice. Obviously you got more game that I thought you did."
"Are you assuming that I just go around sneaking strangers into my room and have casual sex with them?" Cas scoffed.
"You do realize that the first scenario we met each other under was having casual sex with a stranger right?" Dean laughed.
"Yes. I am aware." Cas scowled. "But that doesn't count. We're not strangers anymore."
"Whatever helps you sleep at night." Dean smiled. "Where's your dresser? I'm cold and soaked."
"Dresser?" Cas chuckled. "We don't' have dressers."
"Do you just wear whatever's on the floor then?" Dean smirked. "I mean, I do that all the time."
"That's unsanitary, Dean." Cas stated, picking up a remote. "We have closets."
Cas pointed the remote and his wall, and it opened up, revealing a large room full of clothes, shoes, accessories, and more. "This is pretty self explanatory. Take what you'd like."
Dean laughed as he saw the pity of a clothing selection Cas had besides from suits. Dean grabbed a pair of sweat pants and blue t-shirt. Cas tossed him a pair of boxers.
"Don't worry." Cas smiled. "They're clean."
"Better be." Dean muttered. "I'm going to take a shower. Feel free to join me."
"No. No. No. How sweet of you to offer though." Cas smirked.
"Whatever. As a good friend of mine once said, I'm beginning to doubt my reputation as a loser." Dean mocked.
"Because that makes sense. I must completely be a loser because I won't have shower sex with you." Cas rolled his eyes.
"Like I said, one track mind. Who said anything about sex?" Dean smiled.
"You don't have to. I know how your evilly seductive mind works." Cas replied.
"Humor me. How does it work?" Dean asked, peeling the wet shirt off himself.
"For example. You're taking your shirt off right now in an attempt to seduce me by showing your chest." Cas folded his arms.
"Actually, I'm just taking my shirt off because it's freezing cold and I'm getting ready for my shower." Dean responded. "Sorry."
"Even if my point weren't 100% incorrect, because we all know that's one of your motives, that it would still not work. I am completely unfazed by-" Cas started confidently.
"By the tall, athletic, rugged, handsome, dripping wet, not to mention shirtless man right in front of you?" Dean teased.
"Completely..." Cas answered, obviously not all there.
Dean undid his belt and added it to the pile of sopping wet clothes on Cas's bedroom floor.
"I know what you're doing, Dean Winchester." Cas scowled.
"Other than getting ready for my shower?" Dean chuckled.
"I know what you are." Cas glared at him.
"A funny, smart, cunning, well-rounded guy?" Dean smirked.
"No. You are manipulative, controlling, brainwashing, cruel" Cas started, Dean slowly inching closer to Cas. "agile, fast, and hot. Really fucking hot."
Cas grabbed onto him and latched his lips onto Dean's, causing Dean to stumble backwards and crash into the wall. Cas pushed him into the bathroom and grabbed at the shower faucet, turning it on. The shower curtain was closed, so water started getting on the floor. Cas continued pushing Dean back, but Dean slipped on the water and fell into the shower, hitting his head on the back wall.
He groaned as he recovered from the impact. Cas got down on the bathroom tile in front of Dean and started pulling off his jeans.
"Hold the fuck up, Cas." Dean laughed.
Cas stopped fussing with Dean's jeans and looked up at him confused. "What is it?"
"Let's take a moment to evaluate this situation." Dean smiled.
"We are about to have sex." Cas stated.
"No we aren't, Cas." Dean pushed Cas off him, forcing him to sit back on his feet. "This is the wrong time and definitely the wrong place."
"No such thing." Cas smirked.
"You say that now, but what about five minutes later when Michael knocks down the door because he thinks you're having a seizure and finds you losing your non existent virginity in a bathtub with a mechanic?" Dean retorted.
"I'm sure he'd be very surprised, but that's five minutes from now. That's not now." Cas replied.
"You are doing way too much thinking with your downstairs brain right now." Dean chuckled.
"You're doing too much with your upstairs brain." Cas rested his hands on Dean's ankles.
"Either way, I am sitting in a freezing shower in jeans, I'm pretty sure my head's bleeding, and Cas, what are you doing?" Dean asked. "Cas? Are you even hearing a word I'm saying?"
"Nope." Cas smiled, pulling his shirt off over his head. "And I probably wouldn't care if I was."
"How in the hell did that even work?" Dean scoffed, his legs hanging out of the tub. "Do I have a concussion?"
"I doubt." Cas answered, laying back down across Dean's chest. "I still don't care thought."
"And you called me the controlling, manipulative, cruel, brainwashing one." Dean snorted. "I think there's another side to the story here."
"I would apologize, but that's not in my personality." Cas shrugged.
"Can I actually take my shower now? That's kind of all I wanted was my shower." Dean laughed.
"I find that surprising coming from you." Cas retorted.
"Well I found all that surprising coming from you. I want to shower and you want crazy bathtub sex. Sounds about right." Dean nodded.
"Shut up." Cas smiled, rolling over on Dean, resting his head on Dean's shoulder as Dean wrapped his legs around his waist.
"You do realize I'm serious about the shower thing, right? I need to shower. I found a freaking fish in my shoe." Dean smirked.
"Poor fish. It didn't deserve that." Cas pouted.
Dean flicked some water at Cas's face. "And I'm sure you didn't deserve that either."
"I did not." Cas stated.
"I think you did." Dean smiled.
"Maybe a little." Cas kissed the side of Dean's neck.
"At least you're out of denial." Dean chuckled.
"Not all the way. Don't worry." Cas assured him. "After all this, I'm still not your boyfriend."
"Oh, goodie." Dean mumbled sarcastically. "What does that makes us then? Fuck buddies? I have like 30 of those."
Cas narrowed his eyes and his playful expression fell.
"I mean I wouldn't be allowed to have a fuck buddy if I had a boyfriend, but for shame, I don't have one. Oh well, at least I have 29 other people." Dean teased.
Cas scowled at the remark.
"I thinks someone's jealous." Dean sang. "Jealous of the 29 other people I have casual sex with."
"Fine!" Cas exclaimed. "Fine, I'll do it!"
"No backsies." Dean declared.
"Fine whatever." Cas sighed.
"Say it for the record." Dean smiled smugly.
"I, Castiel Novak, agree to be your boyfriend. No backsies." Cas said raising his right hand.
"Kiss to make it official." Dean smirked.
Cas leaned in and kissed Dean, pulling back with a close resemblance of Sammy's bitchface on. "There were no fuck buddies to being with, were there?"
"Nope." Dean grinned.
"Then I call ba-" Dean stopped him.
"No backsies, Cas." Dean smiled.
"You little piece of manipulating shit!" Cas yelled.
"What kind of way is that to treat your boyfriend?" Dean asked, a large smile spreading across his face.
It was really the first time Cas had actually noticed his smile. The way Dean smiled brought all his other features to life. It made his eyes light up and his freckles dance across his face. It made his eyes crinkle at the edges and Cas couldn't take it anymore. He pressed his face against Dean's, which Dean took by surprise, but he quickly moved his hands up to Cas's hair.
It wasn't until a few rough kisses later that they realized Kevin was standing there, his jaw practically on the floor.
"This is not what it looks like." "This is totally what it looks like." Dean and Cas said at the same time.
"Uh-huh..." Kevin muttered. "I take it this is a bad time?"
"Nah." Dean shrugged. "What you need?"
"You know what? It can wait. Until you both aren't fucking each other in a bathtub." Kevin said awkwardly backing out of the room.
"Hey! Hey, Kevin!" Dean called. "Guess what?"
"Do I want to know?" Kevin asked.
"Cas is my boyfriend!" Dean chimed.
"I gathered. I'm leaving now." Kevin stammered, running out of the room and entering Gabriel's next door.
"As completely unsuspected and hot you kissing me was, I think we should go track down Kevin." Dean sighed.
Cas pouted as he climbed off Dean and out of the tub, reaching over and turning off the faucet.
"Have fun with the water bill this month." Dean smiled.
"Always do." Cas smirked, helping Dean up from the tub. Dean stepped into the boxers and sweat pants, and Cas just put his old trousers on, not bothering to fasten them back up. After checking and making sure that the coast was clear, Cas and Dean walked into Gabriel's room where Charlie, Kevin, and Gabriel were laughing.
"Kevin was telling the truth!" Charlie wheezed, looking at Cas and Dean. "Nice sex hair, you two. And the shower. Nice touch."
"You breath a word of this to anyone and I will personally cut your feet off. That goes for all of you." Dean threatened.
"First, just burn my eyes out." Kevin mumbled, lying traumatized staring up at the ceiling. "I saw parts of you both that I never wanted to see."
"What'd you want anyways?" Dean asked.
"We just wanted to tell you that we saw Michael's laptop out on the table and he apparently has wired cameras in your room and bathroom, so he just saw all of that." Gabriel said sheepishly.
"He what?!" Dean and Cas scoffed at the same time.
"Just kidding." Gabriel smiled.
"Fuck you." Dean retorted.
"What is it really?" Cas asked.
"Michael has had an important change in plans and is leaving tonight after dinner instead of tomorrow." Kevin answered.
Dean looked over at Cas and smiled. "All right."
Cas smiled back at Dean and then kissed him.
"Okay!" Charlie slammed her hands against her legs. "No one can look me in the eye and tell me that they have seen a cuter couple than those two!"
"You know what we should tonight?" Dean chimed.
They all turned their attention to him.
"We should get all the maid and dude maids and employees and chefs and sit down and watch movies. We can make s'mores and eat popcorn and ice cream and enjoy ourselves for a night!" Dean exclaimed.
"That's actually a great idea." Cas mused. "It gives everyone some nice downtime."
"Oh great." Charlie snorted. "You guys are always going to agree on everything now."
"No." They both said at the same time.
"See. You even both agreed to disagree!" Charlie laughed.
"We disagree over everything, dude." Dean replied. "It's not like we talk that much anyways." Dean smirked.
Gabriel moved his eyebrows up and down at them.
"I'm sure Gabriel's right there." Kevin retorted.
"I'm sure I am, too." Gabriel smirked.
After dinner, all of the remaining staff and the friends gathered around with Dean.
"If we're going to have an amazing night off, we're going to need to make sure it's amazing!" Dean yelled, standing on a sofa. "Gabriel!"
Gabriel tossed Dean the keys to the limo.
"Dean..." Cas scolded. "Don't do something you're going to regret once the cops find you."
"Ah, yes. Words of wisdom from the fake virgin." Dean smiled.
Cas hit Dean on the arm in the way out. "That's different."
"Everything's different with you." Dean snorted.
"That's because I'm-"
"Important, yes I know." Dean laughed.
"I'll have you know that everyone in my family has their own Wikipedia page. Do you have your own Wikipedia page?" Cas asked.
"I have my good looks. Can you say that about yourself?" Dean taunted.
"Yes I can." Cas stuck his tongue out.
Dean took Cas's hand and escorted him to the limo like a gentleman and opened the door for him. Immediately after, Dean violently jumped into the driver's seat, and flipped all the backseat control switches.
"Dean." Cas fretted. "Are you sure you know what you're doing?"
"Nope." Dean laughed.
"We're going to die. It's official. Say goodbye, everyone." Cas smiled.
"I know how to drive, Cas. I've been driving for years!" Dean assured him, kissing him on the forehead.
Cas fixed his hair where Dean had messed it up and scowled as the uproar in the back got louder. "What the hell is so damn noisy?"
Dean and Cas peered back there and saw that there were rainbow lights flashing, the windows were down, and Dean had music blaring throughout the whole vehicle. He had 'Highway to Hell' on specifically as they drove down the literal highway to the superstore.
"Cas and I will take desserts. Gabriel, you and Charlie can take movies. Kevin, you and that guy can get popcorn and popcorn seasoning. You two can get chips and stuff. And you three can get candy." Dean doled out orders. "Meet back here in 15."
"When you say, desserts, what do you mean?" Cas asked.
"What kind of sugar snack do you like? Ice cream? Pie? Cake?" Dean asked.
"I kind of like cake." Cas shrugged.
"You either like it or you don't, Cas." Dean chuckled.
"Fine. I like it." Cas said.
Dean walked up to the bakery in the back. "What kind do you like?"
"I like the red kind with the really tasty frosting." Cas answered.
Dean winked at the blonde behind the cake counter. "We'll take your largest red velvet cake with white buttercream frosting."
"Would you like a birthday message written on it?" The lady asked.
"Yeah, I would." Dean smiled. "This is my friend, Cas. That's short for Castravantov Tarvqo. He's Russian. It's his uncle Fuq's birthday tomorrow. So we're getting him the cake."
"Do you want me to write 'Happy Birthday' for him, or do you want just his name?" The blonde asked.
"I'll just get his name." Dean nodded.
"How is it spelt?" She asked.
"Let's see...if I remember correctly, it's English spelling is F-U-Q D-A P-O-L-I-S-H." Dean spelled.
She wrote it down and sighed, ringing up their total.
"Now to get some pie." Dean chimed, setting the cake in the cart.
"I do not understand." Cas mused. "What did the Polish ever do to you?"
"Polish?" Dean asked.
"The cake. You wrote 'Fuck the Polish' on it." Cas replied.
"I had to pretend it was with a Russian accent or something. I had to spell it weird, okay." Dean defended.
"You just better pray that no one that works for us is Polish." Cas muttered. "What was that supposed to be anyways?"
"Police." Dean answered.
"Wise choice, Dean." Cas said sarcastically. "Because when you don't have a license yet and you're driving around town in a limo completely tricked out and filled with a party in the back, you really want a cake that says 'Fuck the Police' sitting in the back seat."
"I love when you're a smart ass." Dean growled, grabbing Cas's waist and pulling him into a chaste kiss.
"You know what I love?" Cas smirked.
"Other than my fabulous ass?" Dean laughed.
"Other than your fabulous ass?" Cas smiled.
"What?" Dean asked.
Cas opened a nearby freezer and threw two packages of bacon in the cart, holding one up towards Dean. "When we make like bacon and strip."
"I'm not sure if I found that hot or if it's just the hunger talking." Dean teased.
"Probably both." Cas replied. "Name one time when you don't find me hot."
"When you're too cool for school." Dean pulled off his imaginary sunglasses.
"Clever." Cas rolled his eyes.
After a very half-assed attempt at safe driving back to the mansion, they all filed out of the limo and grabbed the groceries.
"Hey! What's wrong with the Polish?!" Someone called.
"Typo!" Dean replied.
"Better be!" The man yelled back.
"Woo! Go Polish!" Dean chanted.
"Damn straight!" The man laughed.
After they prepared all the food, they went into the home theatre, because what billionaire doesn't have one, and set the food up in there. Gabriel loaded the first movie into the DVD player at got it set up. It was 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off'.
Everyone got heaping literal bowls of food and sat down in their seats, Dean and Cas sitting a few rows behind everyone else. Halfway through the movie, Cas grabbed Dean's face softly and turned his head to face him. Still holding onto his chin, Cas leaned across the bowl of sweets they were sharing and began kissing him. It was slow and soft, but meaningful.
"You know, Dean." Cas smiled. "Maybe I don't completely hate you. You're okay."
"You're okay too, Cas." Dean replied, ruffling Cas's hair.
Cas swatted Dean's hand away. "Don't touch me."
A/N: Yeah. I completely planned to write over 24 pages of chapter today. When I type the docs, I would denote text messages with the little less than and equal than signs, but apparently, those won't show up in FFN properly, even if I type them from the doc editor. Hopefully by making them italicized, it'll make things easier to understand there.