Hiya! Another chapter and more angsting and as promised this time we´ll get a look at what Yazoo hinks of the events ^^

Special thanks to PfenixB for the awesome betaing!!!

Enjoy!


7

Slowly, Yazoo blinked his eyes open, drowsily taking in his surroundings.

Something was wrong…

His whole body was hurting like hell and the familiar weight of an arm draped around his waist was missing…

Taking in the brown cushions under his face, the scratched wooden table and the old blotched carpet he definitely knew that he wasn´t home.

But where…

As he tried to get up from his position lying on his stomach, an angry jolt of pain pierced through his whole body. It brought back the memory with sickening clarity.

Reno… The 'argument'… escape… Cid…

He squeezed his eyes shut again, trying to will the images away.

Just why… had everything become just so fucked up?!

It had started so very beautiful with them!

He remembered the first time they´d met and when everything had been alright so vividly as if it was just yesterday…

To say that it was love on first sight may have overdone it a bit, but the moment Loz had brought him home, Reno had taken over the kitchen with his sheer presence and charisma. He and his buddy Rude were part of the gang Loz was also a member of, and apparently they had wanted to discuss something or other, Yazoo hadn´t known. He had been 14 at that time, almost 15, and Reno had just fascinated him. He was about two years older, had these intriguing red tattoos under his eyes and was part of Loz´ gang. Plus that he was handsome of course, straightforward, funny and very charming. And apparently Yazoo had caught his eye, because from that first day on, Reno became a regular guest, and he always made sure to see Yazoo too.

Loz watched their developing relationship with skepticism at first, for he was very protective of Yazoo. Despite the fact that Yazoo had a whole bunch of secret admirers he exploited for presents and little favours in all conscience, Loz believed that his beautiful brother would be dead meat if he didn´t take care of him and scare every potential partner away.

With Reno it was different. He was a friend Loz trusted. And Reno did not even try to conceal his interest for Yazoo, making him compliments, bringing little presents such as flowers he put into Yazoo´s hair, taking him out for strolls, searching for body contact; the list was endless. And for Yazoo it was different too, because this somehow was more than just fooling around or taking advantage of a crush.

Eventually innuendos became more concrete, and after they had shared their first kiss it was official that they belonged together. Loz had a long talk with Reno before eventually, albeit grudgingly, giving his amen. Once he´d gotten used to the idea he was fine with it though, even calling Reno his brother-in-law and everything had been so very perfect.

Nothing had mattered but their being together, which also led to Yazoo quitting school because he thought it to be meaningless (much to the dismay of his teachers, who thought that he was a good student when he wanted to be and had a very good chance of going to college). It really had been the best time of his life so far and the best thing was that he and Reno never argued. Everything just seemed to play out naturally.

Well, once in a while Yazoo mentioned that he wished Reno would stop smoking because it was bad for his health, but the redhead always laughed, kissed him and promised he´d try. At least it had become remarkably less over the years…

The first time Reno hit him was approximately three months after they had officially come together. They went out to a bar, Reno saying that he felt a little moody and wanted to party. He drunk quite a bit and dragged Yazoo on the dance floor, whispering into his ear how beautiful he was and how he loved showing him off.

Yazoo smirked at that and pressed his body harder against Reno´s and the evening was fun. Just until the point when someone from the gang had the bright idea to ask Yazoo to dance with him too.

It was utterly harmless and Reno had been at the bar to get more drinks so Yazoo thought it was okay. Johnny was a good friend of theirs, after all. Apparently Reno had a different opinion though, because when he came back to the table, seeing his boyfriend being touched by someone else, he marched straight on the dance floor, grabbed Yazoo´s wrist and dragged him out of the club to confront him about his 'slutty' behaviour.

Although Yazoo told him that he was hurting his wrist Reno didn´t loosen his grip and pushed him against a wall outside, demanding to know what he was doing. Confused and quite a bit scared Yazoo had told him that he´d only been dancing with Johnny and Reno had snorted at that, telling him that he didn´t believe that because everyone knew that Johnny had the biggest crush on Yazoo since ever and then he had said some insulting things about Yazoo being a bitch – Reno 'proved' with the 'fact' that before they had come together Yazoo had been fucking around like a rabbit and that he was obviously still doing so even though he was in an exclusive relationship with Reno now. This in turn made the silver haired teen angry -because he had ditched his admirers about 4 months ago- and he said that maybe Reno was right, maybe Johnny was much better suited for him.

It was then that Reno´s hand slipped and he slapped Yazoo square in the face. The boy was too shocked to say something, only staring at Reno with big eyes, who didn´t look any less bewildered. The next moment the redhead hugged him though, telling the silver haired youth how sorry he was and that he hadn´t meant it and Yazoo assuring that he hadn´t been serious either and they agreed to just forget it.

The next time it happened was because of a similar case, Reno accusing him of having flirted with the barman and this time it wasn´t just a slap but a punch to the stomach and several hits on the shoulder.

They made up the next day, Reno promising to never do it again and even crying when he saw the bruises.

It went like this for the next few years.

Whenever he drank too much, Reno lost control to the point where he sometimes didn´t even remember the next day what he´d done. But he always apologized, assuring Yazoo how much he loved him, how sorry he was, that he would stop drinking now and that he only had gotten emotional (read: violent) because he was afraid Yazoo would leave him in favour of someone else. Yazoo always said that he wouldn´t even think about the possibility and for a few weeks it was just bliss, because Reno was so very attentive and gentle with him. And no one ever asked about the bruises, not even Loz.

Maybe they didn´t see, didn´t want to see, or just didn´t care. Yazoo always had an excuse too.

Besides, their arguments were always soon forgotten, because all good things happened shortly after one of Reno´s fits. They had their first sex, they decided to live together and Reno asked if Yazoo wanted to marry him…

And of course Yazoo wanted to, he thought. Although he felt a little different this time.

Maybe it was… because of Cid Highwind.

Admittedly Yazoo thought the man was quite ill-mannered and potty-mouthed, but his comment about Yazoo letting himself been beaten into a 'bloody pulp´ was something akin to a mental punch in the guts.

Maybe it was because no one ever had stated the fact quite so bluntly and right into his face, since everyone else didn´t seem to care or mind, but it did something to him, something he didn´t know if he liked.

It made him think and see things in a somewhat different light. Of course Yazoo told himself that Cid didn´t know anything and that it wasn´t his business at all, but the small nagging voice in the back of his mind became harder and harder to ignore.

The next time, when Reno in another fit of anguish kicked his hip and leg so hard that he could barely walk and needed two hours to reach the shop, he inwardly was almost afraid that Cid would say something again, that he would rub it right into his face, because Yazoo somehow felt so pathetic…

But the mechanic didn´t say anything at all. And the fact that it didn´t make Yazoo feel relieved or satisfied kept him thinking the whole day. Of course he was glad that he didn´t have to explain himself to a total stranger who didn´t know anything anyway, but the usual peace of mind he had when he thought about coming home and making up with Reno didn´t come this time.

Yazoo also caught himself thinking what may happen if maybe… he just didn´t go home. The thought then frightened him to no end and he instantly shoved it away.

Because it was just ridiculous. He would never leave Reno, he loved him and he knew that Reno loved him equally, if not more. It was just hard times and Reno needed him now especially. They had overcome any other obstacle together before and they would do so in the future!

But it had been easier to find comfort in these thoughts when he´d stayed at home all day, being only with Reno and not having the piercing, scrutinizing eyes of his employer boring in his back. He really had craved for his isolation and safe home when he had started working for Cid. There had always been the fear of being raped or taken advantage of, because Reno had warned him that people would do that to a beautiful person like him sooner or later and that he had to be cautious. Over time that had changed, though. He found that he had fun working in the shop and talking to other people beside Reno and occasionally Loz or Rude when they came for a visit.

Things became… broader.

So when he went home that day it was with mixed feelings and for the first time the youth thought that maybe he shouldn´t forgive Reno that easily.

Upon entering their small apartment, though, he was instantly lifted into the arms of one exuberant Reno who carried the startled young man through the corridor bridal style and sat him down on the kitchen chair. Reno had put quite some effort into decorating the table and apparently he´d cooked something good. A red table cloth was laid out, a bottle of wine was waiting to be opened, and a single candle flickered beside a rose that was put on Yazoo´s place.

Reno told him to just relax and don´t do anything because tonight it was on him to indulge his princess and with a half hearted smile Yazoo obliged. He was rather monosyllabic though, not as enthusiastic as he normally would have been if Reno had pulled something like this. He wasn´t very hungry either, and he picked at the food on his plate without really eating it and thinking about how he could possibly bring up the incident from the previous night.

Yazoo felt that maybe, it was at least time to…start talking about it or something, instead of just pretending that it would never happen again. But just as he had gathered enough courage to open his mouth, Reno spoke up, apparently oblivious to Yazoo´s unusual mood. He took his white hand into his own, smiled a little nervously and then said "Baby, I need to tell ya something."

Yazoo licked his lips, saying "That´s good, I wanted to say something too."

Reno looked at him with curiosity but Yazoo, feeling not so brave anymore, just mumbled that Reno should start, and he did.

"Okay, I´m not that good with words and stuff, yo. But we´ve been together for quite some time now, and those years with you have without question been the damn best in my life. I know it´s been difficult at times, but even during that you´ve stayed with me. I know I´m a real asshole sometimes and you probably deserve someone better than me, yo" he licked his lips, his thumb stroking over Yazoo´s palm, as he, with the other hand, fumbled in the pocket of his suit.

Then he slipped from his own chair, kneeling before Yazoo and looking up into his stunned face.

"I love you more than anything and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Yazoo. So; do you want to marry me?"

Yazoo was too overwhelmed to form a coherent sentence and so he just fell round his lover's neck, letting Reno kiss him and put the ring -to which the redhead had the equal- on his trembling hand. He didn´t know where Reno had gotten the money for such an expensive thing, but he didn´t ask either.

All misery and pain forgotten, they celebrated their engagement, making love and generally just being happy and exuberant and making plans for the future. The euphoria lasted the next day (even going so far that Yazoo invited his grumpy employer to his wedding, which he also did with the haughty triumph of showing the man how wrong he was and how Yazoo felt and that his relationship with Reno was just fine.) It was good for the next few days too, until Friday night.

Reno was out with the boys to make his engagement official and celebrate and Yazoo decided to stay home and go to bed early because he was tired from work.

It was some time shortly after midnight that he woke again as the door shut with a bang and Reno stumbled through the apartment. A moment later the bedroom door was opened and a heavy weight settled on the mattress. Crawling towards his lover, Reno nuzzled his nose into the nape of his neck, reeking of alcohol. "Hey baby, I´m back," he murmured, speech sounding a little slurred.

"Mh," Yazoo hummed drowsily, lifting his arm so Reno could slip his own around his waist.

Instead of just lying down beside him and go to sleep, the redhead apparently had other plans for the rest of the night, as his lips wandered over Yazoo´s neck towards his ear and his hand started stroking his fiancée's flat belly, pushing over the thin fabric of his sleeping shirt.

"´m tired," the silver haired teen objected, eyes still closed as he floated on the border of sleep again, but Reno wasn´t discouraged in the slightest. Instead he pressed himself against the still figure, making him feel his erection and hands and mouth becoming more forceful, his heavy breathing rushing out in pants.

"C´mon baby…" his hand roughly pulled the shirt aside, when Yazoo shifted away and sighed

"Reno I´m really tired and I have to work early…"

The hand stopped abruptly and Yazoo thought that they could go to sleep now, but he should have known better.

"Ya sayin´I hinder ya from workin?"

It was said in a cold, grave voice that made fine hairs stand up on Yazoo´s arm. Opening his eyes he instantly tried to appease him. "Of course not, I would never say such a thing."

"Yeah? Ya not sayin it, but ya thinkin it, don´t ya?" Cruel fingers pinched soft flesh and Yazoo gasped, objecting "No I don´t, really! Please stop that Reno…"

"Ya think I´m stupid or something, don´t ya?" the drunken redhead continued unfazed, pinching again and sitting up, shifting on the bed, struggling for his equilibrium. He was drunker than Yazoo had thought.

"Ya know I´m kinda sick of hearing you constantly babble about ya fuckin work," he hissed, frustration evident in his voice, and from the corner of his eye Yazoo could see Reno fumbling at his waistband.

Oh gods, not the belt please…

Lying stiffly on the bed and not daring to move, Yazoo tried his best to assure his fiancé that he hadn´t meant it like this, saying softly "I´m sorry, I won´t do it again if it offends you."

"Ya think I like feelin like a complete loser or what? Ya think I want to have no work, earn no cash ta provide ya with a nice life?" the redhead ignored every attempt to calm him down. "Well, princess, guess I have bad news for ya then."

And with that he pulled his belt from his trousers in one fluid motion.

"Cos I don´t."

While the leather strap lashed on the small figure of Yazoo -who had rolled into a ball and shielded his face with his left arm, biting his teeth to not sob or cry out and upset Reno even more- the redhead continued in his drunken ranting.

"Ya think ya something betta now or what? I bet ya do… I bet ya and ya friggin boss just sit in ya bloody little rat-shop an laugh yaself silly ´bout stupid, useless yours truly, eh? Or maybe ya doin sumthin else entirely, eh? Dun think I haven´t seen how he´s lookin at ya, princess, dat old fart wants ta fuck ya! Ya spreadin ya legs for him, eh? HEH?!"

Yazoo whimpered at a particular strong lash and tried to shake his head that no, he wasn´t fucking Cid Highwind, but Reno just snorted. "Yeah, dat´s exactly what a bloody slut like ya would do."

His face became grim suddenly as his movements stopped and his crystal blue eyes glimmered in the darkness where he knelt above Yazoo on the bed. "But ya mine princess, ya hear me? Ya won´t fuck him, yo. And ya won´t refuse me. Ever."

And to Yazoo´s utter horror he pulled down his pants and crept forward, reaching out to grab Yazoo´s wrist and strap them together with the belt so that he could not struggle while at the same time trying to force open Yazoo´s legs with his knees.

Now, in all the years and the violent attacks Reno had launched at him, he had never tried to sexually touch him against his will. Nor had Yazoo ever tried to fight back. But tonight there seemed to be a first time for both.

Suddenly jerking awake from his lethargy as the meaning of what was just about to happen finally sank in, Yazoo moved his knee up on reflex and effectively hit his lover in the crotch. Doubling over and hissing, Reno momentarily let go and Yazoo stumbled from the bed, grabbing for some clothes and fleeing out of the apartment within mere seconds, barely hearing the curses the redhead spit after him.

He was running on autopilot anyway, his only thought being to escape, go to a safe place, somewhere where Reno couldn´t get him, couldn´t do…this to him.

Almost automatically his feet carried him towards the tool shop and he still wasn´t really himself when Cid found him. It had been just so… surreal!

And then Cid had been so infuriating again, with his logic and with being so damn nosy and… and probably being right.

When his employer laid these things out to him, Yazoo always felt like a silly little boy and tried to defend his reasoning and actions, feeling even more pathetic.

He just didn´t know what to think of Cid Highwind. On the one hand he seemed a gruff, unrefined man in his 40s who didn´t give a damn about anything and just wanted to not be bothered, and then at other times it was like he actually cared about what happened to Yazoo.

He just… felt so incredibly tired.

This chapter was a little bit longer actually, but then I decided to split it and enhance the second part... So this will be next then :)

luvyuyu: Heh, yes Cid isn´t really *nice* in a normal way... But he still was, I think. In his own way :) I´m glad you liked it, thanks for reviewing!

jennie300303: I feel bad for Yazoo, too *sigh* But things will certainly change. Well and Cid... He´s probably not that good with being an emotional support, but at least he´s trying^^ He may be a bit too honest...

Valitiel: Haha, Reno is definitely drunk! As for being evil... I don´t know. I think he has a problem with keeping himself in check, but he probably isn´t really evil... We´ll see^^

Xyleel: Okay, Reno´s Gründe sind jetzt nicht wirklich gerechtfertigt... Aber irgendwie plausibel? Zumindest aus seiner Perspektive, irgendwie^^ Frustration und Alkohol vertragen sich nicht besonders gut. Aber Cid ist ja da um alles wieder heile heile zu machen XD Heh, und unter der rauen Schale verbirgt sich bestimmt ein weicher Kern;)

Koumori-chan: I get what you mean! It´s bad for Yazoo to get beaten, but with Cid there is also the chance that he could meet someone who helps him and shows him a better life! Ah, we´ll see^^

sareyva: Yah, they are such a difficult pair XD And I´m glad you´re seeing a change in their attitude! Well, I think despite the both of them being stubborn and all they get closer to each other. I mean there is only so much that Cid takes and actually Yazoo trusts him ebough that he thinks that he´s safe with him, thus running to his shop... And I guess that if Yazoo would actually really understand what Reno is doing to him he wouldn´t be together with him anymore. So he´s partly at 'fault' for the situation as well.

Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing!

Review please?