Well here's Bad Wolf, well it will be soon.

The Doctor, Rose and Jack were in Kyoto, Japan in 1336 They were happy, but then something happened that caused them to run for their lives. Jack took the lead, taking the Doctor and Rose, (who were as usual holding hands), back to the Tardis.

The three of them entered the Tardis one after another and they stood in the control room catching their breath. The Doctor walked over to his wife and hugged her tightly.

"Are you alright?" he asked her

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Good." he kissed her forehead and went to the console and set the next set of coordinates, which were for the time vortex.

The three of them were just standing in the room when a bright light appeared.

--

The next thing the Doctor knew, he was waking up in a small space, it looked like a cupboard and Rose and Jack were nowhere near him "What's happening?" he asked aloud and then he began turning around, touching the walls, trying to find the way out, when he did, he fell flat on his face.

"Oh, my God!" said a woman, she ran over to help him "I don't believe it, why did they put you in there? They never said you were coming."

"What happened, I was..." The woman helped him to his feet

"Careful now." she said "Ooh, mind yourself." the Doctor fell again "That's the transmat, it scrambles your head." she helped him up again "I was sick for days. All right?" She helped him stand and said "So, what's your name then, sweetheart?"

"The Doctor, I think." the Doctor answered "I was.... I don't know. What happened?"

"You got chosen."

"Chosen for what?"

"You're a housemate! You're in the house." she told him "Isn't that brilliant."

"That's not fair." said a man "We've got an eviction in 5 minutes. I've been here for all 9 weeks, I've followed the rules, I haven't had a single warning, then he comes swanning in."

"If they keep changing the rules, I'm gonna protest, just you watch me." said another woman. "I'm gonna paint the walls"

A robotic voice, that sounded like a recording of Davina McCall's voice said "Would the Doctor please come to the diary room."

The Doctor went to the diary room and sat down on the chair. "You are live on channel 44,000. Please do not swear."

"You have got to be kidding."

--

Rose woke up, she was in a dark room, lying on the floor. "What happened?"

"It's alright, it's just the transmat. It does your head in." said a man "You get a bit of amnesia. What's your name?"

"Rose." Rose answered "But where's the Doctor?"

"Just remember do what the android says." he told her "Don't provoke it. The android's word is law."

"What d'you mean android?" Rose asked "Like a robot?"

A woman shouted "Positions everyone. Thank you!"

"Come on." said the man holding out his hand "Hurry up." he pulled her to her feet "Steady." he said as she began to sway.

"I was travelling, with my husband, the Doctor and a man called Captain Jack. The Doctor wouldn't just leave me..."

"That's enough chat!" said the woman "Positions, final call. Good luck."

"But I'm not supposed to be here." said Rose.

"It says Rose on the podium." the man told her "Come on."

Rose walked over to the podium "Hold on." she said "I must be going mad." she looked around "It can't be. This looks like..."

"Android activated."

"Oh, my God, the android." said Rose "The Anne...droid."

"Welcome to the weakest link."

--

"Here we go again, we've got our work cut out for us."

"I don't know, he's kind of handsome. Has a good lantern jaw."

"Lantern jaws are so last year."

Jack awoke to find to robots standing over him "Sorry, but, nice to meet you, ladies, but where exactly am I?"

"We're giving you a brand-new image."

"Hold on I was with the Doctor." he said then he paused "Why? is there something wrong with what I'm wearing?"

"It's all 20th century." said one droid "Where did you get that denim?"

"A little place in Cardiff." Jack answered "It was called The Top Shop."

"Design classic." said one of the droids "But we're going to have to find you some new colours, maybe get rid of that 'Oklahoma farm-boy' thing you've got going on."

Jack stood up.

"Just stand still and let the defabricator work it's magic."

"What's the defabricator?"

A beam shot out of the device that the two droids were now standing beside and it made Jack's clothes disappear. "Okay, defabricator." Jack said "Does exactly what it says on the tin. Am I naked in front of millions of viewers?"

"Absolutely." said both of the droids

"Ladies...Your viewing figures just went up."

--

The Doctor was using the sonic screwdriver, trying to get out, so that he could find his wife and his friend, he had a bad feeling about this place and he wanted to get them out of there sharpish. "Can't open it." said the woman "It's got a deadlock seal, ever since Big Brother 504, when they all walked out, you must remember that?"

"What about this?" the Doctor asked

"Oh, that's exoglass, you'd need a neuclear bomb to get through that."

"Don't tempt me."

"I know you're not supposed to talk about the outside world, but you must have been watching." she whispered "Do people like me? Lynda, Lynda with a 'y' not linda with an 'I', she got foricibly evicted cause she damaged a camera. Am I popular?"

"I don't remember." the Doctor told her

"Does that mean I'm nothing?" Lynda asked "Some people get this far 'cause they're insignificant. Doesn't anybody notice me?"

"No, you're...nice, you're sweet." the Doctor answered "Everyone thinks you're sweet."

"Am I sweet? Really?" she asked

"Yeah." said the Doctor

"Thank you." Lynda said

The Doctor looked across the room at the wall "It's a wall. Isn't there supposed to be a garden out there?"

"Don't be daft, no one's got a garden anymore." lynda said "Who's got a garden? Dn't tell me you've got a garden"

"No, I've just got the Tardis." the Doctor said, then he remembered "I remember."

"That's the amnesia!" Lynda said "So what happened? Where did they get you?"

"We were in Kyoto, Japan, 1336 and we'd only just escaped. The three of us were together, me, my wife and our friend, we were laughing and then...there was this light, this white light coming through the walls and then...I woke up here."

"Yeah, that's the transmat beam." Lynda told him "That's how they pick the house mates."

"Oh, Lynda with a 'Y'. It's worse than that. I'm not just some passing traveller. No stupid little transmat gets inside my ship. That beam was 15million times more powerful. Which means... this isn't just a game. There's something else going on. Well, here's the latest update from the Big Brother house. I'm getting out. I'm going to find my wife and my friend. And then I'm coming to find you."

Well I've decided to put this episode into parts, so here's part one.

TTFN

Julie