Chapter 18

"My mother..." he began, but she raised a finger to his lips, shaking her head.

"You don't have to tell me." she whispered as he kissed her finger and reached up to stroke her face.

"Yes I do...I want to." She nodded softly and returned to her spot, lying in his arms. "My mother, when I was seven, she killed herself." he said quietly, feeling Serena stiffen in his arms. He stroked her arm as he continued. "My father had disappeared for countless months, with not a word as to where he was. She couldn't live without him, and so one day, she filled her pockets with stones and simply walked into the lake." he paused as he took a deep breath and Serena stroked his chest, wishing she hadn't been so hard on him. "I always believed it was because of my father's work with Nazi research that she had killed herself, but it wasn't. She loved him too much." The more he spoke, the more she understood why he had reacted the way he had and she felt shame wash over her. "My father returned a few weeks later, but I could never forgive him. I blamed him for her death, still do." he said matter-of-factly. "Her love for him killed her." She leant up on her elbow and looked into his eyes, seeing how hard and painful it had been for him to tell her that.

"I am so sorry." she told him as she stroked his cheek gently. "Thank you for telling me." She smiled gently, before frowning, thinking of something.

"What?" he asked her as she looked up at him. "You have your pondering face on." he said lightly, stroking her hair.

"Is that what you meant earlier? When you said I'd end up leaving you one day, one way or another?" He looked down and nodded his head gently. "Oh Henrik, you can't think like that." she scolded lightly, wriggling up the bed so her face was level with his. "You're right, one day that will happen, in whatever way...but that's life. We live, we love, we die." she whispered, taking his hand in hers. "We all feel pain, but it's how we know we're alive...that we're human. We feel, and sometimes yes, it does hurt, but isn't it worth it? To be able to have those moments of love and happiness? You can't avoid feeling anything because it will hurt, because starving yourself of affection is simply a different way of hurting." She stared into his eyes, hers full of love, his full of wonder at the woman in front of him. He pulled her head to his and kissed her gently, dropping his arm to her bare shoulder, stroking her skin. She pulled her head back as she smiled down at him, running her hand through his hair and then sitting up, her back against the pillows, pulling his head to her chest and holding him tight. She hadn't realised how broken he really was once you got beneath the surface or how much she had affected him in such a short space of time. She sighed, wrapping her arms around him tighter and kissed the top of his head.

"I love you." Just three small words hit her like a sledgehammer as she froze and he sat up, looking at her with an expression she hadn't seen from him before. "I love you." he said again as he reached out and took hold of her hand. She stared at him, lost for words as he came closer. "I love you!" he exclaimed as she laughed and slid down the bed until he was positioned on top of her, gazing down into her eyes.

"I love you too." she whispered, breaking into a grin as he smiled back at her and lowered his lips to hers.

"Serena? Serena we're going to be late." Hanssen complained as he raised his arm, checking his watch and sighing. Finally, after what seemed an age, the bathroom door opened and she appeared, rolling her eyes at the expression on his face.

"It doesn't take 15 minutes to walk downstairs." she reasoned as he huffed in frustration and took a seat on the end of the bed as she bent to put on her shoes. Raising her head, she caught his eyes wandering down the opening of her shirt, gaping open as she leant forwards. "Eyes up, Mister." she scolded lightly as his cheeks turned red and he looked up, clearing his throat nervously. Standing up straight, she dropped her hands to her sides and tilted her head to the side. "Will I pass?" she asked him as he smiled and stood up, standing in front of her and reaching his hands to her shoulders.

"You do more than that." he commented as he kissed her lightly and checked his watch.

"Okay, okay, I get the hint!" she sighed dramatically as she reached for her handbag and headed to the door. "But for the record, I would have been on time had someone not woken up and decided to ravish me!" she smirked, a twinkle in her eye as she opened the door and stepped out into the hallway with him close behind.

"It was impossible not to." he whispered as she chuckled and they headed for the stairs. Entering the lobby, they crossed to the restaurant which had been adapted to allow for a podium at one end of the room and tables dotted around the remaining space. Hanssen led them through the slowly-filling tables until they reached one marked 'Holby City/St James'. Ensuring Cunningham would be unable to take a seat next to Serena, he sat down and poured a glass of water from the jug in front of them, turning a second glass over and pouring one for Serena too. As he handed her the glass, a waiter appeared and asked them if they'd like coffee, both nodding eagerly.

"Thank you." she smiled, accepting the glass from him and taking a long drink.

"Thirsty, Ms. Campbell?" he asked as she gave him a wicked look.

"Morning work-out." she smiled coyly back at him as their coffee arrived and she turned to thank the waiter. Turning back and tipping sugar into the mug, she noticed Cunningham approaching them from across the room. "Oh Hell." she muttered as Hanssen looked up to what she had seen, swallowing his laughter as the Chairman arrived and sat opposite them.

"Good morning all. I trust everybody had a good night's rest?" he asked, reaching for some water as Hanssen nudged Serena's knee under the table. Cunningham looked across at Serena and smiled. "Did you sleep well?" She raised her coffee mug to her lips as she smiled.

"Oh yes, it was an exhausting evening." Taking a sip of her coffee, she noticed Hanssen coughing beside her. "Something rather large came up that really couldn't wait." she said smirking as Hanssen spluttered beside her. Turning to him slowly, she reached a hand to his back and patted it gently. "Went down the wrong hole?" she asked innocently as he glared at her. She turned back to see Cunningham was frowning.

"Careful Mr. Hanssen, I realise we are a table of Medical Professionals but do try not to choke on us." he commented, taking a sip of water and looking towards the podium as the first speaker took their place and brought the room to a hush.

"Good morning, thank you all for being here this weekend. I realise many of you have plenty of other things you could be doing with your weekend, but I truly believe each of you will leave today having gained something."

At midday, the conference broke for an hour's lunch, a buffet having been laid on for them. Hanssen and Serena both went to fetch some food and returned to their table, noticing the way Cunningham's eyes were fixed firmly on her as she took her seat. As she pulled up her chair and checked her mobile, Hanssen reached out and poured a glass of water each for them as she looked up and smiled at him in thanks. She picked up one of the napkins she'd retrieved and handed it to him as he nodded. Cunningham sat watching them both, noticing how their rhythms matched one another and they seemed completely relaxed with one another.

"So, Ms. Campbell, how is life?" Cunningham asked her as she looked up and frowned slightly.

"It's fine, thank you."

"Good, how would you like to have dinner with me tonight? I think we're due a catch-up." he smiled as she fiddled with her fork.

"Tonight is no good I'm afraid. I have a rather pressing engagement." she smiled back at him, taking a forkful of food. Hanssen noticed how Cunningham's face turned to one of anger as he took a breath.

"I see, and what is this pressing engagement?" he asked as she narrowed her eyes.

"I don't really see how that's any of your business, but since you ask...I will be on a video call with a patient." she explained, Hanssen raising his eyebrows in surprise at her excuse.

"Regarding what?"

"Well, regarding his treatment I should expect. You see, he has a rather large, throbbing problem and needs expert advice on how to manage it." she said as she reached a hand over to Hanssen's thigh under the table, squeezing it. She noticed how he maintained a cool exterior, but it was obvious to her he had stiffened and his breathing had changed.

"I see." replied Cunningham, dropping his gaze and picking at his food. Serena ate with one hand, keeping her other firmly on Hanssen's thigh. If he could do this to her in a boardroom meeting, she saw no reason why she couldn't do it here. Once the conference resumed after lunch, she removed her hand, seeing him sag slightly in disappointment. Part-way through the second half, she shifted her leg over to his, rubbing up against it. She felt him shift in his seat as he cleared his throat gently. She reached out with her hand and walked her fingers slowly up his thigh until he was forced to reach out and take her hand in his, holding it tight. She looked over at him and smiled coyly as his eyes darkened and his gaze dropped to her chest as he swallowed. With the conference drawing to a close, Serena gave his thigh one last squeeze before they stood up and instantly made for the exit.

"Mr. Hanssen! Ms. Campbell!" came a shout from behind them and they stopped, cursing at the interruption. Serena turned and smiled at a Consultant from St. James's called Douglas James, as he stopped in front of them, beaming happily. "We're all going out for dinner and would love for you to join us, NO excuses Ms. Campbell. 20 minutes." he said loudly before turning and heading back into the restaurant. Serena turned to Hanssen and sighed, heading to the stairwell. As they reached her floor, he told her he'd change quickly and be right down. Rushing to her room, she ripped open her bag, delving to the bottom where she found the black dress. Frowning nervously, she decided she'd try it on and see how she looked. Pulling on a pair of black tights first, she proceeded to pull the dress over her head. She stood in front of the mirror, examining herself, smoothing down the outer netting detail as she turned to look at the back. Heading back to her bag, she removed a pair of black heels and pulled them on, returning to the mirror. She felt good, but also slightly wary that Hanssen hadn't seen her in a dress like this before. As she reapplied a little make-up, there was a knock at the door and she went to answer it. Pulling open the door, Hanssen's jaw dropped, almost comically, as he took in the sight before him. The dress fitted her body perfectly, accentuating its' curvature as well as being slimming. She stood nervously before him, biting her lip as she waited for him to say something.

"Well..." he swallowed as he reached for her hips and pushed her back into the room, kissing her passionately and leaning her back against the wall. She felt his hands lower to her thighs as he dropped his head to kiss her neck, running his hands over her behind and up her back. His breathing began to increase as she arched her back into him and his mouth came down on hers once again. She suddenly made a sound and Hanssen pulled away looking at her.

"We should be heading down." she said breathlessly. "I know how you're Mr. Early." she commented as he reached a hand down past her stomach and kept going until she inhaled sharply.

"I don't think a few minutes will hurt." he smiled as her eyes widened.