The shortness isn't because I couldn't think of anything to write. lol. It's short for a reason, mostly because it's so amazingly impacting that it needs to be its own segment. This is the beginning of a new chapter for our green haired friend.

Song for this Chapter: Be Sensible → Jimmy Eat World. I am in love with this song. It's so beautiful.

Dislclaimer: Slight Stephenie Meyer influence.

Chapter 44: Numb

There is a rush when you realize that what you have been searching for all along was right under your fingertips.

First, there is the shock. It courses through your veins, embedding itself in your chest and pulsating to your fingers and toes. It is nearly like a numbing feeling, as it diffuses through every vital organ but is never in reach. Above all, the shock is dizzying. Blackness seems to creep through the back of your mind until it crawls into your eyesight. Fainting is a reprieve from the numbness—as if it's your body's way of alerting you that you have gone too far.

Phase two commences with the rush of emotions that at the previous point, you lack. It sucks you in and under, so that instead of treading in water, you're drowning—pulling you into a plethora of feelings that suffocate more than awaken you. The sensation is crippling. It toys with the tempo of your heart, making it completely untraceable and sporadic, causing your whole body to become disheveled. You hyperventilate—since the mechanics of breathing have completely lost its motors. Frankly, it's stupid—it's absurd...and a hundred times more worse than imaginable.

All you can do is slowly go to pieces privately.

But everything concludes itself with the actual realization of the matter—and that alone is perhaps the worst factor. It is the logical reasoning behind all instinctual emotion—beyond all natural comfort. It alone is the physical proof and therefore is the solid impact of everyday life. It alerts you to everything—much more than shock or emotion.

Romeli was far beyond phase one and two. She was trapped inside the daunting feeling of realization, and could not shake it away. She was kneeling over the ancient trunk, it's contents sprawled around her in every direction—not in the least orderly. She didn't care...because only one thought could race through her mind—with thousands of excerpts of logic backed behind it.

This. Changed. Everything.

All at one moment, everything made sense. Everything said to her, and everything she'd heard finally clicked into a single orientation. And yet, none of it seemed real. None of it really made any sense. A part of her couldn't comprehend the fact that this actually mattered...that it had come to this and only this. When she thought one chapter of her life was finally complete...it was reborn again for re-editing.

And that was very very annoying.

She stood up and plopped herself on her bed, holding her hands against her head wearily, fighting back tremors of rage, fear...hopelessness.

So. She knew what her scars meant. Only now she wished she didn't. A thrill rippled through her and she hated it. The fact punctured all hope of a normal life...all hope of a life at all.

Her ears felt stopped up as she curled into a ball and stared at the white wall in front of her. Her mind went in circles, frantically searching for a way out of this mess. There was no escape, and she knew it. There was only one possible end looming darkly in her future. The only question was how many people she would hurt before it was over.

Everything. Was over.

But it hadn't happened yet.

No. This wasn't the end of the world. Not quite. It was just the end of what little peace was left behind.

Ah yes. The mystery of her scars continue as we sink back into an emotional battlefield.

Replies:

StarlightRoses: omg that's so amazing! you actually read it in a week? I'm impressed...I could never do it...I'm just really flattered you did! Thanks so much! ah! love you! I really hope that I can publish this...I think it has a lot of potential as a good teen book. lol. No one has had their fill of James/Romeli. I don't even know what I'm going to do.

Gen: haha. I did take pretty long, and this is a TINY chapter. like...the shortest one yet? don't cry! (pats back)

princessofcrown101: O.O a whole day? I'm so impressed. your dedication awards you with an award. (gives cookies)

erin-walker: ONE DAY?!?!?!? good lord. I must be a slow reader. this would take me like two years to read...just kidding. A lot of people tend to say that...the 'omg did that really happen'. I don't even know what I'm doing. something pops in my head and I fly with it.

itachihater13: lol. I'm glad you think so! I hope my fighting action was okay. Like I said...I had to read Dan Brown's Demons and Angels before I could start reading, because I wanted to grasp his style of writing...which I failed at...but whatev. omg. the newlyweds! i don't even know how that popped in my head.

x17SkmBdrchiczxx: yay action! it's a change of pace...which stops about there. lol. Romeli's butt kicking action was slightly OC considering she just went through all that crap...but I guess it fits. Yes, D'mitri does have a brother. Fredrin--who was Maggur's right-hand man. He is in the previous chapters during Romeli's servitude.

darkness-0: well...Romeli knows about the scars...but you don't! not for...umm...more chapters.

see ya Moosies around

Keep Moosin'