PROLOGUE: HIDAN'S NEW PARTNER

Hidan was making his way back to base when he heard a child's laughter turn to horrified screams. "LEAVE ME ALONE! BROTHER, HELP ME!" A 12-year-old girl was surrounded by bandits. He needed some new blood. He made quick work of the bandits, then collasped in pain. Obviously, their blood hadn't been enough to heal him. He blacked out. The girl rushed over to his limp form, and began shaking him. "Sir. SIR!"

He awoke in a small tent. "What the fuck just happened?"

"You got hurt. Thanks for saving me." Hidan glanced up, and saw the little bitch who had gotten him into this. "Sorry about all this, but your arm is broken, and your ribs are bruised. What'd you do to get so banged up?" He flopped back against the pillows, stared at the ceiling, and didn't respond. "I'm Shira. What's your name?"

Grunt.

"Hi, Grunt-san!" He stared at the little fucker. I'm in Hell.

Shira skipped after Hidan, carrying his sword. She had insisted his arm wasn't healed properly, so he couldn't carry it quite yet. "This thing is HUGE! How do you lug it around all the time? I like your cloak! I want one just like it someday!"

Hidan awoke to bitter cold, and realized his cloak was missing. Sighing, he stepped outside to see the brat cooking while wearing his cloak. She looked up, and a huge blush came over her face. "U-U-Um, I-I-I-" She silently handed him the cloak, and sat down, still blushing. "S-Sorry, Grunt-san. I-I just got cold, and your cloak looked warm-"

Shira trailed after Hidan, thinking about him. He was attractive, but a little old. "Grunt-san, how old are you?"

"22. Now shut the fuck up."

So he was almost twice her age, and had that sort of 'bad-boy' aura around him. They stopped just outside base, and Itachi and Kisame lept down. Shira's eyes fell on Kisame, and she screamed, hiding behind Hidan. "Grunt-san, he's a shark!" Kisame's mouth twitched, and then he burst into hysterical laughter. "G-GRUNT-SAN!?"

"What's going on?" Deidara and Sasori had just come over. "This kid called Hidan 'Grunt-san'." Deidara and Sasori began laughing as well. Hidan was twitching. Must-not-kill.Shira stared at Deidara. "Oooo, you're pretty! Like a princess!" Deidara stopped laughing, and he reached for his clay. He sent a bird flying at her, and she exploded. Suddenly, she tapped him on the shoulder, perfectly healthy and not a scratch on her. Itachi lifted an eyebrow. "Pein's going to want to see this."

Pein and Konan stared down at the girl, who had just been decapitated by Hidan, and stood giggling in front of them. "Is there anything else you can do?" Shira nodded. "A few things, but I'm still learning them." She took in a deep breath, nodding at Deidara, who sent a large bird at her as he rode it. She dodged it again and again. "Are you good with weaponry?"

She bit her lip. "I'm good at chakra-blocking, and I could stand to learn a bit more than the basics about weaponry."

"You're hired. Hidan needs a new partner anyway."

"Pein, don't do this. I will fucking kill you!"

"Are you joking? I've been waiting for years for this moment to arrive. Shira, you are now Hidan's new partner. Konan, have her outfitted for a cloak." Shira smiled, tackling Hidan. "Hidan no danna, I did it!" He twitched. "Can I fucking kill her?"

Pein shrugged. "It won't work."

"It'd make me feel better." Konan slapped both of them. "She's a cute little kid! Stop thinking about killing her, and you stop thinking about letting him kill her!"

Half an hour later, Shira wore a child's Akatsuki coat. Konan straightened Shira's cloak, and stood up. Pein spoke. "Over the next two years, you will train here on base. When we feel you're ready, we'll allow you to accompany Hidan on missions." Shira nodded, smiling. "Okay!"