A/N: Whoa Thank you guys so much for the feed back. I'm glad you like it. I was super nervious. So a few of you wanted to know Rachel's feeling about this and why did that to Quinn so fron this chapter on the story it's going to be from both of their POVs.
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or it's characters.
Hope you like it.
Quinn had no idea how long she had been walking around in Central Park but she knew it was late and that she should probably go to Santana's to stay the night but for some reason she felt like she couldn't face her best friends right now. Her phone have been going crazy for the las two hours but she didn't even bother to look a it anymore knowing it was probably Rachel calling her to come back home. Home. She used to think Rachel was that to her. Her safe place. Maybe not anymore. She didn't think she had anymore tears to cry. She'd known tonight's conversation could've go bad but she didn't think it would be like that. Thinking that maybe Rachel didn't love her anymore was hard but actually hearing her say it it's heartbreaking.
Her phone kept buzzing on her jacket pocket. Why can't she just leave her alone? It was her who basically said she didn't want anything to do with Quinn anymore. So why don't just let her be? With a deep sigh she took her phone out to see that she had twenty two missed calls. Eleven from Rachel eight from Santana and three from Brittany. She figured Rachel must've called them to check if I was there. She also had four voicemails and 27 texts all from her wife. She thought about opening the texts but decided against it. She's had enough pain for one night. So she deleted all without reading them. She thought about calling Santana to let her know she was okay but then she had to talk to her and right now she doesn't want to talk to anyone.
I'll be there in a few hours.
She pressed send and after thinking about it for a minute she decided she was getting drunk. She make her to the partly busy New York street and hailed a cab. After giving the driver the address of the bar she was heading she checked her phone to see that Santana had replied asking her where she was but she ignored it. She was sure her best friend would come and make her come home and right now the only thing she needed was a really strong drink. As the cab pulled over in front of the busy bar she paid and went inside. Sitting on the last bar stool on the corner.
"What can I get you?" asked the redheaded bartender offering her a half smile. Quinn found herself smiling back.
"Vodka Tonic please." she said Adjusting herself in the stool.
"Coming right up." said the girl as she went to mix her drink. Quinn started looking around the bar. It's been a while since she'd come here. It wasn't her kind of place. It was dark and dingy and she thinks it's the kind of place old married bussines men came to meet their flings. It was just the kind of vibe the place gave her. There was music playing on the backround and a few people scattered around the dark booths in the coners. "Here you go." the girl placed the tall glass in front of Quinn.
"Thank you." replied Quinn while taking the first gulp of her drink watching as the girl nodded her head and went to take the order of another costumer. Quinn got lost in thought and before she knew it her first drink was gone and she was gesturing to the redheaded bartender to give her a new one. This time when she put the drink in front of Quinn she didn't hesitate and took another long gulp of the drink. Took a breath and finished it putting the glass back in front of her.
"Whoa rough night?" asked the bartender leaning against the counter.
"Like you wouldn't believe." aswered Quinn while playing with the straw on her now empty glass. "I don't think it could get any worst." said while pushing the glass towards th girl whose name tag she just noticed. It read "Joan" in bold letters. The girl started making the third drink while looking at Quinn now and then with curious eyes. "What?" she asked noticing the way Joan was looking at her. The girl shrugged her shoulders.
"Nothing. You're just not the kind of person that normally comes into this place." said while putting the glass in front of Quinn again. Who this time just took a sip and put it back down not wanting to get buzzed that fast and already starting to feel a little loose because of the first two.
"And what kind of person is that?" asked Quinn with a raised eyebrow. The redhead shrugged again.
"You don't look like an old lawyer looking for a place to meet their secretary." she said with smirk and a playfull look on her face.
"I don't have a secretary." replaid Quinn with a smirk of her own. The girl chuckled.
"So you are meeting someone. Just not a secretary?" asked Joan leaning against the counter once again.
"Who knows? Maybe l'm meeting someone else's secretary." said Quinn while drinking from her almost half empty glass. Making the girl chuckle again. "I'm kidding by the way. Not meeting anyone. Just getting drunk." she said by taking a gulp of the clear liquid.
"You'll be getting drunk pretty fast at that pace." she said while taking a towel hanging on her shoulder and cleaning the counter. Quinn finished the drink and asked for another one.
"That's the plan." The faster the better. Quinn thought.
_/
Rachel couldn't believe she told that to Quinn. She was just so stressed with work and life and she had come home knowing Quinn would be waiting for her but she honestly didn't have the mental strenght to have that conversation with her. Even though she knows she's been delaying it for months. She just wanted to take a bath and go to bed. But Quinn wasn't taking no for an answer tonight. She wasn't suprised really. She knows she's been pushing Quinn away for a while now. At first it was unconsciously. She'd take the kids to school and go to work and at the end of the day she'd be so exhausted that she's just go to bed without even a kiss goodnight from her wife. As the weeks went by and her schedule got more crazy and she settled on the same routine. Take the kids to school, go to work, have dinner when she was home in time, spend a little time with the twins before putting them to bed and go to sleep herself. As the weeks went by she knew what was happening but life was so exhausting that she didn't gave a lot a thought to what this was doing to her marriage. But still she couldn't believe she said to Quinn, her wife, the love of her life. That she didn't love her.
She kept repeating the conversation in her head. How quickly it had escalated. From turning dinner down to screaming at each other. From the moment those words had come out of her mouth she had wanted to take them back. Not just because they couldn't be farther from the truth but because the look on her wife's face when she looked up from the spot she was looking at on the ground. It has been so heartbreaking. Even though they had been tears running down her cheeks. Her face had been emotionless. Her normally expresive eyes had been cold and that's what scared Rachel the most. Quinn was a very expresive person and to watch her like that make Rachel think that this time she had really lost Quinn. Because never in all the arguments they've had in the past she had seen her like that. But the again, she had never told Quinn she didn't love her before. She had been in the exact same spot since Quinn left. Staring at the exact same spot on the cealing of their bedroom. Tears running down her face. Replaying the conversation in her head. But what she couldn't stop thinking about was the last words out of her wife's mouth.
We'll start the divorce process when Iget back.
Divorce. She couldn't even even think about it without wanting to throw up. She never thought she and Quinn would get a divorce. They've been Rachel and Quinn for so long that she couldn't imagine them being apart. When she had called Quinn more than ten times -knowing that her wife wouldn't pick up but she tried anyway- she called Santana to check if Quinn was there. Knowing it was more likely where she would spend the night but she wasn't there and Santana hadn't heard of her. She told her to contact her if Quinn went there so she could know that she was okay. But that call hadn't come yet. It had been three hours since that and Rachel had left over a dozen text messages that were unaswered too. She thought that maybe Quinn was already at Santana's and maybe Santana was to pissed at her to even confirm that her wife was there. But then decided against it. Santana wouldn't do that to her and even if she did Brittany wouldn't. So she waited and while she waited she cried.
God she missed her kids. In times where Rachel was sick or sad her babies were her medicine. They would give her cuddles and hugs and she'd instantly would feel much better. But tonight she was on her own. She thought about calling Brittany to maybe talk to them on the phone but it was a little bit after midnight and she knew they would be sleeping and she wasn't going to wake them just because she was a mess.
She was so angry at herself. If she hadn't turned down dinner with her wife maybe they would've talked things out and then they would've had really hot make up sex and her wife would be holding her right now. But no. She had to go and fuck everything up. She didn't want her marriage to end. Hell she couldn't even bear the thought of being away from Quinn. She needed to talk to her. She needed to explain and apologize. She couldn't let the best thing that happened to her -apart from the twins- go. She was going to fight for her. She was going to work hard on fixing their marriage. Getting up and taking her phone from where it had been resting on the nightstand. Noticing the picture there brough a fresh wave of tears to her eyes. It was a picture of their wedding day. They had a little reception after and this was the picture of their first dance. Quinn had been wearing black dress pants a white button down shirt with a black vest and black bowtie. She had been wearing a strapless white dress. They looked perfect and the picture was beautiful. Neither of them were looking at the camera. The were looking at each other. Both sporting the biggest smiles anyone had ever seen on their faces. That was the happiest day of her life. Right after the day their babies were born.
"I Love you Rachel." said Quinn pressing her closer against her body and kissing her temple as they danced to the lyrics of 'A thousand Years'by Christina Perri. Iknow really cliche but well they were both suckers for romance.
"I love you more." she said tightening her hands around Quinns neck while leaning back so she could look into those pools of hazel that she loved getting lost in.
"Not possible." said the blonde with that little smile she reserved just for Rachel squeezing her waist. Her smile got lost on Rachel's mouth as she brought their lips together in a soft kiss that left them both breathless and with a huge smile on both of their faces.
That's when the picture has been taken.
Putting the picture back down she unlocked her phone and decided to call her wife one last time for tonight. Knowing really well that it was going to be unaswered she prepared herself to leave a voicemail.
Hey, This is Quinn Fabray. I can't pick up the phone right now please leave a message.
"Hey Quinn it's me. I know I'm the last person you want to hear right now. You probably hate me but I just want to know that you're okay. I'm so sorry for what I said baby. I don't even know why I said it as is not farther from the truth. Please just come home so we can-" Beep.
With a sight Rachel ended the call drying the tears from her face she went to her drawer took some underwear and was going to take a tank top to wear with it to bed but decided against it. She went to Quinn's drawer and took one of her sweatshirts. It'll make her feel closer to her plus she always loved wearing Quinn's clothes. Tomorrow she had an early rehearsal but after that her day was free and she was hoping to talk to Quinn and hopefully fix things with the love of her life.
_/
Quinn was really drunk. She knew when her vision started to blur that she should've stoped drinking but she couldn't. She was enjoying talking to Joan. She was nice and funny. The've been talking all night. She found helself liking the girl. She wanted to erase tonights events from her mind and now she was pretty sure that if she looked at herself in the mirror she wouldn't recognize herself. She looked up from the empty glass in her hand and gestured to Joan. As the girl make her way to her she felt he phone vibrating in her side pocket. By the time she thought about taking it out to check who was calling her it had stopped so she didn't bother. As Joan got to her she gestured for the girl to refill her glass but the bartender saw how buzzed she was and shocked her head.
"I think that's enough for you tonight honey." she said once again leaning against the counter in front of a very very drunk Quinn.
"Come ooon. Just one more. It's not like I'm gonna drive home." she said trying to convince the redhead with a goofy grin on her face. Joan thought she looked adorable trying to stay upright on the bar stool and chuckled.
"Fine. This one's on the house since it's your last one." Quinn nodded violently goofy grin still in place making Joan chuckle once again. She went and intead of mixing a drink she poured a tall glass of water -she figured the woman wouldn't notice the difference since she was completely wasted- and put it in front of Quinn who was swaying to the music with a grin still present on her face. Joan thought the girl was a super adorable drunk. Quinn took a sip and wrinkled her face.
"This is water!" she said eyeing the glass reproachfully making Joan giggle at her.
"Yeah. You' should thank me for that. Tomorrow you wont be able to get up from your bed." she replaid cleaning the counter again. Quinn made a disgusted face thinking about the massive hangover she's going to have tomorrow.
"Fine. But you owe me that drink." she said trying to sound stern but at the end let out a hiccup making Joan laugh once again.
"Want me to call you a cab? Or is there anyone I can call to pick you up?" she said looking as Quinn took another sip of the water befor deciding she didn't wanted it and pussing the glass away from her.
"I can call them. I'll call them now." she said taking out her phone from her side pocket and seeing that she two missed calls. One from her wife wich she assumed so was the voicemail and one from Santana. She felt bad calling this late but she knew Santana would wanted her to call. Sure she was going to be a bitch about it but Santana it's a bitch about everything so she wasn't worried. She pressed call. After a few rings she heard the voice of her best friend over the line.
"Finally! Where the hells are you Q? I've been worried that something had happened to your skinny ass pendejo!" said Santana in one breath. Quinn giggled.
"I'm fiiine San and my ass is not skinny my ass is hooot. You wishh you could to get all up on thiis." she said with a hiccup while gesturing to her body causing her to drop the phone on the counter making Joan giggle. "Upps" she heard Santana groan over the phone as she brought it back to her ear.
"Yeah you wish blondie. Where are you asshole?" said the annoyed Latina.
"I don't know. Where I'm I?" she asked the bartender who had been listening to the conversation with an amused expresion on her face. Joan took the phone from Quinn's hand, explained to the latina where she was and gave the phone back to her. Quinn was watching her intently.
"Your eyes are pretty." said Quinn looking at Joan's grey eyes making her blush and look down.
"Thanks. So are yours." she said making herself busy by cleaning the counter wich was clean already but Quinn's gaze was making her kind of nevious.
"Thank you. So are yours. I already said that" said a giggling Quinn. Making Joan giggle herself. This girl was so adorable.
"Yeah you did. You should drink your water" she said gesturing to the glass in front of Quinn.
"Water is boring." she said pushing the glass further away from her. Joan chuckled and left to keep serving to the other drunks who weren't as adorable as Quinn -like at all- but oh well that's the job.
Less than half an hour later a very anoyed looking Latina entered the bar and went straight to Quinn.
"Let's get out of here Q." Santana said putting her hand on Quinn's shoulder to help her up.
"Saaan. You're here. Want a drink?" she said grinning up at her. The Latina rolled her eyes.
"No Q, I don't want a drink we need to go. Have you paid yet?" Santana said looking at the bartender -who had made her way to them while mixing a drink for another guy- for an anwer.
"Not yet." said Joan as Quinn fished a few bills out of her pocket and put them down on the counter and looked at the redhead.
"Keep the change." said Quinn with a grin that Joan returned with a "thank you."
"Let's go San." Santana help her out of the stool and out of the bar. When she put her on the passenger seat of her car and climbed in.
"Seriously Q. Decided to kill a part of your liver tonight? What the hells happened with Berry? She called me hysterical asking if you were with me and Britts. FABRAY! Stay with me I'm talking to you!" she said looking at her best friend who looked like she was going to pass out any second now. Quinn opened her eyes a little bit.
"I'm getting a divorce." her voice was small and then she passed out.
"What?" asked the Latina to the empty car. That wasn't what she was expecting at all. Quinn and Berry couldn't get a divorce. They wer fucking soulmates. She'll wait until tomorrow and then talk to her and then maybe go kick the Hobbits ass for hurting her best friend. That reminded her that Rachel was waiting for a text of hers.
Q's fine. She'll be staying at my place.
It went unaswered she guessed Berry was sleeping. She started the car and left to go home. Tomorrow she'll get to the bottom of this.
Tell me what do you guys think. I take suggestions. Let me know.
-k