So, I hate to break it to you guys, but this is the last chapter. I will be starting a new series, adding a few oneshots, and continuing You only wear shorts once a week.

Slight WARNING: This chapters deals with depression, self harm, mention of anxiety and bulimia, and slight feels. Don't read if this triggers you. #depression #selfharm #anxietyandbulimia #sadandhappyfeels

Diclaimer: Any Homestuck characters used in this fanfic are not owned by me, they belong to Hussie. As does your soul.

Confrontations, demons, and fighting back

I buried my face into the warm pillow, I should of known this was going to happen soon. Well, to be honest I did, but I just didn't think much about it...

I was dumb to think I'd be able to keep cutting forever, harming myself with the blade coated in my candy blood. Gamzee had known of my blood color for a while, and he had enough trouble soothing me back to normal. He had called me his candy angel, yeah an angel, perhaps a fallen angel who had been kicked out of heaven!

Harming those around me was something I had never wanted to do, I never meant to hurt my friends. It was only supposed to affect me. Yet, of course, nothing goes my way.

'Ughh.' Look at me, going on an emotional roller coaster ride. It's so stupid of me to be blabbing on in my mind like this. If I was speaking aloud it'd be worse than Kankri when on when of his speeches. That itself was a disaster, though it didn't really bother me too much.

Maybe another nap would be good, I was certainly tired enough to take one... Might as well take advantage of the opportunity.

...

When I woke again the room was bright, birds chirping and all that happymorningfuntime stuff. I glanced at my clock to see it was 4 in the afternoon, holy shit. I looked up again, and almost screamed when Gamzee popped into view.

"Holy jegus Gamzee," I muttered, "don't fucking pop out of nowhere..." Midway through my sentence I stopped, suddenly feeling the atmosphere around us. Why was I talking shit about him, it's me with the issues here.

My eyes moved to the floor, finding it more interesting than Gamzee's face. I shifted, trying to get comfy, when a surge of pain went through my body. I had been sleeping on my fucking cuts, and they had reopened.

I let out a pained cry and sat up, almost head butting Gamzee as he leaned closer to clean up my scars. I shifted awkwardly, avoiding eye contact and trying not to cover my arms. An instinct I picked up...

"Sis," I secretly looked at him, keeping my head down, "why didn't you tell me? Aren't we moirals?" I could feel my heart aching, arms itching with the desire to recieve more cuts.

We were silent for a few minutes, and each second that went by broke my heart more. I wanted to tell him everything, but I couldn't, I couldn't move my mouth. The darkness was trapping me, not letting anyone in and not letting me free.

"Leave." 'No please!' "I'm fine, leave me alone." 'I'M NOT FINE!' "I fucking hate you, GET THE FUCK AWAY AND DON'T COME BACK." 'NO!'

"..."

"J-just, FUCKING," the tears began to spill, "I... just, fuck, don't... Leave now." I tried to will my words out, but I couldn't. All I could do was watch silently in horror as he stood up and walked to the door.

"No," I whispered quietly, "I DON'T WANT HIM TO GO!" I wouldn't let this fucking demon order me. He was the one I loved, and if he left, I'd never be able to fight back.

"Don't listen Gamzee," I cried, "it wants you to... to think I hate... you."

"Sis?"

"I don't want you to go! If you're gone then I'll be alone, if you leave the pain will stay! I don't want it, its like I'm trapped... It's always dark but when you're here it's nice and sunny." The tears wouldn't stop, I could feel myself shaking.

It was cold.

Without him,

I was a mess.

I needed him...

"I..." I looked at him, smiling slightly, "I'm flushed for you, Gamzee Makara. No one else, just you..."

So much weight lifted off me, it felt like I was a bit stronger, but nervousness filled me. If he left me I'd be destroyed...

"Karsie," warmness spread throughout my body, "flushed for you too sis."

...

3 months later

I smiled as I walked home on my way from work. It was a crisp autumn day, with a slight breeze in the wind. Maybe it was Egbert's doing. I didn't pay too much attention to it. Today was special.

It was me and Gamzee's three month anniversary. Since that day, things had gotten better. We spent that night hugging on the sofa, watching romcoms and other movies. Talking about our past and funny stories. For once in my life I truly felt happy. I was nestled on his chest, a blanket over us both, and a bag on potato crisps on my back as Gamzee devoured them.

I hadn't felt like eating, though Gamzee made me promise him I'd eat the next day. I happily did. Another promise was that I tell him where all my blades were, and that we dispose of them. He said tomorrow we would do that, and he'd take me to a hospital. I was a bit nervous, but I would do anything to keep him with me.

I decided I would text Nepeta the next day, telling her all that happened, and I'd probably also thank her. If it wasn't for her, this wouldn't of happened, and I probably would've been raped by those guys...

The next day we had a huge meal together, collected all my blades, and then gone to the hospital. The doctors had run tests on me, confirming I had depression, but also had anxiety problems and self harm issues. No shit. They gave me antidepressants and some other pills, and sent me to a seminar/once a week group thing.

By the fourth week, I was feeling better. I hadn't cut at all, though sometimes it would itch so badly I'd cry and throw up. I slowly came out of depression, though to this day I still have to take the pills. My anxiety went back to normal, and I finally had a real life.

I was attending my weekly class when they asked for anyone who would be willing to go on a "tour" with them around schools. My hand immediately went up, and so I went around, telling different schools my story and helping kids with their own. After the tour, they had asked if I wanted to work with them, teaching seminars but also performing.

Apparently the group had a band who was looking for a new singer. I had almost declined, but then remembered my past love for singing. I also had a part time job at a small cafe, playing the grand piano and singing. I felt happy with myself, and Gamzee would say he was so proud.

We had moved into a house together a week or so ago. It wasn't actually a house, but we brought a room in an apartment. It was on the second floor, and had 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, and a huge living room. The actually building had a whole gym area, and a pool. I had been reluctant to go swimming at first, as some of my scars were still dark. After a week of begging Gamz got me into the pool, and it was there that I met a girl my age.

She had bulimia and was currently on medication and lessons. We became great friends, and would often go out for walks or go grab drinks together. After a week of being friends see told me she was a lesbian and had a girlfriend, and then I told her I had several lesbian and gay friends. It was then that I introduced her to Rose and Kanaya, and Dave and John.

My life was finally together. I was no longer worried. My issues had begun to fade, leaving me normal.

I was happy...

Call me sappy, but I cried when writing her yelling at Gamzee. I don't suffer from depression myself, but I almost have, several times. Everyone has problems, but they're all different, one way or another. If you suffer from depression, bulimia, or whatever, just know that there's always someone there. You can talk to someone, it may be hard, but it's possible. Keep fighting. Slam a faygo.

XOXO