Lembas and Wild Turkey

"Men like sports. Men watch the action movie,
they eat of the beef, and enjoy to look at the bosoms.
A thousand years of avenging our wrongs and that's all you've learned?" -
Xander, (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

Towers of Thangorodrim, Angband Fortress, far northern Beleriand

Alun Davies struggled to make out the shadowed face under the cowl, but the darkness in the room was such that it effectively made the dark figure who called himself Sauron look utterly faceless, something which didn't exactly fill him with reassurance despite the pleasant voice. He decided therefore to make all of his replies fairly neutral as far as he could.

"Thank you for your hospitality." He responded dryly. "However I'd be much obliged if you could tell me where I am and why I'm here."

He couldn't see the smile, but he could sense that Sauron was smiling somewhere inside the blackness where his face should have been.

"Indeed, you must be curious and I will answer all of your questions…all in good time. For the moment it must suffice you to know that you are in Thangorodrim, the stronghold of Lord Morgoth Bauglir and you are quite safe. For now at least."

A knock at the door turned both of their attentions in that direction. "Come!" Sauron's voice was commanding. Obviously someone who expected to be obeyed without question Alun surmised. Sauron waved a languid hand in the general direction of the heavy wooden door and it swung open as if by an unspoken command. Alun held his breath. After his discussion with the Valar he had met in his dreams he wasn't sure what he was expecting in this place of deep shadows and dark deeds, however the individual who came through the door carrying a heavy tray was most decidedly human-looking.

From his dark complexion and slightly almond-shaped dark, limpid eyes Alun decided that he came from the lands to the East, probably what would be India or Pakistan in his modern world, or perhaps even from one of the Islamic countries. The man moved silently into the room, placed the tray, on which Alun could now see was food and drink, on the table indicated to him by Sauron and then he backed out of the room as silently as he came. The heavy door swung shut and thudded solidly into the frame. Not a door that he could break down and make his escape then, Alun thought in dismay.

"No indeed." Sauron's voice sounded coolly amused. "The door is very solidly made, but more to the point, it is kept shut and protected by powerful spells and wards."

"To keep me in? I'm flattered." Alun commented quietly.

So this creature could see his thoughts. He would have to be more guarded with them, although he had the distinct impression that if Sauron really wanted to, he could see almost everything in Alun's head. Just as well that Irmo had woven a soft web of deception around the meeting in his dream state. He could remember all that had happened between him and the Valar, but Sauron would not have the power to pierce the web. However Irmo had cautioned him that if Sauron decided to take him in front of Morgoth, the protection would not hold for long.

"Partly, but even were you to 'escape' from this room, it is doubtful you would get very far before being apprehended by the guards." There was a distinct note of laughter in Sauron's smooth tones now. "However, the idea is as much to keep unwanted visitors out as it is to keep you in." He gestured to the tray. "In the meantime, please do eat something. I understand that you were plucked from the bosom of your family before you managed to eat dinner."

That at least confirmed that Sauron was not aware that he had been hijacked by the Valar. Alun had both eaten fruit and drunk some wine with them. Or perhaps that was dream fruit and dream wine and therefore didn't count as sustenance. He was aware that his thought processes felt a little woolly and muddled and his stomach was definitely now hurting. Perhaps something to eat would be a good idea, so he nodded and Sauron lifted a cover from one of the plates to reveal some slices of what looked and smelled very much like roast chicken. All the same, he silently heeded another warning sent to him by Irmo in thought. Be careful what you eat there. I doubt that Sauron will feed you anything poisonous or the flesh of another sentient being because he wants something from you. Just be mindful and aware that your food could be drugged.

He therefore took the plate and prodded the meat suspiciously with the fork that Sauron handed to him.

"It is just the meat of a large local bird which used to proliferate around this area." Sauron continued smoothly. "Sadly they are no longer in existence here. Our hunters have to go far and wide to find them. As I understand it, the taste will be similar to something you call turkey. The vegetables are, I imagine, fairly common to your own dimension, although doubtless they have other names there. However your caution is laudable, for it shows you are a man who considers his actions carefully and in that you will suit my purpose admirably."

Alun helped himself to vegetables, which appeared to be roast potatoes and boiled carrots, and speared a piece of the meat on the fork. He drew a long breath and put it in his mouth. He could sense Sauron waiting and he also sensed the same amusement from him as he chewed the meat tentatively. He expelled a relieved breath as the delicious taste, somewhere between a turkey and perhaps a duck, probably because of the diet of the bird, exploded on his palate. Sauron did actually laugh out loud as Alun, hungry now for real, tucked into the meal with gusto.

"I see our culinary efforts meet with your approval, so I will leave you to enjoy your meal." Sauron drawled. Alun looked up, a question clear in his eyes. "We will speak of your task after you have eaten and refreshed yourself. The servants will fetch water for you to clean yourself with after they take the tray away. Heed my earlier words though, do not use their presence to force your way past. There are many things in this fortress that would have no compunction in ending your existence just for the sheer pleasure of it."

Alun opened his mouth to speak, but Sauron had already moved to the door which again swung open at some silent command. This time Alun strained to see what was outside the door, but saw only the inky blackness which seemed to swallow Sauron up. Or was it that he had actually become part of the blackness? A shiver of real fear caused the hairs on the back of his neck to stand up. Obviously escape under his own steam here was not going to be an option. He was just going to have to go along with whatever happened and seize his chance when he could.

Whatever this task was, Sauron was not going to be an easy taskmaster. Alun was going to have to play his hand very carefully if he wanted to come out of this in one piece. The trouble was that he had the distinct impression that whatever this creature did with him if he didn't go along with his plans would involve a fate a lot worse than death.

ooOoo

The camp of the Host of the Valar, northern Beleriand

Gary thanked the young elf who had helped him off with the magnificent armour Eonwe usually wore into battle and took the goblet of wine offered him by Tulcas with a smile of gratitude and a huge sigh of relief. The Vala gave him a quizzical look and sat down on one of the chairs around the small table which was groaning under the weight of the dinner that had been brought in earlier.

"That was an unusually fierce battle." He commented.

Gary sipped the wine and stretched his neck to the left and to the right to try to release some tension. "It was and I am not really used to carrying that sort of weight around when I fight." He said ruefully.

"You were particularly… intense." Tulcas stared intently at him. "I must admit I had never actually seen anyone fight in quite such an interesting fashion before."

A grin split Gary's face. "If you're referring to the fact that I used my head, fists and knees as well as the sword, I do not ask forgiveness for not fighting in an honourable way. Sometimes a Glasgow kiss will do just as well to immobilise an opponent as the flat edge of a sword."

Tulcas threw back his leonine head and roared with laughter. "What in the name of Eru is a 'Glasgow kiss'?"

"Um…it's what you might term a head butt. Not very chivalrous I admit, but it gets the job done." Gary chuckled. "I imagine that my other half doesn't have to go to those lengths."

Tulcas reached over and picked up a wafer of lembas. He turned it over in his hand thoughtfully, as if he was trying to decide whether it was worth eating or not. Gary watched him with a smile on his face. "Are you going to eat that or play with it?" He asked finally.

The Vala put it back on the dish and laughed. "Neither actually. I was just fidgeting, something Nessa lectures me about regularly. Wonderful stuff though. Just one bite will keep a grown man satisfied for a whole day."

Gary raised one eyebrow. "You sound like a television commercial. I haven't seen the Elves offering it to their mortal companions in arms though."

"Indeed not." Tulcas sounded shocked, but there was a twinkle in his blue eyes. "Lembas, otherwise known as Elvish Waybread, is not meant for the Secondborn, it's only made for the Eldar from a recipe handed down from Yavanna who grew the corn in the fields of Aman. The strength of the land is imparted to the corn as it grows and is therefore transferred to the person who ate the bread. She made it to give to the Eldar to keep them going on their long journey from Arda. The Elves rarely share lembas with mortals because it would cause them to become weary of their mortality and long for Aman, where they cannot go."

"How very elitist of them." Gary remarked and picked up a wafer of the bread. He looked up at Tulcas under the thick black fringes of his eyelashes. "Sounds a bit like what the British Army used to call Hard Tack biscuit. Am I allowed to eat it? Will I become weary of mortality?"

Tulcas shook his head. "I doubt it, since no matter whether you are in a mortal body or not, your fea is immortal. In any case, you are not Eldar, but Maia and in your usual incorporeal state you have no need for sustenance. We only eat and indulge such things when we are fleshed and especially for the length of time we are expected to be corporeal here in Arda, our physical bodies suffer from lack of care and nourishment the same as any Elf or mortal man's would. Taste it. I personally prefer real food." He winked at Gary who laughed as the Vala took a large wing of some roast bird and bit into it. He closed his eyes in ecstasy as some of the rich juices dribbled down into his golden beard.

"It looks like Krackabread." Gary remarked as he took a bite out of the waybread. It was a pleasant enough taste, faintly sweet, with a delicate, slightly orange and vanilla under-taste and very creamy textured. A bit like Scottish shortbread, but much lighter. He finished it off and waited to see if it did anything special to him, but felt no different. "I don't feel any different really. It's a bit like a biscuit they have in my time called shortbread only not so solid. Am I supposed to feel more enervated or something?"

Tulcas paused in his tearing apart of the roasted wing and shrugged. "I doubt you will. You are not mortal, nor are you an elf. As I said, you are another sort of being altogether, but it's interesting to see you test yourself like this. Eonwe has never tasted lembas to my knowledge, nor does he particularly indulge in the more…earthly pleasures usually. Personally I feel he is missing out, but the lad keeps to himself a great deal really. Not good for him. Not good at all. I keep trying to persuade him to be less…hmm…dutiful, shall we say, but he seems to think it would injure his dignity as Herald to Lord Manwe Sulimo. Silly boy."

"He didn't seem to consider his 'dignity' as a Herald when he took a tumble with my girlfriend and got her pregnant." Gary muttered darkly.

Tulcas shouted with laughter. "Indeed no. That was rather a turn up for the book. I truly would never have guessed at that level of passion in him. You are not still upset about that are you?"

"A little." Gary sniffed. "I tried so damn hard to do the right thing and still get her attention and the moment my back is turned she jumps some other guy's bones. And then there was Melannen."

Tulcas was arrested in mid-chew. He swallowed the lump of meat almost whole and shot an astonished look at Gary. "Melannen? That young brother of Ingwion's? He also took a tumble with her? Well I'll be damned. And what is jumping bones? It sounds most uncomfortable."

Gary burst out laughing. "Melannen? No, no…I didn't mean he slept with Kim. Of course not, but when we first met him he was very nice to her and she responded to him much better than she did with me. I was far too busy being a bloody officer in the British Army." He sounded disgusted with himself.

Tulcas leant over and placed a placatory hand on his arm. "Stop being so hard on yourself. You were doing what you thought best for both of you. The trouble is that Eonwe is more emotionally vulnerable than he believes himself to be. He has laboured far too long over his disappointment when the Maia maiden Arien, who he had an interest in, took to pursuing Tilion. Personally I think those two deserve each other, all that chasing around the heavens and flirting has to make anyone fizzle-headed. The trouble was that Eonwe was far too flattered at her addle-brained attention, but his duty called him away far too often and she couldn't understand why his attention was not on her all of the time. She decided he was not what she wanted and took up with Tilion. Eonwe was very hurt and he closed off. He would not talk about it, just seethed in private and kicked himself for being a fool. I can still see that in you to some extent, but I think you deal with such things a lot better. Doubtless you have had more experience in your future mortal form with the ladies than he did as a Maia."

"Nice to see I've progressed in something then." Gary said dryly. "Jumping bones is a metaphor for having physical relations with someone by the way."

"Ha!" Tulcas twinkled at him. "I must remember that. It will totally confound Nessa. She will not know what I am babbling about."

Gary chuckled. "Always good to keep them guessing I suppose." He cast a querying look at Tulcas. "So he…I…did have a relationship with someone of my…our own kind then?"

Tulcas shrugged. "If you can call it that. I doubt he got much further than making moon-eyes at her and telling her that she was as beautiful as the starlight." He considered that for a moment. "No, strike that. I don't even think the silly lummox got that far. He probably just sat utterly tongue-tied, stared at her with those terrifying and appealing blue eyes and fiddled with his sword a lot…" He stopped and flapped his hand at Gary who was creased over laughing. "Not that kind of sword for Eru's sake…"

It was too late; they were both doubled up with hysterical laughter which ricocheted around the tent.

A smooth blond, braided head peeped hesitantly around the corner of the tent flap. "My lord?"

Wiping tears of mirth from their eyes, Gary and Tulcas managed to pull themselves together with great difficulty and said in unison. "Yes?"

The young warrior flushed with embarrassment. "Lord Eonwe, the Feanorians, Lords Maedhros and Maglor, are here with their report."

Gary shot an immediate questioning glance at Tulcas who smiled disarmingly at the young warrior. "Give us a moment would you?"

"Yes my Lord, but… there is one more thing. They have a young mortal woman with them and they are asking to see Lord Eonwe urgently."

ooOoo