Disclaimer-I Don't Own Twilight

Please take note of the date…The events in this chapter take place almost a year before Chapter1. This is Dec '08 and that was August '09.

Just Friends?

December 2008

It's been a while since Jasper and I first started hanging out. The day in the park was the only time we spent in public…nowadays we just hangout at my place whenever dad is not around. Almost two weeks have passed since he first entered Newton's Store. Things have never been better for me. However, the fact remains that we are still friends. Just friends. And secret friends at that. It's a bit sad…I know I really like him and that I've wanted him to notice me for so long…but it's just not the same…I know he likes me….and he should damn well know that I like him, too!

For Gods sake! What kind of girl would be okay with the headache that is Jasper Whitlock? Okay, I know he's gorgeous and all…but sometimes, I wonder if his mom didn't drop him on the head as a baby…

He's just so….strange sometimes…and any girl who puts up with his shit has to care for him. We avoid each other as much as possible at school…it wouldn't help if word got around because it would just put a strain on our relation-friendship. NOT relationship. Friendship. Okay? Friendship. Just plain old friendship.

Not to mention my dad…that would be horrible, too.

The only contact Jasper and I have had at school these past weeks was at the cafeteria. We were in each other's way in the lunch line. Jasper was carefully avoiding my stare. However, I knew he noticed me. I knew it because he had a faint smile on his lips as he gazed over my shoulder. That evening he came over as always and told me what I already knew…

"I couldn't look at you. If I did…I know everyone would have found out. I'm a pathetic actor…I would've given it all away…"

Dad has been getting worse and worse…I've started locking up my door whenever he's around and I know that it pisses him off. He confronted me one night.

It was late at night and dad was usually in bed by then. I tiptoed to the kitchen so as not to wake him up.

"Hey…what're you doing here?"

I turned on my heels so fast that I got a crick in my neck.

"OW! Crap…it hurts," I whimpered as I gingerly cupped my throat.

"What hurts, sweetie?"

I took a step back to match my father's step forward. He stopped in his tracks and got a strange look on his face and his eyes started glistening. I wonder if he's high…I wouldn't be surprised…he drinks enough beer to be eligible to enter Alcoholics Anonymous…aren't drugs the next step?

"I'm fine…just need to get some food…"

I trailed off as I rummaged through the fridge for something edible…apple? Beer? Water? Cold lasagna? Bingo. Just a little round in the microwave and I'll be good to run (and hide, in my case). Come to think of it…where's daddy dearest?

I turned and looked at him…he was still near the kitchen table where I had last seen him. How come he wasn't making any untoward advances? I frowned. If he wasn't going to do anything…why was he still standing here?

"Can I help you?"

He shook his head as if he was clearing his head and a determined look crossed his face.

"Why have you been hiding in your room?"

I started. What was I supposed to say? To hide from you, daddy? Nah. I'm just trying to shy away from reality here. Confronting and fighting isn't my style. So I took the easy way out. I lied.

"Isn't that what every teenager wants? Their privacy?"

He frowned at me and I quickly turned and ran up the stairs…muttering a quick goodbye as I went.

The shrill sound of the bell ringing brought me back to reality. Finally! The class went on forever! I was halfway to my locker when I bumped into someone. A very blonde someone. Bleached blonde, if you ask me. Kate McGraw, Fork's High's *IT* girl looked at me with a menacing expression.

"Can you watch where you're going? What is wrong with you?! I was walking right here! Why the hell didn't you move out of my way, freak?!"

I narrowed my eyes at the pathetic little drama queen in front of me and decided to let her have a piece of my mind.

"Excuse me? Can you watch where you're going? What is wrong with you?! I was walking right here, too! Why the hell didn't you move out of my way, bitch?!"

I noticed that the whole hallway had stopped and was paying full attention to the scene unfolding before them.

Jessica, one of her sidekicks raised her over-plucked eyebrows and grabbed Kate's elbows before she could actually reply…all the while muttering about what a stupid slut I was. Wow. I feel like I just stepped in the set of Mean Girls. If I hadn't seen these three, I would've thought all of that was fake. They usually stayed out of my way because we seriously butt heads. I can't stand fake people. And I'm not afraid of standing up to them and letting them know what I think. To be completely honest, I think that is the main reason I feel strange with Jasper. Most of his habits in public are different from when we're alone. And I can't help wonder who he really is inside. You could say that I don't really trust him. I mean…he's a good friend…but I don't know what his intentions are…I still think it's some kind of elaborate prank he's playing.

I huffed and walked away briskly, hoping the teacher for my next class called in sick.

Alas. No such luck. Mr. Banner was walking around the class, passing around papers.

Shit. The test. I forgot! I completely forgot! Damn Jasper for staying over so late last night! I looked around the class, wondering if I could persuade anyone to help me cheat. My eyes locked onto Angela Webber. She was sitting all alone…maybe she could help me out…

I quickly walked towards her, "Is this seat taken?"

She looked up at me with a small smile, "Nope. Have a seat."

I dropped my bag on the floor and turned to her.

"So…how well are you prepared for today's test?"

***

I checked the time on my cell phone and bit my lip. He was never late. And now it was almost five…more than an hour later than the usual time he came to my house. I sighed and peeped out of the window for the millionth time in the past hour. I don't know what happened…he should be here by now...

Another look at the time and I stuck up my chin defiantly. People do run late. They can't be on time every single day…that's perfectly normal. However, looking out of the window the entire time, waiting for them to come is not normal. I'm sure he'd have a completely legitimate reason for not being on time…not that we had ever made anything official. Not that we had actually said that we were going to meet everyday at my house by 4 pm. I frowned as I realized that we had just been swinging it till now. He could even not come over and that would be perfectly fine. Technically.

I jumped off the couch, angrily stuffing my cell phone in my back pocket as I entered the kitchen. I could probably make something…

Hmm…Chocolate cake…my very own chocolate cake recipe…it'd take a while to make…but it would take my mind off Jasper and his idiotic, petty mind games. I'm not sure who exactly he thinks he is…blowing me off like this. And if he says that we didn't exactly make any plans to meet today…then it is his own fucking fault. To just leave me hanging out here, without confirming anything. Bastard. See, things like this make me wonder who Jasper Whitlock is inside. Is it the sweet, rock-loving guy he is with me? Or the cocky, arrogant, two-faced jock in school?

I slowly sifted the dry mixture of the cake, trying to convince myself that looking at the time wouldn't do shit for me. The beep of the microwave alerted me to that the butter was done and I wiped the flour off my hands on my apron. As I measured the brown sugar, I thought back to the many times I had burned with jealousy due to Jasper.

I seriously doubt that Jasper knew I saw him, because he never mentioned any other friends he had to hang out with and because he spends his whole day with me…he wouldn't have been able to get any time to go on dates. I could've flattered myself that he spends all his time here because he was interested in me…but seeing him with all those girls cured me of any such idiocy. This was what led to even more confusion. If he weren't interested in me…why would he waste all his time here? And so the elaborate-prank thoughts resurface.

I was already late for my class so I thought it would be best if I took a shortcut. I was running down the hall when I heard light moans from behind the gym…where I was heading. I slowed down and wished I could just pass by without the sexually active couple knowing I was even there. Well. I got my wish. Jasper and his skank didn't even look up as I stared at them like a fish out of water. If anything, their moans just seemed to increase in volume as they groped and necked each other. I bit my lip and turned around, shaking my head. To hell with being late for class. I had a date back home with a carton of ice cream.

If that were the only time something like this happened…I would've tried to forget the whole incident. But no, the day after that, I heard Lauren and Jessica gossiping and Jasper's name caught my attention.

"Oh My God, Jess! Jasper was amazing! He came over to my house late last night and sneaked me out. And his car. God, His car is SO sexy! Well, we christened it! It was so hot…"

"Well…you didn't do it on his bed. Have you seen his room?! It has that whole mirror ceiling thingy. Damn…that was hot!"

Their high-pitched giggles made me cover my ears and stalk off bitterly.

I shook my head violently as I cracked open the fifth egg. Over thinking this isn't worth it. If he wants to come…he'll come. Besides, we're just friends. And I'll be damned if we become anything more. I've seen the way he treats women. The whole school is littered with ex-girlfriends of his. The longest time he spent in a relationship was a month. And that's not what I want. I want forever. I want a man who can give me forever. Who'll want to give me forever. And having two months (If I'm lucky, that is) is not good enough me. Not enough for the heartbreak that is sure to follow.

I'm not big on commitment. But I know that when I do commit, it's going to last. Even if it'd only be one-sided…because I'm just not the type of person who can be with a different man every other day.

And Jasper... Well. Jasper can't give me forever.

***

I was mixing the butter mixture and the dry mixture when I heard the distinctive knock on the door. I rolled my eyes and scoffed bitterly as finished up my batter. He'd made me wait about two hours. He could do a few minutes outside. As the knocking grew in volume I shouted, "I'm coming! Hold your fucking horses!"

When my shout didn't help the situation and the knocking kept me from concentrating on measuring out a cup of boiling water, I gave up with a huff and stormed towards the door.

To no one's surprise, Jasper stood there, smiling timidly.

"Jeez! You keep that up and you'll break the damn door!"

He looked up at me through his lashes and I reminded myself that taking out my anger on him wouldn't help any because technically, the bastard didn't do anything wrong.

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah, Whatever. Don't do it again. Charlie will have you by the throat."

He nodded and quietly followed me to the kitchen.

I turned my back to him as drained away the water in the cup and poured more from the scalding hot pot. I heard Jasper awkwardly clear his throat, "So…how are you?"

"Fucking Peachy."

I saw him rubbing the back of his hand on his neck through my peripheral vision.

"Um…good. How was school…?"

I turned around with a sneer on my face.

"Fucking perfect. Yours?"

"Uh…good…it was…good…"

I made a show of rolling my eyes at him exasperatedly and stalked off to get the baking dish.

"You'll have to be quick with your shit, Jasper. I need you out of here in a few minutes. What did you want again?"

"Just…wanted to see you."

"Great. You've seen me, now you can get your bony ass out of here before my father gets here and does it for you."

"We…still have some time…can't we…talk?"

"Sure! Talk! Talking is good! Let's fucking talk, Whitlock."

"Um…what are you making?"

"Chocolate cake."

"Oh, My favorite!"

I rolled my eyes and sneered at him, "Who doesn't like chocolate cake, Jasper?"

"Um…my mother hates all kinds of cakes."

Your mother hates all kinds of everything. Including you, Whitlock. When he realized that I wasn't going to reply he said something I had not expected. At all.

"Will you be my girlfriend?"

I stared at him incredulously.

"WHAT?!"

I gaped at Jasper with my jaw hanging open when I heard Charlie's car outside. Fuck. Perfect timing.

***