There's another bomb in the city. She doesn't know how she keeps getting handed these cases. So Castle was able to single-handedly defuse a bomb once, that doesn't make them bomb experts. It doesn't even make Castle NYPD.
She watches him now, pacing back and forth in front of the murder board spinning theory about how they should be looking at the dead bodies for clues. She catches herself staring at the skin of his chest left exposed by the open button of his shirt. It was stupid to decide to start this relationship when she wasn't in the proper condition to…reap its full benefits. But maybe if she was on top –
"Beckett, are you even listening to me?" Castle asks, knocking her out of her thoughts.
"Yeah, look to the dead bodies for evidence. I'm sure Lanie is already on it. That's sort of her job."
Esposito nudges Ryan and laughs before they walk off to do whatever part of that conversation she missed.
"You okay?" Castle asks, once they're out of earshot.
"Button up the rest of your shirt. It's distracting," she hisses.
"I never button the top button. It feels like my shirt is choking me when I do."
She glares at him, pretending to shuffle through paperwork on her desk.
"And since when is it," he starts, "oh. Oh I see. You know, Beckett, there are plenty of positions that don't involve putting pressure on your arm."
She draws her tongue out to bite her lower lip. His face is inches away from hers and wow this is not good. They shouldn't be talking about this here; they really shouldn't –
"Detective Beckett," Gates calls.
She spins, nearly hitting Castle in the face with her sling. "Yes, Sir?"
Gates holds up a slip of paper. "New lead for you to track down."
As she moves to take the paper from her boss, she glares at Castle again, wishing she could wipe that smug look off his face.
She has another suspect in interrogation, fearing that her broken arm makes her look less intimidating. At least the scratches on her face have healed, for the most part. Currently the guy is trying to give her some bullshit about how he doesn't remember anything because he experienced trauma. She's doesn't buy it, refuses to, so she keeps pushing. He keeps giving her the same excuse.
She can't take it anymore; she just knows that he's lying. Her right hand balls into a fist and she gets in his face. "You don't get to use that excuse. I was shot in the chest and I remember every second."
The suspect still refuses to give anything up. Frustrated, Beckett storms out of the interrogation room and finds Castle watching from the other side of the mirror.
"Hey," she greets him, the softness returning to her tone as she scrubs her right hand through her hair.
"You realize that Ryan and Esposito know, don't you?"
Panic flashes across her face. "That we're dating?"
"No, that I confessed my love for you when you got shot."
Confusion replaces the panic. "Okay?"
"I mean you just said in there that you remember every second of it. What if one of them had been watching?"
"Castle, that doesn't really give anything away other than the fact that I've been lying to you, which you already know about."
"Yeah, but I'd have to act like I was hearing it for the first time. Pretend like we haven't talked about it."
She shakes her head. "Our personal lives are none of their business. We don't know everything that goes on between Esposito and Lanie."
Beckett looks around before placing her hand on his shoulder. "Stop worrying, Castle. No one's going to find out."
"It'd be easier if they did, you know. Then I could kiss you anytime I want to."
She rolls her eyes and smiles. "Look, the minute Gates finds out, your time as an NYPD consultant is over. And that leaves me with no partner and you at home alone, being bored all day. This way just works better for everyone right now."
He nods, patting her hand on his shoulder until she takes it off.
"Now, are you still coming over for dinner later?" she asks.
"Depends on what time they let you go home."
She groans looking back through the mirror at their suspect who isn't talking.
"Might have to make it breakfast," she grumbles as she heads back to the interrogation room.
He makes it over for dinner, a day later than they had originally anticipated. The case had gone long, but they managed to get the guy responsible in custody. Yet another bombing case done and over with.
Beckett finishes loading the dishes into the dishwasher before moving to join Castle in her living room. She sits down on her couch with a heavy sigh, draping her legs over his lap. Castle runs a hand up her leg as she digs her bare feet into the pillow at his side.
"Do you have any regrets, Beckett?" he asks, lazily tracing shapes against her knee.
"Why do you ask?"
"It's just this case. All those people who died in that bomb with so much life left to live. I guess you could argue all of our cases are like that. But it just got me thinking, if you knew you were going to die tomorrow, what would you do, what would you regret?"
"They didn't know they were going to die," she tries to argue.
"Humor me."
Beckett hums, pulling her left arm tighter against her body. "I should have told you the truth in the hospital after I was shot. If I was going to die, I'd want more time with you."
"You wouldn't want more time with me if you weren't going to die?" Castle asks, faking being hurt.
"You know what I mean," she rolls her eyes.
His hand trails past her knee, now skimming her lower thigh.
"What about you, Castle? What do you regret?"
"In regards to you?"
His hand moves up higher on her thigh as her hips shift involuntarily closer to his.
"I wish that I had told you how I felt before you got shot. I had a lot of opportunities. I almost did when we were in isolation for potential radiation poisoning and you were bitching about Josh leaving you for Africa. I almost did later that case when we were stuck in that freezer together. I wanted to after we kissed."
"Why didn't you?"
Castle shrugs. "You were with Josh. I didn't really know how you felt about the guy. Maybe you loved him."
"I didn't."
"Yeah I know that now. Which is why I wish I would have said something sooner."
Beckett shifts her weight again, this time moving to straddle his hips. Castle's hands skim up the curve of her ass before settling on her lower back.
"We're together now. That's what matters," she says.
He nods and reaches up to kiss her. She braces herself with her right arm against the back of the couch as their kiss deepens and she starts rocking her hips into his. He trails his lips around the curve of her jaw and down her neck.
"This won't hurt your arm will it?" Castle asks, fumbling with the button on her pants.
"Not if I stay on top."
"Is that how you like it, Beckett?" he asks, nipping at her ear. "To be in control?"
She starts unbuttoning his shirt, running her right hand over the hard planes of his chest. "Not always."
"Interesting," he hums against her skin. "Things to explore once your arm is healed."
Beckett laughs, her right hand curling at the tuft of hair at the nape of his neck. "Oh Castle, if you only knew."
He visibly swallows at that and dips his hands below the waistband of her pants. "I look forward to it."
"As do I," she says, bending to kiss him again. "As do I."
She can't stop the grin from forming when she sees him arrive at their crime scene the next morning. He hands her her coffee, giving her a knowing glance, before asking about the murder. Ryan explains while she takes a sip from her cup, letting the warm liquid spread through her. Beckett feels an elbow dig into her side and turns to see Lanie smirking at her.
"What?" Beckett asks, wiping at her mouth. "Do I have something on my face?"
"What's gotten into you?" Lanie asks instead, ignoring her question. "You look happier than usual. Or should I ask who's gotten into you?"
Beckett nearly chokes on her coffee. "What? Nothing. No one."
She shakes her head as Lanie raises an eyebrow at her.
"Right, okay," Lanie nods, moving back over to the body. "I won't know for sure until I get him back to the lab, but it looks like our killer tried to kill him by strangulation, but couldn't get the job done that way so he shot him."
"That escalated, quickly," Castle mutters, cringing at the thought.
"Did you find any ID on him?" Beckett asks.
"Just a credit card with a woman's name on it," Lanie responds, handing her the bag of evidence. "Hopefully if you track her down, she'll have some answers for you."
She thanks her and starts to walk back to Esposito's cruiser. Castle sidles up next to her.
"You'll have to ride with Ryan," she tells him. "Unless you want to sit in the back."
"Does the back involve you putting me in handcuffs?" he asks, wiggling his eyebrows.
Beckett smacks him in the arm, looking over her shoulder at the others. "Watch it, we're at work. Lanie already thinks I look happier than usual."
"Aw did I bring that out in you?"
"You brought something out in me," she grumbles as the boys head over their way. "Let's go back to the precinct and run the name on this card."
"Do you want Esposito and me to go question her once we find her?" Ryan asks.
"Yeah go ahead," she tells him. "Castle and I will wait to hear back from Lanie."
Castle pulls her aside before they part ways to head back to the precinct.
"You think Lanie's suspicious and yet you want us to go talk to her alone together?" he asks.
"Just act normal. You can do that, can't you?"
He throws her a look and then wanders off after Ryan. This is going to be an interesting couple of months. She figures their big secret can't be kept much longer than that.