A/N: This chapter is going to be told from 3 different points of view and it will go back and forth between several days.
As Dr. Roz Washington stared at the mutinous faces of the two people in front of her she genuinely didn't know how she was going to help them. The tension between them was an palpable thing, something she could almost swear she could see radiating between them in waves. There was anger there but most of all there was hurt—deep hurt. They had been sitting in her office now for ten minutes and with the exception of a few stilted greetings there had been absolute silence from both of them. The stubborn set of their jawlines showed that neither one of them had any intention of being their first one to spill their guts, but Roz knew that she couldn't be a help to either one of them if they didn't talk. And she had a sneaking suspicion that not communicating is what brought them to her in the first place.
"So, what brings you two to my office?"
Silence.
"Nothing? So everything is fine, right?"
Silence.
"You know you two, I get paid 150 bucks an hour so if you just want to sit here staring at opposite sides of the wall, that's fine with me, either way I'm still sending out my bill."
Silence.
"Fine, let's just sit here then and in a few months when that baby comes out you can explain to him or her why Mommy and Daddy are too emotionally screwed up to raise them properly."
With that statement two sets of eyes snapped to her accusingly but still neither one of them said a word.
"Look, the two of you clearly need help and you both have acknowledged that fact otherwise you wouldn't be here. However, I can't help you if you won't speak. You may be mad at each other, hell, you may even hate each other but you will never move from this stagnant spot if you don't communicate. Talk!"
"I haven't seen him in over three weeks," Roz heard a low voice say.
"Three weeks? Is there any reason for that?"
Silence.
Roz swallowed her annoyance at the blonde man who stared resolutely out the large window at his right. The only sign of emotion coming from him was the continuous ticking in his jaw and the clenched fists that were lying tensely on his thighs.
"How did that make you feel?" Roz asked to the only participant she currently had.
"Alone."
At the single word Roz watched as the blonde man slowly closed his eyes and clenched them shut tightly. He looked as if he wanted to say something—anything but still…nothing.
"Now that he's back per say, what do you feel?"
"I still feel alone. He's not 'back' he's just here because my mother begged him to come. He isn't doing this for me, he's doing it for her."
"That's not true," the man finally barked.
"Then why are you here?" Roz asked. "Sam…why are you here?"
Silence.
Roz blew out an annoyed breath before saying, "This isn't working, neither one of you is in the place to bare your soul in front of the other yet so we are never going to get anywhere because both of you refuse to talk. So, the couple's counseling is being put on hold until after I spend some one on one time with each of you. So, Mercedes since you seem a little bit more willing to talk I'll speak with you first and Sam can come in some other time. Does that work for the both of you?"
"Yes," Mercedes answered while Sam muttered, "it's fine."
"Good. Since today's session is a wash how about we try this again on Wednesday with Mercedes and Friday with Sam. Depending on how those sessions go I might call the both of you back in next Monday, okay?"
"Okay." They both muttered together.
"Great, sounds like a plan."
WEDNESDAY
Mercedes spun a bracelet around her wrist as she waited impatiently for Dr. Roz to stop writing incessantly in her tablet. She hadn't even said a word yet but her therapist was writing what appeared to be a novel as if she had spilled every sordid detail from her whole 26 years. After what seemed like an eternity Dr. Roz finally stopped scribbling and focused her steely brown eyes on Mercedes.
"So, why are you here?"
Mercedes internally rolled her eyes at the stale, general question and gave the canned response that she already had prepared.
"I'm here because I recognize that I have issues that I cannot solve on my own. I want to be a better, more well-rounded person and in order to do that I must find out the root of my deep-seated issues."
Dr. Roz gave Mercedes a small, cold smile before uttering one word.
"Bullshit."
"Excuse me?"
"You're full of shit."
"You can't say that to me!"
"Actually I can, unless of course you're paying me to lie to you." Roz raised one eyebrow and regarded Mercedes coolly. "If you came here to bullshit me then you're wasting my time and yours. If you want help then fine, I'll do my best but if you came in here to please somebody else or to get them off of your back then you need to get out of my office, right now. I can't help you if you won't try and help yourself and I refuse to waste my time on you when I could be using it to help someone who really wants it instead. So again I ask, why are you here?"
Briefly, Mercedes considered not saying a word. There was a stubborn part of her that wanted so much to just walk out of the door but she knew that Dr. Roz was right. She was there for a reason and she didn't want to walk out of that door knowing that she still had all of those issues that she had walked in with.
"I don't trust him."
"Sam?"
Mercedes nodded, "It always comes back to this. I don't trust that he'll stick around and I'm terrified about having a baby with someone that I'm not 100% sure will be there…"
FRIDAY
Sam stared out the window and he could feel Dr. Roz's intense gaze boring into him. He tried to pretend that the generic gray building across the way was interesting enough to be holding his attention the way it was.
"So Sam, why are you here?"
Why was he here? He thought as he continued to look out the window. He didn't believe in the therapy, he never did. He didn't think that talking extensively about his feelings or whatever fucked issues he had was going to make them all better. He could pinpoint every screwed up situation in his life that led to him being here. The constant pressure from his dad to follow in his footsteps. The never ending animosity directed towards him from his brother. His mother's long sickness that wrecked and ravaged her body before finally killing her. His tumultuous relationship with Quinn. Mercedes leaving him…
He knew why he was fucked up, talking about it wasn't going to change anything.
"Sam?"
"I don't know," Sam answered finally turning to face her. "I have no fucking idea."
"Is it for her?"
"Which her?"
Roz chuckled lightly, "both of them."
Sam wanted to say no, that he was only doing it for his daughter but he knew that would be a lie. Mercedes was just as deeply ingrained in his heart as their unborn daughter was.
"Why did you leave three weeks ago?"
"Aren't you supposed to lead into that? Ask me about my bad childhood or my shitty relationships or something like that?"
"We'll get to all of that…eventually. Right now I want to know what was going through your mind when you left Mercedes three weeks ago."
"What did she say?"
"I can't tell you that, doctor/patient confidentiality. Just like I can't tell her any of the stuff you tell me."
"I don't know." Sam said finally after a long pause.
"You don't know? So you have no idea what was going through your mind that night?"
Sam stared at her stubbornly and she sighed. "Look Sam, regardless to what you seem to think, I am trying to help you and I think you want that help but you're too stubborn to admit it. You want to know why I'm not going waste our time recounting your entire childhood? Because you left for a reason three weeks ago and whatever that reason is if we get over that hump the rest will come. So why did you leave?
Sam looked at Dr. Roz for a long minute before finally pulling something from inside his pocket and slamming it on the coffee table in between them.
"Ah…I see." Roz said as she stared at the tiny box.
"I don't trust her," Sam said finally, "I want…everything with her but she doesn't want the same."
"How do you know?"
"That's just it, I don't know but I can't trust what she says over what she's shown. She says she loves me but the way she acts…
"Why did you leave three weeks ago Sam? What was the straw that finally broke the camel's back for you?"
WEDNESDAY
"I know I already asked you this in our other session but I'm asking it again now that Sam isn't here. How did you feel when he left?" Roz asked with her pen and pad ready in her lap.
"I told you before, I felt alone."
"And?"
"And…at first I was shocked but I was sure he was coming back. I figured seeing the baby for the first time was a bit overwhelming for him so he just needed to get some air or something but then he never came back."
"How long before you heard from him?"
"The next morning—well, he contacted me earlier than that but I had fallen asleep. He sent me a text saying that he was going to be staying at his condo for awhile a few hours after he left. That was the last thing I heard from him before he sent me another text this past Sunday telling me to meet him here. I wasn't going to come but then I got a call from my mother immediately after begging me to 'do it for the baby'." Mercedes rolled her eyes as she used two fingers to make air quotes.
"Does that upset you? Your mother inserting herself in this situation?"
"What—no…no, of course not. She means well, and she wants what's best for the baby and she has this idea that Sam and I could have this wonderful life together."
"You don't think so?"
"Not anymore. I did, but after everything…no, I don't think that anymore."
"Everything?"
Mercedes debated not saying anything but she knew it wouldn't be right to place all the blame on Sam's shoulders.
"It's a long story…"
"We've got time. Why don't you start from the beginning?'
"Well, my friend Emma was having a baby and she was leaving her job…"
FRIDAY
"Everything with Mercedes is so intense. We work hard, we play hard, we laugh hard, we love hard, we hate hard. When we were together, like really together and things between us were good I was happier than I've ever been in my life. But when things between us got bad…"
"They were really bad."
"It was excruciating. Waking up without her, being without her…it hurts" Sam rubbed his hand over his chest as if there was a physical ache there.
"And yet you chose to be without her." Dr. Roz reminded him gently.
"Not the first time," Sam answered harshly, "She left me first, did she tell you about that? She left me behind. I didn't choose that."
"How did that make you feel?"
"Angry…betrayed. She said she loved me but the second something happened she turned her back on me. She didn't let me explain, she didn't give me a chance to defend myself—she just left."
"So you wanted to get her back then, yes? You wanted her to feel all that anger and hurt she felt so you decided to pay her back." Dr. Roz said matter-of-factly.
"What? No! Where in the hell did you get that from?" Sam asked angrily. "I was mad at her yes, but I would never purposely do something like that to her. I wouldn't wish that kind of pain on my worst enemy, much less on the woman I lo—"
"On the woman you what?"
"The woman I love. I still love her, there's no question about that but there has been too much…I just can't see how we can make it."
Roz tilted her heads towards the little light blue box on the table between them.
"Why did you leave that night Sam?"
"She told me she wanted more…"
WEDNESDAY
"…And then he bought us a house—"
"How did that make you feel?" Dr. Roz interrupted, "he came to Miami and threatened you to come back, practically snatched you out of the life you created down there and then unceremoniously plopped you in a house as if you were a kept woman."
"I…I…"Mercedes stuttered as she blinked rapidly in confusion after being completely blindsided.
"He didn't take in consideration your feelings and he completely strong-armed you into accepting a house that you didn't want."
"Well, that isn't exactly true—"
"He's nothing but an insensitive, overbearing, bully who thinks he can—"
"DON'T TALK ABOUT HIM LIKE THAT!" Mercedes screamed, "You don't know a damn thing about him so don't you dare talk about him like that."
Dr. Roz smiled smugly as she sat back in her seat. "Forgive me Mercedes, I was just following your lead. If you don't believe all those things are true then why do you present it that way? You have just spent the last half hour bitching about all the things Sam did to you but when I practically parrot back what you're saying you can't stand it. Why is that?"
"Why are you playing games?"
"Why are you refusing to answer my question?"
"Which one?" Mercedes asked angrily, "Which vague overly-general question would you like me to answer?"
"Why did you leave? And before you start in with the Daddy thing, save it. It may have been part of the issue but it wasn't the root of the issue. You had a problem with Sam that had nothing to do with your father…what is it?"
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Cut the bullshit Mercedes, the daddy story may have worked on everyone else but it's not going to work with me. There was something else there, what was it?"
Mercedes could feel it—the need to escape. The unnamed fear was curling its icy tendrils around her neck and she just wanted to run. She wanted to get away from these feelings, she wanted to get away from Dr. Roz's incessant questions, she just wanted to get away.
Mercedes hands tightened on her purse beside her as she prepared to make a quick getaway but her hands immediately loosened when she saw Roz's eyes drift down to where they lay on her purse.
"Going somewhere?" Dr. Roz asked sarcastically, "you're free to leave Mercedes, nobody will stop you and this time no one will be running after you either. You're a pro at running away from your problems so why should now be any different?"
Mercedes felt tears pool in her eyes at Dr. Roz's harsh but true words. She was a pro at running away and somewhere along the line it had become her go-to response for pretty much everything. Things got too bad—she ran. Things were too good—she ran. Things look like they had a potential to go either way—she ran. She thought of all the relationships she missed out on and all the ones she sabotaged right before they went anywhere serious. Despite what Dr. Roz said she knew a lot of her issues with other men had a lot to do with her father but at the same time she knew that it was something else with Sam. Something that scared the hell out of her—scared her more than anything else.
"I wanted more." She whispered.
"What was that?" Roz asked her, "What did you say Mercedes?"
"I said," Mercedes said firmly looking Dr. Roz in the eye, "I wanted more. You asked me why I left and the answer is I wanted more. I wanted more and I thought he wanted nothing so I left before he could break my heart…"
FRIDAY
"She wanted more? Why is that a bad thing?" Dr. Roz asked.
"It's not…I just…" Sam tugged on his blonde hair in frustration, "I'm not explaining this right."
"Take your time."
"After the doctor's appointment we went back to the house and things got a little…heated."
"You two were about to have sex?"
"Uh…yes," Sam shifted uncomfortably in his seat, "things were escalating pretty quickly and she said that she wanted more."
"Well, I think it's safe to assume that she meant she wanted more from you physically, correct?"
"Yes."
"Well, then why did you leave? Why not just succumb or if sex isn't what you wanted then why not just cool things off and back away? Why take such drastic measures by leaving and staying gone for weeks?"
"Because she said she wanted more."
"Yes, but she meant—"
"I know what she meant!" Sam yelled, "I knew exactly what she meant when she said it but hearing it…"
"What?"
"I bought that," he gestured to the box on the table, "I bought that because I wanted more, because I wanted everything with her for the rest of my life. I wanted to marry her and she left me. She took off without a look back because she wanted nothing to do with me."
"Sam, I don't think it's that cut and dry."
"It probably isn't but that is what I felt and that is why I left. It was a complete overreaction but just hearing her say that she wanted more…I just, I don't know, I couldn't handle it."
"Why is that?"
"Because…why then? I had wanted that from her for months and the only time she could tell me that was when she wanted sex."
"Is that really a fair comparison? Can you really take something she said in the heat of the moment and use it against her?"
"You asked me how I felt." Sam answered defensively, "I never said it was rational or right but it is the way I felt. "
"Fine, fair enough. You were upset in the moment and you needed a second to breathe but why didn't you go back once you had some time away from her?"
"Have you ever been in love—like, really in love?"
"Not yet, no."
"It consumes you…I never realized how much until I was actually in real love. I thought I loved my ex-fiancé but I think I just clung to this idea of a perfect wife who could be a perfect mother because I wanted that family to replace the one I had lost. I didn't love her, I loved the idea of her. When that fell apart I was bitter—really bitter, and I think I confused that with a broken heart. I mean it hurt so that must've been what it was, right? That's what I kept telling myself anyway. When I finally healed from that debacle I foolishly thought I was strong because I had bounced back from a broken heart…I had no idea."
"No idea about what?"
"What a broken heart truly felt like…Mercedes showed me that." He answered grimly.
"What did it feel like to you?"
"Like someone punched me in the chest and ripped my heart out and left a gaping wound that ached all the time. It felt like I had everything one day and nothing the next and it was devastating. I didn't just lose the woman I loved, I lost my baby as well—I had lost my family all over again."
"Mmmm-hmmmm…." Dr. Roz murmured non-commitally.
"What does that mean?" Sam snapped, "I pour out my heart to you and all you can is mmmm-hmmm?"
Dr. Roz looked at him serenely before arching one perfect eyebrow and asking, "Why did you leave that night?"
"I already told you—"
"Tell me again. Why did you leave that night?"
"I left because…" He trailed off.
"Because?"
"I had it all. The woman of my dreams carrying my child, the house that she agreed to share with me, she was saying all the things I wanted to hear…"
"Then why did you leave? You had everything you wanted—why leave?"
"Because it was wrong."
"Why was it wrong?"
"Because it wasn't real—no, that's not the right word…it wasn't stable."
"Stable?"
"Yeah, it was like a soap bubble. It was perfect in that moment but at any time in any way it could be broken."
"Why do you believe that? If Mercedes was finally on the same page as you and she knew the whole truth what makes you think it wouldn't be stable any longer?"
"Because I don't trust what we have anymore. I know how I feel but I'm not sure about how she feels. Is she in love with me or does she just love me because of the baby? Does she really want to start a life with me or is she just saying that because she doesn't have anywhere else to go? Would she say yes if I asked her to marry me one day?"
"Why didn't you just ask her these questions?"
"Because I don't think my heart could take her answers."
"Ah, I see…"
WEDNESDAY
"I'm confused Mercedes, you wanted more but you still left? Wouldn't it have made more sense to stick around and fight for what you wanted instead of running away?"
"Rationally? Yes. But I was beyond rational at that point. I let my guard down with him and the second I did I was pummeled. Obviously hindsight is 20/20 and I know all the things I thought to be true were false but the pain was real. The idea that I was finally getting to a place were I was imagining forever with someone only to have it all snatched away was heartbreaking."
"So I can understand you leaving, but I don't understand you staying away."
"Well that is where my 'daddy issues' kick in at. I can honestly say that when I went to Miami my main thought was all about getting as far away from that painful situation as I could. I knew how if felt to be unwanted and I didn't want to feel that again and I didn't want my baby to feel it ever."
"Fair enough. So cutting out Sam makes sense, but what about your mother and your best friend."
Mercedes laughed humorlessly, "Even the most irrational have their moments of clarity. In the back of my mind there was this constant niggling doubt that I was wrong, that I was overreacting but I never paid attention to it, my stubbornness wouldn't let me. I wanted to feel justified in my actions so I ignored anything and anyone that would challenge them. I felt hurt, and angry, and betrayed and I wanted to keep feeling that way because feeling that way is what fueled me. It was all I had." Mercedes' voice broke as tears filled her eyes, "I got played and I fell for it. I turned my back on everyone I loved because I wasn't strong enough to deal with the possibility that the man I loved didn't truly love me back."
"Do you believe he loves you now?"
"I did, but then he left and…I don't know anymore." She answered sadly, "When we were in the doctor's office together I felt so happy. For the first time since I found out about this pregnancy I felt like a family…like I had created something with someone that I loved. Before I always thought of it as 'my baby' but at that doctor's office I finally felt as it were our baby."
"How did that make you feel?"
"So happy and so in love and…it was perfect, it was everything I could have wanted." Mercedes answered as tears slipped down her cheeks.
Dr. Roz plucked a few tissues from the small table beside her and handed them to Mercedes before asking, "what did you feel when he left?"
"I already answered this."
"Answer it again, please. What did you feel?"
"Like I had lost my family…like I had lost everything."
"Why don't you tell him that?"
"Because I don't know what we have anymore. I don't know if what we have is enough. I don't know if he loves me anymore."
"Why don't you just ask?"
"Because I don't know what his answer will be and it scares the hell out of me."
"Ah, I see…"
MONDAY
Roz stared at the two people in front of her and she couldn't help but notice a change. The tension was still there but it had decreased immensely. They were sitting closer together—still not touching, but still closer than they were before. They seemed lighter even though there continued to be a heaviness in the air between them. They were both alert, they were both paying attention, they were both in the moment.
They were ready. They were both ready to start fixing this mess that they had both created.
"So how about we cut to the chase, shall we? What brings you two to my office?"
Silence.
Roz watched her two patients closely and she observed how they were both actively fighting to not look at each other. They both wanted to speak but neither one of them wanted to break the silence so Roz decided to help them out.
"Why don't you go first Sam?"
Sam's green eyes widened slowly but he cleared his throat and prepared to speak. Roz chose him first because out of the both of them he was more willing to talk and she truly believed that once he started to open up Mercedes would quickly follow suit.
"I'm here because I love her." He said simply.
Roz watched as Mercedes big brown doe eyes filled with tears and she turned her head away so that nobody would see.
"I'm here because I miss her. I'm here because I don't want to miss watching my daughter grow inside of her. I'm here because I want a family—this family. I'm here because I can't live without her."
Roz found herself blinking back her own tears at his solemn words and she turned her attention to Mercedes who had given up all pretense of hiding and was looking at Sam will tears running down her face.
"Mercedes, what about you?"
"I'm here because I love him too," she began with tears thick in her voice, "I'm here because I'm sick of being afraid of things I can't control. I'm here because I'm terrified of messing this up again. I'm here because I don't want to do anything that will keep my daughter from having the family she deserves."
"Good, very good." Roz nodded and smiled and fought the urge to clap excitedly when she saw Sam reach across the couch and grab Mercedes' hand in his. These two needed work—so much work, both together and apart but for right now her work was done.
"Alright then, the two of you are free to go."
"What?"
"Excuse me?"
"The session is done, you can go home now."
"How is the session done, we've been here for five minutes?" Sam asked in confusion.
Roz smiled, "Trust me the therapy is nowhere near done for either one of you but for right now you need each other more than you need to talk to me."
"Wha—I don't understand." Mercedes said as she looked back and forth between Sam and Dr. Roz, "how can we be done? You finally got us to talk and now you're sending us home."
"I'm sending you home to talk—to each other. Doctor's orders. Your collective issues aren't the problem, but your lack of communication is. Just think about all of the things that could have been avoided if the two of you just talked to each other. No assumptions, no fears—just talk. Quit worrying about getting hurt and what the other person might do. Trust me on this, a good talk between the two of you will clear a lot of things up."
"And then what? One good talk and we're magically cured?" Sam asked.
"Heh, not even close. You'll never be 'cured', we as people grow and change too much to tie up our lives in little pretty boxes. That is why communication is key, people change, ideals change, feelings change…as long as you keep an open mind and communicate then you can change with it—together."
Roz watched as Mercedes intertwined her fingers with Sam's and asked him quietly, "come home…please?"
Sam smiled down at her before whispering back, "there's no where else I'd rather be."
Minutes later after thank yous were exchanged and schedules for follow-up sessions were made Roz sat in her high backed leather chair behind her desk and gave herself a well-deserved pat on the back. Sam and Mercedes were a long way from being 'fixed' but Roz was convinced that she had given them such a huge shove in the right direction that they had no choice but to keep going down that path.
She couldn't help but laugh to herself as she thought back to the excited way that Sam and Mercedes had left her office. She had no doubt that they would try her suggestion of talking but she wasn't going to fool herself into thinking that was going to last for a very long time. She gave them thirty minutes to an hour before their 'at home therapy' became decidedly sexual.
TUESDAY MORNING
"Mmmmmmmm…." Mercedes moaned into Sam's neck causing him to laugh at the ticklish vibrations.
"Good morning, sweetheart," He said in a throaty voice thick from sleep.
"Morning." Came the muffled reply from his neck.
"Did you have a good night, baby?"
"You were there…what do you think?"
"It was good, really good…"
6 HOURS EARLIER
"So where do you want to start?" Sam asked Mercedes. They were sitting on the couch in the living room on opposite sides facing each other.
Mercedes shrugged and tugged on her t-shirt, pulling it away from her bump. "I don't know what do you think?"
"I'm sorry," Mercedes looked up in surprise at Sam's words, "I shouldn't have left the way I did. I had a whole lot going on in my head and instead of handling it, I took off."
"Yeah…I know the feeling," she lamely joked. "Why did you leave?"
"I left because you told me you wanted more."
Mercedes looked at him with obvious confusion all over her face, "I was talking about I wanted more…well, you know. We had been making out forever and I needed to feel you—all of you and…wait, you didn't want to make love to me?" She asked in a hurt tone.
"Mercedes," Sam slid across the couch until he was right across from her and he grabbed her face in his hands, "you know that isn't true. If I could feel your body around me every second of every day I promise you I would, don't ever doubt that. You are the most beautiful thing in the world to me how could I now want to make love to you?"
"Um…wow," Mercedes said as she swallowed hard, "well, if that wasn't it then I don't understand what you meant."
"It's a long story but I…."Sam racked his brain trying to figure out how to tell her how he felt without spilling that he planned to propose to her one day, "Let's just say that hearing you say that was something I wanted to hear from you before everything went down and when you did finally say it, it was tainted by everything that came before it."
Mercedes hung her head in regret but Sam quickly put his fingers under her chin and lifted her head back up, "No, don't do that. We both did and said things we should be ashamed of but we're going to do better from now on, right?"
"Right."
"I love you Mercedes and I love our baby and I want us to be a family."
"I want that too."
"Really? Even when things get rough?"
"Even then. Dr. Roz was right our issues didn't break us up our lack of communication did. If we would have talked to each other and been honest from the beginning none of this would have ever happened."
"True."
"I want to live in this ridiculously large house with you and our baby and have a happy life."
"I want that too."
"I don't want my dad, or your brother or your crazy ex-fiancé to take that away from us."
"Me either."
"I don't want us to take that away from us either."
"We are our own worst enemies sometimes." Sam laughed.
"No more running—either one of us."
"No more running. No more hiding. We're in this together and we need to start acting like it."
"I agree."
"I love you Sam…I really, really love you and I'm terrified of losing you. That's why I ran, and that's why I was afraid to make any real commitment. I knew how strongly I felt for you and I thought if I protected myself then I wouldn't get hurt. I don't know why I am just now realizing that I spent all of my time preparing myself for something to happen. You were always going to disappoint me, you never had a chance…I set it up so that you would."
Sam sat back and took a minute to digest her words before finally saying, "I'm sorry."
"For what?" She asked him in surprise.
"For ever giving you a reason to doubt me. I was a complete and utter asshole when we first met and to be honest all I wanted to do was fuck you and get you out of my system. Don't beat yourself up for trying to protect yourself from me, you should have. I wasn't a good man and I didn't care that I wasn't one but now I want to be one. Not only because you deserve the best but because our little girl deserves the best as well. I'll be the first man that ever loves her and I want to make sure she knows it every single day so when she gets older and meets the man she is going to marry she'll know exactly how she deserves to be loved."
Sam reached his hands up and wiped at the tears that were trickling from the corner of Mercedes' eyes. "I'm sorry," she sniffled, "I swear I've cried more with this pregnancy than I have in my entire life!"
"It's okay," he chuckled, "it's only going to be happy tears from her on out."
"Promise?"
"I promise." With that Sam leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers before moving back and smiling at her. He moved to get up but Mercedes grabbed his shirt and tugged him closer. She took his face in his hands and looked at him with a deliberate look in her eyes and said, "I want more."
"Mercedes, I don't want to rush into anything…"
"Do you want me or not?"
"You know I want you."
"Good then shut up and kiss me."
Sam hesitated only a second longer before he moved forward and captured her lips with his again. They both moaned at the contact and the kiss instantly deepened. With their lips still connected Mercedes managed to maneuver herself that she was straddling Sam on the couch. She ground her hips in Sam and he tore his lips away from hers before groaning loudly against her neck.
"Not here," He panted, as he moved to get off the couch. Mercedes tried to get off of him but he tightened his hands on her hips and lifted her up as he stood. He gave her a quick tap on the ass so that she would wrap her legs around his waist.
"Mmmm….put me down, I'm too heavy."
"Shut up, Mercedes," Sam growled as he dug his fingers into her ass, "don't you know by now that I can handle you?"
Mercedes giggled and decided to just enjoy the ride. Those days in the gym paid off because Sam carried her through the house and up the stairs with ease. Once he reached the second floor he kicked Mercedes' bedroom door open and walked a few steps in and dropped her on the bed. She scooted back and watched as he ripped his shirt off and made quick work of his pants and underwear. Mercedes practically mewled at the sight of is taut body in all of its glory and she squeezed her thighs together to try and stop the ache that was growing there.
"You are wearing far too many clothes," Sam muttered in a husky voice and he grabbed her by the ankles and slid her back down the bed towards him. He yanked on the tie of her wrap dress and the silky black dress fell open showing her dark rose bra and panty set underneath. Sam's heated gaze momentarily softened as he took in Mercedes' ever growing baby bump. He ran his large hand over stomach before leaning forward and kissing it sweetly and saying, "how's Daddy's baby girl?"
Mercedes' heart melted at the question and she brought Sam's face back up to hers and kissed him thoroughly.
"I love you," She whispered against his mouth.
"I love you too," He grunted as he quickly divested her of her bras and shoved his thumbs in the sides of her underwear and yanked them off.
Once they were both undressed Sam pushed her back gently until her knees hit the back of the bed and she sat down on it. He advanced on her slowly causing her to scoot back down the bed again until she was lying flat on her back and he was hovering over her. He started kissing her on her neck and he worked down to her breasts and over her stomach until he was down to her parted thighs. Mercedes breath started to come out unnaturally loud and she let out a startled squeal when she felt Sam's warm tongue caressing her slick folds. She didn't know if it were the pregnancy or if it was because she had been without him for so long but everything felt heightened. She felt as if she could feel every hair on her scalp and every pore on her skin.
Sam's lips and tongue were a thing of magic and between the feeling of his plump lips sucking on her clit and his large, warm hands running over her body Mercedes came almost violently. Her whole body was shaking and she felt as if she was floating but she came back to earth quickly when she felt Sam slid inside her.
"Oh fuck, baby," he groaned as he waited for her body to adjust to his size, "you're even tighter than I remember."
Mercedes moaned at his words and unbelievably she felt herself becoming aroused again. She tightened her legs around Sam and she felt him start to move slowly. As he moved in and out he placed his forehead against hers and she could feel his warm, rapid breathing against her lips. He grabbed her hands and intertwined their fingers before putting them over her head.
"Do you feel that," He murmured against her lips, "do you feel how perfectly we fit together?"
"Mmmmm….yes," Mercedes moaned loudly as Sam started to pound into her harder.
"You were made for me," Sam groaned out, "do you understand you are mine and I'm yours."
"Yes," Mercedes answered breathlessly.
"Fuuuuuuuucccckkkk," Sam said on a long drawn out note as he came inside Mercedes and she moaned loudly as she clutched frantically at his damp hair.
Minutes later when they had both recovered enough to be coherent they looked at each other and laughed breathlessly.
"Well, we still got it." Sam chuckled.
"Uh-uh, we were good but we weren't this damn good."
The bed shook with their laughter and it wasn't too long before the laughs turned into sleepy grins and within a few minutes they were both asleep.
TUESDAY MORNING
"I'm hungry," Sam stated as he yawned widely, "somebody kept waking me up in the middle of the night but I'm not going to say any names."
"Ha, ha, very funny. I didn't see you complaining."
"Trust me, I'll never complain about that." Sam laughed.
He laid back on the bed and he closed his eyes in contentment. Life, in his opinion, didn't get any better.
He felt Mercedes running her fingers across his chest but she was strangely quiet. He opened his eyes to look at her and he found her watching him intently.
"You okay baby?"
"Yeah…I have a question and it's something I want you to take serious, okay?"
"Okay." He sat up and she followed suit, "you know you can ask me anything, right?"
"Good." She smiled at him but he could tell she was nervous. "I love you Sam."
"I love you too Mercedes," he smiled at her slightly, confused as to where the conversation was going.
Mercedes played with his fingers for a minute and when she looked back up at him her eyes shone with tears. "You mean everything to me…I know I haven't always shown it but you do. And I just…I love you more than anything and I just wanted to know…will you marry me?"
Sam looked at Mercedes for a long minute and he briefly considered pinching himself because he knew he had to be dreaming.
"What did you just say?"
"I said…marry me."