Hello to anybody who still sticks with me. I know it's been a while and there really is no good excuse. I've been quite busy lately, but I could have updated this story sooner, since I wrote this literally months ago. I won't loose any more words on this pointless subject. I hope you enjoy it anyway

And since it's 25th of May (a total coincidence, I just thought of it right now) happy Geek pride day

Dislaimer: I don't own this Star Wars or any of its characters

Chapter 19 – Imperial's word

She felt betrayed. Of course she had considered the option that Han might eventually leave at some point and she would never have forced him to stay and yet she couldn't imagine he'd leave in such abject way, in the middle of the night without even saying goodbye.

Staring at the empty space where Falcon had landed hours ago she tried to think of some sort of explanation for Han's departure, but even to her everything that she thought of seemed unbelievable.

He left.

The fact was slowly settling in her mind, but she still wasn't quite capable of accepting it as unquestionable truth. She didn't know why it was so very hard for her to understand it, but she knew she felt close to Han in ways she couldn't even define. She guessed there were things people couldn't endure together without eventually becoming friends.

She wandered through mostly empty corridors experiencing enormous effort every time she had to greet a person passing by. Trying not to think of anything connected with Captain Solo she headed for the cafeteria, where she ate an early breakfast all by herself. Food supplies seemed to be dried due to the party and it was back to the rations, most commonly the only food available in the rebel base. She wasn't hungry and strangely she found even that small piece of what could hardly be called food hard to consume.

Her comlink went off. "Organa" she answered.

"Princess, this is General Dodonna speaking. Would you please come to High Command chambers as soon as possible?"

"I'll be there" she replied as calm as she possibly could though suspecting the reason behind the invitation.

She had no problem finding her destination, since she had been there on numerous occasions, mostly while accompanying her father on one of his meetings with other Council members, yet the way there seemed dreadfully long and every step she took seemed to be an echo of the thoughts forming in her mind.

Left.

Coward.

Liar.

Shaking her thoughts away Leia stopped just outside the High Commands headquarters, steadying herself for a brief second. She opened the door and froze in surprise. Then her face lit with extreme happiness and disbelief at the same time. There right in front of her stood a man, she thought to be dead.

"Carlist" she whispered.

She ran into his welcoming embrace and she was just too happy to care for the pain that caused her.

"I'm so glad to see you alright" said Carlist Rieekan. "When I heard your ship was damaged beyond repair in asteroid accident, I feared the worst, but I knew something wasn't quite right."

"Never mind that. How did you…" started Leia, but her loss of words was obvious.

Alderaanian knew what she wanted to say and replied sadly: "I was on Delaya when it… when it happened."

Leia's heart skipped a bit and a new spark of hope ignited inside her chest. "My father?" she asked hopefully.

Rieekan's face darkened and he slowly shook his head, his gaze lowering to the ground.

"But" she started quickly "he might have been off planet as well…"

"Leia" he interrupted and put his hand on her shoulder to steady her down. He paused looking into her eyes and she understood even before he explained. "I spoke with him minutes before Death Star appeared. He was in Aldera. I'm sorry."

Leia looked away and nodded in silent acceptance.

"We need to talk Princess" said Dodonna and showed her to her seat. Other occupants of the room, Mothma, Dodonna, Raikeen and Kenobi took seats as well, but on the other side of the table. Leia felt uneasy by this and the four pairs of eyes staring straight at her made her nervous.

"Firstly" spoke Mothma "I would like to present our condolences on behalf of the High Command and the Alliance itself.

Leia's jaw clenched.

"Alderaan was a devastating loss to whole galaxy" added Chief of State.

A mournful silence fell on the chamber, but it ended rather quickly. "If I understand correctly, you were taken captive by the Empire and brought aboard their battle station called Death Star" spoke Mon Mothma. Her voice was soft yet somehow emotionless and strictly diplomatic.

"Yes" answered Leia shortly.

"Why?" asked Mothma.

"They wanted to know the location of this base."

Silence followed and Raikeen buried his tired features into his hands.

"Explain" ordered Mothma.

Leia felt as if she was being questioned as a criminal and irritation swept over her. Choosing her words carefully, she said: "Vader knew, I don't know how, that I was connected with the Alliance. I suppose my father and I were his prime suspects for a while now and when Death Stars plans were sent to my ship by one of Alliances connections, he finally got the reason he needed to take me into custody."

"What happened then?" asked the older woman.

It cost her great effort, but her face remained blank and expressionless. "For what I'm concerned they don't know our location." she said.

Raikeen finally lifted his face and Mothma and General Dodonna exchanged glances.

"Actually" spoke Mothma after a while "They most likely do."

"It can't be. How?" Leia asked surprised.

"Captain Solo's ship, the Millenium Falcon, was bugged" explained Dodonna. "We cannot be completely certain, but it is safe to assume that the Empire already knows where we are."

Leia found it hard to follow the conversation for the next few seconds as she completely lost Dodonna with the word ´bugged´

"We have to decide what to do now" she heard Mothma say after a while.

"I think we should evacuate the base as soon as possible" spoke up Raikeen who was otherwise silent all through the meeting.

"I think this is overreacting. We should wait until we are absolutely sure about this leak of information" said General Dodonna.

"It might be a bit too late when we are absolutely sure" argued Raikeen.

"We are not ready" contradicted Dodonna

"Empire won't wait until we are"

"Gentlemen" spoke Mothma to bring their verbal fight to an end. "Let's stay civil." She sighed. "Master Kenobi, what do you think about all this?"

"My thoughts on this are very divided" admitted the old Jedi. "I partly agree with Raikeen, but I can't quite disagree with Dodonna either. In my humble opinion it is quite crucial for us to first find a suitable planet to host our next base, before we make any rash decisions."

Mothma nodded and turned to Leia. "What about you, Princess? What do you think of this?"

Leia still shocked with the information about Falcon being bugged snapped back to reality.

"I am not a member of the High Council" she replied.

"Do you wish to be?" asked Mothma. "Do you wish to take your father's place among us?"

Her fathers place Leia contemplated Mothma's words. Until that very moment she was always following Bail Organa's footsteps even if perhaps she didn't always realize it and at times it bothered her that everyone expected her to do so. This all ended in that split second when Alderaan exploded. Then it became personal. It became not her father's, but her war.

Leia nodded. It seemed as the only thing she was absolutely sure of in that particular moment.

"But I do have to ask you something" she spoke. "This is not something I would like to inherit, so when you're considering granting me the position in High Council, keep in mind that it's me you're giving the position, not my father, or gods forbid, because of him."

"We will take a vote about this later" decided Mothma "For now, I would like to hear your opinion on this matter."

As much as Leia didn't want to believe that Han would betray their location, and more her trust, her opinion of this was clear: "I agree with Raikeen, we shouldn't risk it. We must evacuate at once."

"Thank you. Now the Council shall discuss this (and your position) a bit further" said Mothma. "You may go."

Leia however didn't make any attempt to leave. "Captain Solo" she said. "What happened to him?"

Mothma sighed "He was detained, along with that young man he brought with him. His ship is being searched in hangar bay 4 as we speak."

"How did you find out it was bugged?" asked Leia.

"I ordered it scanned soon after you landed. Something didn't feel quite right about that man."

Leia knew that arguing at this point would only do more harm so she said as calmly as possible: "I understand. I'll leave you to your business then."

"Wait, Leia" cut in Raikeen. "May I just have word with you?" Then he turned back to Mothma sitting on his left. "It won't take long."

"Alright, we will wait for you" replied Mothma. "There is a formation of a certain squadron I have to discuss with General Dodonna anyway. And with Master Kenobi as well, since it involves his apprentice."

After leaving the Council chambers, Leia and Raikeen sat down in symbolical waiting room in front of Mon Mothma's office. For a minute they sat in silence and Leia knew he was observing her, but her own gaze rested somehow unfocused on his chairs legs.

"Are you alright, Leia?" asked a gentle voice and she forced her own eyes to meet his.

"Yes, I'm fine, thank you" she replied automatically.

Raikeen shook his head sadly. "Oh Leia, please don't do this to yourself."

"Do what? I'm fine, really!" she said louder this time.

"I don't think you're being honest here" replied Alderaanian calmly.

"I'm okay" she repeated angrily.

Raikeen watched her in astonishment and Leia stared back with defiance. Then she looked away in slight embarrassment.

"That's not you Leia" he said slowly.

Leia took a deep breath before responding. "I'm not sure who I am anymore." That wasn't what she wanted to say, but the words flew from her mouth before she could stop herself. "I'm supposed to be a senator, but there is no more Senate." Her voice was somehow harsh. "I am supposed to be Princess Leia Organa of Alderaan, but Alderaan is gone" she said surprised that though it was something so impossible to say, she said it so easily.

It seemed now that she had started, she wasn't able to stop. And that was what she was afraid of.

"Everything that I was not long ago so sure of seems to be collapsing."

She stood in front of small detention center, which was almost never really used. Leia wanted to clear some things in her head first before she went in there and faced Han and she paced restlessly in front of the entrance. A day ago, when she was in Mon Mothma's office the latter told her that she doubted her conclusions regarding Captain Solo. Leia didn't like when others doubted her or her decisions, but with years in service of the Imperial Senate she learned to calmly accept it. But when it came to doubting herself, Leia knew she was no good at it.

Many things crossed her mind, all at once.

He used to be an Imperial. He worked for Tarkin and Vader, for people who destroyed my planet. He was about to torture me… But he didn't. He risked his own life to save mine. He helped destroy the Death Star, he was kind and gentle and…

Could he really be a spy? Could it all have been just an act? All the beating they've done to him just to gain him her sympathy. Could I have judged him so wrong?

The truthful though hurtful answer would have been yes. Her father's lectures were now often coming up her mind and that was interesting since while Bail was alive, she never paid enough attention to them. Even more, she most often found them annoying and useless. But now she found an odd amount of both pain and comfort in such brief memories.

"A man is really great when he can trust his judgment even if all others doubt him. While stubbornness is at times an admirable quality, you should not be so arrogant that you will not consider the thoughts of your doubters."

She had to admit that even though her late father's words were undeniably wise, they weren't really helping at the moment.

At first Han only heard raised voices. Stone walls muffled them beyond recognition, but they still caught his attention. He was growing more and more restless as the time passed and even though it couldn't have been more than a few hours, the small room where he and Fion were being held in, started to get on his nerves. The boy had been awfully quiet all through the night and morning. He just sat there in the corner, his face sour, and all Han's attempts of making a conversation or lightening the mood were unsuccessful and went more or less unnoticed.

The voices grew louder and then the door burst open.

"But Your Highness…" protested a man, a guard apparently.

"Go ahead" said Leia impatiently "report me"

The guard was confused and opened his mouth to say something, but seeing determined expression on young woman's face thought better of it. He glanced calculably at Han one last time and after a few moments of hesitation left. Leia sighed in relief and turned to Han, not quite sure what to say.

"Hey Your Worship, finally decided to pay us a visit?" said Han, unable not to sound just a little bit accusingly.

"I didn't know about any of this" responded Leia, not missing his tone.

"Do you at least know why the kriff are we here?" he asked angrily.

"Well, yes I do" Leia hesitated. " A device was found aboard Falcon."

Han looked puzzled and Leia observed his facial expression attentively.

"A tracking device" she added.

Fion lifted his head, but remained quiet.

"The Council thinks…" Leia started.

"That I'm the spy" finished Han in her stead. "Well that explains the rough handling" he said with irony. He paced around the cell for a while, than turned back to Leia. "You don't believe that, do you?"

"No" she said.

There was only a glimpse of hesitation, but Han caught it anyway. "Yeah you do" he spoke disappointed.

"Well what do you expect me to do?" she asked her temper raising.

"How about trust me" he suggested mirroring her angry emotions.

"Just like that?"

"Yeah, just like that" he replied. "I already told you to trust me once. I was dragging you from your cell, if you care to remember, saving your pretty little royal ass. You didn't have many objections then."

Leia was preparing an angry retort, but nothing seemed right, since what he was saying was in fact the truth.

"I didn't know Falcon was bugged and it sure as hell wasn't me who did it." said Han. "You have my word."

Imperial's word added the inner voice inside Leia's head. She exhaled slowly. "It's not that simple."

Han looked at her with utter disappointment and disbelief.

"You have to understand that a little more than a day ago, I was promised that Alderaan would be spared if I revealed the location of this base" spoke Leia coolly. "I've seen what Imperial's word is."

"That's not the same" he disagreed. "I'm not Tarkin, you know me."

"Tarkin said I was too trusting" she replied dismissively. "Maybe he was right."

"If you start regarding yourself on base of what that slime said, you're in for some trouble Princess" he replied. "But fine, you don't have to believe me. Can you at least get Fion out?"

"I'm afraid not" she answered. "I'm not yet an official member of the High Council and until then my authority here is basically inexistent. Being here in the first place is going to get me into much trouble, but I'll see what I can do."

"Thanks" said Han. "So, what happenes now?"

"I don't know…"

There was a knock on the door that made her flinch in surprise.

"Princess, are you in there?" asked a voice on the other side of the door which Leia recognized as Raikeen's.

"Yes" she said, but her voice sounded raucous of being quiet for a long period of time. "Yes" she repeated this time louder and went to open the door.

"I thought I might find you here" said Raikeen, while standing in the doorway of what used to be Bail Organa's office. "Can I come in?"

She nodded and stepped aside.

"I came to tell you that the Council has reached its decision about your position." He smiled, "After a lot of reconciliation we have decided to make you a full righted member of the High Council."

"Thank you" said Leia distracted. "Mon was against it wasn't she?" Leia required after a while.

"I won't lie" replied Raikeen "The Council wasn't even on this matter. Dodonna and Master Kenobi were both strongly against your appointment and I disagreed with them of course, but in the end it was Mon who decided to grant you the position."

That was a surprise for Leia. "Did Dodonna and Kenobi explain their reasons?"

Raikeen looked a bit uneasy. "Dodonna might have mentioned your youth and inexperience once or twice, but I don't think I'm the one you should discuss this with."

"Yes of course. Anyway, thank you for you support Carlist. It's good to have someone on my side" responded Leia. "So I understand that you have decided about what to do with the base as well?"

"We're staying, but that's just a temporary solution, until we find a suitable planet for our next base." answered Raikeen.

"I still think this is a bad idea" said Leia.

"I agree, but the decision was made and we should respect it. That reminds me, here is your first official assignment" Raikeen motioned on a pile of data cards and papers he was carrying and laid them down on the table. "I've brought you the files Mon wants you to take a look at. These are just some of the locations we have been considering. Try to find something that would suit our needs."

"Alright" she replied "I'll do my best."

They stood in the middle of the office and there was an awkward silence between the two. Their brief conversation outside of conference room was apparently still fresh in their memory.

"Mon would like you to take your father's office as your own" said Alderaanian softly.

"I don't really know why I came here" spoke Leia, but truthfully she didn't even know how she got there. "I suppose I was" she started, but fell silent. Looking for advice sounded ridiculous.

Raikeen smiled sadly and casted a glance around the room. Makin a few steps he stopped at a drawer upon which were about dozen holographs.

"You remember this, Lelila?" he asked and pointed at the picture of Bail and Leia who must have been around eight or nine years old. She was sitting in her fathers lap and they were both smiling widely, with some teeth missing on Leia's part.

"Yes. Father was on a diplomatic visit on… Well I can't remember where it was. He took a day off, so we all went to visit a local zoo. You were the one to take the picture."

"It was a fine day" sighed the man, moving his eyes from a small smiling girl on the picture to serious young woman she had become. He smiled sadly. "I'll leave you to your work then" he said and left.

Leia was once again left alone in her father's office. Her office.

Before Raikeen came in she was going through some drawers, not knowing what she was expecting to find or why doing it in the first place, since she closed every single one of them as soon as she realized it wasn't completely empty. She wasn't yet able to go through her father's possessions, though there was only very few of them, but she realized that at some point, she'd have to do it.

She picked an empty box and started putting away, first things on the table then drawers and in the end she stopped by the holographs. Most of them were of her, two or three of her adoptive mother Breha, who died when Leia was a child, and some others of Bail's sisters. She didn't take a good look at any of them, the memories of Alderaan were all too fresh as it was, but when she came to that picture that caught Raikeen's attention she stopped. A smile crossed her lips for a brief moment.

About half an hour later she finished cleaning up and holographs were all put away and storaged in a box, out of her view. But the one of her father and her remained in its old place.

Well that's all I have so far, but please be so kind and leave a comment. Tell my what you liked or what you perhaps disliked, so this story could get better. Until next time :)