living corpse Chapter 6: beautiful new day, a bleach fanfic

Bang. Bang.

Stop. Blink. Breathe.

And scream.

Walk forward -- you're moving backwards. The scenery is reversing, almost as if time is turning back.

The faces blur -- the lights change colour -- the alcohol glasses chink against each other -- and you remember.

This was back in the day when you had a good time.

But your head's still a little fuzzy, like you've had one too many. It doesn't matter, it never does. Never… ever…

All that counts is that you're living in the moment.

Drumming. Drumming. Drumming. When did you start drumming your fingers on the wheel?

And then suddenly you see a familiar face before a sickening --

She gasps, opening her eyes as flutters awake to consciousness, light peeking through her long black strands of hair, mussed up and fuzzy like bumblebees in awkward flight.

Sighing, her eyelids close, covering blue eyes, and her head drops back into the pillow. It's a very comfy pillow, compared to the graveyard's hard cold tarmac ground… which has turned into something nice and soft.

Hang on.

… where is she?

Take a deep breath. Make it two.

And when you open your eyes, do not scream bloody murder.

Take everything in… and then slowly fizzle, like a slow kettle that is ready to explode into bubbles of metal.

On three.

Two.

One.

"Oh, kami. You stalked me."

Aren't mirrors just perfect windows of opportunity?

Call it curiosity, fool. The midget ghost girl folds her arms and upturns her nose, swinging her legs through the cupboard that she sat on top of. I was curious as where your captors wanted to take you, and then make a ransom note to your loved ones. Like proper pirates in novels.

"Go on, humour me, you daft girl. Where am I?" Wriggling around and testing her shoulders, knees and toes, Karin pushes herself up, from the comfortable and warm duvet. Gazing around, she notes the window (a possible escape route) and the half-closed door. If she squints, she can see a speck of white just in front of the sofa.

Ichigo and Hinamori's residence. Rukia informs her, fixing a steely glare. Which you would have known had you come to the house-warming party.

Predictably, Karin's head flops back onto the pillow. "Oh, jeez, not this again."

Her head is killing her. Stupid hangovers.

What's worse is that she remembers everything she said yesterday. She wasn't that drunk to completely obviate her memory.

Still, on a good note, at least Ichigo's looking out for her.

Again? I didn't even start.

"That's right. Best thing to say to drunken idiots: truthful things that don't really mean a lot. Small comforts that sooth the soul because it's what they want to hear."

Yawning is good; Karin makes a mental note as she does so, to remind her self in the future.

Stretching is also good – tests those limbs just a bit as she circles her wrists, fingers spread out and going up and down like a mad pianist.

That was a pretty good nap.

And now back to the main issue.

Finished?

"So kind of you wait for my inner monologue."

Rukia arches her eyebrow, tempted to say that she was actually waiting for her to finish stretching, but declines. Exhaling, she composes herself, leaning forward.

… okay. Are you ready, now?

"Mm." She's pushing it, Karin knows this very well, but she likes to walk a dangerous path. "I'd rather take a shower first."

Foolish procrastinator.

"Yes. Yes, I am. And with that, my morning is complete."

Too bad you don't have any spare clothes.

"… damn it. You've foiled my evil plan." Snapping her fingers and grimacing in good nature, the younger girl finds the willpower to leave the bed, her feet touching the ground.

"But Matsu-chan, we can't, not here…"

--flip--

"Today there will be sunshine…"

--flip--

"Ichiban! Ichiban lipstick for men! Ichiban lipstick for men… saiko."

"Wow. Aside from the fact that the guy can jump… he's got really blue lips." A voice comments behind him.

Alarmed, Hitsugaya Toushirou switches off the television, tensing.

Sleeping beauty has finally woken up.

Guess she didn't need a kiss like Kurosaki Ichigo said. Jokingly, of course, before the slight threat was made that could only be understood through subtle man-talk. And man-talk is always subtle.

"So… were you trying to look nice for a man, or did I catch you at a bad time?"

The sleepy raven haired girl yawned once more, bumping into the sofa, offering a half-hearted grin to the white-haired boy, not expecting a return smile. And she's right, for he only frowned, in retaliation; she only curbs her smug feeling and joins him in the silent solitude, her intuition warning her that it's best not to go there.

But she breaks the silence as easily as breathing; it's like second nature to her.

"Where's Nii-san and Momo?"

Even if she breaks it, she can't dissipate the awkwardness between them. That needs a little more work.

"At the hospital." Looking away, he turns the television back on, surfing through the channels.

"Everything okay?" It's only natural to ask, and besides, her tone is light and carefree as she sits on the arm of the sofa.

"… nothing out of the ordinary. Kurosaki has his job to do, and Momo… well, it's a standard hospital check up." He shrugs, unaware that Karin doesn't know about Momo's current situation.

"Excuse me?" She narrows her eyes; blue outlined by black, and is suddenly much closer to his face. "What check up? Is she dying? Got cancer, or another terminal disease?" Her eyes dart about, as the possibilities come to mind, her mouth parting. "Oh no! Nii-san must be… kami-sama… poor Ichi-nii…"

"Um… Momo's pregnant." Slowly, he inches away, as he notices the similarities between Yuzu and Karin. They're more alike than he originally thought. "Has been for quite some time."

The colour drains out of the youngest Kurosaki's face as the cogs turn.

"You… didn't know?" The stunned expression on his face is adorable, almost comically so.

Not… dying…

Pregnant…

Pregnant?

Pregnant!

Which means…

And in that moment, as it clicks, the smile that spreads across her face is beautiful.

"I'm an aunt! Fuck, that makes me sound so old!"

Impulsively, her arms throw themselves around his neck and she leaps from her original position, crash landing like trains derailing into impending death as they topple over the sofa and onto the floor, messily sprawled out close together. She just can't stop grinning or wincing because the volume that she's producing is hurting her ears.

"I'm an aunt! Yay!"

… the similarities are now disturbing Hitsugaya to the degree that he wants to run away and shout his lungs out.

"Hey… get off… oi!" There is too much contact. And he watches her in frozen fascination as her realization slowly forces her to come to terms with real life, and more importantly… their position.

Instant back pedalling commences clumsily, red-faced and looking anywhere, anywhere but him, is immediately put in action. Though the end result is both of them embarrassed with the revelation, they are no longer touching and are far away from each other, which is what they both want.

Karin coughs, cursing her moment of weakness and joy. The fact that it was Hitsugaya Toushirou of all people aggravates her even further.

"So… breakfast?"

He nods. Once, twice, perhaps a little too vigorously for his own good.

"Breakfast sounds good." His voice sounds a little gruff.

Karin arches her eyebrow. "Well. I think… you should hop to it, dragon boy."

"Dragons don't hop, they fly."

"Then fly to it, breath some fire and fucking make something for me. Or are you not hungry?" Sardonic, she deadpans, annoyed that he'd be so geeky to actually correct her on the proper behaviour of fictional creatures of mythology.

"And yourself?" Resigned to his fate, he asks her, boring into her eyes.

"I… will be… I will be…" She swallows, feeling the hangover kick in, pushing upwards. "… vomiting…"

There are two thoughts in the mind of Kurosaki Karin at this precise moment.

The first is: Fuck.

The other is: I'm going to kick Ichigo's butt for not telling me this sooner.

Being the kind, though not talkative man that Hitsugaya Toushirou is, gentlemanlike through his frosty exterior, after the whole debacle of the disgusting morning after, aiding her by pulling back her hair, allows her to rest her head on the breakfast table, mumbling curses best left unheard as he, alone, prepares breakfast.

"Here." He hands her coffee, carefully observing her and making sure that no contact is made.

"… thanks." Grudgingly, she accepts, lifting her head up and smoothing out her hair before drinking.

Though they are not on the best of terms, they can be civil to each other, even though the events that happened yesterday unhelpfully made things a tad more difficult.

"Mm. This is good!" She admits, praising him, as her smile blinds him. "You make very good coffee."

Hitsugaya suddenly looks sheepish, clearly unused to it, though she pretends not to notice under her happy go lucky pretence.

"Anyways," Karin offers a grin, after setting the coffee down and wiping her face. "I have a deal for you."

living corpse
6 : beautiful new day

What?

First, he restrains the urge to simply stare and open his mouth.

Second, he remembers to breathe and not simply guffaw in disbelief. It's crucial not to break the peace that is temporarily established between them. For Momo, if nothing else.

Third, he speaks, sitting opposite her, maintaining eyelevel.

"A deal?"

"If it helps, you look like shit."

Karin Kurosaki is blunt when she wants to be. Sometimes subtlety works, other times it doesn't. This time, she has decided that direct course of action is the best way to go.

"You're not looking so good either." Hitsugaya retorts, bristling and slowly slipping into a more childish demeanour.

"Hangover, babe. Give me time and I'll be the prettiest princess out of the whole knights in armour thing." She shrugs, watching the endearment affect his composure slightly out of the corner of her eye. "So, interested?"

"I haven't heard it yet." He was always keen to stick to structure.

She laughs, half-amused at him, half-annoyed that he's still a stick in the mud. "Right… right… okay, here it is: I'm going to go to a lot of places, sight-see and whatever… anyways, I'd like you to come with me."

And his face goes blank. Light blue eyes mull over the option, carefully, cautiously, weighing the pros and cons heavily.

Then he sighs, asking her simply. "Have you thought this through?"

Minus five points for treating her as a child.

Plus ten points for giving her nice coffee.

Minus twenty points for essentially thinking her an idiot.

Overall, the points that lie between herself and him as a general bonding time session is minus four hundred and thirty-six.

They have a long way to go.

… she has got to work on that smile that shows when she's mad but faking happiness. The vein is unavoidable.

No doubt it's scaring him.

And clamping her teeth around her lips is becoming very painful.

"Yes. I have." She says a little forced, almost through gritted teeth, though she releases the pressure and soothes it with a nice cup of caffeine. Karin takes another sip for good measure, processing the fact that she has to be civil. For Ichigo.

Even though she strongly dislikes the fucking frozen dragon boy, she's only doing it for Rukia. Someone has to take care of him. And the night before, she had offered. Besides, she doesn't break her promises.

Not even if they broke her.

… stop.

Rewind.

Fast forward.

Don't think about the past.

Not yet.

Just keep in mind the vow that has been made.

"Look, I know… we're not the best of friends. Hell, we both make fools of ourselves, if you don't count yesterday…" Karin squirms, still uncomfortable with that event. "But, I wanted to say…" She swallows and musters the courage to follow through with it. "… sorry."

He blinks, letting this slowly become processed. It's never happened before. "You've matured."

Instantly her eyes narrow and she pouts. "I did say that I changed, did I not?"

"… yeah. You also said…" His mouth curves into a ghost of a smile, slightly tipping upwards. "That you were a little messed up."

She shrugs at that, unfazed. "Well, I'm not a perfect being. I've got my faults, just as you've got yours. That makes us human." Absentmindedly, her fingers lace around a rebellious curl, toying with it before tucking it behind her ear. "But… I think you need a break. From thinking, reflecting, maybe, or… whatever the hell you did." She leans forward, with only good intentions in mind, her voice soft and gentle. "And maybe, now, after everything that's happened, you need to get away. Live a little."

The coffee is warm and it tastes so damn good.

Relaxing, she slouches, making herself comfortable, digging into the breakfast that he has made.

"Take as much time as you want to think about it… but while you do that, take a shower. You smell." And the grin comes easily to her lips.

Live a little.

Stop thinking, reflecting about the past.

You can't live like this forever.

Not if you want to be happy.

She… would have wanted to see you happy.

Rukia.

The mirror is foggy and steam is everywhere.

But he's made his decision.

Hitsugaya Toushirou comes to her later, dressed in the same clothes as opposed to being naked and barely wearing a towel, as she places the pen down, folding a sheet of paper with a doodle accompanied on top of it.

He notes her watching him with a guarded front, curious to his answer. She must have found new clothes and cleaned up, wide awake and not in her sleeping gear, for she wears something different to what she was wearing before. It's… nice.

"So?" Her voice is slick and smooth and calm, piqued with interest.

"I…" His throat chokes, but that's alright, and he wants her to hear these words. "I want to go with you."

"Okay." She nods, offering him a grin, and a hand. "Then we have a deal?"

"We have a deal." He acquiesces, still unsure, but tired of living in such a zombie like manner.

And their handshake is short and sweet.

But he never notices her smile, frayed softly around the edges and cracking in between. Soon it will shatter.

That smile.

They weren't always like this.

They used to be friends, practising on the same team, and argue about height and things that don't mean anything.

They used to be adolescents who danced at parties and knew how to have a good time.

They used to be teenagers who were caught up in love triangles and fits of passion, the good and the bad.

They used to be strangers who decided not to talk to each other.

They used to be so many things.

And now she's trying to break the pattern, because life's not fixed, it's a constant flux of unpredictable shit.

Reaching out is the best thing she can do.

Maybe that will make a difference. Maybe not.

Only time can say, though only the actions that made consequences can make it possible.

"Okay, pack your bags, and we'll get going." She claps her hands, the quick action making her flinch away from him.

"Just like that?" Surprised, he raises an eyebrow.

"Well, yeah." Karin shrugs, looking round. "What's stopping ya? Let's go, already." She takes his hand, leading him towards the door.

"But—" He stops, jerking his hand back. "—stop."

"What?" She whirls back, an indecipherable emotion flashing within her eyes. Impatience. "I've left a letter, told them that I'm taking you somewhere far, far away, and if you've got anything to do, do it now, because we are getting out of here!"

He is quiet for a second, staring at her, mute and still. Karin closes her eyes and breathes, reopening them in order to keep her temper in check.

"… why are you doing this?" He finally asks.

There are so many ways to answer that question and out of the corner of her eye, she sees Rukia's reflection. Her gaze burns into her façade.

Because I promised Rukia.

Because people are selfish.

Because you want an escape.

Time. Place. Coincidence. These are various factors that contribute to the answer.

But she only says this, her eyes faraway as she meets his lighter blue ones.

"Because we used to be friends, and I'd like to see you enjoy life instead of wallow in misery. Nobody deserves that."

And it's the truth; one of many.

He accepts the reason with a slight tilt to the head. "Okay."

"Now can we go?" Exasperated, she walks towards the door.

He rolls his eyes, eventually following her.

Maybe… maybe the journey won't be so bad.

Or maybe it will… because Karin likes to sing to the radio.

And she cannot sing. At all.

Rukia only grins through the car's mirror screen, much to Karin's annoyance.

Thank you, Karin. She whispers.

Karin only sings louder.

When Hitsugaya Toushirou looks up, it's the first time that he's noticed that the sun spreads across a blue sky.

It's clear and cloudless, holding no regrets.