living corpse Chapter 15: the cookie crumbles, a bleach fanfic

Shit happens.

No matter what transpires, what life you live, what hand you are dealt.

Shit has happened, shit is happening and shit will happen.

It comes in the form of a phone call, in the form of a person you once knew, in the form of something that sends shivers down your spine.

But you know what? That doesn't matter.

What does matter is how you deal with it, taking advantage or disadvantage of the situation and making it work in your favour or against it.

Because depending on that determines the type of life you live.

And right now, what matters is that Ryouhei – mean, foul-mouthed, narcissist Toba Ryouhei, is giving Kurosaki Karin a piggyback ride.

For the record: Donny did offer Hitsugaya Toushirou one as well, but he respectfully declined.

Or rather, just stared. And glared. Right there.

… that was the person they knew and loved.

"Okay men! Listen up, we are going pave the way for mankind to move forward, and for that, we need our times tables." Karin cheers, hand up in the air like the Statue of Liberty, without the torch.

"Whoa, watch it, Kurosaki. If you don't, then I'm going to drop you." Ryou-chan scowls, trying hard to maintain his balance.

"Gotcha. Okay, first… Toushirou – six times six is what?" Snapping her fingers in his direction, she waits for his answer.

"Thirty six." Instantly, he replies.

"Wrong! Correct answer… ba-dum-dum, Zu-kun?" Karin drums on Ryouhei's shoulders.

"A hundred and fifty-two." Kazuya smirks.

"Right on! Next one, Donny, eight times two equals?"

"Three!"

"Damn straight."

And so it continues, the weird flaw of mathematics, and how the wrong answer is the right one, up until they reached the apartments of the reunited soccer gang, because it's what they did to pass the time. Or at least, when Karin is with them.

The lesson to be learned: mankind is idiotic, and only through their mistakes will they realize that nobody fucking cares anyway. That's progress.

So sit back, relax and make sure that you enjoy the ride of headless horsemen and carriages while disintegrating graveyard ghosts.

Who says that love, life, or friendship, has to make sense anyway?

"Right, men. We're here. At the apartments. So, is there anything we need to know?" Karin says, dismounting and brushing the dust off her clothes; a grin easily forming on her face, matching the way she slips into her role of being their leader.

"Uh, not really." Pinta thinks for a minute. "I live in this apartment with Donny, and Ryou-chan and Zu-kun live in the apartment next to us."

"Ah. You moved." Karin notes, with a noncommittal noise. "What happened there?"

"Ryouhei decided that Donny's too messy to live with. And boom! Our Odd Couple dream vanished." Kazuya supplies, glasses flashing. "So, I went in place of him and live there now."

"Oh." Toushirou says, for lack of better say.

"… yeah." Toba Ryouhei looks away, mildly wondering if he should eat the chewing gum stowed in his pocket. "So, who's living where?"

There's a pause.

Blue eyes meet.

Karin nibbles on her lip.

Toushirou shifts.

And the moment is gone.

"Um…" Karin tucks back her hair behind her ear. "I'm going to live with Donny and Pinta. That okay with you?"

"Yeah. Fine. Why wouldn't it be?" Blank, Toushirou replies.

"Just checking." Shrugging, Karin turns away, as if it's no big deal.

Donny's eyebrow arches, amused and unseen.

Once everything is settled and unpacked, the most attentive out of the group decides to seek out his queen. With a smile on her lips and a hum in her throat, she pulls the sheets over the sofa.

"Hey."

Turning sleepily, she tilts her head as faint bemusement. "Donny, hey, you alright?"

"You're going to bed already?"

"Yeah." Not even bothering to stifle a yawn, Karin nods. "Don't be a worrywart; I'm here for a while. I won't be gone when the sun rises. You have to remember that I have a prisoner here, and I'm not leaving without him."

"Karin…"

Flinching slightly, she looks away, not liking the tone of her best friend.

"You like him, don't you?"

"…"

Shut up.

"You do."

The silence is swallowing her, confirming his answer.

Listlessly, she relaxes into the sofa, back finding a comfortable spot with the cushions.

"Karin."

Karin.

Karin.

Shoot me.

"Say something." Donny murmurs, touching her shoulder.

It feels wrong. His touch. His warmth. The colour of his eyes. The shade of his hair.

Everything.

Anything.

All of it.

Wrong.

"He's not Renji, you know."

"… I know." Karin mumbles, her dark eyelashes moist. "I know."

"So. What are you going to do?"

"About what?" Blinking, Hitsugaya Toushirou asks, slightly surprised at the question.

"You. Karin. The whole situation." Ryouhei flatly answers, folding his arms into his chest.

"And do not, for one second, mister, play ignorant." Kazuya nods, pulling a serious face and failing spectacularly. "We've known Karin for a long time, and you – for that matter, though not as well since… you know. That. Anyways, we know you haven't the dirty deed yet, so, again, I ask—"

"—we ask—" Ryouhei cuts in.

"We ask." Zu-kun corrects. "What are you going to do?"

"And if you say 'ignore it', then you are so going to get a punch in the face, damn the repercussions." Toba Ryouhei all but snarls. "Last time that happened we lost our best player—"

"—second best—"

"Right. Second best player. And we… we weren't the same after that." Ryouhei's voice lowers, almost embarrassed by the memories. "And of course, since we had pledged our alliance to Kurosaki Karin, we couldn't really talk to you."

"Well, we could but, really, we shouldn't. Not fair to her. Our leader, our sister." Zu-kun shrugs, not helping.

"Enough with the hero worship, Zu. She's rejected you enough for you to call it quits." Ryouhei mocks with a sideways glance. "Back to you, Toushirou."

"Um, talk?" Honestly, the situation with Karin is… complicated. Thoughts don't cross his mind as easily as he hopes whenever he's with her.

Ryouhei snorts, immediately derisive. "Oh, we got real Romeo here. Talk he says. He's been travelling with her for kami-sama's sake for however long, finds out that he has a thing for her after all, and how does he show his new found affection? Fucking talk."

"What you gotta do, is snog her senseless." Usaka Kazuya advises.

… it's pretty sound advice.

Damn, he's tired.

And so, with a yawn, he stands up, muttering, that he'll do it in the morning.

That is, before his legs buckle before him and he's instantly caught by the two men.

"… you gave him alcohol." Zu-kun observes.

"Not like you didn't do the same." Ryouhei shrugs. "Git deserved it. Breaking her heart and all that rot; we suffered because of him."

"Aye. Revenge comes at last. And, we're finally making her realize that he's the one." Kazuya nods.

There is silence.

"… you fucking sap."

"Shut up."

Clearly, Toba Ryouhei, is not a romantic.

"You know what, Donny?" Karin decides, with merriment in her voice. "Tomorrow, I'm going to get smashed."

"Night, Karin." Donny smiles, turning the light off.

She dreams of dragons, flying in clear blue skies.

living corpse
15 : the cookie crumbles

The morning does not go well. Well. For Hitsugaya Toushirou, who sleeps in the sofa, who awakens to the knocking of the door, knows his mornings have never quite been normal since meeting Kurosaki Karin and agreeing to go on a road trip.

But nonetheless, he opens the door, still drowsy and in part of his slumber, remembers the sound advice that makes complete sense.

Especially, if she's wearing his oversized t-shirt and revealing some very nice legs.

How she has them is another story.

"Karin." With a yawn, he opens the door.

"Morning sunshine." Extremely enthusiastic, she steps forward, dancing in her underwear. "How ya been?"

"Stay right there." Determined to carry this out, he cups her cheeks and—

Kiss her senseless.

That's what I plan to do.

—splat!

Is that… carrot cake? On his face?

Actually, it's pretty tasty but still.

Pinta's a really good cook.

He. Can't. See.

"Whoa, I guess someone was eager for Pinta's patisserie." Laughing, Karin grins, removing the plate (and cake), and observing the mark left on his face. "You know what? I think you look even better with this decoration." Leaning in to lick his cheek, she adds. "Tastier too."

His face burns like the sun erupting into supernova.

And off she skips, into the apartment of Ryou-chan and Zu-kun, ready to beat them till they grovelled and remembered who's boss. Her.

A face palm is both necessary to remind Hitsugaya Toushirou that he's an idiot in the morning and to wipe his face clean.

"Morning Toushirou. I see you already got her greeting." Pinta smirks. "Did you like the cake?"

"It's fan-fucking-tastic." And with that, the morning beauty, the icy dragon, slams the door shut.

"And that is why you don't mess with me, boys!"

… throwing Kurosaki Karin out of the apartment ten seconds later.

Like a ninja.

Bowling is fun. Really.

If you don't count the commentary—

"Kami – how could you miss such an easy shot?"

"You are so awesome, you know that?"

The bargaining with the bowling ball—

"Go left, left I say, I say I say I say! Yay, you went left! I love you!"

"A little bit more to the right – the right, not that – not that way! Why?"

The criticism about your skills—

"Put your soul in it, and aim, dammit!"

"Strike it out, twinkle toes!"

And the lame handshake thing that people get when they have a strike, or half strike.

"Woo."

It has wiggly fingers and bumping fists.

If that doesn't bother you—

"Oh yeah, winner takes us to their favourite pub of choice and pays!"

—then it's a truly wonderful game.

"Drink up, guys!" Karin cheers, later, at the pub, cheeks rosy.

"On three: three!" Four of them cry.

"Kanpai!"

Toushirou sigh, a little hopelessly.

The loser has to stay sober, and drive them back to the apartments.

Karin totally rigged it for him to maintain consciousness.

"So, where'd you go?" Zu-kun slurs slightly.

"Me? Well, I went abroad… to Europe, I think. Good times," Karin replies in reminisce, smiling softly, dimple dancing. "Then, I went back to Karakura—"

"And how was it?" Pinta inquires, head on his hands. "Haven't been there for a while."

"Meh. The usual. Same old, same old." Karin shrugs, one arm around Toushirou. "Ne, Toushirou?"

Slowly, Toushirou nods, his arm around her waist to secure her balance. Apparently, she falls off her chair quite easily when tipsy. It's happened twice already.

"Yeah."

"Alright. Glad to see we're on the same page." The raven haired lady grins. Then frowns. "You guys are coming to wedding, right?"

"Yuzu's? Yeah, totally." Donny nods, eying the yummy bartender. "Wouldn't miss it for the world."

"—and then, then what happened?" Leaning back, she tilts her head in Toushirou's direction, the alcohol making her lose track of her tale.

"You picked me up and we set on our travels to rediscover Japan." Word perfect, the white-haired man recites.

"Thaaaa's right." Karin slurs, fist slamming on the table. "'Cause we're all for looking at beauty in the ordinary."

Ryouhei chuckles. "Time to go, I think."

"Yeah?" Toushirou lifts one eyebrow. "Why?"

"Main rule is to ensure protecting our girl. Especially when she sets her sights on someone. Gotta make sure she doesn't embarrass herself." Kazuya explains, rubbing his eyes slightly. "Though she will, anyways."

"You guys are so loyal." Toushirou comments, agreeing with the sentiment. "Alright, let's go."

"Way… wait jus' a second." Karin stands up suddenly, swaying though her grip remains firm on Toushirou's shoulder. "One more drink. One."

There's a pause.

"It's your call." Pinta shrugs, sipping more of his sake. "Though it's better if you do."

"Alright. Fine." Toushirou acquiesces.

"Just one, though." Donny warns.

"Yay!" She snuggles into him, arms wrapped around Toushirou's neck, the moment lasting far too long.

"Eh?" Karin blinks, maintaining balance only via Toushirou. "What do you mean, you're staying behind?"

"Exactly what it means. Man stuff." Ryou-chan scowls.

"Yeah, but… Shirou's a man, right?" Wobbling, she pokes said person and pulls his hair. "This yummylicious guy has to be a man."

"I am a man." Toushirou growls, though amused at her drunken antics.

"See? He admits it." Karin giggles, face flushed.

"Real men." Zu-kun explains. "He's a wooden boy."

That totally makes sense.

"Okay! Have fun. Make sure you get a taxi – and Toushirou will let you in." Stumbling, she turns to go, Toushirou as her support. "Bye guys."

"Later." The four soccer players mumble, sighing and relaxing into another cup of sake.

The door opens, the door shuts.

And the two sweethearts that never were have left the building.

"So? Who's up for poker?" One of them pipes up.

"We're fucking drunk." Ryouhei grimaces. "You really think we can play it when we don't have a deck?"

"Ah well, we gave them our blessing." Donny shrugs. "They're finally going to make things right."

"… I don't get it."

"What?" Toushirou asks, giving her a sideways glance from the corner of his eye.

"You." Karin says, voice thick, semi-aware that she's stopped moving and Toushirou is dragging her anyway.

"Okay, what about me?"

"Why do you like me? How are you such a great kisser? And why… why didn't you follow me?" Slumping into his warm, and stealing every piece she can get, she waits for his answer with bated breath, as much as she can with her sodden mind.

"Because… you're Karin. I like how you put a sarcastic spin to things and motivate people. I like how you change the flavour of ice cream every single time. I like how you're short and pixie-like with a killer edge. I like how you change the mood and become the life of the party. I like you… because you're you."

"Aw, you're so sweet." And suddenly, she's not by his side but below his head, reaching up, and taking his face and meeting his with hers. Eyes almost glazed, she murmurs against his ear, "I've wanted to do that for so long, Toushirou."

It's tempting.

Kami, it's tempting—

To just take her there and then, never mind about all her friends, never mind about everyone else, it's just—

It's just him and her and the things they should have done so long ago.

But—

But…

… it's just the alcohol talking. It has to be. It must be.

So why would the alcohol lie?

Unless… unless she really wanted to do it.

Lean in—

But the moment is gone.

And she's on the floor, giggling about butterflies and hurricanes that swirl through her.

Damn it.

"Come on. Let's get you to bed." Picking her up, he curses his restraint that should have broken at an earlier date, his arm at her waist, her arm looped round his neck, and moves forward.

Yet Karin, her head lolling and still conscious, is not satisfied. Sluggish thoughts stir through her mouth, not quite as articulate as she prefers.

"You shouldn't."

"Get you to bed?" Toushirou arches one eyebrow. "I think I should."

They both know she wasn't talking about that.

"No… I mean." Gestures fall to the floor, never to be reclaimed, heavy on her hands. "You shouldn't like me."

The apartment door opens.

"Why?"

They make their way through the door, and oh, it's getting ever so hard, ever so hard to…

"Because…"

Shut up. Shut up. Shut. Up. Now.

Don't want to. Let him know. Have to. Let. Him. Know.

But everyone knows, that the heart rules out the mind under a drunken stupor.

"… I killed Rukia."

The world freezes, an icy wonderland.

And she laughs, bitterly, brokenly, not at all amused.

"Car crash, you know? That was us, the other car… though I was the one behind the wheel. I thought I saw her. One last time. Convinced myself that it was someone else. But then… a month later, when I returned to Karakura, I found out that she died. And I knew that I killed her. Well, that taught us a bit of responsibility. Never to go drink driving. Fucking idiots, that's what we were. And then… then I saw her."

Karin slips, stumbling forward onto the sofa, flopping just before it.

"Kami, she was beautiful. Just the same as I knew her before… before I…" She breaks off from the thought. "And so I asked her, if I could do anything for her. One thing. Do you know what she said? Do you?"

Fuck.

Fuck no.

Just shut the hell up—

But she won't.

And he isn't going to stop her.

"She said… to take care of you." Her voice is lower than a whisper, quieter than a mouse as she spills secrets faster than tears can fall. "And I said yes."

She stops, chuckling humourlessly, her voice fading into the silence.

"You were… a job."

Something's broken, smashed into tiny shattered shards, and he just doesn't give a damn.

"A simple, fucking, stupid job."

A laugh.

"That's all."

A smile.

"That's all you were supposed to be."

A tear.

"Bet you don't like me now."

By the time he looks up, digesting the last, last piece of information, she's already asleep.

Shit happens.

No matter what you say, no matter what you do, shit happens.

You can't avoid it, but you can deal with it.

When Karin wakes up, there is a blanket on top of her, wiping away her dried tears.

She doesn't talk, once she remembers what has happened the previous night, cursing under her breath.

She ignores her friends who look at her with sympathetic eyes, brushing away their healing touch, their comforting presence.

Words fail her now.

The door opens, and there he is, face blank and indifferent, and there she is, sitting on the counter, desperately hoping for another cup of coffee.

But not once does Hitsugaya Toushirou take notice of Kurosaki Karin.

And the silence burns between them.