"Forgive me if I'm young
Or speaking out of turn
There's someone I've been missing
I think that they could be
The better half of me."

-Onerepublic

Nate was home. Jenny couldn't wrap her mind around it. He'd been gone for so long that he had become a simple shadow in her mind. When she had seen his face so unexpectedly the bottles of the memories she had of him had exploded, but it was not as painful as the times previous, and she couldn't help but wonder why this was so. It certainly wasn't because she had fallen for someone else; although she and Scott were close, he was more like an older brother figure, a best friend even. And although Scott had introduced her to a couple of his friends at some parties they'd attended during the past two months, she hadn't really fallen for any of them.

Maybe she was over Nate; maybe she was still angry at him for the words he had said the last time they had seen each other. Jenny was still mulling over this the day after Nate's arrival; during lunch she simply stared into her bowl of spaghetti, her mind spinning and tumbling.

"Jenny?" She looked up to see Dan staring at her curiously. "You okay?"

"Y-yeah," she replied too quickly, causing her brother to raise his eyebrows.

"Scott not coming today?" He probed.

"No, he went to visit his family..." Jenny trailed off at the forlorn expression on Dan's face. "What?"

Dan shrugged. "Well honestly, I like the guy. You light up around him, and you've been all confident and stuff since you met him." Dan's eyes narrowed. "You sure you're not in a relationship? It's like he healed you, or something."

Jenny laughed weakly. Sadly this was not the first time she had heard this; everyone from Lily to Chuck had noticed. "He's just a good friend, and I've been needing one of those. I mean, after the Snowflake Ball I felt completely crushed--"

"Wait, what happened then?" Dan's dark eyes widened and Jenny cursed inwardly. She had never told Dan what Nate had said to her at the Snowflake Ball, but she was also surprised the guy hadn't figured it out. Had he never noticed the red eyes Jenny would emerge her room with every morning for about a month after? Jenny's eyes darted to the door, wondering if she could make an escape, and Dan shifted in his seat, noticing the direction her eyes flickered in. Damn. She had no choice but to finally tell him.

Jenny had no choice but to leave the house for the day after that. Five minutes after her story was done, Dan was still cussing out Nate Archibald at the top of his lungs on his cell phone -- and Jenny didn't even want to be there when her brother called up Vanessa. Jenny was actually surprised that Dan was angry with the girl; normally, Dan refused to see his best friend's faults. But when Jenny mentioned that, Dan only seemed to feel worse.

"I'm the worst brother in the world. I'll make it up to you later Jen, promise," stated Dan before she left the loft, cupping his hand over the phone so that Nate couldn't hear his non-threatening, calm, almost apologetic voice. Jenny couldn't help but roll her eyes.

When she walked into Barnes and Noble about an hour later, Jenny still hadn't decided if she was mortified or relieved about Dan's reaction. She was a big girl and she could handle herself, but it also felt good now that Dan finally knew. Oh, she couldn't wait to tell Eric and Jonathan and most especially Scott -- the latter would most likely break into hysterical laughter. An easy smile crossed Jenny's face as she browsed through the books, her eyes finally landing on one in particular. It was about the royal Tudor family of England from many centuries ago, and it reminded her of her conversation with Blair a few months ago, when Blair had told her that she was the brunette's choice for queen.

You have to be cool to be Queen. Jenny recalled Blair's words and touched the headband on top of her head gently.

"Jenny?" A familiar male voice called her name and she looked into the eyes of Nate Archibald, only three feet away.

She sucked her breath in. "Nate," she said nervously. How was it that she always ran into him unexpectedly like this?

His eyes traveled from the headband to the book in her hands. "The Tudors?" He read aloud, raising his eyebrows at her. When she replied tensely that she was studying, Nate looked curious. "I've seen an episode of The Tudors before. What kind of research are you doing, exactly?"

"Not that kind of research!" She exclaimed in reply to his mischievous, teasing facial expression. Why wasn't he angry that Dan had yelled at him?

Nate laughed. "Just checking," he said before his face turned serious. "Look, Jenny... can we talk?" When she nodded he sat down at a table and gestured for her to take the chair beside him. Jenny pushed her chair away from his a little so that there was more space between the two, and she trained her eyes on his face. He was so heartbreakingly beautiful; she could see that even though she was angry with him. And she hadn't seen him in so long. There was nothing wrong with looking, was there? Because there was nothing between them anymore. They were done -- they weren't even friends anymore.

"Dan called me this morning."

"I know..."

"You just told him what happened at the Snowflake Ball?" Nate questioned, not looking at her. Jenny nodded. Nate sighed. "Jenny... I'm sorry."

Jenny stared at him in disbelief. He turned his face to look at hers and he smiled. And he said it again, "I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you the way I did. If I had known... and the things you said to me before I left to Europe... I didn't realize those things. I'm sorry. I guess the night of the Ball I was just so afraid of your rejection that I had to reject you first. And Vanessa was the easy way out."

She was silent for a moment, just looking at him. His eyes were sincere. She smiled at him.

"You know, you were right Jenny. I should have stayed with my internship; I went and asked if I could have it back yesterday. Hopefully I'll get it back."

Jenny's smile widened. "Did Europe help you come to that decision?" She asked curiously, wanting to hear about his experience.

"Actually, yeah. It did. When we went backpacking we went through some areas that were poverty-stricken... it just taught me a lot of about the world. So I don't regret going to Europe at all, if anything, I think it's helped me see that the internship will be good for me. It really helped me realize that a lot of people don't have the privileges that I do, and if anything, I should help them to the best of my ability."

Jenny sat back in her seat, the goofiest of grins on her face. "Nate Archibald, I cannot believe what I'm hearing! That's so great! I'm so proud of you." Nate laughed, and there was that moment again that they had shared in many of their previous moments -- that connection, that spark of inevitable happiness.

"I actually brought you something back, this journal of the fashions and ideas of that Chanel lady. I figured you'd like it," he told her, his blue eyes bright as he leaned forward in his seat. Jenny was too flabbergasted to speak, and Nate backtracked. "Vanessa told me that I should have gotten you the earrings, but--"

"No, no, I love the idea of the book! Oh my gosh Nate, I'll love it so much." She wanted to hug him now, but she refrained, and Nate smiled once more. "How are you and Vanessa?" she asked timidly, not sure if she wanted to hear the answer.

Nate shrugged. "We hooked up a lot, but we're not in a relationship. If anything I think we were just getting on each other's nerves by the end. She actually met some guy in Paris who tagged along with us for a while..." He trailed off, looking like he wanted to say something.

"What?" Jenny asked curiously, pushing her blonde bangs away from her eyes.

"Nothing," he responded. "Just that... you really would have liked Europe. I can see you in Paris one day."

Jenny smiled. "Really?" She was flattered. Jenny was about to ask about Paris when she got a text from her father, telling her to come home. Unwillingly, she got to her feet. "I have to go. I'll see you around."

"Wait, Jenny -- are we friends now? Can we be?"

Jenny looked down at him, her lips tense. With Nate it was hard to know how she felt about him. Finally she sighed and nodded.

"We can try."

Thank you Susan for the idea for this chapter. Also thank you to everyone who reviews. Those reviews inspire me to keep writing this story so keep reviewing!