Feelings of Love & Hate
Naruto wrapped Shoto's arm. He could only wish that the battle could have finished before Kakashi had gotten there so he could tell all that he was a first hand witness to the defeat of Sasuke. He checked the younger boy's arm to make sure he had wrapped it up just right. That windmill shuriken had went pretty deep into his arm, it barely seemed like he should be able to move it without feeling some sort of pain. That was what made Shoto so special to some people that were in his squadron. He was able to take attacks just up until he finished being completely berserk with his anger in battle.
"Naruto?" Shoto gave his childish smile.
"What's up, Sho?" Naruto patted his arm.
"I need to get going. I need to see Sai."
"Were you thinking about him or something?"
"No. I just want to hold him."
"Uh...ok...?"
"I keep forgetting that you're straight. You're not a man lover."
"Well of course I'm not. I just like being close to my friends. You guys just seem to act like I'm supposed to know every thing in your lives, including your love lives. I see why Matthew tries to drown you out sometimes."
"Yeah. His whole thing about being straight gets on my nerves sometimes. Kiba's straight and he listens to me."
"Don't you need to go somewhere?"
"Right. I've got to get to Sai!"
Shoto jumped off the couch. He winced when he moved his sore arm to move his bangs out of his face. He used his left hand to move the unwanted hair. It was going to be a long time before he would be able to use that arm again. He could only hope that he could still go onto missions while he was still hurting.
He walked out of the apartment holding onto his arm. He didn't think that the sun was going to be the bright as it was at that moment. He walked to the tree that was by the building and stood under it. He sat down, holding his arm wishing that the sun wasn't so bright. He was going to hate the rest of the day because of it.
He saw something come to him from the distance. He tilted his head to the side like an innocent child to see if he could figure out who or what exactly it was. He really wasn't in the mood to be bothered with anyone at the moment. He could always fight against whatever it was, but his arm was hurting worse than Sasuke's pride. He would at least try to kick this person's butt if they bothered him while he was trying to allow his arm to heal. After a while it started looking like it was two or three people coming towards him. It really wasn't going to get any better.
"Shoto-kun!!" there was that undeniable voice of Kiba.
"Ki...Kiba?" Shoto's left eyebrow cocked up.
"Yeah. Who else would it be?"
"A figment of my imagination from my loss of blood??"
"Ha. You get funnier everyday!"
Shoto blinked in an attempt to figure out what exactly was going on. It was either, Kiba was getting slower by the day or he really was delusional from his blood loss. That was the last time he waited to get bandages on any wound that was still bleeding like a water fountain. He closed his eyes hoping that all the illusions and other crap going on his head would just go away.
"Shoto-kun, are you alright?" he knew that voice.
"Sai-bear?"
"Yes. I have not seen you all day. I missed you."
"I miss you too. I was actually coming to see you. The light just got too bright for me. So I had to sit down in the shade in order to stop all the brightness."
Sai smiled as he bent down to see Shoto's smiling face. That blond guy from earlier seemed to be pretty eager to learn about him and the way he acted when he liked someone. Sure he was a little confuse by what he meant by liking someone, but if they knew each other then it shouldn't have been that much of a problem. He wondered about the whole story behind the two of them knowing each other besides the mutual friend that they both shared. He supposed that he really didn't need to know about it. Everyone had more than one friend so that meant Shoto had more than one friend as well.
Matthew stood besides Kiba, who was on Akamaru, watching the couple gaze into each other's eyes. He really wasn't trying to understand what was going on, but it seemed like the two were going to kiss regardless of who was around. No matter how much Matthew really wanted to protect the prince, he was not going to stand around and watch him kiss another guy in front of him. That scared him worse than finding out that he was gay and really wanted to be with Genma more than anything else in the world. It felt like just yesterday he was sitting besides the boy using bushes for cover from the rain as they were to go to Konoha by the orders of the king. Now the boy had truly grown up, well his body grew up and not his mind, and he had his own boyfriend that was kind of attractive.
"Sai, I've missed you so much today. I don't know what I would do without you."
"I want to talk to you, Shoto."
Shoto paid no attention as he leaned in to kiss Sai. His yellow eyes closed as he felt Sai's lips touch his and his face being touched by the softest hands there ever had been. He placed his hands in the back of Sai's hair pushing him closer to him to keep him right where he wanted him; that was in the kiss he wanted so badly. He had never in his life felt something that perfect, tasted something that sweet, or smelled something that made even the greatest of perfumes\colognes smell like it was a dumpster filled with really stinky garbage. How could anyone not want to kiss him if they could smell, feel, and taste something like that? He let his tongue brush slightly against Sai's lips. When his tongue slipped through the defenses of his boyfriend's lips and teeth, he knew that he was going to get some later that night. Well that was before he felt a fist to the back of his head that started hurting worse than anything else that he had felt.
He gave a glare to whomever had hit him, which showed it to be both Kiba and Matthew. Did they know how hard it was to actually get a boyfriend in this village nevertheless be able to kiss him without having to hear people's mouths about it? Would someone please tell them that he was trying his hardest just getting Sai to understand his feelings and that kiss might just help with that? He sighed as he turned his whole body around to look at them.
"What could you two possibly want? I was in the middle of a great kiss," Shoto said, annoyed.
"You shouldn't kiss in public. Shino, Matthew, Naruto, and I may be the only ones that really don't care about this, but the other guys might hurt you. And with your temper, you might destroy most of the village instead of fighting them for whatever they say and\or do to you," Kiba smiled.
"Besides all of that, it's pretty gross," Matthew added.
"Would not!!! And me kissin' another guy is not gross!!!"
"Whatever you say."
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Back With Deidara who is sitting on a tree stump outside of Konoha
Yes Deidara was sitting on a tree stump barely outside of the village of Konoha thinking about his beloved Shoto Emerald. That guy from before said that they were boyfriends and that they had been for about a day now. That was something that he wanted all to himself; the title of being Shoto's boyfriend for the rest of their lives. Maybe not his boyfriend for that long, but be the one that he could be besides and know that nothing bad will ever happen again as long as he had him. Those thoughts about him came to a close as he saw two of the familiar Akatsuki cloaks in front of him. He sighed, stood up, bowed, and then sat right back down to finish his thoughts. Shoto was the only person that could keep his attention for longer than twenty seconds at a time.
The two Akatsuki members gave a quick look at each other before turning their eyes back to the blond sitting on the tree stump. It would seem that Itachi wasn't lying when he said that the guy was so far in love that nothing else in all the world mattered to him besides whomever this boy was. They had to do something to get him back to the base and away from the boy before he became emotionless or emo. Like they needed anymore people like that in the Akatsuki.
"Deidara-senpai, are you ok? Tobi worried about Deidara-senpai?" Tobi asked.
"Tobi? That cannot be you," Deidara answered.
"Well it is, Deidara. And so am I," that voice sounded way too much like Sasori.
"Sasori-no danna? I must have fallen asleep. There is no way that you can be working with that brat."
"No. Zetsu was on a mission and could not take Tobi. Apparently finding you was less important than whatever Kisame was doing. That's how I got stuck with Tobi."
"So why are you looking for me?"
"You have been gone for too long. Leader started to worry."
"Ok."
"Deidara-senpai is sick. Sasori-senpai, we should hurry and take him home."
"He's not sick, Tobi. He's in love once again."
"Oh."
Deidara looked at them as if they were talking about Shoto being a complete retard. He wanted to say something back to them, but he just couldn't find the words as he began to think of him again. Once again he was stuck into his little perverted fantasy world that involved him and Shoto and a bunch of other things. There was nothing in his life that meant more to him than that moment and the boy that he wanted more than everything in his life. If he had the choice, he would leave Akatsuki in order to protect him from anything that would possibly harm him in the long run of their lives together.
Tobi, not paying any attention to the warning that Sasori had given him about Deidara's temper, looked at him a little too close for anyone's comfort. He poked the man's forehead in an attempt to get him to pay attention to him. All he wanted was for the guy to pay attention to him ever since he got to be the apprentice of Zetsu.
When the light blue eye of Deidara snapped up with a look of anger, caused Tobi to back up just slightly. He grabbed as much clay as his left hand could grab from his pouch. He threw it at Tobi, barely missing the orange swirled mask that was covering his face. Just a little had exploded at the small contact as the rest blew down three trees that were behind him. No one messed with him when he was thinking about the person he loved more than anything else or when he was thinking about anything in general.
"That's enough, Deidara. Tobi, you apologize for angering him," Sasori said.
"WHAT!!!" They both yelled.
"Like I really want to go home with the two of you trying to kill each other. Leader isn't going to like to see the hideout blown to bits either. And we still have to find the rest of the tailed brats."
"But Sasori-no danna," whined Deidara.
"Sasori-senpai," Tobi said about the same time as Deidara.
"No buts. Now c'mon."
It was only because of the tone that Sasori had said it, that the two put aside their differences with a truce and walked back behind him. It was going to be a real long day for Deidara as he looked back in the general direction of Konoha wishing that he had Shoto by his side instead of Tobi and Sasori. Tobi was as absent minded as ever as he continued walking. And as for Sasori, let's just say that Deidara was not going to like what the puppet master had in store for him once they returned to the base\hideout.
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In Shoto's apartment room with Shoto, Sai, Matthew, Shino, and Kiba
The young silver haired boy, also known as Shoto, was going through his record collection trying to find the perfect song for him to listen to much to the dismay of his company and roommate. Kiba, as usual, was trying to pick a fight with Shino about who was the leader of team 8 even though it has been over a year since they became Chunin and it really didn't matter. Matthew, being the pacifist he was to his friends, was lying upside down on the couch playing the newest handheld game that he actually had enough money for. And that leaves us with Shino, who has only been mentioned up until now. He was paying not attention at all to Kiba but was secretly plotting on a way to give the boy and his dog fleas so he'd shut up every once and a while about being the leader. The four friends were just hanging out like they always did when neither had a mission and Shoto was getting on their last nerves about Genma being adorably cute.
Shoto finally found the record he was looking for. He looked around for his record player only to see that Sai was messing with it for some very odd reason. He walked over to his boyfriend spinning the record on his ring finger while trying his hardest not to smile or laugh at the sight that was before his very yellow eyes. He grabbed the record player from Sai quickly only to find that everyone in the room was staring at him, maybe even deep into his soul. He could have sworn that he heard a record scratch and crickets chirping somewhere near by. Somehow he figured that bringing them all to his place was going to cause some kind of trouble. Everyone always had a problem when he actually wanted to do something that was kind of necessary for his own enjoyment.
He placed his record in the record player and started winding it up so it would play. The song Kimi=Hana by the Pigstars came on along with smiles from the three other boys in the room. He held Sai's hand tightly as he mouthed the song, because he knew for sure that his singing sounded worse than Matthew screaming. He felt so happy for once in the last couple of days. Maybe it was a good thing that Deidara or whatever his name was had him on the date after all he never felt so close to his boyfriend in the whole day that he had known him. Then everything changed. His face, which was full of smiles, turned into a horrible frown. He had actually kissed the blond and was still feeling a little guilty about that even after the two to four hours that had already gone passed.
Sai had seen the frown come from the once happy face from his boyfriend. He tried one of his most fake smiles, but it only seemed to make it a lot worse than what it already was. He was trying to figure out how to help him, but there was nothing that was actually going through his mind. He wondered if he kissed him the way that they had before, if it would make him happy. But as he had most recently found out, kissing another boy was wrong. It was as wrong as stealing from an orphan or a blind person. What else was there for him to do besides kiss him? Everything was starting to confuse him and he was not going to figure them all out at that moment.
"I won't let go of that hand, let go of that hand," Shoto muttered.
"Are you singing, Shoto-kun?" Sai asked, his smile still present.
"I was. I really love this song. I want this to be our song because I feel this way about you, Sai-bear. And I know for certain that you feel the exact same way about me."
"..."
"I do not think that this is a wise idea, Shoto," Shino spoke up.
"Stop being mean, Shino!! He loves me too."
"Stop whining, Sho. It will give us all a headache. I swear," Matthew put his game down.
"What? I', mot whining, Matti-kun!"
"I guess Shoto will never change even if he's got the perfect boyfriend," Kiba sighed.
Shoto grabbed one of his prized katanas off the wall right above him and threw it at the three boys that were sitting on his couch. He jumped up while he was still holding Sai's hand making him get up as well. He, along with his supposed boyfriend, ran into his room as quickly as he had thrown the katana at his friends. That left the other three in a sort of paralyzed state for a couple moments before they realized he was in his room with Sai. Oh yes the conspiracies that they were making that moment would have left even Jiraiya blushing like a schoolgirl.
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Inside the bedroom, Sai sat on the bed staring at the boy standing in front of him with his hands behind his head. He noticed the yellow eyes being wider than he ever remembered them being, which made him wonder what was going through the boy's mind. The way he looked it was almost like that of a mad man. There was one thing that was good about being a member of the ANBU Root program and that was the fact that they could feel no emotions whatsoever. He figured that the emotion that he would feel was something along the line of fear or anything that had to do with being afraid like that.
Shoto jumped on his bed smiling as he landed right besides the teen that he could only love. He ran his hand across the boy's face only wanting to make sure that he loved him the same as he did. Then again he really didn't know if it was really true love and not just that strange really awkward teenager love. He was not going to think about anything other than being right besides Sai and making him happy as well. It was all about making the person he loved as happy as he was in that moment of his life.
Sai grabbed his hand and held it tightly as he looked into Shoto's eyes. How was he going to explain that the strange feelings that the boy was haboring for him was not the same as the ones that he had? He never knew that there was more than one way to be a friend until he read up about boyfriends and girlfriends. That was when everything started to make complete sense too. When he tried to compare the way Shoto acts and the way Shin acted, nothing ever became the same. A kiss on the cheek here, kiss on his lips there, nope they were not the same and he finally realized that.
"Sai? What's up?" Shoto's eyes got bigger.
"Why do you do this, Shoto-kun?" Sai placed his hand on the bed.
"Because I love you. You are my boyfriend after all."
"Why am I your boyfriend?"
"You wanted to be. Remember...I do. I remember it like it was just yesterday."
"We met just yesterday."
"Hush. Like it was just yesterday..."
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Shoto's POV from yesterday
Well if I remember right, I ran into the room to see Lady Tsunade in a really scary hissy fit about not having any sake to drink at all that day. I had just got Genma off me, I swear my charm always get him to come after me like a horny dog to a person's leg (Kiba in the other room says: I heard that, Shoto! Not all dogs do that). So like I grabbed the yellow folder of her desk while trying not to smirk at the love and attention that everyone in the building always show me. It was then that I learned about our mission to catch the Akatsuki and stuff in Amegakure. I punched the palm of my right hand in...um...I can't think of a big word right now, so I punched the palm of my right hand in my excitement. I know that my awesomeness would make everyone afraid and respect me. But I read the paper again and found out that you, Shikamaru, and Kaka-sensei had to come too.
"Milady Tsunade, may I ask who this Sai guy is?" I asked her with my signature shining teeth (insert shiny teeth effect).
"He's standing right behind you, Prince Emerald," she smiled at me.
"Oh. Uh..."
I had turned around to see the most beautiful man ever put into existence by those of the higher plain...plane...I forget. Well anyway that guy was you, Sai. Your eyes bore into mine and I knew that then you and were supposed to be together forever. So I walked over to you with the biggest smile I ever had on my face. I could not help but feel really happy just knowing that I had found my destiny (Matthew is heard snickering then adds his two cents: Neji is so going to kill you for saying destiny. You know how he gets about that word).
"Hello," I said.
"..." you said nothing to me.
"Well I see you don't talk much. It's ok. I like my men kinda' silent."
"Shut up, Shoto. I doubt anyone wants to be near you," Shikamaru came up.
"Fuck you, Shiki. You're mad because I refuse to be with you!!"
"Ha. That's funny."
I grabbed my kunai and placed it at his throat, much like Sasuke had did just forty-five minutes previously. I gave a smirk that said I would kill him if he dared to open his mouth about anything else that he had to say. Please I could mop the floor with him. Hell I could make him wish that he was still in the Academy and not a Chunin trying to start something. Haha startin' something. Sorry, Sai, inside joke.
"Tsunade-sama, working with him is going to be so, troublesome. I mean look at him it's like looking at a gay gorilla."
"Oh shut up!! You're still mad that I am ten times better a ninja than you!!!!"
"Prince Emerald, stop yelling at Shikamaru. Shikamaru, I had to choose him because he's the best ninja in this village. He will be the greatest asset for a mission to Amegakure, even if it is just a scouting mission," Tsunade glared at him.
"But Tsunade-sama..."
"But nothing. I expect you to get along with him for the sake of the mission and because the two of you plus Sai and a certain Jounin are to be teammates."
"This is going to be way too troublesome."
So instead of me being me and kicking his ass like hell, I just stood besides you in awe of your awesomeness. He looked out the window just so he can see the clouds. I mean c'mon, who looks at clouds? A ninja should always be ready to fight and other awesome stuff like that (Kiba: Will you shut up about all this awesome crap. You aren't awesome, you suck). Shut up, Kiba! It's not funny unless Sasuke says something stupid like that. But like anyway, I was thinking in my head of how to make you say something. I knew that you weren't going to say anything because of your emoness and other things that will cause you to not talk because you are so awesome.
Kakashi jumped through the window reading his new Icha Icha book. I don't like it. It is so not right. Oh yeah, Kakashi came in to the mansion and stuffy like that. I was so happy to see him that I ran and glomped him like a girl to a really attractive rock star or like Sakura-chan to Sasuke for some odd reason. It took him a few minutes to get my grip off him. I'm like a pit-bull, once I grab on I don't let go (Mathew: GAY!!!). Will you shut up? As I was trying to say, I was on Kaka-sensei before he pushed me off with that awkward smile of his. Yeah I know that he keeps that mask on so it's like you can't see his face, but I know when he smiles. I get this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach that makes me smile too.
"Kaka-sensei," I rubbed my face against his chest.
"Shosho-kun, has Lady Tsunade decided to allow you to come on a mission with me?" Kakashi asked.
"Of course. I am the best."
"What's the mission?"
"We are going to Amegakure to find out if the Akatsuki is really hiding out there and if they are we are going to come back here and let them know about it and stuffy like that."
"Say what?"
"It is our only choice, Kakashi," Tsunade said.
"No. Why am I here? He can handle this on his own. Shoto is the best ninja in Konohagakure...no the entire ninja world. And Shikamaru and this guy shouldn't be here either."
"Well I feel a little safer with you guys. What if I get jumped, not like I really will, I can always have backup."
"Stuck up!" Shikamaru shook his head.
I said nothing but continued to look at you and all. Shikamaru, Kaka-sensei, and Tsunade started arguing over me. So I didn't care about anything like that. I was happy knowing that I was around you because I would not have been quiet standing there listening to them talking about me like I was nothing. Stupid Shikamaru always tripping and stuff.
"Hello again Sai."
"..."
"You are in the ANBU? Man you gotta' be strong. I'm still a Genin."
"Well yes I am strong."
"Wow, you have a voice?"
"I believe that I do."
"Kawai!!" (Insert my fangirl scream cuz I'm that cool)
"Um...uh...ok?"
"Be my boyfriend."
"A boyfriend?"
"Yeah my boyfriend. You know kissing and stuff."
"Well ok. Only because you are as cute as I am and I know for certain that our lives will not be good without having one another."
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Back to Reality
Shoto smiled as he held Sai's hand once again. Sure he may have exaggerated a bit on how they first met and said that they wanted to be boyfriends, but that shouldn't have bothered him at all. He just told the story plain and simple since it was what had happened in his own twisted little mind. And when we say sick twisted little mind, we mean a mind that is filled with more graphic sex scenes, bloodshed, and other things that shall not be listed because he is a somewhat crazy child.
Sai didn't know whether to run at the moment or try to stick everything out like the best friend he was supposed to be. He had to know that he was not into guys the way that he was thinking. When he felt himself get kissed on the lips once again he knew that Shoto was either dense or really didn't care that he didn't feel the same way. He wrapped his arms around his body when he felt his tongue enter his mouth. He didn't know if he was doing right or wrong because it felt so right but it was so wrong from what he had read.
When he felt himself being pushed back on the bed was when he knew that the final straw had been breached and that he had to do something real soon before anything happened. He really didn't do anything as he felt the slightly taller boy get on top of him. Now everything was getting extremely weird for him and he really didn't know what to do about any of it. He really didn't care anymore, it was feeling just right and he would kill anyone that would stop it before he completely got used to it. He would make sure that it never happened again after all this had happened at this exact moment.
"Sai, you're tensing?" Shoto broke their kiss.
"I'm ok, I believe," Sai answered.
"Alright, baby."
Shoto softly kissed his neck before returning to his lips. With this being the farthest he ever been with a guy, he didn't know whether or not to continue kissing him or to try to undress him to play with him. He decided to run his hands under his pants and played with the organ that was already standing on end. He gace a slight moan into the older boy's mouth after he unzipped his vest and played started pinching and slightly twisting his nipples. He pulled back slightly before kissing his neck once again. He was stroking the length slowly up and down. The moans he was hearing was exciting him even more. This was all coming at him pretty quick because he was still unused to it as he was still a virgin. He just had to continue doing this. He really needed the release from all the stress and the extreme love.
The door was being banged on like there was no tomorrow. Shoto glared at his door hoping that which ever one of his friends that it was would go away for a very long time. When it became apparent that it was not going to happen, he let go of his grip on his boyfriend and stormed over to it with a glare that said he wanted everyone to die. He opened the door to see Sasuke standing right there while Matthew, Kiba, and Shino were still on the couch looking at them. The two were giving each other glares that were rivaling each other.
"Sasuke," Shoto growled.
"Shoto," Sasuke said.
"What is it?"
"I want to speak with you."
"After what you did to my fuckin' arm. I will kick your ass for this!"
"I really don't give a fuck about that. I just need to talk to you."
"What is it? You got three minutes."
"Can we go somewhere private?"
"Fine."
Sasuke left out the apartment room still holding that glare that he came in with. Shoto looked around at the people in the room and back at Sai who was in the bedroom stroking himself. He really didn't want to leave him like that and he didn't trust them all in his apartment like that. He was so going to kill Sasuke for screwing up his love life like that. He was getting ready to get a score but he had to leave.
"Matthew, watch the place," Shoto sighed.
"Sir, yes sir!" Matthew mocked saluted.
"Sai-bear, I'll be back!!!"
"Ok, Shoto-kun," Sai moaned.
Shoto zipped his vest back up before he ran out the door following Sasuke into his doom and still plotting on how to truly kill him for messing up his whole day. He ran back into the apartment and got one of his katanas and started out the door once again. He saw Sasuke right outside the apartment building and gave a small smirk. The two started walking to wherever he deemed as a private place. Yeah, he was so going to die/