Chapter 6: Paralyzed

"Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean." - Maya Angelou

Mr. Bennet's estate was entailed to male heirs, and unfortunately he did not set it aside from his income, which meant that Elizabeth would not inherit from it. But, because there was not an heir, the house would be put in auction as the attorney of her father had informed her the day when they passed away. Yes, indeed, that was the day when she realized that besides their death, she had to face the cruelty of the world alone, with no inheritance at all.

Mr. Kidney, the attorney who was always so kind to her, had only one thing to suggest, to become totally dependent on someone else, and in this case, to the Darcy family, their "closest" relation. She really had no choice, it was that or complete poverty, but in both cases with no dowry at all. If she would pick the second, she would probably be forced to work as a governess or in the worst-case scenario, as a maid. She would be forced to drop every dream she ever had and every chance of being happy in the future. So, taking his advice, Elizabeth wrote a letter to her estranged cousin, asking him to stay with him.

She did not want to remember such things, especially that part of her past, which she tried to forget. They were painful memories, and somehow they always seemed to survive, no matter how hard she tried to bury them. She was laying on bed, when the face of her father caused her to remember all these dreadful memories.

It was the first time of her life, that particular moment - as she remembered all these- when she realized why her mother wanted her to get married. Then, the words of Georgiana came to her mind, when she confessed her that Darcy had insisted upon her staying. 'Could he truly be so kind and generous? He must be!'

Elizabeth felt ashamed of her bad thoughts about him, all those dreadful assumptions she had created. "How despicably I have acted," she cried "I, who have prided myself on my discernment. I, who have valued myself on my abilities! I, who have often disdained the generous candor of myself and gratified my vanity in useless or blamable mistrust! How humiliating this discovery! Yet, how just a humiliation! Had I have been in love, I could not have been more wretchedly blind. But, vanity and not love had been my folly. Till this moment I never knew myself"

Elizabeth Bennet was lovely, clever and she conversed brilliantly. She was witty, she possessed a sharp tongue and her spontaneous honesty was admired. She was a woman with sense and sensibility and she certainly exerted a magnetic pull on everyone -or at least on me.' Yes, these were the thoughts of Darcy's as he lay on bed, trying to sleep. But, every time he closed his eyes, one of her virtues popped out of his head, causing him to awaken. How could such a creature torture him so excessively?The evening was an utter disaster. Maybe not all the night, but at least half of it. He never believed that a woman could cause him such distress, making him unable to breathe. He never, not once in his life had felt such agony.

But, that sentiment was not the only one, which overwhelmed him. Jealousy was. He was not envious of anyone; because he already had what he desired and if he did not, he could easily get it. He was not jealous of his cousin, he was jealous of the advantage he had with her. Elizabeth would be in his arms, he would be able to touch her waist, smell her perfume and have her body almost touching his. But, despite that, Darcy felt blessed for he had made a progress with her. She allowed him to call her by her Christian name and she seemed to have such a positive attitude towards him; as though she cared for him. 'But why do I even care?' he asked himself and as soon as he realized it, he opened his mouth from the amazement.

The next morning, Elizabeth was late for breakfast, but assuming that Georgiana was still asleep, she paced slowly towards the dinning room. But before she decided to enter, she heard some voices from the inside. It was the colonel with his cousin, talking. Elizabeth was about to knock, warning them that she would enter, but she froze as she heard her name. Instead of doing what she had decided, she stood there.

"What do you think? She is really handsome, is she not?" the colonel asked.

"She is tolerable, I suppose. Not handsome enough to tempt me," Darcy replied with his usual indifference. But he lied, of course he lied. After all, what he was supposed to say? "Do not tell me that you are taken with her?"

"What if I am?"

Darcy laughed. "Do be serious, Richard. She is a woman of no consequence; no connections and she has no dowry that could tempt anyone. She does not fit in the description of an accomplished lady. What happened to your better judgment?" As he finished his speech, his heart stopped. Did he really say those things? Yes, indeed he did. He was sorry for mentioning such cruel things, but none of them was a lie. Darcy did not lie.

It took the colonel one minute to respond, but it did not matter really, because Elizabeth could hardly breathe. She walked away from the door and stood in the middle of the hall; not sure where to go. She could not even think. And without knowing where to go, she decided to take a walk. A long one.

As Elizabeth stepped into the house, she found the whole party in front of her. She froze as she saw them looking at her strangely. She looked down on herself, just to see that her gown was covering her body in an improper manner. She was soaking wet and as she was about to speak, she coughed instead.

"Are you alright?" the colonel grabbed her by the shoulders as she stood there, dripping.

"Yes," she simply replied, offering him a weak smile.

"Let us…" He left his sentence unfinished as he quickly took his coat off and placed it on her shoulders.

"Dearest Elizabeth, I was so worried," Georgiana said and touched her hands. Elizabeth smiled to her with lips that were purple from cold and she felt her hands trembling.

"Darcy, send for the doctor immediately!" The colonel demanded as he tightened his coat around her. "She is freezing!" But, Darcy did not move an inch, for he could not feel his legs.

"You are such a gentleman, Colonel. What shall we do, once you are gone?" Elizabeth said as she looked at Darcy coldly. He froze. "I am perfectly fine. You should not distress the doctor for me, Mr. Darcy." His heart stopped as his heard his full name, as he realized that she had preferred to call him in that formal manner. But, she had promised to leave formality behind, but obviously she could not. Was she mad that he seemed not to care for her, at all?

Georgiana led Elizabeth upstairs and helped her get cozy and warm. She explained to her that she had lost the track of time, claiming that she wanted to admire the countryside, that it's beauty overwhelmed her, so she forgot to return home soon. And when, she intended, it started to pour and she was forced to wait under a tree, until it was over. Immediately, the ladies heard a knock and the gentlemen stepped in.

Darcy sat on the couch, without saying anything and the colonel approached her, taking her hand in his. Darcy could barely feel his heart beating, for he was too worried and embarrassed and as he saw his cousin's hand touching hers, he felt that sentiment again, which troubled him the previous night. The colonel asked for her health again and she kindly responded that he did not need to worry. After couple of minutes, Georgiana excused herself, claiming that she would be back soon, bringing Elizabeth a warm nightgown, which could keep her warm. The colonel as well left, saying that he had to inform the cook, to prepare Elizabeth a meal. She was now alone with him.

Elizabeth looked at him intensively, waiting for him to say something. "We were worried."

"I had lost the track of time and then..." She paused to think, "it started to rain."

"I hope of your speedy recovery," he spoke, trying to lighten her spirits.

She laughed, "Yes, your cousin will make sure of that. He seems so caring" she paused "and Georgiana as well."

No, she did not referred to him. He heard it well. He only said it about his sister and his cousin, but she was unjust. He did care for her; deeply. She indeed, was angry at him. A frown created on his forehead as he let his jealousy thoughts run through his mind as he imagined his cousin with her waltzing. "Stop flirting with him, Elizabeth!" He was hurt.

She froze. It was the first time he had said her name and it sounded heavenly. She could not take her eyes off him, but as soon as she realized what he was implying, an angry expression was created on her face. "Flirting?"

"Yes, indeed. That is what you are doing since the time he arrived."

She could not believe her eyes. She opened her eyes just to respond, but she closed them immediately. She did not want to say something that could hurt him, but she could not simply act as though she was not offended, because she was.

"Oh I see..." she replied angrily, almost yelling "Besides tolerable, unaccomplished and inferior" she paused "I am now a wanton, am I not?"

His eyes widened, as he realized his foolishness. "I..." he tried to speak, but he could not. He opened his mouth a couple of times, but he closed it as soon as he opened it. He looked down on the floor, not able to face her.

"I think you should leave."

He obeyed.

Someone wanted to know what Elizabeth's inheritance was and after a little research I made about dowry and stuff, I portrayed her condition. I am sorry I had not given you a clear image of her status in society. I hope that things are clearer now. In this chapter, I wanted to pay my attention to the plot and not so much on their expressions and feelings, though I did make a little effort in the beginning. But their sentiments about the last scene would be expressed on the next chapter. Be patient!

Well, I have some other news to tell you. No more mistakes! I found a beta and she is the loveliest of all. I want to thank her for helping me, you are amazing! I hope that you can read my story and not get distracted from my mistakes.

Do not forget to review!