Chapter 53: You volunteered us for a mission?
I returned to the Control Room two hours later, only to discover that every effort to dial in to Midway had proven useless, even though Rodney should have fixed things with his redirect crystal. Either the Pegasus Gate on Midway was in use or somehow it had been disabled so that we couldn't dial in. I was concerned but not worried ... it wasn't unusual for things to take longer than expected to fix, even for the great Rodney McKay.
Having nothing constructive to do left us waiting for them to send word to us, either directly or via Earth. That approach took us another couple of hours into the night with no news ... that's when my worry began to escalate.
At that point Sam decided the use of ZPM power was worth it and dialled Earth directly. The fact that I'd been pacing around the Control Room since I'd returned, getting more and more agitated with every minute that passed without word had nothing to do with that ... although perhaps there was a slight smidgeon of taking pity on me in her decision.
"Stargate Command this is Atlantis," Sam announced once the connection was established. "What's your status?"
"It's good to hear from you," General Landry said with evident relief. "We feared Midway had been destroyed when we didn't hear back immediately."
"We're not using the Intergalactic Bridge Sir," Sam admitted with a concerned look around the Control Room. "We sent through a strike force, led by Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay, a couple of hours after the malfunction occurred. When we didn't hear anything from Midway and we couldn't establish a lock I decided a direct dial in was warranted. What happened Sir?"
"The Wraith sent through a stun device to the SGC," General Landry reported. "Knocked us all unconscious and sent the whole facility into lockdown. A number of Wraith managed to make it through ... who knows what they could have done if Ronon and Teal'c hadn't come through after them. As it stands, all the Wraith are accounted for with minimal injury on our side."
"That's a relief Sir," Sam replied. "Ronon and Teal'c had no idea what was happening on Midway?"
"No," General Landry said seriously. "We've tried to contact them also with no success. The Daedalus is on its way there but it'll be two weeks before they arrive even pushing the hyperdrive engines. At the very least we have to assume the gate bridge has been damaged – with any luck Doctor McKay is working on fixing it as we speak and we'll hear from them before the Daedalus gets there."
"Let's hope so Sir," Sam responded as positively as she could manage. "We'll check in a week from now. Atlantis out." Motioning for Chuck to cut the connection she turned to Teyla and I with a frown. "Not the news we were hoping for," she commented grimly.
"We could take a Jumper out there," I proposed hopefully. "Gate to the last Stargate in the network and then sublight the rest of the way."
"You're still looking at more than a week's travel," Sam pointed out. "You won't get there much before the Daedalus and if things are worse than just a disabled Gate it won't be soon enough to help them."
"We should still try," I argued. "I'm happy to spend the time and what's the harm? The Wraith would be long gone now their doorway to Earth isn't working anymore."
"Unless they're still there trying to fix it," Sam said reluctantly. "I don't want to think that's the case any more than you do because it means we've lost our people but I have to consider the possibility."
"We can go in cloaked, check it out first," I persisted. "And if they manage to fix things while we're en route you can get them to leave us a message of some kind so we'll know what happened when we get there." Sensing that Sam was weakening I resorted to pleading. "Please let me do this."
Sam thought for a moment, focussing on me with an assessing look as she worked through the pros and cons. "Okay," she agreed finally. "Major Lorne can lead the mission. Load up the Jumper with enough supplies to get you there and back, just in case."
"Thank you," I felt my spirits lift now I was doing something to help find John and the others.
oOo
Major Lorne found me while I was checking existing supplies in Jumper two.
"You volunteered us for a mission," he commented from the open hatch.
"Do you mind?" I asked, thinking that maybe he was annoyed I hadn't spoken to him first.
"Of course not," Evan replied with a frown. "I'm just ... concerned about what we might find. Are you sure you want to be along for that? I'll still be leading the mission even if you want to sit this one out."
"I appreciate the offer but the sooner I know the better," I replied firmly. "I've been running all the possibilities through my head – I need the distraction, need to do something."
"All right," Evan agreed simply. "Make sure we've got enough to see us there and back. Add in a return trip with a maximum load just in case we ..." he trailed off without saying it.
"When we find survivors," I finished it for him with a confident nod. "I'll see to it."
oOo
And then we were away, having committed ourselves to a long and tedious trip with an uncertain conclusion.
Nothing of note happened during the journey ... in fact the four of us deliberately didn't talk about the reason we were out there. We could have been going to a barn dance for all the evident attention we gave to the mission objective. On the surface anyway ... I didn't know about my team mates, but every spare watt of my mental energy was going into alternating between praying we'd find John, Rodney and the others alive and trying desperately not to think about it at all.
Almost two weeks later we arrived at the location of the Midway Station.
Only it wasn't there anymore. Instead we found enough floating debris, spread out over a vast area, to account for it's whereabouts. Given two weeks of inertial movement from the point of origin it told a grim story about the fate of the station.
"There was an explosion," Evan confirmed, checking the readings on the sensors. "Could have been the self destruct though – it would have been the easy way to make sure the Wraith couldn't keep sending more troops through."
"Then where is everyone?" I couldn't help the quiver in my voice. Parker and Brown both made as if the view screens in their seats behind pilot and copilot were the most interesting things in the entire galaxy, leaving Evan to look after me.
"I'll start scanning sector by sector," Evan tried to reassure me. "If they used the Jumper as an escape pod it might take a while to locate them."
"We all know there were too many of our people on that station to fit in one Puddle Jumper," I said, despairing of finding John alive and well. "I ah ...," I took a shuddering breath, trying to reign in my emotions. "I need to ...," I gestured vaguely to the back section, quickly making my way there and slamming the bulk head closed behind me.
And then I just let go, sobbing violently for John, convinced that this time I wasn't going to get that lucky reprieve. I don't know how long I checked out for but I was staring fixedly at the wall opposite me when Evan reopened the bulkhead.
"Sabina," he said gently. "We just picked up an incoming ship on long range sensors. It's the Daedalus – they'll be here in half an hour."
"Anything on the scans?" I asked blankly, carefully not making eye contact. "Communications?"
"Not so far," Evan replied. "We've still got a bit of ground to cover. It'll go faster with the Daedalus here – their equipment is much stronger than the Puddle Jumper's. We'll keep going until they get here and then we'll dock, fill them in on the sectors we've already searched."
"Okay," I turned away, resuming my examination of ... nothing.
"Don't give up," Evan said softly before leaving me to my solitude.
The Daedalus arrived and Major Lorne flew us into the F302 bay. Ronon was waiting when we opened the back hatch.
"Have you guys picked up any signs of Sheppard or the others?" Evan asked him as soon as we stepped out of the Jumper.
"We will," Ronon looked at me when he made that promise and I tried to borrow something from his conviction.
"It's good to see you're okay," I told him in a low tone, letting him pull me in for a comforting hug.
"They're out there," Ronon assured me.
I couldn't respond, just nodded quickly, and then followed the others to the Bridge.
oOo
An hour later the Daedalus finally found something. It was Midway's Puddle Jumper but when Colonel Caldwell called them on the radio there was no response.
"Bring it into the 302 Bay," Caldwell ordered.
I kept up with Ronon's long strides as we both rushed down there. I couldn't think why John wouldn't have answered the Daedalus' hail but finding something was still better than nothing at all.
Ronon hit the external hatch controls and we both stepped back, waiting to see what we'd find inside. It only took a micro second for me to realise that John wasn't amongst the people inside the back section.
"Rodney!" I pushed past the other occupants, grabbing his shirt front and demanding information impatiently. "Where's John?"
"Forward section," Rodney turned and hit the button to open the bulkhead. Everything inside me leapt when I saw John slumped in the pilot's seat. He'd swivelled the chair so he could use it and the seat behind as a make shift recliner. He was actually sleeping, headphones over his ears!
"Oh God," I leant against the wall unsteadily. "I thought ...," I trailed off with a desperate look at Rodney.
"He lasted about a day," Rodney explained. "Sealed himself in there."
Wordlessly I pushed away from the wall and hugged Rodney quickly, letting him go just as quickly hoping he'd know I was glad to see him alive too.
"Wh-where are we?" Bill Lee asked in disbelief.
"Daedalus 302 Bay," Ronon replied. "We saw you, we scooped you up; we're heading back to Atlantis."
"Thank God!" Peter Kavanagh exclaimed. It was petty but I couldn't help but think if that guy had survived and John hadn't there would have been no justice in the world. It was already clear from the small numbers present that we'd lost a number of people on Midway, most of those on the teams John had chosen for the mission.
"Midway was destroyed," Rodney told us.
"Yeah, we saw," Ronon glanced in at John and then back to me. "No wonder he didn't hear the radio call - you gonna wake him up?"
"What?" I realised I'd just been staring at John and blushed in embarrassment. "Of course I'm going to wake him up!"
Moving forward I stopped by John's chair and contemplated how best to do that. "Look away gentlemen," I joked before straddling John's legs and leaning down lightly on his chest.
John shot to wakefulness as soon as he felt my weight, dropping his feet to the floor. His eyes locked with mine and in that instant he pieced together everything he needed to work out how I could be there. He said nothing, just ripped his headphones off and then threaded his fingers through the back of my hair, pulling me into him and kissing me urgently.
I kissed him back, not even caring if Ronon and Rodney were still there or not.
"God I missed you," John pulled back to look at me intently. "I would have anyway but two weeks stuck in a Jumper with those guys? I swear if I hadn't locked myself in here I would have taken a stunner to the lot of them ... repeatedly."
"Even Rodney?" I quipped, grinning because I was just so damn happy to be sitting there in his lap looking at his beard roughened face.
"Okay, maybe not Rodney," John allowed. "Not that I'm not very happy to see you but, how'd you get here?"
"Gated as close as we could and then did almost two weeks of my own in Jumper Two with Lorne and the others," I explained simply. Remembering how I'd felt only an hour before my lips quivered and I could feel tears welling into my eyes. "We didn't know what had happened to you ... then we got here and there was no trace of you. Oh John, I really thought ...," I swallowed hard, looking at him miserably.
"I'm sorry," John settled me into his arms so my head was resting on his chest. "But it wasn't by choice. The Wraith booby trapped the Gate – when we shut it down to stop them sending through more reinforcements it triggered the self destruct. Rodney couldn't shut it off in time so we were forced to abandon the station."
"You survived," I affirmed gratefully. I hugged him tightly for a time before reluctantly stirring myself. "I'm sure you want to get out of here and Colonel Caldwell probably wants an update too."
"Duty calls," John acknowledged, helping me off his lap and then standing up beside me. "Let's get it done then so we can have a proper reunion."
"Now you're talking!" I grinned, desperate feelings forgotten for the time being.
oOo
Of course Ronon passed his interview with the IOA based solely on the impressive performance he'd given in ridding the SGC of Wraith. Teyla and I passed as well, both of us agreeing that Ronon had gotten off easily in the whole scheme of things.
It wasn't until we we'd been back on Atlantis for a couple of weeks that I found out just how close I'd come to losing John. We were sitting in the Mess at dinner and Rodney was ribbing John about something that had happened that day.
"Well at least you didn't make me vent the atmosphere this time," Rodney returned one of John's comments jokingly.
"When did he do that?" I asked curiously.
"Didn't he tell you?" Rodney asked, suddenly serious. "On Midway when the Wraith were about to overrun us. John ordered me to vent the air even though he wasn't at the Puddle Jumper. I seriously thought I'd killed him. I don't know how he did it but somehow he managed to get himself into one of the spacesuits before he completely ran out of oxygen."
"Something you forgot to tell me?" I raised an eyebrow at John in annoyed disbelief.
"I was just too happy seeing you again," John tried to go the charming, flatterer path.
"You are in big trouble mister," I got up, held out a hand to him imperiously and ordered "on your feet soldier."
"Yes Ma'am," John kept a straight face with difficultly, more than amused by my attempt at being stern and commanding. "Sorry guys," he said to his team, grabbing my hand and assisting me in pulling him from his chair. "Looks like we're leaving now."
"Have fun," Ronon smirked.
oOo
"I can't believe you didn't tell me about that," I said in all seriousness, moving to gaze out the window once we were back in our room.
"You were already too upset thinking I'd died when the station blew up," John came up behind me and put his hands on my shoulders. Resting his chin on top of my head he sighed. "I couldn't make it any worse by telling you all the details."
"I get that," I turned into him and looked up with a frown. "But what about after? We were on the Daedalus for almost two weeks!"
"I suppose I wanted to avoid just this reaction," John admitted honestly. "I didn't have any choice you know and I didn't make the decision to give that order to Rodney lightly. Thinking of how you'd find a way to make me pay if I didn't make it spurned me to push myself when I thought I couldn't go any further."
"You wouldn't be the man I love if you'd done anything different," I acknowledged, sighing as I added, "although you do make that role very difficult at times."
"No more than you these days," John pointed out. "So, what's my punishment for leaving out some of the details?"
"Well ...," I smiled as I insinuated my hands under his shirt and ran them up his back. "You could show me some of the upside of being Mrs Sheppard."
"You mean this?" John wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted me easily. I felt the muscles rippling in his back as he turned and carried me over to our bed, gently settling me to sit on the edge. Kneeling down before me he unlaced and removed each of my boots in turn.
"This is a good start," I murmured, running my hands through the scruffy hair I loved so much. Leaning into my caresses John rested his forehead against my stomach for a moment before grinning up at me.
"Got any other orders?" he joked.
"Give me everything you've got," I locked eyes with his deeply, ignoring the joke as I demanded what I wanted.
"Sabina," John made my name a solemn caress, rising up to kiss me deeply. I reciprocated with the intensity of emotion bubbling away inside me. There was nothing really different about that night compared with any of the others we'd shared together. And yet I couldn't deny the heightened connection ... the zing of compatible Lantean genes feeding backwards and forwards between the two of us along with the unexplainable edge that was just the inherent chemistry of 'John and Sabina' together.
I didn't register the logistical moves to get us from fully clothed to naked ... John was a master at that part of the journey, never breaking the mood with the practicalities. But I jolted when it was just us, skin to skin from head to toe.
"John," I moaned as he shifted against me, making everything fuzzy around the edges so that I could focus only on him.
He pulled out all the stops, getting me so worked up with desire that I was desperate and pleading with him to finish it before he'd even made the two of us into one. When that moment came I didn't try to stop the emotional tears from marking tracks across my face. That I could do that, be overcome with emotion and feel comfortable revealing it, showed how far I'd come from the Sabina who'd shared similar moments with John that first time three years before.
I felt the release in every part of myself, felt him at the very core of me. He was murmuring endearments and telling me how much he loved me during his own release ... it was intense and beautiful, the same and yet different as well.
"Wow," I was boneless and relaxed beyond belief when I came back down to Earth in the aftermath. "Where did that come from?"
"I have no idea," John said languidly, "but give me an hour or so and I'll see if I can stage a repeat performance."
"An hour huh?" I smiled, pressing a kiss to his chest before resting my head against his shoulder. "Ambitious."
"You asked for everything," John reminded me. "If you can still move in the morning then I haven't delivered."
"Now you're just bragging," I laughed outright, wanting nothing more than to gather him up and hold him close forever.
"We'll see," John spoiled that one by yawning tiredly. We were both still smiling as we settled down to sleep.
Authors Note:
I spent some time considering whether the Midway Puddle Jumper would have some kind of distress beacon to alert rescuers to its position in space. Ronon says they 'saw' the Jumper which sounds to me like they didn't ... I decided to take that angle because it made for a better reunion sequence, even though really an escape pod should have had both a beacon and a proximity alarm so they'd get rescued easier and know when their rescuers were close by!
Next Up? Fortunate Journey Season 4 Chapter 54