*Here's the much awaited update! I would have updated yesterday but it was prom night. Better late than never though! I want to thank all the new followers and favorites to my story. I hope you all enjoy it and continue to read until the end.*
Amy POV:
Oh no. That can't be right. Lily wouldn't do that...would she? There's no way that was a memory. I needed to get out of here. I gather my remaining belongings quickly before I remember Karma is still here. I look up into curious eyes. She's looking at me like I'm a wounded animal and I don't particularly like it. I sigh before explaining,
"I just need to be at home right now." She nods slowly in mock understanding.
"I understand but Amy?" I fight back the tears that are threatening to fall as I reply,
"Yes?"
"I-I..." I wait for the rest but she just sighs.
"Never mind. Let's get you home."
I nod again and give her a small, fake smile. She opens the door and I follow her to the elevators. When one finally comes and we both step in I feel my heart drop into my feet. What am I gonna say to Lily? Should I confront her or pretend I'm not starting to remember? I wanted this to work but it doesn't seem like that's possible given the circumstances. The feel of Karma's fingers interlocking with mine draws me out of my muddled state. I glance over at her and idly wonder what it would be like if she was holding my hand for real. I mean, in the way that I want her to hold my hand, like I'm the only thing keeping her from floating away. Because that's the way I'm holding her hand. She glances at me out of the corner of her eye and winks at me. I smile for real this time and allow myself the simple pleasure of holding my fake girlfriend's hand while silently wishing it was like this all the time. When we reach the bottom floor I'm already mentally preparing myself for her to let go of my hand but to my surprise, she doesn't. I smile internally loving every moment of it but pretend I'm not by placing what I'm hoping is a casual look on my face. We walk all the way to the parking lot like this. When I spot Lily's car I let go of her hand before she can break my heart even more by letting go first. She smiles but it doesn't reach her eyes. I meet her stare and once again she's pulling me in for a hug.
"I love you Amy Raudenfeld. Don't you ever almost die on me again or I'll kill you myself." I laugh against her shoulder to keep from crying.
"It must have been my bad karma." I joke. She laughs a real Karma laugh at that one and I mentally pat myself on the back. Oh how I love that sound.
"Call me right when you get home so I know you made it there in one piece okay?"
"Okay" I repeat in agreement. She releases me but not before placing a searing kiss that lingers on my cheek the whole drive home. The things this girl does to me. I mentally sigh. Lily doesn't say much on the drive but when she reaches over and laces our fingers together I don't feel like she's holding me to earth. It feels like nothing really. I needed to talk to her about what I remembered at the hospital though so I invite her in. She accepts and opens my door for me when we arrive. She also takes my bags from me and holds my hand on the short walk from the car to my front door. She follows me to my room and I open the door and motion for her to come in.
"Make yourself at home." She smiles and sets my bags down before laying on my bed. It's going to be hard thinking straight with her laying there looking desirable.
"Lily?" Her name comes out as a hushed whisper but she somehow heard me and is looking at me when she replies.
"Yeah babe?" I blush a little at this term of endearment. I like the way that sounds and I find myself briefly imagining what it would sound like coming from Karma's mouth.
"I remembered something earlier..." I trail off waiting to see if she's going to latch on to the fact that what I remembered was about her or if she's going to play it off like nothing happened. I'm both shocked and happy when she more states than asks,
"It was about when you saw me and Lauren, wasn't it?" I nod my head since my mouth if currently unable to form coherent sentences.
"I should explain. Okay look, I know you think Lauren is a terrible, evil, fire-breathing dragon whore from the pits of hell,"
"Couldn't have said it better myself." I mumble.
"But, what you don't know is that she has a sweet side. I know you're probably not going to believe me when I say this but she was actually helping me. This is embarrassing but I guess I have to tell you the truth. I live in shelter from time to time. Or my car when the weather is bad. Whenever I can't find a couch to crash on or a motel that I can afford I go there. One day I was there and she was one of the volunteers and she was so nice to me. She promised not to tell anyone and I guess we got kinda close over time and I came to trust her more so naturally I told her about my huge crush on you and that same day we met up at Shane's party and things went way better than I could have ever hoped for so I asked her for help. I wanted to go on that date with you but money has been an issue for me as you can assume. So Lauren was loaning me some money so I could pay for our date and I just wanted to impress you so-" I cut her off with my lips. It only takes her a moment to realize what's happening before she's reciprocating. She reaches out and pulls me onto her. I let out a small whimper at the pressure on my still bruised ribs. We both end up laughing and I roll off her and onto the side that doesn't hurt. I'm facing away from her but she scoots closer and big spoons me. I smile and close my eyes enjoying the feel of her against me. When I'm too tired to fight off sleep anymore I give in but not before I feel Lily's lips press gently to my forehead and her whisper,
"Sweet dreams, my beautiful girl." I have exactly that, the only problem is, my unconscious's idea of sweet dreams doesn't star my real girlfriend, but my fake girlfriend is everywhere. I sleep better than I have in a while while dreams of Karma dance easily through my head.
Lily POV:
As I'm cuddled up against Amy's back I let my mind wander. I've never been this open and honest with anyone before. It's new to me and it makes me want to cry. Telling Amy the truth felt like the equivalent of walking on a stage in an auditorium full of people in my birthday suit. But instead of laughing, Amy walked straight up to me and covered me in a blanket. I know for a fact she won't ever love me as much as I love her though. She tries so hard to pretend Karma doesn't own her heart and I can clearly see Karma does the exact same thing. Even though my chances are basically nonexistent, I just can't seem to let her go. She's the realest thing I have in my life right now and if I lose her I'm sure I'll lose myself.
"I would wait for you forever." I whisper into her hair because I know she'll never hear me. She murmurs something and I strain my ears to hear it all. I stop cold when she whispers a name. Karma. It sounds like the weight of Amy's world sits on the shoulders of this one girl and it's enough to make me tear up. I stand up as quickly and quietly as humanly possible so I don't disturb the sleeping beauty. She barley moves at all and it makes me long for her to notice me enough to miss my presence when I'm gone. I know that's asking far too much though. When it comes down to it, I've always known I'd have to say goodbye eventually. I find a piece of paper and a pen easily enough and scribble out a note.
Hey babe,
I had to head out to make sure I had a solid place to sleep for tonight. I'll probably be back over later to check up on you. Don't miss me too much ;)
I kiss the note and place it on her side table so she can see it when she wakes up. Only half of what I had written was true. She didn't need to know I already had a place to sleep. She just needed to know that out of all the things I can have, I'd trade any one of them for even the smallest chance that she would miss me when I left.
Karma POV:
I can't stand not knowing if Amy made it home okay. She was supposed to call me immediately after she got home. I'm almost too furious to be concerned but the part of me the craves Amy like an addict craves their fix wins over in the end. I sigh loudly and yell to my mom,
"I'm going over to check on Amy. Be back later!"
"Okay, love you Karma. Be sure to bring her lots of positive energy so she can heal faster." I roll my eyes before leaving my house. As I arrive I notice Lily's car parked outside her house still. Relief flows through me at the realization Amy is indeed safe but it doesn't last long because something is off. Lily is in her car with her head against the steering wheel when I walk over. I know I'm not particularly fond of her but I open the passenger door and slide in anyway. Nobody deserves to be alone like this. She glances up and gives me a shocked expression when she meets my eyes.
"What are you doing?" She asks with a shaky voice. I can tell she's been crying and although she's not on my top list of people I adore, it makes my heart hurt to see her like this.
"I could ask you the same thing. What's going on?" She looks at me hard and long before I see her resolve dissipate. She lets out a heavy sigh and leans against her window.
"Me and Amy. We're not right for each other. She's too good for me." I'd be lying if I said I didn't just do a full gymnastic routine in my head. I guiltily compose my face into the concerning one it was in before her revelation.
"Why do you say that?" She shakes her head slightly and gives a small, stiff chuckle.
"Because she's in love with you. You're the one she wants. I'd give anything to have her whisper my name in her sleep like she whispers yours," she's sitting up now giving me a look that leaves no doubt in my mind that she's sincere about everything she's saying. That means... Amy loves me. Butterflies appear in the pit of my stomach and spread through my veins leaving a tingly feeling all the way to my bones.
"I know you love her too." It feels like she's looking into my soul and I open my mouth to reply but no words come out.
"Tell her. You won't regret it. It's gonna kill me everyday to know I gave up a girl like Amy and she's just out of reach, but she was never truly mine. She's always been yours Karma. You should go to her. But just know, if you mess this up, I won't bat an eye and I will be the one to pick up her broken pieces, even if she doesn't love me like she loves you. I won't give up on her." She's crying as she says the last part and I stare at her before nodding. She gives me a small smile and I pull her in for a tight hug so I don't have to see her cry anymore. "Thank you." The words leave my mouth and I know I mean it. She sniffles and smiles at me.
"No problem, now get outta here before I change my mind." I give her one last smile before sprinting to Amy's front door. I turn around one last time and see Lily wave with one hand while brushing away tears with the other. I was so wrong about her. If this all works out I should probably get to know her better. She drives away and I turn back to the task at hand. I enter her house without knocking. I haven't knocked on her door since I was 12. This thought makes me smile. When I finally get the courage to open her bedroom door I see her sleeping. I close the door quietly and stare at her. How had I missed out on all her perfect features before? The way her hair falls around her face like a halo makes me smile. I think for a moment before I decide on how I'm going to tell her the truth. I stand up straight and cross my hands over my chest. I take a deep breath and loudly clear my throat to wake her up. Now comes the hard part. I've always been a good actress but I'm done with pretend. I'm going to tell her how I feel even if it kills me.
Amy POV:
I open my eyes when I hear the sound of a voice being cleared. I sit up slowly. I don't feel Lily beside me so I assume the noise came from her. I glance up to see a fuming Karma. Shit. I was supposed to text her when I got home. Even though I can see the anger radiating off of her, she still looks so alluring it makes me swallow my initial shock.
"Did you have a nice nap?" Her voice sounds sweet like honey but I know it's laced with poison. I just keep staring at her. Even when she's angry she makes my heart beat so fast I swear my neighbors two doors down can hear it. She slowly moves closer and I open my mouth to reply but the words won't form.
"Do you know how worried I was?" She's got a whole new look in her eyes now. I've never seen this side of her before so instead of risking having her blow up at me I slowly shake my head no.
"I waited," She takes a step.
"And waited," another step.
"And waited." She's at the foot of my bed now looking straight at me.
"But you never called me." She bends down and places her knees and hands on my bed.
"If you had been hurt I wouldn't be able to live with myself because then you wouldn't know." She's crawling towards me now. Know what? I get my answer after she stops right in front of me. She closes her eyes for a moment then opens them and there's a new fire behind the look she's giving me.
"You wouldn't know that I'm in love with you." My world stops. Karma is in love with me. I replay those words and I can't help the stupid grin from spreading across my face. She smiles back and before she can say anything else my lips are crashing against hers. She inhales deeply as if my lips had opened up her lungs and she can finally breathe. I feel the same electric pull I always do when we're kissing but because I know she loves me like I love her it feels like it's been magnified and concentrated into this one kiss. I pull away and her closed eyes slowly open.
"I'm in love with you too." I whisper into her ear. She moans her approval as if this is all she's wanted to hear and her lips are back on mine. I can feel desire building as our kisses become more and more heated. Somehow we've switched places and that's when I notice her hands under my shirt. Even through the cloud of lust that surrounds us Karma has remembered my injuries and is gently stroking small circles onto my skin leaving a healing fire on every piece skin her finger tips touch. She pulls away and I groan while putting on my best pouty face. It's so unlike me it makes Karma laugh.
"I'd love to do nothing more than to keep kissing you, but honestly, I'm extremely turned on right now and you're hurt so we should probably stick a pin in this." I'm still pouting and she giggles taking my bottom lip into her mouth and sucking it. I moan and she releases me then places a gentle kiss on it. She's smiling a true Karma smile and I smile back, leaning my forehead against hers.
"Say it again." She knows what I'm talking about and she replies without missing a beat.
"I'm in love with you." And that's all it takes to appease me. The mess in my head has cleared because now there's no reason for it. Karma loves me and I her. I don't need anything else, ever. I open my eyes to admire the beautiful creature holding me to her and that's when I see the note. It has a lipstick kiss on it and I know that handwriting anywhere considering we would always write notes to each other in class when the teachers weren't looking. If me and Karma being together was right, why did I feel so wrong? Even though I was wrapped in Karma's arms like I've wanted to be since this whole thing started, I find myself thinking of Lily. What does this mean for her? What does this mean for me? What does this mean for us?