Author's Note: Since I've finally finished with my early round of applications, I figured I had enough time to whip up a few chapters for my stories. I've actually had this one ready for a bit, but I've held out until now because I thought I wasn't updating the stuff I already have nearly enough. This chapter's longer than the previous ones for no particular reason. I'm not going to have an average word count for this piece, instead writing until the I feel the chapter is done. So, without further ado, here's the next chapter of Rekindling the Flame.
It had been hours since she had first stepped in to the lab; yet, Princess Bubblegum was nowhere near finished with her work. "Yoo-hoo!" she called out. "Peppermint Butler!"
A well-dressed peppermint came in. "Yes, Princess?" he asked.
"I need some original high fructose corn syrup to work on my formula. It has to be some of that old stuff from ancient times."
He internally questioned the strange request but outwardly obeyed without question. "Yes, Princess." As he walked to the first storage room, he wondered to himself what Princess Bubblegum was doing with all the strange things she had been asking for recently for plans she did not disclose to anyone. From gasoline to computer parts, he had been going to the top-secret storage room a lot more often. Although he knew the purpose of this particular experiment that held her attention at the present, a final cure to the candy zombie virus, the purpose of the other projects were completely enigmatic. He knew it wasn't someone masquerading as her because his heightened senses would have alerted him to any ne'er-do-well. Could she possibly be…?
He shook his head violently as he opened the first of many doors. There's no way THAT could possibly happen. Even when Mr. Cream Puff was still around, she wasn't anywhere near in love enough to do THAT. Trying to push such thoughts out of his head, he pushed forward to the inner sanctum, where the relics from before the Great Mushroom War were kept. He occasionally wandered around to explore a time far before he had been created.
As he searched for the early forms of artificial sweeteners, Peppermint Butler heard a strange noise coming from a distance. "What in the world could that be?" he wondered aloud. He walked towards the noise and discovered a strange blue box. It fit the description of something called a police box, but it definitely should not have been in the section marked "Transportation."
He was shocked as he saw the box opened and even more so when a man stepped out. "Hello," he said as he looked down. "I'm the Doctor. And it seems I parked the TARDIS in a bad place…is this the Candy Kingdom?"
Eventually recovering from the surprising stranger, he mustered a response. "Uh…yes…" He noticed the man take out a device, which seemed to scan his makeup.
"Hm…roughly 70% candy, 25% miscellaneous organic material, and 5%...demon blood? Ah, so demon blood exists here. I'll have to make a note of that in case I see anyone like old Trigon or Toby…"
"Um…sir, may I ask what you are doing here of all places?"
"Oh, I'm just looking around. A friendly guard from the Fire Kingdom told me this place would be lovely to visit; although, I'm not certain I'm in the best spot."
"How in the world did you get into this vault? It's the most secure place in all of the Candy Kingdom!"
"Hm…maybe I should go park somewhere else then…"
Peppermint Butler sighed. "Oh, forget it. I'm just here to find some high fructose corn syrup."
One of the Doctor's eyebrows rose. "Sorry, high fructose corn syrup?" He rushed back into his box and dashed out carrying a container of the legendary liquid. "Is this what you were looking for?"
Peppermint Butler was now flabbergasted. "How did you get that?"
"Oh, I had a few jelly babies and jammie dodgers lying around, put them into a machine, drew the syrup out of it, and put it in this container. Thing is…I would have expected that this thing would be in everything around here. It's certainly in everything back home. Well, late 20th to early 21st century Earth, but that's beside the point. Why is it so scarce here?"
"Sir…you are a very strange man. I would love to keep talking with you, but I must inform you that you are intruding on important grounds. I'm going to have to take you to Princess Bubblegum immediately."
"Oh, of course! Yes! Bad, bad me just popping in and intruding. Of course, of course, take me to your leader." He grinned. "I love saying that. It never gets old."
As he followed the strange fellow, the Doctor couldn't help but notice the apparent openness of royalty in this world. It was better than being shut out and having to do the detective work himself, although he was quite proficient at doing so since he so often had to. Still, he did have to wonder how such openness came to pass; most places he went to didn't have a single transparent government on the planet, let alone multiple. He gazed out of one of the windows in the hallway and saw the colorful kingdom in its entire splendor. With candy and sugar lining everything from the architecture to the citizens themselves, the Doctor was glad that he hadn't brought any young children. They might have been tempted to devour everything in sight, which would definitely interfere with the Doctor's investigation. Of course, he himself felt tempted to nibble on something, but he turned his attention to the hallways he was passing through.
He found himself being led not into a foyer or a grand hall, but into a laboratory. He quickly scanned it, noting how many chemicals were being studied. Evidently this princess is a woman of science. He grinned as the final door opened. Standing behind the door was a woman who had been busily working on some formula of sorts, her back still to the two of them. She was dressed in a royal dress, despite the lab coat nearby. He wondered why she was ignoring proper safety protocols in such a lab but soon shrugged it off, citing his own disregard for many rules.
"Princess," the fellow said, "I found the high fructose corn syrup, but I seem to have found someone in the forbidden storage room."
She didn't even look up from her formula, her focus the Doctor noted. "Hm?"
The Doctor cleared his throat. "Hello, Princess. I'm the Doctor."
She still didn't turn around. "Peppermint Butler, I don't need a doctor."
"Princess, I didn't send a doctor for you. I found him in the forbidden room! Aren't you even in the slightest concerned with the security of the castle?"
She sighed as she grabbed the container of syrup in Peppermint Butler's hands without turning around. "I get kidnapped by Ice King almost every week. And there hasn't been a serious security threat ever since Root Beer Guy shored up the Banana Guards. There are so many other things to worry about, like this anti-zombie formula."
"Sorry, zombies?" the Doctor asked, his curiosity piqued. He hadn't met any zombies in a long time.
"Over the past few years, there have been several outbreaks of the candy zombie virus, many times directly or indirectly my fault. Although we were able to create an antidote last time, the virus would still triumph if the subject were re-exposed to it. I want to ensure that another such outbreak never happens again, but every time I get closer to the true cure, the one that will forever prevent the disease from returning, something horrible happens and sets me back."
"Let me have a look." Without another warning, he pushed her out of the way, took out his sonic screwdriver, and examined the formula. "Ah, interesting formula. I see you're trying to create a stimulant to help natural antibodies actively combat against such a virus, but the way it's composed it would also stimulate the virus. You'd need some very specific, complex combination of fat, sugar, and protein to perfect it. Something like…"
He reached into his pockets and took out…
"…Fish fingers and custard!" Without another word, he mashed up the two things together and combined it with the formula. "Here you go. That should do it." He held out the formula to her, though he was staring at a small picture of a man wearing glasses, an old English suit, and a bowtie. I wonder who this fellow is…he certainly has very good fashion sense.
She cautiously accepted the formula and took out two trays of cells contaminated by the zombie virus. Pouring some of the formula on the first tray, she saw that the cells quickly reverted to normal. It was nothing that she wasn't already able to accomplish, but, when she combined the trays together, she was shocked to see that the regular cells stayed healthy and the infected cells reverted to normal as well.
"It worked!" she exclaimed. "This is great! All I have to do is give this formula to my machine, mass produce the formula, and give it to the citizens! The days of the zombie threat are gone forever! Thank you so much!"
"It was my pleasure," he said as they met each other's eyes for the first time. He didn't expect her to gasp in surprise. "What? Do I have something on my face?"
"…Are you…human…?"
"Me? Oh, no. I'm a Time Lord. You could easily get confused; humans do look like Time Lords. Which reminds me, how come I haven't seen any humans anywhere?" He pointed the screwdriver at her and analyzed her makeup. "I mean, here you are with 65% bubblegum and 35% other organic materials. It closely parallels the 65% water 35 % other stuff in ordinary humans, but I haven't seen any ordinary humans anywhere. Which shocks me because this is Earth. Well, Ooo as it's now called. Why is it called that? And, back to my original question, why are there no humans?"
She grimaced. "You don't know anything about the Great Mushroom War, do you?"
He frowned and replied darkly, "There's always a war, isn't there?"
She paused for a moment before addressing her servant. "Peppermint Butler, please leave me alone to speak with our guest."
"Princess, with all due respect, our guest was intruding in…"
"I don't care. He has given us the cure to the candy zombie virus. All he's asking for is some history and information. So, if you will?"
He sighed. "As you wish, Princess." He begrudgingly left, leaving the two alone.
"What I am about to tell you is a very abridged version of the war. I myself do not know all the details, but I think I know enough for your needs." The Doctor motioned her to begin, and she started to tell him about the worst war to have ever befallen the planet.
Of the origin of the conflict, no one is absolutely sure of. Of the countries involved, the alliances are unknown, but they were hostile to each other. But of the people involved, their stories of terror and suffering became universal in the world. As one side began to approach victory, the losing side devised the Mushroom Bomb, the most terrifying weapon of mass destruction ever created. Its purpose was to bathe the planet in a horrifying combination of radiation and mutagens to bring the people of the world to their ultimate demise.
However, its true horror was the first creature it created: the purest form of evil to have ever walked the land. He was called the Lich. He was imbued with the raw power of the bomb, and he inherited the power needed to raise the dead and form his army. The mutagens created from the bomb formed his vast horde of villainous creatures that slaughtered first the humans who had survived the bomb untouched and then the ones who had suffered horrible mutations because of it. It was up to the great hero, Billy, to defeat the Lich so that the planet would be able to recover from the disaster. He managed to seal him away in pure amber, allowing the people of the world to finally have peace.
As the remaining life on the planet came to terms with the disaster that had nearly destroyed all life, resolutions were made to prevent such a disaster from happening ever again. As a sign of the new start, the planet was given a new name: Ooo. Many kingdoms were formed, each communicating to each other just enough for diplomacy but not too much for fear of competing alliances.
"Even despite all that had happened to the planet, life continued. Unfortunately, the day came when the Lich was freed from his prison. It was a few years back when he managed to finally free himself. Before he could regain his full power, a hero rose up to defeat him. That hero's name is Finn."
"Finn?" the Doctor interrupted. "Did he happen to have a girlfriend who happens to rule the Fire Kingdom now?"
"Huh? Yes, actually. How did you know that but not know about the Great Mushroom War or even the Lich?"
"Like I said, I travel a lot. Just before I came here, I had a nice little chat with Flame Princess. Kicked me out when I started to talk about him, though. I assume that their breakup wasn't very cordial?"
She shook her head. "It was worse. Finn made her and the Ice King think the other wanted a fight by forging incendiary letters. When he confessed what he had done, she didn't burst into flames and burn anyone. She was far too upset and confused…"
"Ah…that would be why she usurped her father. Blow off some steam, so to speak?" He then silently added, "Perhaps it's time I met this boy…"
She nodded. "She's kept herself busy running the Fire Kingdom to avoid confronting her feelings. I'd say something about it, but then I'd be a little bit hypocritical…"
"Hm? Hypocritical? Are you avoiding someone in your love life?"
She looked at him guiltily and slowly nodded. "Yeah…there was this nice man named Braco. He was infatuated with me, leading himself to physical trauma and a monstrous transformation in the hopes of winning my love. I have to admit that I was touched by his determination, but my duty as princess of the Candy Kingdom would not allow me to love him as he did me. In order to stop him from doing further harm to himself, I created a robotic replica of myself who would be able to spend all her time with him, giving him the devotion that he deserved."
Something in her eyes told the Doctor that it was the truth but not the whole truth. And then he realized something he had missed before. He just had to be careful with how he phrased his inquiry. "Princess…if you don't mind me asking, how old are you?" Well, so much for tact, but there was really no way to sugarcoat it.
She instantly slapped him hard. "Hey! Never ask that question to a woman!"
In response, the Doctor moaned in pain. "OW! That hurt a lot. Are you a mother? They always seem to knock the living daylight out of me…" He saw the next slap coming from a mile away. Again, it really hurt, but it felt somewhat different than the one before. Like it had been done not out of offense but out of a panicked denial to the truth.
As he looked up, he saw that she was trying to put on a cheery face, which would have fooled everyone except those like him who used that façade on numerous occasions. "Another shot at my age? Seriously, I'm only 20 years old. I don't have any children per say, but the Candy People are like my children."
The Doctor pursed his lips. He wouldn't get any answers this way, so he decided to try a new approach. "Alright…different question. How old do you think I am?"
Now, Princess Bubblegum was completely puzzled, unsure of what the Doctor was trying to say. "I don't know…anywhere between your late 20's or early 30's?"
The Doctor chuckled softly. "You're off. Way off. Way, way, way off. While my body appears to be very young, my eyes are very old. 1103 years old to be precise." Her eyes widened in surprise, not expecting how the very young looking man could be so old. "The reason I brought up my age," he continued, "is because I know an old soul when I see one. While it's true that much of you is very young, you are most certainly very old. Not as old as I am, but very close." He paused before realizing something else. "You witnessed the extinction of the human race…didn't you?"
He knew the answer before he asked, and he continued as he saw a grim expression confirm his hypothesis. "I don't need to know the details. I just want to let you know that I understand the pain that such an experience can do to someone. I've not only seen the extermination of races all across the universe, but I also caused many of them myself, including the extinction of my own people." He looked away, unwilling to look her in the eye for this part. "I'm about to tell you some very personal and very damnable things about myself. My people, the Time Lords, were the benevolent guardians of the universe, ensuring the protection of the Time Vortex against those who would abuse its power. It all changed when we went to war to defend time and space from races of beings who wanted to take the power of time for themselves. Time passed, and we changed, survival becoming the only instinct for many. It was near the end when the Council and Lord President Rassilon prepared to initiate the Final Sanction, the last resort to save themselves by destroying all of time and space and transcending to perfect beings of consciousness alone. We had become the very thing we had sworn to destroy, and it was then when I knew I had to stop them all. With the cores of the twin suns, I seized the Moment, preserving all time and space at the cost of all my people and many of the higher species in the universe.
"As if once wasn't enough for the universe, I had to live through the loss three more times. When a renegade Time Lord who called himself the Master resurfaced, I had to stop him from conquering the universe for himself. Although he had caused so much trouble for so many in the universe, I still attempted to save him. He had once been my friend, and I knew that he was capable of good. Sadly, he was killed by a single shot, and I had to carry out the task of burning his body, feeling the same pain I had when the Time Lords fell.
"Unbeknownst to me, he had formed a cult to bring him back to life. Carrying the same madness he had in life, he managed to fulfill a plan to bring the Time Lords back. I didn't know at the time, but the Time Lords had managed to find out about my plan to destroy them just before I actually did. With that knowledge, they managed to manipulate the Master to the point where he created a path allowing them to escape their fate and enact the Final Sanction. I found myself forced to make the decision once again to send the Time Lords back to Hell, fully expecting that I would join them. At the last moment, however, the Master managed to save me, sacrificing himself in the process."
He quickly glanced at her to see an intent, studious look on her face before continuing. "But the worst one, perhaps the most painful one personally, happened between those two times. It was on the planet Messaline when I found myself thrust into the middle of a war. It wasn't to the scale of the Time War, but the combating sides each used advanced cloning technology to churn out soldier after soldier in what was supposedly an endless war. One side mistook me for one of their own and used their machine on me. It extracted my DNA and used the template to create a woman who my friend, Donna, later named Jenny. I thought I had seen it all, but this was a sudden change. I was suddenly no longer alone. I suddenly had real family. I suddenly had a daughter. And then, with a single shot, all that was taken away from me…"
Princess Bubblegum continued to stare intently on the Doctor. He was pouring information he definitely didn't give out easily, but he had only just met her. "Why are you telling me all this?" she asked.
He turned to her with a sad smile. "Because, Princess, we all need someone with whom we can empathize. Although I admit that I can be very thick, I am aware when I see anguish and pain masked behind a cheerful façade; it is, after all, what I do most of the time. Back home, there are only two blokes I know who have lived as long as I have. Actually, they're both technically older than I am, and that is quite the accomplishment. At least they give me an outlet when I need one. I doubt there are any such people around here, and, even if there are, it doesn't seem to me that you really talk to them much. It's alright to let your feelings go; it helps you retain some sense of sanity."
She bit her lip, not sure quite how to respond. The strange man had been able to read her so easily…how? Well, how was because he had apparently underwent so much for the sake of others. Although she wasn't completely sure if his words were true or not, they were certainly compelling and hard to just make up. "I don't know," she said. "I have seen so much, and…it isn't easy for me to people with the stuff inside me."
The sadness from his smile dissipated, leaving a daring but genuine one in its place. "Am I people? Do I even look like people? Trust me. I'm the Doctor."
There was something in his voice that inspired confidence for a moment for her to talk about the memories that had been silently plaguing her for so long. But before she could, the walls behind the Doctor were broken through by an annoyingly familiar figure. "Ice King! What the heck are you doing?!"
The Doctor turned around to see an old man with a very large beard and icy blue skin cackling in a mad laughter. How he was using his beard to fly he had no idea. "Oh, Princess Bubblegum," Ice King said, his eyes shut and his feelings completely oblivious to either the unwilling woman or the presence of the other man, "I have finally come to claim you as my beloved forevermore, duly won in a passionate kidnapping. I will let nothing stand between our true love."
Well, this was a bizarre spectacle, something even the Doctor thought he was too rational to do. He quickly glanced behind him to see Bubblegum's horrified expression. Evidently, this person must have concocted such schemes to steal her enough to cause such a look. "Sorry…what?" he asked.
Ice King suddenly opened his eyes, widening with horror at the strange but admittedly striking man standing right next to the princess he had desired above all the others. "Huh? Who the heck are you?"
"I'm the Doctor," he flatly stated. "And if you were trying to court this woman, you might have wanted to try knocking on the front door. It's not exactly polite to destroy perfectly good walls and barge in." However, he silently added, "Although, I have certainly done that quite a lot in my life, haven't I…"
"Silence!" he boomed, readying his magic. "I will not have anyone try to take my Bubblegum away from me! She shall be my bride, not yours!"
The Doctor narrowed his eyes in the most menacing way he could. "Bride? Are you insane? I'm a married man!" He knew that, if River were there, she might have already stricken him down for insinuating he was married or even interested in another woman.
"Wha—huh?" The charge in his hands dissipated as he dropped to the ground. "You're not here to get in between true love?"
"True love?" If there was one thing the Doctor was extremely passionate about, it was the topic of love, and he was about to launch into a fervent tirade. "True love? You dare call your obsession true love? True love is a mutual bond that transcends the boundaries of time and space. True love is a man protecting the woman he loves for 2,000 years against all the trials to befall them, never resting for even a single second until the moment she is safe. True love is the bond between common kin that allows each member to perform herculean tasks for the sake of family alone. True love is an unwavering belief and an unchallengeable commitment for the one you love in good times and bad. True love is when you both will defy the laws of the universe because you won't surrender no matter what. I've seen all these examples of true love in my 1103 years of life, surmounting all obstacles placed before them. How dare you even consider your insane obsession as true love!"
The Doctor paused to notice how a much different look appeared in the intruder's eyes. It looked as if, in a brief moment of sanity, the man exhibited regret for his ridiculous actions. But, in an instant, a new thought crossed his mind that once again shrouded his reason with deluded fantasies. "You know so much about love…which means I must have all your knowledge!"
Before the Doctor could react, Ice King unleashed enough energy to freeze the almost all of his body. "Ack! Cold! So cold! What the hell do you think you're doing?!"
"When I come back for you, Princess, I'll surely steal your heart at last!" He grabbed the Doctor's back and flew off with him, despite his loud protests.
She reacted and grabbed the jewel around her neck. Although she didn't want to burden Finn on his birthday, she knew he should be the one to help him. "I'm sorry…" she silently said, not sure if it applied specifically to Finn or the Doctor or someone else entirely.
Zombies hate fish fingers and custard. Scientific fact proven by the Doctor. Please give this piece some love and review/favorite/follow it.
UPDATE 3/1/14: Grammar and continuity fixes.