The sound of Tsunayoushi's battle cries resonated throughout the training grounds.
As much as Tsunayoushi fought tooth and nail it was nothing compared to the experience of his godfather. As much as he would have liked to have victory over the other and in the process gaining the respect of everyone around him, it didn't happen that way. It couldn't, for it was not what was written.
The brown haired man breathed roughly in exhaustion, he fell to the ground after sparring with his godfather for a good thirty minutes. Frankly, everyone was surprised he lasted that long. Squalo stood behind Xanxus, his eyes watching the rookie get back up time and time again, thinking ' It's useless, there's no way this kid will amount to anything here,' and ' Why is this sort of person here?!' Xanxus on the other hand looked bored, dead bored. He only reacted when the brown haired man impacted with the wall at the edge of the training grounds, how he then fell harshly to the ground and winced in pain. Regardless of these things, Tsunayoushi did not accept defeat. He was practically a punching bag for thirty minutes straight, yet slowly stands up, hoping for a miracle.
"No-Good Tsuna…" The Italian spoke steadily to the beaten man on the ground. "Where did you learn this…so called 'martial arts'?"
Reborn found the other's physical strength as laughable, just one big joke. Sure, Tsunayoushi was even less than an amateur, but the way that his godson stood, those stances looked strangely familiar. Those stances were meant to be learned, they couldn't just be imitated so easily. Tsunayoushi had talent, but he had no practice.
In the novels that Tsunayoushi had begun to read, his mentor, the one to teach him self-defense and nurtured his growth was always—and will be— Reborn. The man with the fawn eyes was never good at telling lies and he does not want to start now, so he looks up and tells the dark man—
"You did." He trembles as he attempts to stand. "You taught me these things."
In a fit of rage Reborn dashes in a frenzy and delivers Tsunayoushi a finishing blow. It was a punch square in the jaw (perhaps returning the first favor) which sends back the younger man headfirst to the ground. The Italian man thinks that the other has had enough; he won't get up (not this time). But Tsunayoushi isn't done yet, he still attempts to get back up, his knees shaking like a ribbon caught in the wind. He is overdoing it, he knew this to be true but he wants to get a message across to the other man.
'Without you who am I?', Tsunayoushi's eyes seemed to ask Reborn.
I now have an answer.
Their eye contact was cut short, because suddenly the brown haired man seemed to be turning ill. He hurls as if he is going to vomit, but all that he spits from his mouth is blood and one single tooth. When he lifts his head, his eyes were stern, and honest. Reborn had never seen Tsunayoushi so certain of anything in his whole life.
"I am… Sawada Tsunayoushi."
The brown haired male remained in shock, but slowly covers his face to hide his embarrassment, and Squalo whistles, a low to a high pitch to match how impressive the gory sight was.
"Never lie to me." Reborn says with cold eyes, and with that, leaves to the elevator at the edge of the gymnasium.
Xanxus rolls his eyes and stares with disappointment at the young Vongola president, he turns to Squalo who was already calling a medical nurse from inside the building, but not before hearing Tsunayoushi from a distance say "I never have."
The sound of water echoed throughout the bathroom that Tsunayoushi is currently in. After his one sided battle and the treatment from a nurse of the facility, he had made his way toward the bathroom to wash his face.
He looked dreadful.
He looked at himself in the mirror, and began to touch and prod his face in curiosity. His face was bruised and swollen; his eyes were red and puffy as if he had finished a good cry ( he wouldn't let himself) . He sighed as he thought up of an explanation for his appearance to his two elder brothers; Dino and Giotto. Nothing seemed to escape them, and he imagined their worried looks on their faces when they'd see him after this event. Tsunayoushi began to wash his hands and sighed ' But I'm doing this for them. They shouldn't become involved…'
The brown haired man looked around the restroom, looking to see if there was anyone else around, he didn't want to get caught in an embarrassing moment, so when he makes sure that the coast is clear, he takes action. He opens his mouth big and wide to see just exactly which tooth did Reborn manage to knock out, and fortunately for him, it was a tooth way at the back of his mouth.
Tsunayoushi becomes startled when he hears the door opening, and it turns more into anxiety when he sees who had just entered the restroom. It was Xanxus. The man with the violent eyes made a movement that indicated he was aware of the other's presence, a quick nod of the head in Tsunayoushi's direction. Xanxus then steps up to a urinal while Tsunayoushi gives an obvious response to the situation; he looks away respecting the other's privacy. Just as soon as he was turning, something grabs his attention from the corner of his eye— it was a feather. An explosion of feathers erupts on the two men, leaving behind a carpet of colour, their steps now turned cushioned and soft.
Tsunayoushi is unfazed by all of this now, so he just gulps and tries to take in as much as he can from the phenomena. There were feathers from every color , shape and size-it reminded him of the day he signed the acceptance of becoming president of the Vongola, although now he thinks of it as ' Well, what good did that do?'
"The hell are you looking at?" Xanxus asks while looking straight forward at the wall above his urinal. The brown haired man realizes that staring at a man urinating was most certainly weird, so he pretends not to notice the downfall of feathers taking place.
"N-nothing, I-I'm v-very sorry." He stutters.
A sound of a zipper going up is heard, then heavy footsteps.
"Anyways," Xanxus says as he washes his hands, the sound of water hitting the sink magnified ten times than normal. It sounded like drums of war. "The fuck is up with the feathers?"
Tsunayoushi's face looked shocked and disturbed; his pupils became unfocused and wavered. He then turns to the side to look at the mirror and in that quick eye movement he sees something peculiar. The feathers that he could clearly see, touch, and feel as they fell in the restroom showed no reflection in the mirror. It reminded him of the vampire myths that Dino as a child would read to him about, 'Vampires are not visible in mirrors", he remembered the blond telling him.
"You mean you can see them?!"
After the brown haired man's shocked outburst, Xanxus walks up to him with an incredulous look on his face, towering over him easily. His rouge eyes seemed to say 'Do you take me for a fool?'
"Can't you?" The man snorted. "Brat, the first time we talked in the old man's room I saw them too. Not only are you an idiot but you're also blind as well?"
Tsunayoushi's eyes widened. Xanxus could see, he could feel this stop of time—whatever these things are— from the beginning! The man in the white suit knew, he just had to make Xanxus his ally, he couldn't let Reborn have him.
"Xanxus-san, please listen to me…" Tsunayoushi's voice was in a hushed whisper, raspy and urgent. "What we're seeing…is caused by our 'past lives' so to speak. I know this is far-fetched and we don't have much time-"The brown haired man's eyes look in every direction, making sure no one would overhear, and at the same time oversees the phenomena taking place. "But please, won't you listen to me? You're …you're all being tricked, all of us are…"
The taller man stands stunned, but nevertheless stands.
"Trash, that's what you're spouting'. Nothing but shit and stupidity. You got hit in the head too damn hard by your godfather."
Xanxus turns his back on the other, but as soon as he does, feels a sole hand clenching the back of his shirt. He could feel the other trembling, he could feel the hope that the other had bestowed on his back.
"Take your hand off me or I'll kill you."
Instead of having his threat be successful, he is met with cold laughter. The feathers continue to fall, only white ones this time, leaving small spots on the ground.
"You can't kill me, you could never do that….you have no control over my destiny. But, in all honesty," Tsunayoushi looks at the ground.-"- neither do I."
"Bullshit!" Xanxus turns, grabs the other's shirt and pulls Tsunayoushi to face him, lifting him off the ground. "Destiny isn't fucking given, it's earned you pathetic piece of shit!"
It was quiet for some time.
Xanxus suddenly feels droplets of water fall to his hands, his grip still on the smaller man's shirt. In his whole life, he didn't trust anyone's eyes except for his, but it all changed when he saw those small drops morph into little cardboard cut-outs of different shaped stars. They looked like construction paper, those things Xanxus as a kid hated because he was never the one to cut inside the lines. He looks up to find the source of the strange phenomena and sees them coming from Tsunayoushi. They were his tears.
As Tsunayoushi wept his tears turned into little construction paper stars, they fell into the ground, joining the feathers and the blood that came from the brown haired man's re-opened wounds. They stung.
Tsunayoushi's eyes were staring straight at Xanxus, it felt like they were consuming him into a despair that was as deep as the seven seas. The brown haired man then takes a deep breath, all in slow motion, because of the static and the pain.
"Then what the hell am I supposed to do!?" Tsunayoushi's remark ate the whole room entirely, the only thing heard. That was all his confusion amounted to, that single statement something he had wanted to say, his desperation not even on a humane level. He was losing his mind little by little.
The taller man drops his grip on the other's shirt causing Tsunayoushi to fall on his bottom and asks, "What is it that you want?"
Xanxus didn't know what he was saying, he was just reciting phrases like words from a play. The actors were set, and scene! Act 10 Scene 2.
"I want to save you."
Xanxus regains control of his body and yells "Who do you think you are you little shit, who are you to save me!?"
"I would die for you, I would die for everyone, but I only want to because it might be the only way."
That's pissing me off, thought Xanxus , and I don't know why..
Instead of being silent, Xanxus uncharacteristically let's his shoulders relax. Something he never does with anyone.
"Are you afraid of me?"
Tsunayoushi stands up while the feathers stuck to the blood on his shirt. They stained them in nice hues of colour.
"Yes, I'm afraid of you. I'm afraid of your mannerisms, your strength and personality—" The brown haired man swallows. "I'm afraid of everybody in the world. But I still want to protect you, I want to protect everyone, because no one deserves to be lied to. Everyone…deserves to live, but this isn't truly living….Hibari-san has taught me this. I truly believe that."
The feathers come to an abrupt halt. There were no indications of anything abnormal taking place just a few minutes ago. No pieces of a story taking place.
"I'll listen to you." Says Xanxus.
"And why is that?"
Both stare at each other, even though their height was with a miraculous difference, for some reason both now looked at each other eye to eye. Xanxus sighed " Because you're not a liar."
At this the younger man's face erupted to one of happiness, the way he smiled, was a rare, true smile. And it was directed at Xanxus no doubt.
"T-thank you! Thank you so much!" The gratitude was genuine, something he'd never think he'd ever feel for Xanxus, life is strange that way right? He clears his throat and blushes, " I…am going to read to you these two chapters of a book, yes?
Xanxus gives the other a 'are you kidding me' look.
"They're a bit long so please hear me out! You'll understand everything after this, I promise."
Tsunayoushi takes a deep breath—and is prepared to read to him the volume in which he was a mafia boss and Xanxus a leader of an assassination squad called the Varia…
The eldest Sawada's eyes slowly drifted from the magazine to the watch on his right wrist. He ignored the blushes of the nurses directed at his way, only looking up when his name was called for his appointment.
"Giotto," Spoke a man with stubble and glasses, "You look well."
The blond smiled politely. "It's been a while Verde."
The elder man opened the door for the other and nodded.
"What seems to be the problem? I've heard from Reborn you're staying with your youngest sibling."
Verde and Giotto both walk to the opened door in the hall. Like most health care facilities, it smelled like disinfectant, it smelled and looked like vitamins and pills. Syringes. Giotto always hated going to hospitals, because to him it didn't smell like those things at all. To him, it smelled of pure death and felt melancholy. He hated going to the doctor if it wasn't necessary, and he especially didn't like it when Tsunayoushi was ill. If Tsunayoushi were ill, he'd have to go to seek medical attention, and Giotto never wanted the younger to be near one. He didn't know why, but he felt if the younger were to take a single step into those immaculate walls he'd never see him again.
When both males sat down in Verde's office, Giotto began to speak.
"I'm here to ask for your professional advice; you're trained in Psychology correct?" The blond man crossed his legs and narrowed his eyes in deep thought while Verde began flipping through his patient's files.
"Now you have me curious, what is all this about?" The odd coloured haired man smirked. "Giotto are you in distress?"
Giotto did not answer.
"The proud Giotto, asking me for help?" Verde tsk'ed. "The four horsemen of the apocalypse shall make an appearance soon, no?"
The man with the sun for his eyes knew this reaction from Verde would happen, for years Giotto was always one to do things for himself, but now, it is time for him to ask for help. He swallowed his pride and spoke.
"I have made both Tsunayoushi and Dino believe I am perched in my younger brother's home for one reason only, and that is for regaining a lost bond we had between us. But that isn't all, they don't know why I truly chose to stay close to them." Giotto's eyes flickered, the clock on the left ticked loudly. "Since I was sixteen years old, I have been having strange dreams about my smaller brother."
Verde placed a hand as if to pause the other. As if he had heard this millions of times.
"Having sexual dreams we do not understand is normal. It does not indicate you having hidden lustful desires for your sibling. Now it would be a problem if it was every single day, but this seems every other—"
"That isn't that at all!" The younger man massaged his temples, the elder man was obviously getting a kick out of this, Giotto thought. Both Verde and Reborn hate each other but they're exactly alike. " I have dreams with my smaller brother, sometimes, it seems like I am witnessing a film, sometimes I am in the film and I'm watching my movements, but all of them end the same. "
Verde's pen clicked.
"In all my dreams Tsunayoushi dies."
The green haired doctor now seemed like a professional, his hands quick in jotting down his patient's inquiries.
"Is the cause of death always the same?" Verde asks.
"No. He dies differently all the time. Sometimes I've seen Mukuro— he's Tsunayoushi's childhood friend—kill him, although it's always die to a freak accident. Sometimes it's Reborn and sometimes it is other strange and unsettling variations. There are many Tsunayoushi's in my dreams, but I know it's him. Sometimes he is a woman, sometimes a child, always changing of occupation, gender and social status. There are so many Tsunayoushi's I meet in my dreams but they are all 'him'. I have no other way to explain it. But recently…" Giotto clenched the hem of his pants tightly. "The dreams seem more real, or rather my dreams are seeping into my everyday life. I see strange things, sometimes smoke. I feel these dreams or hallucinations coming out to reach me. I have a hard time telling when I'm dreaming or living…. And that is my justification for staying with Tsunayoushi. For I fear that my dreams are a warning of some sort, telling me that if I don't take action now…then he will inevitably disappear one day, without a trace."
The clock's ticking seemed to be in full volume.
"I fear it." Giotto spoke barely above a whisper.
"But I know, this feeling inside me, you could call it a Hyper Intuition if you may, is present inside me so I may be of use to my little brother."
As a scientist and as a medical professional, Verde knew when it was time to draw the line.
"There is a scientific explanation for everything. Now, don't you think these dreams are caused by some type of guilt you may have? Perhaps you think you have failed as an elder brother, perhaps it's some sort of repressed trauma. As for the way you described it, not having any distinction from reality is a trait of mental depression, even schizophrenia."
Verde placed his patient's files back into the cabinet next to him, he moves his eyes to catch a glimpse of Giotto's reaction. He didn't look too convinced; he looked even upset, which was expected of any person to react to a mental diagnosis of that degree.
"This isn't like that at all." The young man at this point was close to snapping at the other. Does he not comprehend!? "These 'dreams' have reached new terrifying levels, more so when I began sleeping in Tsunayoushi's house. Sometimes I am hunted."
Verde's eyes flickered and Giotto didn't like that look not one bit.
"Hunted? By whom?"
"I don't know. Other times I am doing the killing, I'm some sort of Mafiosi, a leader perhaps. Sometimes I'm even a crowned prince. The times when my victims are screaming, or when a person tries to harm me, it feels concrete. The taste of fear, the adrenaline, I feel them through my body."
"Are you familiar with the term 'Hypnagogic Hallucinations'? It will occur when you aren't fully awake or the other. Mental phenomena that occur during this phase include lucid dreaming, hallucinations, out of body experiences and sleep paralysis. They will usually occur when stressed, and many people have experienced them at some point during their lives, but recurrent intense hallucinations can be a sign of an underlying medical condition which may require treatment." The man continued to click his pen every other moment. "Or, it is a mental issue. In that case psychological treatment is needed."
He emphasized 'Psychological Treatment', looking at the blond man in front of him with a mocking superiority, and Giotto scolded himself. He should have never come here, he told himself.
"So you're saying I'm schizophrenic. Is that it?" Giotto's patience was running out. "How can that be when I have never been hospitalized for any mental illness before? My record is clean."
"There are many cases when one is just fine, and out of the blue hits their schizophrenia. It usually occurs in young men in their 20's…" Verde's smirk never left his face. "That is my scientific guess anyway, much better than your hypothesis."
Giotto could not take any more of the other man's condescending tone. He stands up and takes his coat from the hanger.
"Science isn't everything Verde." The younger of the two says at the door, spiteful and annoyed.
"Yes it is." Says the elder man wisely, unaware and ignorant of how the world is complex and mysterious. How it didn't really apply to the laws of this universe, except the human one." We just don't have all the science as of this moment."
Giotto slams the office door roughly as Verde gets ready for his next patient.
When Tsunayoushi returns to his apartment , he is not surprised by the looks on his two elder brother's faces. They were absolutely livid, Giotto wouldn't even give him space or privacy, attempting to see what was under his suit, where the other bruises were.
"Who did this to you?" Dino asked not helping his younger brother from Giotto's clutches. This is justified, he reasoned. He winced as he saw a bruise on Tsunayoushi's chest.
Attempting to cover himself, the youngest out of the trio stumbled upon his words for a bit. "I fell down the stairs."
At that moment the door clicked open to let Reborn in. He took off his hat and coat, placing it on the hanger, but not before Dino notices a patch on Reborn's face.
"Tsunayoushi you are the worst liar." Giotto says, too angry to shout , too concerned to stop. " Tell me the truth this time, who hurt you?"
Dino looks back and forth between Tsunayoushi and Reborn. His brown eyes knowingly looked at them, and said "Ok, what is going on here? Did you two have a fight of some sort? Because if it is, Reborn…I think you took it too far."
"I didn't do anything, right Tsunayoushi?" The Italian man sits down on the couch, not even batting an eyelash. He's thinking ' What did you remember? How much did you remember? Is it time yet?'
Tsunayoushi doesn't say a thing, but as soon as Reborn is seated on the couch he stands up quickly, running to his room.
"Tsunayoushi!" Giotto called after him in worry. The door of his younger brother locked in his face. Dino attempts to coerce the boy to come out, to talk to him, but all they are met with is the same white door. The blond sighs and turns to his elder brother, Giotto was ferocious beyond belief. He looked at Reborn as if he were ready to pounce right then and there, so he did. He let the king of beasts consume his hatred for the other man.
"Get the hell out of my brother's house! Better yet, get out of his life!" Dino attempted to stand in between them but only to be pushed to the side by both Reborn and Giotto. "All you do is cause him pain, because of you he can't think for himself. You, who has encouraged his low self-esteem. He can function without you! He is not yours and never will be! Get the hell out of my family!" He breathed in. "He doesn't need you!"
At that Reborn stands up, and looks at the other with eyes that seemed to bare no remorse. A true carnivore with the thrill of the kill.
"You're the one who is unwanted here. You're nothing but a hypocrite, always insensitive to your younger brother's feelings as a child, ashamed of him because of his mannerisms and cowardly disposition. Tsunayoushi doesn't even like you, he hates you."
"That's to be expected—" Giotto smiled bitterly, as if it were all one big joke. "It's what I deserve after I've treated him so cruelly right?"
Right when Giotto finishes what he has to say, he turns and heads toward the room lent to him by his younger brother, and in that split second Dino notices something. At the moment Giotto turns to the room, there is something in his eyes.
It only donned on Dino the moment his elder brother shut the door what they were. They were his tears.
The faucet began to drip a bit, the light off Reborn's lighter was the only light in the house. As it flickered, he lighted up a cigarette, smoked it, and blew out a white cloud.
"You know…" Dino began, the taste of the cigarette is vanilla, he gathered. " iotto and Tsuna are very alike. You wouldn't think it, but they are. I guess only people that have lived with them their whole lives would know. Both are very sensitive to their feelings as well as others. They just know you. They just do." The blond seemed mature, his business face was on. A grand stallion. "They also have the same responses, but not the same reaction to things. I'm the only one that's different between the three of us. I'm not so forgiving."
At this, Reborn's looks at Dino through the corner of his eyes.
"The next time you hurt either of them with your actions and words, I'll be the one angry."
The blond storms out the house, angry and in need of a drink. He does not give the other a second look, too wrapped up in his own thoughts to care. There he leaves Reborn left to his own thoughts, no reaction on his face but only one of cold indifference. He keeps on smoking his cigarette, the tobacco scent is a strong one.
"Like a butterfly to a cocoon," Reborn warns as he lights out his cigarette on the ashtray. "Soon you two will be ripped off.
Mukuro lifts his head to see an empty classroom, a nostalgia hits him at full force. A dark green board that reminded him of voices and laughter, the chalk that reminded him to take notes. The only difference was that the seats usually filled with students were empty, he was the only one in the classroom, and only then did he realize how big the room actually was. School is made from the people that attend.
"Ah," The indigo haired man says as he lifts his head up. "I'm dreaming again."
Mukuro adjusts his vision to the only other person in the room, his head down and his shoulders moving slowly. It was Sawada Tsunayoushi, not the present time one, but the tween that was bordering on adolescent, the Tsunayoushi that Mukuro fell in love with. Looking at the boy's sleeping form brought back many memories that felt dear to him. Tsunayoushi's shoulders and back were of a great comfort to the young Mukuro's school days. Whether it would be a problem at home, or a boring day at school, those shoulders and mop of hair reassured him that he was strong. He had to be strong, because he wanted to be by his side.
As the heterochromatic man stands up he notices his reflection on the windows to the side of him. His reflection is one of a young teenager donning a fashionable yet rebellious way about him. Young and Angry.
He smiles that cruel smile of his and laughs through his nose. Time flies by so quickly doesn't it, he thinks when he turns once again toward Tsunayoushi. He walks as he takes off his jacket, only to drape it over the other's shoulders as a blanket of some sort.
The windows of the classroom were all open as the sun had begun to set. But even though the bloody sun was towering over the whole classroom, Mukuro could only stare at the person in front of him. He leans closer to the other boy's ear.
"You don't understand my love, neither of us does," Mukuro says to the sleeping boy, the alice stuck in the dreamland. "Why else do these type of things keep happening?"
"Because of fate."
Slick white shoes hit the ground in a playful fashion. Byakuran stands with a suit ridden of its jacket, his monochromatic scheme is a dreary comparison to the colour and life of the school. He stood out.
He waves at the confused boy in front of him. "Hello there!"
The indigo haired boy's eyes narrow in mistrust, his shoulders grow tense but at the same time alert as he steps in front of the sleeping boy's desk. Shielding him.
"Who are you? What are you doing in my dreams?"
Byakuran reaches for a small bag of starbursts that he had in his pocket.
"It's a pleasure to meet you Muku-chan!" The white haired man exclaimed. "I've known you since forever, but this is the first time I'm meeting you in this life. Still the same as ever!"
Mukuro had never seen the man in front of him in his life, but he plays along anyway.
"Quite rude, don't you agree? That you know my name but I don't know yours." He does not leave Tsunayoushi's side. "Whatever should I call you?"
"Hmmm, my name's Byakuran! But you can call me Byaku-byaku!"
"Charmed," Mukuro says not really meaning it. "Now I'll ask you again, who are you? Why are you in my dreams?"
The white haired man suppresses a giggle, the bag of candy making noises every time he reaches for more.
"I'm god." He says in between chews, as if talking about the weather, as if saying ' 2+2=4'. That sort of thing.
A far off bell begins to ring, destiny was turning.
The classroom's desks and chairs had begun to decay, turning into nothing but old wood and dust. A few leaves were growing from a stubby leg, but the three people in the room stay in the exact same spots, in the exact same positions.
Mukuro had on his poker face, a smirk with sharp eyes that he had perfected over the years. There were no signs of disbelief, no grand turmoil in his mind. "We are asleep." He proposed. "Our life is a dream. But we wake up sometimes, just enough to know that we are dreaming. Am I right? But only a few people in the world have caught on to this?"
Amused at the other's hypothesis, Byakuran pops another starburst into his mouth and walks up toward the teacher's desk. He leans on it. "You're warm!" He says in a sing-songy voice. "— but not really. Everything you have dreamed, was merely you existing in all the books you are written in. You're a smart boy Muku-chan, so please try to catch up. The you in this world, when you are awake is living this life. But when you are sleeping you are merely reliving countless of lives all at the same time. You are catching glimpses of what you were, or what you have become. Of course the sleep cycle is 90 to 110 minutes, that is when you experience this 'phenomena'."
Right when Byakuran closes his mouth and inserts another candy, Mukuro yelps in pain and clenches his discolored eye. He had never felt this amount of pain before in his life, it felt like the white haired man's voice was reaching out and probing his brain. Tearing down his skull. At that moment there was an overwhelming amount of imagery being sent to his mind, it was like a photo slide show with an inhumane and impossible speed. He collapsed onto the floor withering in agony, revealing to Byakuran the view of his 'infected' eye. There were no pupils or iris. Instead there is a small little film screen, showcasing every single thing that Mukuro was seeing at that exact same moment in his mind.
"Everything you see here in this dream, right now, the meeting of me and you, it's out of the ordinary. It's a disturbance in the flow of this universe. This has never happened before."
Mukuro stopped shaking, composing himself as if nothing had just happened. His breathing was erratic, yet he did not let it tarnish his pride. Because in the moment he was assaulted with countless of imagery, he saw countless of his past lives as if he were reading each one, and it stopped right when Tsunayoushi fought with his godfather Reborn. Now, in the man's right eye was a kanji for the number 'six'.
A mist flame forms in his right eye as his stance changes to one of combat. A trident, deadly, and menacing is on his other hand, pointing at god's neck.
The Realm of Demons
"I understand everything now. Well that is, everything that you have let us know, correct?" Mukuro looked absolutely mad, a large smirk donning his face, his eyes wild as a beast. "Please humor me, oh Divine Creator! I'm afraid I have not yet grasped all of this." Mukuro's other eye twitched uncontrollably, his voice in a shaky tone. "Does this mean..…every single person in this world has a book written specifically for them? You've casted them a soul and you've been reusing their souls over and over again? Is this how this universe works? Is this the truth of this universe?"
Byakuran continued to eat his sugary concoctions as Mukuro spoke, not even a least bit concerned of the sharp ends aimed at his neck.
"You're the only person that has figured this out. You deserve a gold star!" The white haired man out of nowhere took out a party popper, unleashing its streamers and confetti. "Everyone else, by that I mean all the people in your life, those who think they've learned something about how this universe works, think that only they have books written for them, that they are merely characters." Light amethyst eyes brightened. "— but that's not entirely true! Sure, I have used them to learn from their experiences, but this is a give and take relationship. They know nothing that everyone else in this world is exactly like them. This is how the world I created works. It's very convenient for me, especially to manage. It's way better than Shouchi's world. His universe sucks; his is so small compared to this one! There is only one planet that humans can live on and it's called 'Earth'. What a dumb name!"
Mukuro's trident does not waver. He wants to ask so many questions, mainly 'Who is Shouichi? Why Earth? Everyone knows it is an inhabitable planet. Does this mean there are many different universe's besides this one? Is my existence important?'
"So Tsunayoushi and the other others only think that this problem exists within our little sphere, but really it's on a much wider scale. This affects the whole universe you have created." As soon as the indigo haired man muttered those shocking revelations, the whole classroom turns to dusk.
Mukuro couldn't feel himself; he could only feel wind all around passing where his ears should be. He smells a small fragrance of lotus flowers and hears the sound of water dripping. A tap someone forgot to close.
"Did you see all those times you accidentally killed Tsunayoushi when you were trying to protect him? I almost feel sorry for you."
The voice was coming from all around, as if it were on a speaker at a department store. No escape from Byakuran's voice.
Mukuro clenched his teeth.
"He always chose to die; I won't kill him this time. I'm sure of it."
"You can't fight destiny." Byakuran's voice echoed.
Suddenly Mukuro begins to feel his body again, but could only see the blackness of the cosmos. He feels something heavy weighing him down and his clothes becoming damp. He does not see it, but deduces the only thing he could associate this feeling as. A bath, a dip in the pool, the ocean. Trapped. Chained. Aborted.
He begins to feel rage. The rage of an apocalyptic adolescence.
"This whole world can burn for all I care."
"Are you angry with Hibari?" Byakuran asked like a parent scolding a son.
"Hibari doesn't know what true pain is." Mukuro does not move his lips yet his still speaking, although he is not sure why or how. "He is selfish and spoiled. He has no personality none whatsoever, and yet—Tsunayoushi…he…"
The water suddenly engulfs him whole, like the sea sinking down a ship, its anchor stuck in place.
A pain hit his eye so great, that it made him want to die right there and then. It was the worst feeling in the world, he couldn't breathe, he couldn't see, just pain, nothingness all around.
"Tsunayoushi—" Mukuro says as he reaches out his arm to nothingness. "… is an idiot."
As Mukuro fell deeper and deeper into an all-consuming darkness, he remembers a moment in his youth.
Mukuro was at his room working on his desk. He had a glass case open and he placed a picture frame inside the said case inside. Next to him were jars filled with a pallet of colours and shapes. They were dead butterflies that he had collected severely over the last few weeks. It was his newest hobby and he was the sort of person that once claimed a hobby, lived and breathed it. He was a boy that grew up to be a man of many talents.
As he prepared his tongs to grab the first butterfly for preservation, the door swung open.
"Mukuro-kun!" Tsunayoushi smiled that shy smile of his. "Me and Chrome-chan finished making the curry!"
"My, my, is that so? Then I'll be there in just a moment."
"Ah, Mukuro-kun? What is this?" The brown haired boy motioned his hand toward the items on theother boy's desk. In closer inspection his eyes widened a considerable amount. "Hiiee!? Mukuro-kun are those butterflies?"
"Yes," Mukuro flashed the other a charming smile. "It's my new hobby, butterfly preservation. Beautiful aren't they?"
The brown haired boy nodded wearily." "But…"
"But what?" Mukuro asked as he placed a Monarch butterfly at the center of his display.
Isn't this too sad? I mean…they're dead. Isn't this cruel?"
"With the things that I love , I want to preserve them as long as possible. I am not content on just looking at them."
"Hence why you caught these butterflies right?" Tsunayoushi tapped the jars lightly, his eyes sad.
" Yes, I'd rather kill the things that I love rather for them to escape me."
"Haha, well at least you're not like that with people!"
Mukuro smiles.
What you are going to be, what you are destined to become is determined long before you are born. But in your case, just as Tsunayoushi's case…as well as every single person alive in this universe, your souls are different, because all of you were never born.
Just what do you mean we were never born? Answer me.
I can't. You would not be able to understand me as you are now Mukuro. You are but a mere human, telling you all this would be meaningless.
And why is that?
Because you'd go mad. A human who knows too much would go absolutely mad.
Are you truly god? Then answer me this, why do some people suffer while others do not? Who is Shouchi?
I am god. Yet, not truly. I am the god of this universe, but if you are asking me if I am the god that has created me and all of the universes, then no, no I am not. He's my boss. I'm more of a manager here to reinforce god's will. I will only tell you this much about myself.
So are you the one who created us or not?
I created you but not this world; there are only three people in this world that I did not create. Two were gifts by a colleague, the other, I have no control over, he's a guest who has overstayed his welcome. You could say I am in debt.
Mukuro could feel his body once more. He started to regain some sort of clarity into his thinking pattern, he furrowed his eyebrows and felt water all around him, he felt himself floating.
Why are you telling me all this?
The first human to be created in my image is you, Mukuro. You're also close to Tsunayoushi, I want to ask you to get the key back for me, if you do I'll burn the ending of this world and write one to suit your desires.
Why is the key so important to you?
It is job related, I can't disclose any more information on it. Do we have a deal or not?
Mukuro opened his eyes slowly and realized he was in his most hated nightmare.
He was in a tube being kept prisoner, he was kept in bondage with chains and a white straight jacket. It was a watery grave; the only thing keeping him alive were the dozens of tubes attached to his body, the oxygen mask on his face.
'We humans' he spoke in his mind. 'and everything we have ever created and achieved only stand to us. Is that correct?'
"Of course, human achievement does not matter to us in the slightest." Byakuran said in front of the tube, the only thing separating them mere glass.
'Then why should a supreme being as yourself make deals with me? Surely you can get the key back; after all you're the god of this world after all.' Mukuro's hair was moving back and forth in the water, the top of the tube had lotus blossoms that would sometimes float into the sight of his vision.
"I can't go in while Reborn is there." This was the first time the deity looked anything but pleased. "You know that."
'Reborn?'
"You don't know who he is?" Byakuran looked surprised, but then, his eyes froze in deep thought. "I guess you didn't remember that. He must have erased all memory of that," The white haired man raised a finger to his head as if solving a giant puzzle." Then I wonder why did he let everyone remember when he killed Tsunayoushi, hmmm."
The chains inside the water tank rattled.
'I don't understand what is going on, but the only thing I am certain of is that I am not doing your dirty work. All I know is that you aren't all powerful, you have your limits. There is a way to defeat you and I'll find a way. I'll just stick close to Reborn."
At this Byakuran's pupils erupted.
"You're going against God?You are doing this all for one man? For Tsunayoushi and because of your ego?! You humans astound me!" The white haired man sighs as if it really mattered to him, takes one last pout and turns away. He faces an elevator at the edge of the room.
"Well Mukuro, since I don't have the key with me, I can't foresee anything that will happen to this world. As for Reborn, this is the first time in all your lives that you have teamed up with him…that's strange. Who in the world teams up with the Prince of Darkness?"
Mukuro's eye opened rapidly. Satan? Lucifer? Beelzebub? Reborn is…Mephistopheles?
'Where are you going now?' Mukuro asks as the white haired man enters the elevator.
"I have to go to my boss and make something up."
'And where is that?'
As the doors begin to close Byakuran opens a bag of white and pink marshmallows. The sound of the bag opening gave off a saccharine scent.
"To Heaven's Gate of course."
Everything turned black.
Please wake up. None of this is real. You're just having a nightmare. Please wake up.
When Mukuro opened his eyes, he realized that the voice who was calling him, the hand reaching out for him in the darkness was none other than Tsunayoushi.
He clenched both his fists while still in bed, tightens his eyes and suspires angrily in indignation.
"Idiot."
Tsunayoushi opened his eyes to find himself at the bottom of the sea with coral reefs and anemone. A great Hump Back whale passed him by, as did a small group of jelly fish. He had on no clothing and had his knees to his chest as he stared at his surroundings.
He was unusually calm for someone floating underneath the seven seas, but perhaps the reason he was so calm was that he had the ability to breathe underwater. It smelled like rain and the sun. He looked up to see a kaleidoscope of colours on the ocean's surface, but what interested him the most was that there was another 'him'. This one had clothing dated way back to 18th to 19th century Europe. He was dressed as a young noble, standing on the ocean's ground with shined shoes and an extravagant coat. But the peculiar thing was that as the other 'him' opened his mouth, small red bubbles came gushing out. There was a wound in his stomach.
"Hello," Is what Tsunayushi says to his other self and the other replies back with the same gesture.
"What are you doing here?"
The other Tsunayoushi smiled. "I'm drowning." He said it as if it was an obvious thing, like talking about letters and buttercups. "I had a little scuffle on the boat I was on, during the commotion I was thrown off the boat."
"I see." Tsunayoushi reminds himself to try to find which volume of the books would that life be. "Well then, how come I'm here being me, and you're over there being you?"
"We're all just being together." The other Tsunayoushi responded as a small school of zebra fish encircled him, leaving Tsunayoushi's vision clouded by white and black. The two colours mixed, the water level disappearing as if someone unplugged the ocean's cork.
"You are another version of me, or maybe I'm another version of you?"
Tsunayoushi was now fully clothed. He wore only a hospital night gown all the way to his knees. He looked up to find himself standing in front of a small cottage house, those that looked like a fairytale. A young girl walked out of the house, carrying two pails of fresh milk, she begins to walk, but only to trip on a small pebble.
"Don't cry over spilled milk." She muttered to herself as she sniffed. She looked up to see ta male standing in front of her with a concerned look. She and Tsunayoushi shared the same face, they looked like identical twins even though their hair length varied.
"You're right to be confused." The girl responded to her male counterpart. "If we were truly together then why don't we experience the same things?"
Tsunayoushi dropped to the floor to help pick up the girl's things, but as soon as he touched the milk, the scene changed into one of an aristocratic castle made of glass with flowers all around. They all bloomed at the same time, as if welcoming the guest who arrived on his knees.
He was in front of a throne, with another 'him' standing and looking down at him. He looked a bit older, more gentle and less of a child. Someone worthy to be a king.
"We do experience the same things." The older Tsunayoushi told the other in a soothing voice as he crouched down to one knee. "We have to, and this is because we are all fundamentally the same. We are all the same, we are one, one soul. We will always end up the same way."
The older Tsunayoushi hands his double a gloved hand in support. Tsunayoushi stands looking quite embarrassed as the man identical to him flashed him a kind smile.
Is this really me?
As if reading the other's mind the elder Tsunayoushi laughs and says, "Of course I am. Who would I be but you?"
"Oh." Says the modern Tsunayoushi, the one who has a hospital nightgown. "I understand now. The thing we experience is how life in itself binds us."
"Right," Say's the aristocrat. "It's just a different perspective."
"But why do I exist?" An innocent question. "Why do we exist?"
"Because of the Gods."
Tsunayoushi suddenly sees a row of books all aligned delicately on a shelf. The shelf had destroyed the roof for it was as high as the heavens and on top of it was a magnificent tree that had millions of bird nests. A tree of knowledge. A tree of birth. Chirping of birds could be heard and twigs fell lightly toward the library's carpet. Byakuran stood next to the roots of the tree, making stacks of books and recording the numbers and titles. He smiled at Tsunayoushi tenderly, his eyes shining like stars and his mouth like a snow white sweet kitten's.
"Why do I have life?" The brown haired man asked the deity.
Byakuran walked in casual steps and caressed the others face slowly. Tsunayoushi did not back away from his touch for it comforted him and made him feel dead. Eternal peace.
"Because I longed for you."
"Why do I have life?" Tsunayoushi asked again as he was mesmerized by the other's amethyst eyes.
"Because I wished nothing more than the best for you— for all of you."
"Then what will I amount to in the end?"
But he had no one to answer his questions as the scene changed once more. It was a hallway with millions of doors, and since Tsunayoushi did not recognize the building as his own, he began to panic. It reminded him of Reborn's story. The house with millions of doors. What good would it do if he took a single step forward? It would all end the same, everything would be the same. He's be in the same hallway with different doors, he'd still be Sawada Tsunayoushi that one guy who used to cry every day at kindergarten and that liked his miso soup warm.
He lowered his body, crouching down in the hallway.
"I give up. I won't fight this anymore."
He stays like that for quite some time, letting time go pass hour after hour. Sooner or later, he went to sleep. Who knows he thought. Maybe I can sleep for millions of years like that one story. He drifts off to sleep.
"Tsunayoushi."
What is it?
"Tsunayoushi."
Don't turn on the lights.
"Herbivore!"
Tsunayoushi woke up to still be surrounded by millions of doors, the passageway still narrow and never ending. He tried to search for the sound again, confused and worried that he had imagined Kyouya's voice.
"Herbivore, look up!"
Instinctively, he looks up to see the ceiling, surprised at what he found there.
It was Kyouya's arm, just his arm and nothing else.
"Hibari-san!" Tsunayoushi straightened his gown to try to lengthen it because of the cold. "I'm right here!"
"Grab my hand!"
Tsunayoushi jumps on his tiptoes, miraculously grabbing the other's arm. Kyouya's hand to Tsunayoushi felt strong, concrete. He was being pulled upward and upward, the ceiling going through him as if it were a curtain.
When he was completely taken in by the ceiling, Tsunayoushi comes face to face with Kyouya. The taller man was wearing a black men's kimono, complete with a half coat and the more he looked at him, Tsunayoushi felt awoken. The brown haired man couldn't explain it, but he felt that this Kyouya was the real one. Not the one he would meet in his dreams, if that made sense.
" Hibari-san." Is all Tsunayoushi could say, embarrassed ( and not to mention cold) because of his hospital gown. He forgets about his embarrassment to look around his surroundings.
"But this," Tsunayoushi whispered. "—Is my living room."
The taller man sat on the coach, inspecting the other as if he were some intruder.
"What are you doing in my dreams?" Kyouya asked rudely.
Hibari-san felt it too, Tsunayoushi thought, he knows I'm me.
"I don't know...what's happening to us Hibari-san?"
"I don't know."
"Will we ever wake up?"
The question was met with silence.
"This isn't my first dream today. The setting kept changing, it was very different from the other times. It feels like…those lapses of times, those strange illusions we see in our everyday life." Hibari looked at Tsunayoushi with scrutinizing eyes. " And you, why are you wearing such an indecent thing?"
"How is this indecent!?" Tsunayoushi asked in indignation.
"You aren't a women." Hibari said casually. "It is quite strange to wear a dress."
"It is a hospital gow—" But before the brown haired man could defend his masculinity Hibari throws his jacket at the other. ' Wear it' Kyouya's eyes said.
"Thank you." As soon as Tsunayoushi put the coat on, he was met with warmth. The coat was of good quality, it was too big, but it would do." This sort of reminds me of something…"
Kyouya blinked.
"When I was small, I liked to try on my father's shoes and try to walk with them. It was a secret I shared with no one. I don't know why, but when I tried it on I—"
The man with kind eyes stops in his speech, closes his mouth and is in deep reminisce. His eyes flicker for a moment, and Kyouya is watching it all. What could the herbivore be thinking? A moment passes, and Tsunayoushi's eyes grew to one of an omnivore.
"There are billions of people in the world, in the universe. All of us are defined by our feelings, thoughts, ideas, I am pretty sure, somewhere in the world, in the cosmos there is someone just like me." Tsunayoushi looked to the wall in front of him and not at Kyouya, his whole body turned the other direction. "So if there is someone just like me, then is my sense of 'self' really all that important to begin with?"
"And if our entire existence, the entire human race were to end one day, would it be noticed?"
Kyouya's countenance did not change. "You are frightened of your self-realization to cease in our death." He added.
The brown haired man nods, still not looking at the other.
"Then you are a fool and a coward." At this statement Kyouya grinds his teeth, his eyes enraged. "It is common knowledge that even though 'life' seems permanent it is actually the smallest moment in the life of the universe. You would know this if you weren't such a herbivore."
"I'm not a coward." Tsunayoushi snapped back, the way he actually made any attempt to retort to Kyouya was a shock that even surprised himself. "I'm not afraid of death... the thing I'm truly afraid of is love. And by that I mean platonic love... Death is predictable, while love on the other hand is something that leaves you rotting from the inside without caring about the question if you had enough of it."
Love was something both of them had not addressed, so both of them do not instigate the subject any further.
"Hi-Hibari san…H-hibari-san…" By that time Tsunayoushi was concentrating so hard on holding himself back from crying he could no longer speak at all. But even so, he musters the only thing he can say. He covers his mouth, roughly. His voice muffled as he spoke. "I don't want to die, I don't want to die."
"Calm yourself." Kyouya commanded as he stood in front of Tsunayoushi, making sure the other had no choice but to look at his face.
"How can you be so calm?" Tsunayoushi inquired as he began looking at the ground.
"Because this is a dream."
"How can we be sure?"
"We need to wake up."
"How would we do that?"
The charcoal haired man walked up to Tsunayoushi's bookcase, fingering the spines of whatever caught his eye.
"We wait, of course." Kyouya took a book off the shelf entitled 'Nipponia nippon'. He flipped through its pages and looked at the pictures of birds. "To make certain this is a dream that we are both aware of, we will confirm it by both meeting in the hallway of our apartment doors."
The brown haired man nodded, nervous as he twiddled his thumbs. The sound of chirping birds could be heard in the distance.
"Tsunayoushi," Kyouya's voice reached the other's ears, and that time only did their eyes lock. "There is only one thing I have in comment to your concerns."
The brown haired man gulped as Kyouya's eyes turn into something soft, no bite into it, no frost.
"There is nothing to fear—"His voice could be nobody but Kyouya's. " –when I'm by your side."
In that split second, Tsunayoushi was speechless, how could he possibly respond to that? He wasn't sure of his feelings, the bittersweet air engulfed him and left him confused. But as Hibari kept looking at him more thoughts started to sprout out of his mind.
'Without the key I have a choice now. Why am I acting like I'm dead? There is an infinite number of possibilities I can pick and choose without anyone telling me otherwise!'
Kyouya inspired him. The trust they both had seeped through their eyes.
'I know my self-worth! Maybe I…' He imagines the face of the Tsunayoushi he met in the glass castle with millions of flowers '...maybe I can become a king too.'
The shorter of the two men stands up proudly and abruptly to say—"I swear to you that I'll change this world! And no one can stop me otherwise!"
-then Tsunayoushi woke up.
Thank you for the wait, and thank you so much for reading! Ok, so I know the surreal factor was raised up to 100 in this chapter! But now you know how some things really work. Next chapter will have Hibari's version of the dream, meaning everything that he experience will be told. Not only that but you guys will be proud of Giotto, Aluade makes an appearance also. Byakuran's job will be shown and many more to come. All next chapter! I hope you like that I made this one extra long...20 pages! It's all to thank you for all your words of encouragement.
Next story to be updated will be Eat Me Drink Me
Now before I close this note I want to say something, Please everywherebut! Please turn on your messaging system back on. I would like to keep in contact with you dear friend.